“Hey, Max.”
“Paul.”
I smiled. “Yea, you knew right, away didn’t you?” I asked.
He nodded. “Well… what other man would be with my brother?” he asked.
Danny looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die. “What’s that mean?” I asked.
He cocked his head to the side and gave me that look that I knew. He was like Danny in ways, but he had this cocky lady mans thing going on with him. If Max had been really interested in them back home and had the time… shit, Danny would’ve had fucking trouble. The little mother fucker always had swagger. “When Danny was leaving, I asked about you specifically. He told me to tell you he ran away, he ain’t want you to know. Then when I told you… you were devastated. I felt like I broke ya heart. I wanted to propose.”
I chuckled. “You’re still a little fuck, you knucklehead.”
He grinned. “One and only.” He shook his head. “Something like this… Joe wouldn’t bring anybody who wasn’t family.”
I warmed at that. They thought of me as their family? That felt real fucking good. “And I wouldn’t miss this for the world,” I admitted.
“So, I don’t get no love? This the second day you’ve been here, and you weren’t even going to say hi.” He mocked crying. “I’m heartbroken. I thought for sure you loved me more.” Then he pouted.
He looked so much like Danny, even fragile as he was. He was fucking adorable, and I still wanted to knock him upside the head as I’ve done so many times. “You lucky I can’t brain you.”
He stuck out his tongue. You see? Danny junior, got the balls to fuck with me. I got up and walked over to him and hugged him. An instant feeling of home took over me, and the emotions that came along with it was almost too much.
“So… did you guys make it official? I don’t think I saw any rings.” Max said.
Danny groaned. “Not you too.” He muttered.
Max frowned, “huh?” he asked.
He shook his head. “Nothing.” He sighed. “So why isn’t Jenny here?”
Max turned sheepish. “She doesn’t know.”
Danny frowned. “What the hell do you mean she doesn’t know. You said you’ve been sick for the past year.” He was pissed.
Max got defensive. “Oh please, save it. You would’ve done the same! If she had known, she wouldn’t be in school right now. She would be here trying to take care of me and for what? To give me an extra month? Losing out on her life? NO! it wasn’t worth it. A month more of mine wasn’t worth the rest of hers.” He was getting emotional.
Danny softened. “But Max, you can’t just do that. She deserves to know. As does Angie. How would you have all felt to find out later in life that I just died and had the chance to tell you, see you before I did but chose not to? You said my leaving for Ang tore everyone apart… but I was still alive! What do you think this will do?”
Max broke on a sob, and I felt the intense need to leave the room. I felt their pain deep inside me, and I don’t deal well with my own emotions. “Ok Joey, but can you… can you call her?” Max asked.
Danny nodded. “Yea.” He looked over at me worried, he didn’t seem like he wanted to either.
I sighed. “How about I call her. I’ll just ask her to come out here.”
“Thank you,” Danny whispered.
I got her phone number and walked out the room. I still felt like I was suffocating a bit, so I decided to go outside for some fresh air. I dialed her, and she answered on the third ring.
“Hello?”
“Jennifer?” I asked.
“This is she.” She sounded so much more mature than I remembered.
“This is Ta – Paul.”
I could hear her confusion. “Paul?”
“Yes…”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t know a Paul.” She answered. I’m not going to lie, I was getting annoyed. Fuck she mean she don’t know me?
“What is it with you and your Goddamn siblings lately? Between you, Ang, Max, and damn Joe I’m going – “
I was cut off with a gasp. “Joey?” she asked. I gave her a minute… I understood the need. It was like a ghost coming back from the dead. “Paul. Oh my God.”
“Hey, pretty girl…” I teased her. I knew she had a small crush on me when she was younger. I was always happy that she wasn’t like those fast bitches and would’ve tried to make a move on me or something. That would have been some real fucked up awkward shit.
“You said, Joey.” I knew that would be what she latched onto.
