“That one’s just a little too close to jailbait for my tastes.”
Garret leaned forward and gave him a suggestive grin. “Oh, but you know she’d be sweet. All that virginal innocence just waiting to be tasted.” He shook his head as he leaned back, keeping his voice surprisingly low. “Besides, down here there’s no reason to worry about the law. Her daddy would probably sell her to you for the right price.”
Colin wasn’t sure what turned his stomach more; the vulgar innuendo or the fact that Garret was probably right. This wasn’t the typical tourist stop on the picturesque little island. It was a local hangout, the kind of place that tourists usually had enough sense to stay far away from. Colin had come there with Garret, and it had been immediately apparent that he was known to the owner. The girl in question was sweeping the floor and drawing all sorts of leering glances from the handful of men in the bar. Sooner or later one of them was going to make a grab for her. Today or tomorrow or next week or next year, if she kept working there, one or more of them was going to drag her into a back room and tear every bit of the innocence from her eyes. Colin clenched his beer tighter as Garret nodded toward a drunk slumped over a table in the corner.
“I happen to know that’s her father. I also happen to know he’d sell his own mother for a bottle of tequila.”
Colin started to shake his head again, but stopped himself. He’d made arrangements to put on a little show for Garret’s benefit. It was scheduled to take place the following day. The DEA and ATF were working with the Mexican authorities in a joint effort to shut down the pipeline of illegal drugs and arms that seemed to run unhindered through Mexico. The ATF was trying to halt the sale of illegal arms to Central American guerillas and the DEA was out to shut down the drug trade that went hand in hand with the guns. It was one of the largest joint operations in history. And Colin was right at the heart of it. Garret was a facilitator. He put dealers in touch with buyers on both ends of the pipeline. So far no less than five US agents had wound up dead in the operation. There was no doubt that Garret was responsible for at least one of those deaths. It had happened on the last cruise Garret had taken the year before, and the man who’d died had been a friend of Colin’s. That was the biggest part of the reason Colin was there. He was going to find a way to take Garret Palmer down. Before he could make that dream come true, though, he had to gain Garret’s trust. It wasn’t going to come easy, and Colin had figured there was one sure way to gain it. If Garret witnessed Colin committing a crime, he’d come a hell of a lot closer to thinking they might be kindred spirits. If the crime was particularly violent, all the better. So they’d made arrangements to make something happen. Colin figured a drug deal gone bad was always a nice touch. Now, though, he was wondering if there might not be something even better. It took him all of forty-five seconds to decide to go off script. There would probably be hell to pay once word of it got back to his superiors, but Colin had learned a long time ago that following his gut when he was undercover was always the way to go. Right now his gut was telling him that Garret would be much more impressed by rape than he would be by drugs. Colin met Garret’s gaze.
“How much do you think he’d want?”
Garret gave him a look that suggested he was vaguely surprised by the question. Clearly he hadn’t expected Colin to actually go with his idea of buying the girl. He glanced at the girl, then turned back to Colin. “A hundred bucks ought to take care of it.”
Colin nodded, then reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. It proved a hell of lot harder waking the drunk up than it did bribing him to allow his daughter to be raped. He didn’t even pretend to be offended or to misunderstand when Colin laid the money on the table in front of him and nodded toward the girl. The old man snatched up the cash and called his daughter to the table. As Colin grabbed the girl’s arm he swore to himself that when this was all over he’d come back to this bar and beat the living shit out of the greedy old bastard.
The girl didn’t give him any trouble as he led her through the back door of the bar. Her father had provided a helpful suggestion for where Colin could take her, and he went straight to the little adobe hut behind the bar. There was a woman in the kitchen when Colin and the girl came through the door, but she took off the moment she saw them. One more adult turning a blind eye to what she had to know was about to happen. Colin glanced out a window as he passed and saw Garret leaning against the doorjamb in the bar’s rear door. The sick bastard wanted to hear it happen. He wanted to hear the girl screaming, and Colin knew he was going to have to give him want he wanted. His grip on the girl’s arm must have tightened reflexively because she made a noise and tried to pull away from him. He turned to face her, then softly told her to run in Spanish. He gave her a look that brooked no argument, and she didn’t hesitate to obey him.
He let her take about three steps before he went after her. He made sure she got out the door before he caught her. He made sure Garret could hear him tell her in graphic detail exactly what he was going to do to her. She started screaming just like Colin had known she would. And then he made certain Garret got a good look at the slap he delivered to the terrified girl before he threw her over his shoulder and turned to carry her back in the little adobe house.
Garret was waiting for him when he came out half an hour later. Colin saw him glance toward the house curiously. He fixed Colin with a faintly mocking look.
“You didn’t kill her, did you? That might cost you a bit more money.”
Colin shook his head, refusing to let the revulsion he felt for the other man show. “She’s not dead, though she’ll probably wish she was when she wakes up. She wasn’t exactly a willing participant.”
Garret nodded. “Yeah, I saw she tried to run. So how’d you keep her down?”
“I tied her ass to the bed, that’s how.”
