The Higher You Fly

by Debra Kayn

  "Yeah, it's Kurt." The driver's door swung open, and he stepped out into view with the dome light on him.

  "It's me. Jolene." She pointed down the road. "My car went off the road, and I'm stuck."

  "Are you hurt?"

  "No." She zipped her coat up under her chin. "Feeling stupid. I was sliding before I could stop the car."

  "It happens to the best of us." He stepped out of the doorway and hitched his thumb. "Climb on in. I'll drive you back to your car and see if I can pull you out with the chain."

  "Thank you so much." She hurried forward and clumsily climbed into the driver seat and scooted over.

  Kurt started the truck. "Caiden know you're stuck?"

  "No. I tried to call him, but my phone doesn't work out here." She inhaled deeply. "I decided to try and walk up to the clubhouse and see if the reception was better up there."

  "Yeah, there's a spot on the road that doesn't work with most satellites." Kurt cruised slowly up to the corner. "If you ever get stuck in this area again, know you can come up to the clubhouse. Someone will help you."

  "Thank you. That does make me feel better about traveling this road." She reached out and grabbed the dash. "My car is right around the corner."

  Kurt drove by without stopping. "I'll need to go down the road about two miles where I can turn the truck around. I don't think you want me to tow you the wrong way. With the amount of snow we've got, it makes it hard to turn this beast around."

  "I really appreciate this." She sat back in the seat.

  "Anything for someone Caiden cares about." Kurt glanced over at her. "He's settled now that you're back."

  "Is he?" she asked, hoping he was, but wanting to hear someone else's opinion.

  "Over the years, after he stepped away from the events, I worried about him. He was out to destroy himself. Didn't care about anyone or anything." Kurt tapped his thumb against the steering wheel. "But, he kept coming around to spar. Even stayed at the clubhouse for a while. But, he's calmed lately, and I think that has a lot to do with you."

  While she caused him a lot of grief for not keeping her promise to stay with him, Caiden also dealt with a community that hated the fact he continued living in Federal after his release. She moistened her lips. He wouldn't have to step inside the ring again because he owned a business and she wasn't planning on leaving him.

  "Does he still ask you to spar with him?" She studied Kurt in the glow of the dashboard.

  "Not since he hurt his hand on the bag." Kurt pulled over in a plowed area and turned the truck around. "But, I hope he does. Gives me an excuse to work up a sweat. I enjoy exchanging hits with him."

  She had never received a straight answer out of Caiden about his injury and figured he'd hurt it at work. She swallowed hard. He'd hurt it working out at Bantorus.

  "It's starting to snow again," said Kurt.

  She looked up and out the window. All she wanted to do was get home. After her little mishap while driving, she'd be satisfied to go home and call Caiden on the phone and have him stay off the road tonight. She could tell him everything tomorrow.

  Kurt slowed down and stopped in front of her car. "Go ahead and get in your car. I'll hook the chain up. You'll need to put the car in neutral and steer once you feel the chain get taunt. When my brake lights go on, you step nice and easy on your brakes. I'll pull you up to the clubhouse. The road is better plowed from there up to your road. You should be able to drive the rest of the way with no problems."

  "Okay." She grabbed her purse, the flashlight, and hopped out of the truck.

  Once she had the seatbelt on in her car, she followed Kurt's instructions. The tug of the chain growing taunt came, and she leaned forward, steering the car back onto the road. The tires stayed in the ruts, and she stared at the back of Kurt's truck which was dangerously close to the front of her car. If he stopped, she was afraid she'd slide right into him.

  Finally, the clubhouse appeared like a beacon in the night. She gripped the steering wheeler harder, hovering her foot above the brake. Before she knew it, she was stopped, and Kurt had undone the chain on the front of her car and walked toward her.

  She lowered the window. "Thank you, again."

  Kurt planted his hands on the car door and leaned down. "I'll follow you to the cabin and make sure you get there okay."

  Relief flooded through her. "I swear, I'm going to bake cookies or brownies, maybe both, and bring them to you the next time I go to town for all your help."