“Yea. He’s here. We’re visiting Max in Pennsylvania. Come.” Straight to the point, right?
“I can rent a car and be there in a few hours. I’ll see you soon, I have to get ready.” Then she was gone. I could hear the excitement in her voice, too bad it won’t last.
I was heading back inside when the sound of a bike caught my attention. I missed my baby, that’s for sure. I was surprised to see Rip pulling up with Ang on the back, followed by Trip and Misty, and pulling up the back was Psycho’s cage.
I waited until they all got out and Psycho immediately came to me and pulled me into a man hug. I laughed. “Man, I’m not the one who needs a hug,” I said, but I really appreciated it.
He searched my face. “You shouldn’t be so sure about that. I know that’s your family too.” He patted my shoulder twice and put some space between us. “We’re here for you guys, bro.” Fuck. This supportive moment wasn’t exactly helping to keep my emotions in check.
“Where are they?” Angie asked.
“I’ll show you.”
We got curious stares as we all entered the hospital and made our way to Max’s room. Angie tore through the group and burst through the door startling both Max and Danny. She threw herself at Max who flinched in pain upon contact.
“Easy Ang. You can’t be so rough.” Danny admonished.
She blushed and eased off of Max. Max touched her face as he looked at her shocked. “You’re here… you came.”
“I did… oh Max, what’s wrong?” She asked worriedly.
“I’m sick, I’m dying,” Max said simply.
Angie immediately started crying, and Rip was right there to comfort her. I frowned, it would appear I needed to have another talk with Rip real fucking soon. When he held her, Max frowned and seemed to just realize the additional people in the room.
Max looked over to Danny. “Who the hell is that?” he asked pointing a thumb at Rip.
Danny chuckled. “He’s from the club. Seems like he’s been looking out for Ang a bit for some time.”
His frown deepened. “I don’t like this. Why’s he touching her?” Max turned to Rip. “Hey, stop touching my sister.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. Psycho was snickering behind me like a damn child. Rip released her and put his hands up in surrender. “I don’t mean nothing by it.” He said.
Max shrugged. “I don’t care. Don’t touch her.” His gaze swung to Angie. “Don’t think because I’m sick that shit is going to fly. You know the rules… no boys.” He turned to Danny. “What are you letting happen?”
Danny was smiling from ear to ear. “Don’t worry. Me and Tank got an eye on him. He knows better.”
“Tank?” he asked.
Danny rolled his eyes. “Oh yeah, that’s what this one goes by now.” He said jerking a thumb in my direction.
Psycho stepped up. “I’m Sy. We’re just here to support family.”
Max nodded. “Are you watching this one too?” he asked referring to Rip.
Psycho smiled. “Yea, I’ll keep an eye on him. I’ll knock him out if he tries anything.”
“Good lord.” Angie groaned.
“Hey, I haven’t even done anything, and you’re all plotting against me. How is this fair?” Rip asked.
Max was really having none of it. He shrugged. “Life ain’t fair, suck it up and get over it.”
Light conversation continued throughout the day. Max was hell-bent on giving Rip a h
ard time. When he found out that Angie got there on the back of his bike, I thought he was going to strangle him. Danny found the whole thing amusing and just enjoyed being with his family.
Eventually, everyone cleared out to give us privacy and went to check into the same hotel where Danny and I were staying. Danny took Angie to grab some snacks leaving Max and me alone in the room.
“Paul?”
I looked over at him. “What’s up?” I asked as I walked over to his bed.
He gestured to the chair that Danny has been occupying and I sat. “So, Tank huh?” he asked.
I grinned. “Yea, I guess so.”
He nodded. “Badass, I like it.”
I shrugged. “I try.”
He sighed. “I’m so happy that he found you… or you found him. Joe needs you.” He said.
I wasn’t expecting this talk. “I need him too.”
He nodded. “I know. I just was wondering if you can promise me something?” he asked hesitantly.
