Come Home, Cowboy

by Cathy McDavid

  Cara put an arm around her friend.

  Summer sniffed. “I’m the one who should be comforting you.”

  “Even if I wanted a second chance with Josh, I don’t think he’d give me one.” She might not deserve one after the horrible way she’d treated him.

  “You don’t know if you don’t try.” Summer smiled through her tears. “And I’ll hate you if you don’t.”

  Cara didn’t answer. She couldn’t.

  “Cara!” Summer exclaimed. “Do you want to be lonely your whole life?”

  “No. But I’m not like that. Impulsive.”

  “Oh, sweetie. What if, just this once, you were?”

  Cara went over to Wind Walker and patted his head. The horse nuzzled her arm. Feeling a soft sensation on her other arm, she turned.

  Teddy’s hand rested slightly above her wrist.

  Summer stared in astonishment. “He’s touching you.”

  Teddy spoke. “Jah, Jah.”

  Josh. Of course. It seemed everyone, including Teddy, was championing him.

  Summer laughed. “Who are you to argue with an eight-year-old?”

  * * *

  CARA SPENT FOUR full days diligently not thinking about her conversation with Summer. Her friend was wrong. Josh didn’t want to get back together and had clearly moved on. Otherwise he’d approach her, right? Make an effort. Break the ice.

  Except why would he? She was the one who’d insisted on ending their fledgling romance. The one who’d gotten cold feet.

  “Stupid, stupid, stupid,” she said, unsure if she was summing up her actions or calling herself a name. Both, perhaps.

  At least she’d stopped ducking around corners every time Josh came within glimpsing distance. And her appetite had returned. Somewhat. Enough that Raquel no longer pestered her. Cara almost missed the constant reminder.

  “Time heals all wounds,” she said, searching her jacket pocket for keys and making her way to her Jeep.

  Did it? Then why wasn’t she healed? For a while, she’d thought it possible. When she’d spent the night wrapped in Josh’s arms and they’d shared their feelings as comfortably as any established couple.

  Then she’d gone and messed it all up.

  If she believed that, it stood to reason she must also believe she and Josh had something worthwhile. Something too precious to lose.

  “Stupid!”

  Which was worse? Ending things with Josh, or not going after him as Summer had suggested?

  Cara was tired of the endless questions and the endless circles her mind kept running in. Either she spoke to Josh and tested the waters or she forgot about him entirely.

  Starting the engine, she shoved the Jeep into first gear and accelerated. Rather than ride by horseback to the far east corner of the mustang sanctuary, she’d driven. Yesterday, she’d returned the mare and foal to this section, where she pastured pregnant mares and those with foals. It was Cara’s belief horses thrived better when kept with others, similar to how they once existed in the wild.

  The drive back to the ranch passed quickly, the Jeep bouncing and bumping over deep ruts carved in the dirt road after the recent rains. Weeds and other low-growing vegetation had sprouted seemingly overnight and lined both sides of the road. Soon they’d be knee-high.

  Entering the ranch by the back way, she headed straight to the horse stable and parked in her usual spot next to the supply shed.

  Another Sunday afternoon. Two weeks since Nathan’s fall and Cara’s emotional crash and burn. And like most Sundays at the ranch, a lazy atmosphere prevailed. Family and workers were resting, pursuing recreational pastimes, off visiting friends or relatives or running errands. Cara alone worked.

  She no sooner stepped out of the Jeep than her gaze traveled to the round pen as if pulled by a strong magnet. Josh was there. She spotted his tall frame and familiar cowboy hat through the railings. Hurry Up was in the pen with him and so were the children. She knew that because she could hear Nathan’s gleeful chatter.

  Go. That was her first inclination, and it was a powerful one. Cara didn’t, however. She stayed, resisting the pull for as long as possible. Eventually she strolled toward the pen, her feet deciding for her.

  “Come on, buddy,” Josh said. “Cooperate, will you?”

  He’d put Nathan in the saddle atop Hurry Up. As always, the small horse stood quiet. Nathan was the one moving. He wiggled and fidgeted and complained.

  “I wanna ride.”

  “You will. As soon as you let me take a picture of you and your sister.” Josh stood beside the small horse, Kimberly in one arm and his phone in the other hand. At his feet, the puppy dug sat in the dirt, then yipped and shot sideways, stumbling over its own front feet. “Come on, Nathan. I promised your mother I’d send her some pictures of you and your sister.”

  With everything his ex-wife had done, and done to him, Josh continued to send her pictures of the children. There were plenty who wouldn’t be so kind and considerate. Plenty who wouldn’t recognize how a simple picture could provide enough inspiration and hope to get a person through the day.

  Finally, Nathan sat still long enough for Josh to place Kimberly in front of him in the saddle. Retrieving the puppy, he deposited it in Kimberly’s arms. At once, it licked her face. She burst into baby laughter.

  “One, two, three, smile.” Josh took a step back and held up the phone, snapping several more shots.

  By now, Cara was close enough to see the big grins the children wore. The pictures would be adorable. What Cara wouldn’t give for a copy.

