Diamonds and Dust

by Jessie Evans

  “Please, Mama,” she said, wadding the doll clothes as she clasped her fingers under her chin. “I promise to be so good everyone will think I’m an angel come down from heaven. Just please, please, please let me go to camp.”

  “We’ll talk about this outside,” Tulsi said, circling one hand as she prepared to herd Clementine out the door, needing to get them both away from Pike ASAP.

  “You’re going to say no!” Clem moaned, tears rising in her eyes. “I can tell you are!”

  Tulsi sighed, realizing her attempts to take the conversation somewhere more private were futile. “If I say yes, you have to promise not to run off while you’re there. You stay with the counselors and the other girls in your cabin. Do you understand me?”

  Clementine nodded vigorously.

  “And it’s church camp, so no taking the name of the Lord in vain, and no ‘flipping,’” Tulsi added with a hard look. “Everyone will know what you’re really meaning to say and they will be shocked.”

  “You say flipping,” Clem said, her bottom lip pushing out.

  “I am a grown up!” Tulsi shook her head in frustration. “Honestly, Clementine, how many times do we need to have this conversation? You are six, not sixteen. If you can’t remember that, you’re going to be in trouble once school starts. Your teacher won’t put up with the attitude.”

  “I know, I know. You’re right.” Clementine said, backtracking now that it was obvious Tulsi had started to lose her temper. “I’m sorry, Mama.” Clem ran across the room and threw her arms around Tulsi’s waist. “I’ll be good, cross my heart and hope to die. Just please let me go. It’s all I ever wanted in my whole entire life.”

  Tulsi sighed as she smoothed her hand over Clem’s silky hair, her daughter’s hug melting her anger the way it always did. “All right, drama queen,” she said softly. “Let’s get going. Hopefully, the bus hasn’t left without you.”

  “Can I bring Monster Princess’s clothes, too?” Clem asked, already shoving them into the open duffel near Tulsi’s hip. “I know they said no toys, but these aren’t toys, they’re accessories.”

  “Fine. But we need to go with a capital G.” Tulsi turned to Pike, pulse pounding all over again as their eyes met. “Thanks for keeping an eye on her.”

  “No problem,” he said, the warmth in his voice making her chest ache. “It was nice to meet the infamous Clementine. Mia’s told me so much about her.”

  “Bye, Mr. Pike,” Clem called, waving as she pulled Tulsi toward the door. “We can hang out more when I get back from camp. We’ll play poker for candy so make sure you stock up.”

  “I’ll be looking forward to it.” Pike grinned at Clementine before shifting his gaze to Tulsi, his smile remaining firmly in place. “See you around, Tuls. Don’t be a stranger.”

  “Oh-okay,” Tulsi stammered.

  She fought the urge to frown until she and Clem were back outside, but as soon as the shop’s front door closed behind them, her brows snapped together like opposite sides of a magnet. What the heck was that? That smile? That easy, breezy smile that made it seem like Tulsi was just an old friend Pike was glad to run into while he was back in town? What had happened to the pain and loathing from yesterday? Had she imagined it or read something personal into an unrelated foul mood?

  Tulsi shook her head as she and Clem hustled down the sidewalk toward the bus. No, she hadn’t imagined it. Pike had practically glared a hole through her forehead. If looks could kill, she would have been lying beside the road, bleeding from multiple stare wounds.

  So what had changed? What had happened between last night and this morning to banish the loathing in Pike’s eyes?

  “I have to talk to Mia,” Tulsi mumbled, tugging her phone out of her jeans pocket.

  “What?” Clementine panted, out of breath from taking two steps for every one of Tulsi’s.

  “Nothing, baby.” Tulsi forced a smile as she tapped out a quick text to Mia asking her to give a call when she was up. “Just thinking out loud.”

  “Grandpa says only crazy people do that,” Clem said.

  Tulsi tucked her phone back into her pocket with a roll of her eyes. “Grandpa has a lot of big opinions. That doesn’t mean they’re the truth.”

  Clementine nodded. “Opinions. Everyone’s got one.”

  Tulsi laughed. “Yes, but don’t say that at camp, either.”