I was wary, but I went for it. This was Max, I’d do anything for the little shit head. “Sure.”
“Promise me that you’re going to take care of him… of them. I know that Joey went through some bad things. I don’t know what exactly, and I don’t think I really want to know. My guesses are already too much. I think… I think I can die in peace now if I know that you’re going to be there for them.”
It felt like I had something stuck in my throat and my eyes burned. “I promise.” I croaked.
He nodded. “And make sure they stay together. The last few years have been bad, us all being separated. They need each other too.”
That one was a punch in the gut. “Yea, I know.” My voice was raspy, and my palms were sweaty.
The door opened, and I released a breath, happy for the interruption. In the doorway was Jenny. Blonde hair pulled up into a messy ponytail. Her grey eyes so much like their mothers sparkling. Her eyes landed on Max, and she ran over. “Max, what is going on?” she asked running her hands all over him like she was checking for injuries.
He chuckled. “You don’t have to molest me, Jen, I’m sick… I wasn’t hit by a truck.”
She frowned. “Don’t go making jokes! I’m serious.”
He sighed. “Not right now. I will tell you, but I feel a little exhausted.”
She sighed and put her stuff down. “Fine, but you will be explaining.” She said.
She turned, I think looking for a seat when she noticed me. When she looked at me, I grinned and winked at her, and she blushed. She walked over to me hesitantly.
“Paul…”
“Hey, beautiful,” I said pulling her into a hug.
She slapped my arm. “Stop teasing me.”
I laughed. “I’m surprised it still works after all this time.”
She pulled back and rolled her eyes. “You’re annoying, do you know that?”
I shrugged. “I’ve been told.”
Angie and Danny walked back into the room. As if she knew, Jenny’s head spun around, and she ran and literally jumped on Danny. He fell back and would’ve hit the floor if he hadn’t been so close to the wall.
“JOEY!” she squealed.
She sounded just like she used to when she would get out of school and see him there waiting to take her home. “Hey, Jenny.” He greeted her laughing.
I took my spot in a corner and began playing games on my phone as they all caught up with each other and the situation. We all went back to the hotel when visiting hours was over, and I let Danny share our room with the girls, and I went to crash with Psycho.
As soon as I walked in the door, he stopped me. “What’s wrong?”
I dropped down on the sofa. “What the fuck, are you psychic or some shit now?” I asked annoyed.
He scoffed. “I can just read you is all.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. “It’s just something that Max said to me today. He was saying how they needed each other and to stay together and I feel like I’m going to lose Danny.”
Psycho frowned. “Why would you think that?”
“Jenny goes to Cornell, so I don’t see her moving in where we are. Plus, Max has a little girl that lives out here, and she only knows Jenny. I would imagine if anything they’re all going to follow her. It makes the most sense, and I can’t… I can’t leave the club.” I confessed. It has been weighing on my shoulders the whole fucking day, and it felt good to say it.
Psycho shook his head. “Don’t jump the gun. You don’t know what’s going to happen… just take it a day at a time, and you’ll deal with it when the time comes. Worrying about it right now is just gonna make you crazy. And whether or not Danny will stay doesn’t matter right now because he’s gonna need you. Max looks like he’s got hours or maybe a couple of days left. When that happens, he’s going to need you and you ain’t gonna be worth shit if you get lost in your head.”
I plopped back and groaned. “I fucking hope you’re right.”
Chapter 16
Danny
It felt good to have everyone back in my life at once, it just hurts that it’s because I was losing someone.
It’s been three days, and I knew that we were going to lose Max at any moment. He can barely stay awake, and the fight in him is gone. I don’t know if having everyone back helped him let go, but something in him changed. He seemed content, ready.
Tank has been here at every turn physically, but I’m not so sure mentally. He comes to the hospital but checks out and sits in the corner until its time to go and he’ll drive us back to the hotel, and I won’t see him for the rest of the night. He’s been crashing with Psycho, who had to go back home this morning and I’m not sure what to make of it.