  Kurt chuckled. "I won't say no."

  She laughed and waited until he'd moved out of her way, and then she pulled back out on the road. Taking longer than normal, because she found herself panicking every time her tires slid, she finally pulled to a stop at the cabin. She sagged in the seat, tension releasing at once in her body, at seeing Caiden's truck already there. He'd made it home okay.

  Her door opened, and Caiden appeared beside her. "Jolene?"

  "I'm okay." She reached for his hand, letting him pull her out of the car. "My car slid off the road. Kurt helped and followed me home."

  Caiden studied her and then wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight. Smooshed into his coat, she shuddered, thankful he was here, and held onto him with an iron fist.

  "Thanks, Kurt," said Caiden. "I'm taking her into the house."

  She tried to lift her hand to wave to Kurt, but Caiden had her moving through the yard and up on the porch before she could even take her face off his chest.

  He took her keys out of her hand and opened the door. She stepped inside and dropped her purse. Caiden unzipped her coat, and when she had her boots off, he held her.

  "You're not hurt?" he said, huskily.

  "No, not at all." She hugged him. "A little freaked out when it happened. I've never slid off the road or been towed before."

  He held her tighter. "You scared the shit out of me. I've been waiting outside for the last three hours and calling you. I had no idea you went off the road, or I would've gone looking for you."

  She pulled back. "Kurt found me right after it happened. It didn't take very long at all to get me home. He hooked a chain up and pulled me right out of the snow bank."

  "Then, why weren't you answering my calls this afternoon?" His jaw ticked. "Jesus, you'd called and left a message on my phone, saying it was important to talk to me. I thought something was wrong and drove right to the cabin and you weren't here."

  "Oh, honey." She framed his face with her hands. "I'm sorry. So much has happened today and I was excited to tell you what I was doing...had done. Then, my mom kept calling, and I shut the ringer off on my phone to ignore her. I never imagined it was you who was calling me."

  "Your mom?"

  "I have so much to tell you." She smiled and pulled him to the couch. "That's why I had left a message."

  Caiden frowned. "What's going on?"

  "Good things. Wonderful things." She waited until he sat and then slid onto his lap, not wanting to be away from him. "First, I have to tell you..." She inhaled a deep breath. "No, I have to start at the beginning."

  "Jolene." His brows lowered in impatience.

  His wonderful Norwegian brows that intimidated others looked beautiful to her. She kissed him softly, grounding herself. Then, she peppered him with light kisses, calming both of them, before confessing her deepest fears and sharing her dream.

  "When I moved back here, I upset my parents." She swallowed. "Our relationship had never been the same after they put me in the institution. The only contact I had with them was when I went to Arizona once a year for my dad's birthday so they could keep up appearances of having a loving daughter within their social circle, and once in a while my mom would call and try to control my life from afar. Remember when I was gone and you thought I went to Casey?"

  He nodded.

  "I went to Arizona for my dad's birthday party. My mom used that party to have Dr. Virann, the doctor that I saw in the institution who also practices in Federal, confront me about coming back to
therapy."

  "What?" Caiden frowned. "Why now after all these years?"

  "Because my mom doesn't want me living in Federal or seeing you. At least that's what she tells me. I think she doesn't want me to fall apart again because it reflects badly on her and I hate to say this, but I think my mother simply likes to make a bigger deal out of my mental health, because it gives her a sense of control. Even though I know what she's doing isn't in my best interest, it plays on how I deal with my life. I start to doubt myself, and because my mom expresses her worry to me, I begin to worry. I've let her have control over how I feel, and I know that's not right." Jolene shrugged. "Anyway, lately, Dr. Virann has been telling my mom that I'm seeing you again."

  Caiden hardened underneath her. She placed her hand on his chest. "I know. Totally unethical, considering I'm not her patient anymore and haven't been since I left the institution. Today, I realized that I've been keeping you to myself and not moving forward. I love having you spend the night, but that last step of committing myself to our relationship escaped me because deep down I was afraid of going through the heartbreak again and losing myself."