  “Why?” Clementine asked. “It doesn’t have any bad words in it.”

  “I’ll explain when you get home,” Tulsi whispered as they neared the bus. All the other kids were on board, but the storage area beneath was still open, and two of the counselors were crossing the parking lot from the nearby drug store carrying flats of bottled water.

  “You found her!” Deb met them by the storage area under the bus as Tulsi tucked Clem’s duffel inside with the other bags.

  “Yes, thank goodness.” Tulsi put an arm around Clem’s shoulders, hugging her close. “She was at Mia’s looking for her doll. We found it, so she’s all set.”

  “Great!” Deb grinned down at Clem. “Hailey is saving you a seat. She’s so excited there are going to be two six-year-olds at camp this year. I bet you two are going to have the best time.”

  “We are!” Clem was prancing with excitement as she turned to give Tulsi one last hug. “Bye, Mom. Love you!”

  “Love you, too.” Tulsi hugged her daughter hard, holding on for as long as Clem would tolerate before setting her free. “Have fun, be good, and remember all the things we talked about.”

  “I will!” Clementine waved before dashing to the front of the bus and disappearing inside, sending a pang through Tulsi’s heart. She’d been so scared when Clem disappeared she’d forgotten how nervous she was about the camping trip until she watched her baby climb out of sight.

  “They’re going to be fine,” Deb whispered as they meandered a few steps away from the bus. “I know it’s scary, but Hailey and Clementine are both mature for their age. They’re going to have a wonderful time and make amazing memories.”

  “I know. And Clem’s so excited to go.” Tulsi tried to smile, but couldn’t seem to get her brows to unfurrow. This entire morning had been too upsetting to snap back so easily. “She’s just so little. My mom didn’t let me go to camp until I was in third grade.”

  “They’re growing up faster than we did,” Deb agreed with a sigh. “But I’ve heard Mrs. Grier expects so much of her first graders. Gaining some independence will probably be good for them.”

  Tulsi nodded. “I’ve been trying to prepare Clem all summer. My friend Mia and I had Mrs. Grier when we were little. Mia was so much like Clem and she got in trouble all the time. Mrs. Grier has a zero free spirit tolerance policy.”

  Deb cringed. “That’s what I’ve heard. It makes me wish there was another option. A parish school or a private school or something.”

  “One of the hazards of a small town,” Tulsi said with a shrug. “At least we’ll all be in it together.”

  “That’s true,” Deb said, lifting an arm to wave as the bus rumbled to life.

  “Bye!” Tulsi called out, laughing as Clem made a silly face through the window before the bus pulled out onto the street. “That girl. What am I going to do without her for an entire week?”

  “Start with getting a coffee with me?” Deb said, with a nervous laugh. “I have the morning off from the office. I know you have tons of friends, but even after a year and a half I haven’t quite found my tribe. If you know what I mean.”

  “Of course, and I do,” Tulsi said, sympathizing immediately and feeling bad that she hadn’t been the one to reach out. “It can be so hard to make new friends once you’re a mom. We’re all so busy with work and—”

  An alarm blared from her back pocket and Tulsi scrambled for her phone. “Sorry, it’s my friend Mia. I’ll just be a second.”

  “No worries.” Deb smiled as Tulsi stepped away.

  “You poor thing,” Mia said by way of greeting. “What a turd Clementine is! I can’t
believe she ran off like that. Pike said you were white as a sheet when you came in the shop.”

  “I was really scared,” Tulsi admitted, wondering what else Pike had said about her. “But we had a talk and I got her on the bus before it left. Hopefully, she’ll behave herself at camp.”

  Mia snorted. “Well, we can always hope. I don’t think she can get into too much trouble, as long as they lock up all the archery equipment.”

  “Oh, God,” Tulsi said, eyes squeezing shut. “Don’t say things like that, or I’m going to go chase down the bus.”

  Mia laughed. “Don’t chase down the bus. This will be good for her. She’s going to have an amazing time at camp and you’ll have an amazing time with me. I was just filling Pike in on all the activities planned for the week. He’s really, really excited about them. I can tell.”

  Tulsi made a noncommittal sound, wondering if Mia was being sarcastic, but too anxious that Pike might be listening in on the conversation to ask.