I felt bad for not addressing what he may or may not be going through, but I had bigger things on my hands. I couldn’t worry about Tank and Max at the same time. Max would only be here for a bit longer, and then I could focus on Tank.
Hell, I still haven’t been able to address the Gabby situation. What the fuck was we supposed to do with her? Jenny made the most sense since she knew her, but she was in school. There was no way she could take a five-year-old with her. Then Angie was going through… something I still haven’t been able to figure out. I’m struggling to get my damn self together, and then I was living with Tank. As far as I’m concerned, neither of us knew whether we wanted them, and I don’t think we were ready for something like that. If I had to take on the responsibility, there’s no guarantee that Tank will be ok with it.
Jenny stays on campus, but when she’s not in school, she stays with Max. I spoke to her about that too and asked if now she’d stay with me. Yet, another thing I haven’t spoken to Tank about. We already have Ang with us. It doesn’t seem like much of a burden right now because she’s been hopping around between staying with Sia for some female companionship, us, and at the club. It was a lot at once.
When I got back to Max’s room after lunch, I knew. His breathing was shallow, and he could barely open his eyes. We all gathered around his bed, and each said our goodbyes. Twenty minutes later, the machine let us know that Max was gone.
I had to keep it together, and I held Jenny as she grieved, and Tank helped Angie. When we got back to the room, they cried for hours, and I had to be grateful for Tank’s presence helping me with them. Once they cried themselves to sleep somewhere around ten at night, I got in the shower.
I turned the water onto scolding hot and just stood under the spray hoping that it would wash all my worries away. I can’t say when it started, it seemed to have snuck up on me, but all I knew was that all of the stress and pain swept through me and I’d dropped to my knees. I couldn’t tell which drops were from the shower or my eyes, but it felt like they could all be coming from me.
Strong arms wrapped around me and pulled me up. Tank was still fully dressed but was in the shower with me.
“Shhh.” He said as he rubbed my back and held me close.
I couldn’t stop crying though, and his gentleness
only made me cry harder. He held me until I had no tears left and my throat was sore. When I’d stopped, he pulled me out of the shower and dried me off before taking me into the living room. He got us both something to put on and laid down on the couch with me on top of him.
“Feeling a little better?” he finally asked.
“Yea, I think the crying helped.”
He kissed my head and nodded. “That’s good.”
I took a deep breath. “Tank, what am I going to do?” I asked.
“We’ll figure it out.”
“Tank, there’s the girls now… all three of them. Jenny can’t take his daughter with her to school. I’m going to – I’m going to have to take her.” I gulped. “I need to know if that’s too much for you. There’s no way I can put her up for adoption or into the system. She’s Max’s.”
Tank paused, and I instantly felt his wall go up. “I – “he began, but I wasn’t ready for rejection.
“We don’t have to talk about it now. But, I have to work things out with Jenny too. She’s on campus but she still technically lived with Max. She needs to move as well, and I just have to figure out what I’m going to do with them.” I rambled.
I got off of him and stretched. The last thing I wanted to do was leave the comfort of his arms, but I wasn’t ready to talk. I was afraid that once we had the talk, I was going to lose something and right now I couldn’t take losing anything else.
I was the last person to wake up the next morning. There was a huge platter of untouched food that was ordered from room service. Angie and Jenny both looked like the walking dead and were quietly drinking coffee each lost in their own heads.
I looked around the room and frowned. “Where’s Tank?” I asked.
Angie shrugged. “He wasn’t on the couch when I woke up, and the food was already here.”
That was odd. I fixed me some coffee and joined them in silence. It was going to take us a long while to get over all of this.
Two hours later, Tank came into the room, and none of us had barely moved or spoke the whole time. He looked at each and every one of us, and I could see the worry in his eyes. He stared at me for a bit, and I would’ve given anything to know what he was thinking. He looked troubled, and that scared me.
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