  "I wouldn't break your heart," said Caiden.

  "I know." She inhaled. "The other night when I gave you the suncatcher, my mom was the one who called me. She was trying to convince me to make an appointment with Dr. Virann because she'd heard you were staying at the cabin."

  "That's bull shit."

  "I agree, and I told her that." Jolene held on to Caiden, knowing he was getting mad. "When I'm with you, I can push my mom and my fears away. But, today, when I was alone, I knew what I had to do to keep moving forward if I was going to have a chance with you. I went to town and marched into Dr. Virann's office and threatened to sue her if she talked to my mom again about me. I even had her call my mom and tell her the same while I was there."

  Caiden's mouth tightened. "You should've waited until I could be with you."

  "No." She sat up straighter. "I needed to do it myself. This is what I want, Caiden. If my mom can't stay out of my life, leaving these doubts in my head, then she's going to learn that I won't be in her life. I can never get the years back that we could've had together and that will bother me for the rest of my life."

  He cupped her cheek and trailed the pad of his thumb over her bottom lip. "What are you saying, Jolene?"

  "I’m saying, I've always loved you, and I broke my promise to be there when you were released from prison, and I'm not going to waste another day away from you. My fears and other people will not stop me from loving you." Her vision blurred and she blinked at the onslaught of tears, setting them free. "I bought the cabin because I was trying to put the pieces of the life we'd dreamt about back together. I never imagined finding you in Federal, and now I can't imagine living here without you. Please, say it's not too late for us, and move in with me. Let me love you for the rest of our lives."

  He captured her lips. She kissed him back with a desperate need for forgiveness.

  Caiden pulled back, breathing hard. "I can't live without you."

  "Really?" she whispered, sniffing.

  He held her face. "I have something to tell you."

  "Okay."

  "When I got out of prison, I boxed to make money." His voice lowered. "Before I purchased the gas station, my house, the rentals, I bought something else because I was still trying to hold on to my promise to you."

  "What?"

  "The cabin," he said.

  "But..." She shook her head, realizing what he was saying. "You were the owner my realtor contacted? But, the name on the papers was..."

  "C.H. Holdings, which is the LLC I use for the gas station. I had everything I own put under that name for tax purposes about five years ago." He tilted his head back and inhaled deeply before looking at her again. "After prison, I had nothing and spent every dime I won to buy this place. I'd come out here, sit in front of the fireplace or out on the porch, but it wasn't the same. Not without you. So, I entered more boxing events and made a life in town. The day I got the call from the realtor asking me if I was interested in selling, he dropped your name. You are the only person I would ever want to live in our cabin."

  "Oh, Caiden, you were so angry, but you continued to love me," she whispered.

  "Never stopped."

  She nodded, understanding that bond, deeper than the mind could break, that kept her loving him through everyone's attempt to tell her it wasn't real. The love her heart never gave up on.

  Overwhelmed with how they'd both continued to live as if years hadn't separated them, she laid her head on his shoulder and held on to him. She yawned. Her productive day catching up to her.

  She kissed the side of his neck. "Take me to our bed, Caiden Hall."

  He stood with her in his arms and carried her toward the bedroom. She no longer wished for the past but looked forward to the future.

  CHAPTER 33

  Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you. —Walter Winchell

  Caiden laid on his back with his eyes closed. Jolene, having woke up twenty minutes ago, sat on top of him with his cock inside of her. She held perfectly still, biting down on her lip to keep her amusement quiet.

  There was no way Caiden remained asleep.

  She trailed her finger over his chest, drawing a heart on his bare skin. His cock pulsed deep inside of her. That was only one of the many responses she'd received that he was aware of what she was doing to him.

  His eyes remained closed. His jaw loose. His hands limp—one above his head and one at his side.