  “You want to come over and have coffee with us?” Mia continued. “Sawyer already left for work, and Pike and I are just sitting around until I open the shop.”

  “I would love to,” Tulsi lied. “But I’m having coffee with one of the other moms. But maybe you and I could meet up for lunch before my meeting? I’d love to pow-wow before I go to the Head Starts office.”

  “Sure,” Mia said. “I was going to close up from twelve thirty to one, does that work?”

  “That’s perfect. I’ll meet you at the diner for patty melts. My treat.”

  “Do you want this to be just us?” Mia asked. “Or is it okay if I bring Pike along if he hasn’t found something important to do with himself by then?”

  “I’d rather it be just you and me, if that’s okay,” Tulsi said, trying to keep her voice light. “I’m so nervous about the meeting, I don’t think I’m going to be very good company. I’d rather catch up with Pike when I’m not so stressed out.”

  “That’s fine. He doesn’t look like he’s chomping at the bit to horn in on the girl talk anyway. See you at twelve thirty, and try to enjoy your day off, okay? You deserve some fun after how hard you’ve been working.”

  “I’ll try. See you later.” Tulsi said her goodbyes and tucked her phone back into her jeans. After a brief debate on the virtues of quiche vs. eggs and bacon, she and Deb headed across the street to Tea for Two. Deb had decided on quiche, but Tulsi’s head was too busy swirling for her to care too much about breakfast. She couldn’t stop thinking about Pike’s easy smile—what it meant and if it even mattered.

  Whether he hated her or wanted to be friends, did it make a difference? No matter how much the stupidly forgiving part of her would like to have Pike in her life again—even as a friend, no matter how painful that would be—there was too much at stake. She’d gotten lucky this morning, but if Pike and Clem spent too much time together, sooner or later her luck was going to run out.

  And then her happy life in Lonesome Point, the safe, steady childhood she’d fought to give Clem, and everything that really mattered to Tulsi would be destroyed. And no friend was worth that kind of sacrifice. No matter what Pike felt or didn’t feel, Tulsi was going to continue to hold him at a distance. She had too much to lose to even think about a friendship—or anything else—with Pike Sherman.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Pike

  Pike was in trouble. Deep trouble.

  Turned out being nice to Tulsi wasn’t nearly as hard as he’d thought it would be. In fact, a part of him had been thrilled to see her rush into the shop behind Clementine. It had been easy to smile at her, easier to tease her, and when their eyes had met, and he’d watched his steamier memories of their time together playing out behind her eyes…

  All he’d wanted to do was pull her into his arms and kiss her until they brought the heat from their past surging into the present. It was obvious Tulsi still wanted him, and he wanted her so badly the only thing that had stopped him from taking her against the wall of his sister’s lingerie shop was the little girl standing between them. And Clementine would always be between them. Even if his cock could convince his brain that going to bed with Tulsi wasn’t dangerous, Pike couldn’t forget that there was a child involved. Tulsi was a mom, with a little girl who depended on her.

  Watching Tulsi pet Clementine’s hair, as her daughter hugged her tight, had nearly been enough to break his heart all over again. Tulsi was never more beautiful than when she had that sweet, loving look in her eyes, and she obviously loved her daughter more than life itself.

  He had to remember that side of her. It wasn’t okay to fantasize about bending Tulsi over a stack of boxes in the stock room. No matter how tempting it was to imagine her heart-shaped ass tilted toward him as he slid inside her, no matter how much he wanted to hear her calling his name, begging him to make her come—that could never happen.

  Fantasizing about his ex wasn’t going to help him loosen the mental hold she had on him. And no matter how much he wanted another taste of Tulsi, falling back in bed together would be a bad idea. He couldn’t afford that kind of emotional mind-fuck and on the off chance he still had the power to affect Tulsi the same way, he owed it to her daughter to keep his distance. He had to put his anger and desire aside and think of what was best for Clementine.