Garret laughed then, and Colin had to use every ounce of self-control he possessed to keep from hitting him. The girl was unconscious. Colin hadn’t had any other choice but to put her out with a little pressure on her carotid artery. She’d wake up with a headache and probably a bruise from where he’d slapped her, but otherwise she was unharmed. The moment he got away from Garret, Colin intended to make a call and have someone pick the girl up and make sure her father didn’t try to pull a similar stunt again. It would also keep her from telling anyone that she hadn’t actually been raped. He nodded toward the bar.
“Let’s go get another drink.”
Garret nodded, then led the way into the bar. They downed a couple more drinks while Garret pumped Colin for details about the event. Colin made it up as he went, lying with so much ease and skill that it left him feeling even dirtier than he already did. He hadn’t really hurt the girl, though there was no doubt he’d scared her badly. And he had hit her because he’d known he had to. Garret wouldn’t have been satisfied with anything less. Knowing he’d done what he had to do didn’t make it any easier to live with, though. The girl might have avoided being raped, but she would carry the fear with her for a long while before it faded. And he would carry the sound of her screams for the rest of his life.
Back aboard the ship he took a long shower, knowing it wouldn’t wash away the filth that cluttered his soul. He’d worked undercover far too long. He’d gone places and done things that he knew he’d never be able to forget. There were times, like today, that he was forced to act in ways that made him feel physically ill just so his cover wouldn’t be blown. What he’d done to the girl today had hardly been the worst act he’d ever committed in the name of his job. He sincerely hoped it would be the last time he ever had to cross that line, though. He’d been ready to get out before this assignment came up. He’d have turned it down if it wasn’t for the fact that the agent Garret had killed had been someone Colin considered a friend. Hell, Charlie Cook was the closest thing to family Colin had. And Garret had killed him. They didn’t know much about precisely how he’d died. There hadn’t been enough left of his body to make that deter
mination. The one thing they did know was that Garret had pitched his body over the side of the ship. The current pulled him straight under and into the propellers. Colin had spent a lot of time praying that Charlie had been dead before he went over the railing.
There’d been no witness, no clues. There was no doubt that Garret Palmer was responsible, though. Charlie’s last report had indicated that he worried Palmer was getting suspicious of him. Obviously, he was right. Palmer hadn’t even slowed his illegal activities down. In fact, all the indications were that he was more active than he’d ever been. There were all kinds of theories about why. Colin worried that it might mean he was getting ready to disappear. One final big job and he’d vanish without a trace. He had the money and resources to make it happen. If he succeeded Colin knew no one would ever see him again. He’d change his appearance and name and start over somewhere else. Colin had no intention of letting that happen. He was going to bring Garret Palmer down hard, along with as many of his associates as he could find. Whatever it took, Palmer was going to pay for Charlie’s death.
Something had happened. Claire could feel it as surely as she could feel the texture of the cloth napkin she had gripped in her fist. For the past days she and Colin had spent every morning together. They’d talked about all kinds of things, and she believed she’d gotten to know him quite well. She certainly knew him well enough to recognize that there was a new kind of tension about him tonight. That wasn’t the only thing that had changed, though. It was evident that whatever had happened had somehow brought him and Garret closer together. They’d appeared to have a casual friendship before, but tonight it was obvious that their relationship had gotten tighter.
It made her uncomfortable. She didn’t particularly care for Garret’s arrogance. She didn’t really understand how he and Colin could be friends. They were nothing alike. Then again, Colin never quite seemed to act the same at dinner as he did when they were alone together in the mornings. He didn’t exactly ignore her, but he made no effort to pay her any special attention. She was smart enough to guess that he might be playing a role for Garret’s benefit. She had trouble believing that he was so insecure that he felt it necessary to pretend to be something he wasn’t just to gain Garret’s approval, though. Colin never appeared to be insecure about anything. Which left her with a lot of uncertainty and no easy answers.
She’d been wondering about the differences in Colin when he was with her and when everyone else was around. He was certainly behaving like a different person tonight. He’d drunk more than she’d ever seen him drink before, and he and Garret kept sending each other speaking looks and smug smiles. When Garret finally shoved away from the table and said he was off to the casino, Colin rose to go with him. Claire watched the pair go, feeling another strange twinge of unease as Garret said something that made Colin laugh. The two men couldn’t be that much alike. They just couldn’t.
CHAPTER FIVE
Colin was late meeting her the next morning. She kept telling herself that he’d never verbally promised to keep their morning dates, but she couldn’t help feeling uneasy when the minutes kept ticking by without any sign of him. When he finally appeared, the sigh of relief that poured out of her was much too profound for comfort. A few minutes late and she’d instantly begun to worry that he was tired of her. Worse, the thought of him ending their morning routine hurt her in ways that she knew she shouldn’t allow it to. She was much too attached to him already, but she couldn’t bear the thought of ending the relationship. She desperately tried not to think about how foolish she was being.