  She raised up on her knees and sank back down, stroking him with her sex. Her nipples hardened for the simple fact that she loved him while he pretended to sleep. He'd pretended to snore when her hand had worked him to hardness. He'd pretended not to notice when she rubbed against his side when she opened her eyes this morning. He'd pretended not to be aware of when she rolled the condom on him. He'd pretended not to feel the bed dip when she climbed atop him.

  Rocking slowing back and forth, she reached behind her, between Caiden's legs, and cupped his balls, rolling them gently in her palm. His scrotum tightened, and she smiled.

  He wasn't sleeping.

  She lightly scratched the sensitive skin with her fingernails. A slight tightening of his hips flinched underneath her as his muscles fought the pleasurable sensation. Wanting to see how long he could remain a bystander, she planted her hands on each side of him on the mattress and rode his cock. Gazing at his face, she witnessed the moment his nostrils flared as his breathing deepened.

  Encouraged, she increased the length of her strokes by raising higher, coming down harder. Aroused, she moved in the way her body demanded until she no longer teased him but pleasured herself.

  Her body warmed, and her muscles tightened. She breathed harder, feeding the spiral of arousal building in her lower stomach without stopping the up and down motion her body dictated.

  The soft slap of skin against skin filled her ears. She moved her hands from the bed to Caiden's chest and arched her back, throwing back her head. The friction between her legs left her gasping as his cock touched her deep in her body.

  Her toes dug into the blankets on the bed, gaining traction for her to keep going. Her core swirled faster, tighter until she reduced her movements to bumping down on him and grinding.

  Frantic for release, she reached and reached, tossing her head forward and opening her eyes and found Caiden intently staring at her. The expression on his face could only be described as enthralled.

  And, she came.

  She came hard, staring into his eyes.

  Her body wracked with pleasure convulsed on top of him, unconsciously aware of him rolling her onto her back and pounding into her, before joining the euphoria she'd created for the both of them.

  Caiden's body had shuddered before his weight came down on her and he rolled to his side, taking her with him. She laid her head on his chest, catching her breath.

  His hand stroked her h
ead. "Morning," he mumbled tiredly.

  She lifted her head and kissed him. "You were awake the whole time."

  "No way in hell was I going to stop your fun." His chest shook with amusement. "Damn, woman."

  She laughed. "It's your fault."

  He kissed her hard and sat up. "I'll take the blame if that's how you plan on waking me up every morning."

  She sat up and grabbed his flannel shirt. "Did you bring clothes with you?"

  "Yeah, my bags out in the truck."

  She crawled over the bed and sat behind him, hugging his back. "How is this going to work? If you move into the cabin—"

  "If?" he said.

  "When." She kissed his back. "What are you going to do with your house?"

  "Rent it out. It'll be added income for us." He squeezed her hand. "I'll start moving my stuff over tonight. I don't have much. What furniture I have, I'll take to the Salvation Army on Saturday. I don't want it."

  "You don't have to do that. We can make room." She sat back when he stood from the bed.

  "You saw my place." He turned around. "There's nothing worth keeping."

  His sparsely furnished house had looked lonely to her. She slid off the bed, patted his ass, and headed to the kitchen to make his coffee and get her a mug of warm milk.

  Calmed from yesterday's changes in her life, she remembered the suncatcher she'd made Caiden and the sketches she'd drawn.

  "Hey, Caiden?" she said.

  He walked into the kitchen. "Yeah?"

  "What's your schedule like today?" She opened the microwave and took out her warmed milk.

  Caiden opened the fridge and took out a piece of the cold pizza. "Once the plow goes through, I'm going to the gas station and make sure everything is up and running. Then, I'll swing by the house and grab my clothes and whatever else I can throw in the truck if the weather holds out."

  She looked over to the window. "It's not snowing."

  "Not yet." He took a bite of pizza. "It's cold out, though. You've got icicles hanging off the porch."

  "Good day to stay inside." She handed him his coffee and shook the cinnamon container over her mug of milk and stirred. "Which is what I'm going to do. Yesterday, I came up with a new idea for the Quintessential Line."