  Even before he’d met the little girl in person, he’d had a soft spot for her, but now he was a bona fide fan. Mia’s stories hadn’t done her justice. Clementine was a bundle of energy with personality to spare. The fact that Tulsi had ended up with a kid, who was more like a young Pike or Mia than a shy, did-as-she-was-told Tulsi, was a satisfying bit of irony. She clearly had her hands full and didn’t need any more drama in her life than the drama introduced by her little blond look-a-like.

  They really did look almost exactly the same. It was as if Clementine had been cloned from a strand of Tulsi’s DNA, leaving Pike no clue what the father had looked like.

  “So Clementine’s never met her dad?” he found himself asking before he could consider the wisdom of letting Mia know he was still dwelling on their morning visitor.

  “Nope. No letter, cards, money for diapers when Clem was a baby, nothing,” Mia said, popping the last bite of her English muffin into her mouth. “Tulsi talked to the bastard on the phone once not long after she found out she was pregnant, but it obviously didn’t go well. She never told me the specifics, but she cried for two days after and never mentioned the asshole again.”

  Pike scowled, not knowing what bothered him more—that Tulsi had been so emotionally attached to the jerk or that the man had abandoned her. Tulsi was far from Pike’s favorite person, but no woman deserved to be treated that way, especially not when she was only eighteen years old. When Pike had been twenty-two, eighteen hadn’t seemed young. But now, looking back on those years as he was approaching his thirtieth birthday, he realized that Tulsi hadn’t been much more than a baby having a baby.

  Still, she’d stepped up and done everything she could to be a responsible parent, something he admired her for no matter how much she’d hurt him.

  “You still hungry?” Mia pushed her chair back from the table and carried her plate to the sink. “I can fry up some bacon before I go down to open up the shop if you want.”

  “No, I’m good.” Pike stood and stretched, ignoring the twinge in his knee that assured him his ACL was still healing at a snail’s pace. “I’m going to go for a run, clear my head.”

  Mia shot him a look over her shoulder. “Why do you need to clear your head? Tulsi and Clem are fine, Pike. You don’t have to worry about them.”

  “I’m not,” he said, with what he hoped was a casual shrug. “I wasn’t.”

  “You sounded worried.” Mia turned, wiping her hands on one of her rainbow colored dishtowels. “But they’re good, I promise. They’ve done great without that asshole. I know you saw them arguing today, but they really are the cutest little family. They love each other so much.”

  “I could tell.” Pike igno
red the sudden flash of discomfort in his chest. He’d probably had too much coffee. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had more than one cup. Usually, he was in too much of a hurry to get to the gym to linger over breakfast.

  “Then why are you a sad clown?” Mia’s brow furrowed.

  “I’m not a sad clown.” Pike rolled his eyes as he reached around her to drop his coffee cup in the sink.

  “Are you nervous about seeing Dad tonight at dinner?” Mia pressed. “I know he was awful last time, but he’s mellowed out a lot this past year. He only gave Sawyer shit for about two weeks after we moved in together. You guys are going to have a great visit. No need to stress.”

  “I’m not stressed.” Pike backed out of the kitchen before Mia could succeed in making him that way. “It’s eight thirty in the morning, sis. I’m still half asleep.”

  “Well, I’m here if you need to talk about Dad or the break-up or whatever,” Mia called after him. “I know break-up pain can linger, Pike. Don’t be afraid to bend my ear if you need to!”

  “Okay!” he called back before shutting the door to the guest room and changing into his running clothes and knee brace, wishing he’d never invented the stupid break-up story. The longer he was in Lonesome Point, the more the lies seemed to mound up around him. He hadn’t technically lied to Mia this morning, but he hadn’t told the truth, either.

  But what was the truth, he wondered as he slipped out the back door to Mia’s shop and started down the road at a slow jog. The past was clear, but Pike had no idea what was going on between him and Tulsi now. Logically, he knew that moment of chemistry in the stock room was better off forgotten, but he couldn’t seem to keep from replaying every moment of their brief interaction as he ran. The way Tulsi’s lips had parted and her breath rushed out. The way surprise had lowered her defenses, giving him a glimpse into what she was feeling. She’d seemed sad, lonely, and as hungry for a taste of what they’d once had as he was. He’d felt her longing thrumming in the air, plucking the strings inside him only Tulsi had ever been able to touch.