  Josh, or perhaps Raquel, had dressed the children for the pictures. Kimberly wore overalls, and Nathan jeans, boots and a child-size cowboy hat. A string under his chin held the hat in place. He looked like a miniature version of his father.

  Cara had done that with Javier, dressed him in cowboy clothes.

  She stopped in front of the railing, waiting for the grief and the guilt to assail her as it always did. The emotions came...then went. Not in a rush, but rather like a soft breeze disappearing over the next rise.

  They’d return, she was sure of it. But something told her each time would be less harsh until the memories of Javier became something she cherished. Not painful reminders. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?

  “Ride, Daddy, please.” Nathan swung his feet in an entirely ineffectual attempt to get the horse moving.

  “One second.” Josh removed the puppy from Kimberly’s grasp and set it on the ground. Her cry of protest dissolved into a whimper of complaint.

  Nap time was Cara’s first thought. Kimberly always whimpered like that when she was tired.

  “Hold on to your sister,” Josh said. Only when Nathan had a firm grip on Kimberly did he cluck to the horse. They started slow and went no faster, the puppy rollicking behind them.

  With a less dependable horse and someone less attentive in charge, there might have been cause for concern. Not with Hurry Up and Josh.

  He didn’t see her until the end of their first circuit. Their gazes locked, and he drew up short. Hurry Up automatically stopped. The puppy did, too. Finding something interesting, he began digging in the dirt.

  “Hi.” It was Cara who spoke first.

  Nathan, not Josh, answered her. “Cara!” He raised his arms above his head, fingers splayed. “We riding Hurry Up.”

  “I see. But you’d better hold on to your sister so she doesn’t fall.”

  The boy obediently hugged Kimberly and squeezed. She squealed in protest, making an unhappy face.

  Josh had yet to say a single word. She supposed her unexpected appearance had taken him by surprise.

  “I got a puppy,” Nathan gushed.

  “I see.” Her knees weakened, and she grabbed the top railing with both hands to steady herself. “What’s his nam
e?”

  “Trouble.”

  “Cute. Did your dad name him after you?”

  Nathan giggled.

  Wait. Was that a twinkle in Josh’s eyes?

  Finally he spoke. “What’s up?”

  She considered his tone, deciding it was cautiously friendly. Better than cool and distant.

  “Want me to take a picture of the three of you?”

  “That’s all right. I’m sending these to Trista. She probably wouldn’t appreciate me being included.”

  His tone contained the barest trace of humor.

  “For you,” Cara clarified. “Don’t you want a copy for yourself?”

  His brows rose. After a pause, he activated his phone’s camera and passed it to her through the railing.

  A minute later, six new pictures were saved to his phone. Josh’s features relaxed as he viewed the images, swiping his finger across the display screen.

  “Thanks.” He pocketed the phone, not offering to take one of her and the children.

  What did she expect?

  “Daddy, wanna ride.”

  “Don’t let me keep you,” Josh said. He made three more circuits before Cara turned and walked away. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He must think she was an idiot.

  “Wait.”

  She stopped but didn’t turn around.

  This was no game. She needed to be 100 percent certain he wanted to give them another shot and to say as much out loud.

  A lot was at stake. She’d realized that seeing the pictures on his phone. The longing to be included in those shots was a physical ache, almost as intense as the pain she’d endured when Javier died.

  Why not? Both were terrible losses.

  “If you’re free later...” Josh let the sentence drop.

  Cara swallowed. She needed more from him, not just an inquiry about whether she happened to be free.

  “What, Josh?”

  “We could talk.”

  “About?”

  “I made a mistake. I should have been more patient with you.” He cleared his throat. “You made a mistake, too. You should have admitted your fears, talked to me like a grown-up. Instead, you lashed out at me.”

  That made her turn around. At the sight of his smiling face, her annoyance vanished.

  “Come with me,” he said. “Up to the apartment. It’s past time for the kids’ naps. I’ll put them to bed.”

  “And then?”

  “We have that talk.”

  She still wasn’t sure.

  “Cara!” Nathan started kicking his feet again. “Read Rabbit and Fox.”

  “Okay.” She walked to the gate and unlocked it.

  Josh didn’t take his eyes off her. “You accept his offer, but not mine?”

  “He made a better one.”

  “Bested by a two-year-old.” Josh chuckled and led Hurry Up through the gate. “Come on. Help me unsaddle.”

  “No, let me take Kimberly to the apartment.” Cara lifted the little girl by the waist. “She’s tired.”

  Nathan protested. “Me, too. Take me.”

  “Sorry, buddy.” Josh patted his son’s leg. “She can only manage one of you at a time.”

  “Nooooo!”

  “It’s all right,” Cara insisted.

  “Are you sure?” Josh seemed to be asking her something other than whether she was willing to take Nathan.

  “Yes.” She was. Very sure. “Come on, mijo.” To Josh, she said, “See you shortly.”

  Kimberly was asleep by the time Cara opened the door. After changing both children, she laid Kimberly down in her crib and covered her with a blanket. In the living room, she sat on the couch, Nathan cuddled by her side, his favorite book open on her lap.