Colin saw Claire’s relief as her eyes settled on him, and he instantly felt like a prick. She’d thought he was going to stand her up again, and the truth was, he’d thought about it. After yesterday, he knew he had to stop seeing her. She was getting too close, and it was starting to get in his way. The stakes were too high to risk that. He was also worried that she was much too observant. In her quiet way, she sat back and watched everyone and everything around her. Last night he’d practically felt her questions as he and Garret acted like they’d suddenly become best buddies. She was starting to notice that he acted like two different people, and that wasn’t something he could allow. He had to end it, now, before he was forced to do something really ugly just to get her out of the way. Her welcoming smile made his gut clench.
“Oversleep again?”
He couldn’t bring himself to even pretend to find the comment amusing. Her smile turned strained, then faded as her brows drew together.
“Colin, what’s wrong?”
He shook his head. “I think we should stop meeting like this.”
It was almost exactly the same thing he’d said to her that first morning they’d had breakfast together, but there was no doubt that he wasn’t being facetious now. Claire felt a denial come into her mind but couldn’t force it past the instant tightness in her throat. Colin shifted his gaze off her face for a moment, staring out at the horizon. He seemed to be gathering his thoughts, and Claire couldn’t make herself say a word to interrupt him. When he finally met her gaze again, the expression in his eyes made her want to cry.
“Look, you’re a great woman and everything, but I just don’t think it’s a good idea for us to keep seeing each other.”
She nodded and tightened her hands into fists, digging her fingernails into her palms in an effort to keep the tears from coming to her eyes. He saw them though, and the pity that filled his gaze made her want to scream in frustration.
“Aw, Claire-” She jerked back, shaking her head when he started to reach out and touch her.
“Don’t!” He stopped as she took a couple of unnaturally deep breaths in an effort to maintain her self-control. Somehow she managed make her voice sound something close to normal as she spoke, though she couldn’t bring herself to actually meet his gaze. “It’s okay, Colin. You don’t need to explain it to me. I know how things are.”
The pain in her voice ripped at his gut. “I very much doubt that.”
Her gaze jerked to his, and he saw a flash of defiance as she lifted her chin. “I’m not a naïve little fool, Colin. I’ve always known this friendship between us was transitory. I know very well that I’m not the kind of woman a man like you makes a habit of spending time with. I knew that sooner or later, you’d get bored with the aberration and put an end to it. Frankly, I’m surprised it took you this long.” She cleared her throat. “Anyway, there’s no reason to worry about me. I’ll be just fine. In fact, I’ve decided that I’m going to go ashore today. You know I haven’t left the ship since we left port and I figured I might as well go take in some of the local color while I have the chance. I should get back to my room and grab my things. I’m sure I’ll see you around later.”
She started to turn away and he reached out and caught her arm. When she turned to face him, he shook his head. “You don’t understand a damn thing.”
He jerked her forward and kissed her. Every rational bone in his body was screaming at him that he was going way over the line here, but he didn’t give a damn. The pain in her eyes was more than he could take. He couldn’t make himself let her leave, believing that he found her boring and undesirable. He had no doubt whatsoever that he’d regret his impulsiveness, but he wasn’t able to do it while she was in his arms. When he pushed at her teeth with his tongue she opened for him without hesitation. The tentative way she returned his kiss only fired his blood more. He knew damn well that she was thirty years old, and that was way too old for a woman to still be clinging to her innocence in this day and age. But knowing Claire the way he did, he knew it was entirely possible that she was still a virgin. He’d never considered that a particularly seductive trait since he generally liked the women he took to his bed to be experienced enough to know how to ask for what they liked and how to give him what he wanted as well. As he felt the way Claire trembled against him, though, he was forced to admit that her innocence aroused him to painful extremes. When he finally ended the kiss she sta
red up at him with wide, stunned eyes.
“I’m not ending our relationship because I find you boring. I’m ending it because I find you anything but boring. And believe me when I tell you that there’s no way in hell that anything good could ever come of it. You’re a woman who wants and deserves the kind of commitment I’m both unwilling and unable to make.” He shook his head. “I’m a rambler, Claire. I always have been, and I always will be. I don’t want either of us to make the mistake of thinking we could ever be anything more than friends. It would only lead to you getting hurt.”
Claire was too stunned to say anything at all. He was implying that he found her attractive. She nearly laughed out loud at the absurdity of it. What in the world could he find attractive about her? The mousy hair and almost flat chest? It had to be some kind of joke. Only he wasn’t laughing. He wasn’t even smiling. She shook her head.
“This is insane.”
His brows arched. “Why?”
“Because there’s no way you could want me.”
His mouth drew down into a frown. “I’d like to know who convinced you that you’re so undesirable. There’s nothing wrong with you, Claire, except your own self-image. You’re so obsessed with your imagined shortcomings that you don’t see the truth.” He ran his gaze over her. “You’re built like ninety percent of the models working the runways of every major fashion show in the world. You’ve got innate grace and more intelligence and charm than most of the women on this ship. All you need is a little self-confidence and some clothes that actually fit you, and you’d have men falling down at your feet.”
Her First Vacation Page 6