  They weren’t halfway through the book when he nodded off. Cara had just put him to bed and Josh returned. A thrill wound through her at the sound of his steps crossing to the kitchen. Closing the bedroom door behind her, she made her way to him. He was fixing hot chocolate. Without a word, she sat at the dining table.

  He placed the mug in front of her. “Kids asleep?”

  “Out like lights.”

  “Good.” He lowered himself into the chair beside her. “You first.”

  “Me?” She stared at him over the rim of her mug.

  “You have more to say.”

  Perhaps she did. “You’d think with all the counseling I’ve had, I’d be better at understanding myself and communicating my feelings.”

  “It’s not always easy.”

  “No. But you’re an easy guy to talk to. That’s something I’ve always liked about you and found...attractive.”

  “And here I thought it was my good looks.”

  “There is that.” His smile encouraged her to continue. “I told you once before, I’m broken, and it’s going to take time before I’m fixed, if ever.” She held up a hand when he would have replied, afraid she might lose her nerve. “The difference between now and before is that I want to be fixed. I want to feel happiness bubbling up inside me every time we kiss and not think it’s a betrayal of Javier.”

  “You deserve to be happy again, Cara.”

  “I don’t know if deserve is the right word, but I’d like to be happy again. I’ll always have regrets, and I’ll always have bad days. They don’t need to run one into the other anymore.”

  “You also don’t have to face them alone.”

  “I do have my family.”

  “I was referring to me.”

  Her heart beat faster. “I was wrong, thinking I needed to push people away. Being with you, with Nathan and Kimberly, has made me stronger. Not weaker.”

  “I’m glad to hear you say that, because my intentions are to be with you a lot.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Very.” He reached for her hand.

  She brought it to her face and pressed his knuckles to her cheek, a gentle sensation washing over her. “You didn’t see Raquel and your father together. Trust me when I tell you, what they had was special.”

  “What we have is special, too.”

  She happened to agree.

  Returning their linked hands to the table, she said, “We’re exclusive.”

  “Goes without saying.”

  “This isn’t casual, either. We date for the long haul, with the intention of seeing where this can lead.”

  He grinned at her. “Ground rules.”

  She liked the way his eyes softened. “Too much?”

  “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He tugged on her hand, pulling her toward him. “Are there more, or can I kiss you now?”

  “Much as I adore the children, we have a date night once a week—”

  “Shut up.” He wrapped a strong hand around her neck and drew her to him.

  Their lips met. The kiss was incredible, but then, weren’t they always? She’d thought at first it was him and his skill. She knew now it was the two of them together and the wonderful combination of their hearts meeting and joining.

  It was too soon to tell for sure, but Cara thought the wild emotion sailing through her just might be love. Of the variety that lasted a lifetime. The idea no longer scared her. Instead, she couldn’t wait to see what tomorrow brought. Heck, she couldn’t wait for the next few minutes.

  As the kiss continued, she felt the shattered pieces of her life mending, and her difficult past give way to a bright new future.

  Epilogue

  One month later

  “Congratulations.” Josh shook Gabe’s hand. “Best of luck to you, man. You got yourself a good one.”

  His brother startled him by pulling him into a back-slapping hug. In the five months since he’d returned to Mustang Valley and Dos Estrellas,
this was their first. Things had obviously changed.

  He needed only to look at Cara to realize that. She sat on the couch with Kimberly between her legs, helping the little girl “walk” as she held on to the edge of the coffee table. Nathan, on the move as usual, ran in circles around the room, tapping the legs of guests in his own version of tag. Cara watched him with a smile on her face.

  Josh hated leaving the task of minding the kids to her, but they adored her and chose her company over his whenever they were all together. He didn’t blame them. He enjoyed her company, too, especially when they were alone.

  “We set a date.” Reese appeared beside Gabe and took his arm. “November fifteenth.”

  Gabe had made their engagement official with a proposal two weeks ago. Raquel was beyond excited and had immediately insisted on throwing a fiesta to celebrate. Between the two families and all their friends, the house was packed. She’d spent three full days preparing the food.

  Reese’s father had insisted on supplying the beverages. He sat in a leather chair by the side table, enjoying the attention and looking better than he had in weeks.

  The one person not appearing to enjoy himself was Cole. He stood in a corner, nursing a glass of champagne and talking hardly at all. Josh didn’t know what was bothering his brother. Maybe he was missing the rodeo circuit and wanted to go home. Josh made a mental note to spend some time with Cole and get to the bottom of his recent discontent.

  “Interesting day for a wedding. The fifteenth,” Josh said and exchanged glances with Gabe. It was the day they’d had the reading of his late father’s will, when Reese showed up at the ranch and announced she was the trustee for the estate.

  Gabe shrugged. “The calves should be born by then.”

  Reese laughed brightly and gave him a playful swat. “Leave it to him to pick a day that coincides with ranch business.”

  Nathan squealed. Typical for him, he’d tripped and face-planted on the living room floor.

  “Be right back.” Josh reached his son one second ahead of Cara. He lifted Nathan and set him on his feet. “Be careful, buddy.”