“Yeah, I mean, it will be. I just wanted to ask—or say, rather—thank you for the producer credit. It’s very kind. I just don’t know if I’m able to handle it right now. Or that I know what I’m doing.”
“Lori says you’ve been doing a wonderful job—I just talked to her this morning,” Bennett said.
Griffin spun around, trying to keep his jaw from falling open.
Bennett seemed to take his expression for something else and grinned. “Don’t tell Daisy, okay? I’m not supposed to be working.”
“She said….”
“She said you have great ideas and a good handle on what needs to be done, and that’s all I need to hear.” Bennett’s comforting smile slipped back into seriousness. “Is there something else going on? I don’t want to force you to do this, Griffin, but if it’s a confidence thing, you shouldn’t have a crisis over it. You’re doing great.”
Griffin nodded. Well, this wasn’t going as anticipated. “Thanks. I guess I’m just overly concerned about getting it right.”
“No one gets it 100 percent on the first try.” He winked. “Except for me, of course.”
“Of course.” Griffin relaxed a bit as he leaned against the counter. He even managed a real smile. “Not all of us have your magic touch.”
Bennett’s expression did something Griffin never expected: He looked vulnerable.
“I’ve never had a flop in this business. Everything I’ve done has made a profit,” Bennett said slowly, tracing a random pattern on the marble countertop. “Matt calls me Daddy Warbucks, and I suppose that’s accurate in more than one way.”
Griffin got it. He nodded slowly. “Daisy.”
“I thought I knew what I wanted out of life—I mean, I had everything you’re supposed to want. Sleeping with attractive people, living exactly the way I wanted, answering to no one.” Bennett traced a heart with his fingertip. “No consequences to my actions.”
“Then along comes a pretty girl….” Griffin laughed, but Bennett shook his head.
“No, then along came a woman who was reduced to a suitcase and no prospects. Who auditioned with a ferocious energy that no one else came close to matching.” He sounded… awed. “She was sitting at her rock bottom and didn’t try to hide it—she just tried to turn it around. I think I fell in love by the time she finished her monologue.”
Curiosity pushed Griffin forward. He walked to stand opposite Bennett, who was still drawing on the marble. “I never quite understood—” he started to say.
“How I dated men but married a woman? I assume that’s your question. I know everyone’s dying to ask.”
Griffin tucked his head down, blushing.
“Actually there were plenty of women—I just happened to step out on the red carpet with men.” Bennett shrugged. “But a bisexual man is generally labeled gay, and to my shame, I didn’t do anything to correct it.”
Griffin tsked, even as he took a moment to poke at his own prejudices, knowing that more often than not, he assumed that as well. “So Daisy wasn’t a total reversal.”
“No, she was. Because I didn’t want to sleep with her—I mean, I did.” Bennett laughed loudly. “Even you can understand that.”
“I’ve been around since she went through puberty—believe me, you weren’t the first man to think that way,” Griffin said, arid and arch.
“So yes—yes. I’m no better than any of those other men. I thought she was stunning and… and… powerful in her vulnerability. I wanted to make her my muse and my girlfriend and… and then I realized I couldn’t make her do anything.”
The smile seemed to sink off his face. Bennett gave Griffin a shrug. “Everything I had, everything I could offer—that wasn’t what Daisy wanted. She was looking to start over, to find herself. And that’s what I wanted to give her. The freedom to do that—to be whoever she wanted, without my input,” he finished wryly.
“You didn’t want to change her,” Griffin said, suddenly realizing what Bennett was really saying.
“No.”
Griffin kicked the floor, his sneakers making a scuffing sound. “Even if it would make things easier.”
“There’s nothing easy about hiding who you are and what you want, even for the sake of less arguments.”
“Ouch,” Griffin sighed.
Bennett seemed confused, so Griffin reached over and patted his hand. “No, it’s fine. Thanks for… just thanks.”
“For?”
“For helping me and Daisy, and bringing Sadie into this world so I could be the most irritatingly involved godfather ever.”
“Duly noted.” Bennett gave Griffin’s hand a squeeze. “Now I’m going to go out and enjoy my guests and my favorite ladies in a spot with a million-dollar view.”
“Braggart.”
Bennett laughed as he got up, collected his towels. “Are you coming down?”
“Yeah. Gimme a few minutes?”
And then Griffin was alone.
THERE WERE little furniture vignettes everywhere on the expansive first floor. The living room, the formal living room (which meant no television, as far as Griffin understood decorating terms), the television room (where the television was bigger than the one in the regular living room), a music room with everything from a grand piano to a jukebox, and two dining rooms.
Who the hell needed two dining rooms?
But he couldn’t deny it was a beautiful home, tasteful and not at all in the “look, don’t touch” scheme of Daisy’s house when she was married to Claus.
Past the music room, Griffin found the library, with narrow windows and warm overstuffed furniture in shades of honey and slate blue. He poked around at the various shelves—a wide selection of summer reading and more serious tomes, and possibly every book ever written about Broadway. The original idea was to clear his head for a moment and head down to the beach, but for now, he grabbed an unauthorized biography of David Merrick and settled into the chair nearest the window to read.
JIM FOUND him there an hour later, book on his chest, head tipped back, snoring quietly in the sunlight.
He’d come up from the beach after some time with the group; laughter and chatting permeated the air, but Jim felt quiet in the reflection of so many happy couples—and little Sadie in her bouncy seat, swaddled up and tucked under a wide umbrella. She kicked and trilled, grabbing at the brightly colored toys suspended over her.
She also produced the most toxic smell Jim had ever had the displeasure of experiencing, and he used to work Homicide.
Mostly Jim watched Bennett and Daisy, the glamorous couple who spent so much of their lives being the center of attention and living unencumbered, now entirely focused on their baby girl.
It didn’t make sense to him, but then, maybe it didn’t have to.
He made his excuses and set off to find Griffin, knowing glances from Evan and Daisy sending him on his way.
He wanted to say What do you see? because he wasn’t sure.
It took him the walk from the beach to finding Griffin sleeping in the library to make up his mind.
Chapter 16
GRIFFIN WOKE up to Jim’s touch, just a gentle stroke across his cheek. He started, dropping the book on the floor, then rubbed his eyes under his glasses.
“Oh, sorry—fell asleep. I meant to come down,” Griffin said, picking the book up.
Jim didn’t say anything.
Griffin started to get up, the book in hand. “Let me wash my face or something—God, I’m just so sleepy….”
He put the book on the shelf, turned around.
And found Jim in the chair he’d just vacated.
“I’m not having sex with you in a library,” Griffin said, pursing his lips. “It’s unseemly.”
Jim patted his lap, but Griffin held firm—for about ten seconds. Then the pull of Jim’s eyes and the fact that he loved him stupid glorious amounts…. Griffin straddled his legs, soaking in the warmth of his body.
“Hi,” Jim said tenderly, and Griffin’s heart
beat a little bit faster.
“Hi.”
“I think we’ve been acting like assholes to each other for a few weeks.” Jim rubbed Griffin’s arms. “We need to talk.”
“I hate talking.”
“You talk all the damn time. You talk in your sleep. You talk during sex—” Jim rattled off, until Griffin put his palm over his mouth.
“I talk, but I don’t always say what I should.” Griffin swallowed as Jim nodded. Then he pulled his hand away. “I love you, and I love our life, but I don’t want to live in guest rooms and hotels anymore.”
Jim smiled as he leaned forward and dropped a kiss on Griffin’s bottom lip. “I want to live anywhere you’re happy,” he said gently.
Griffin’s smile faltered slightly. “LA? Seattle?” he asked softly, plucking nervously at Jim’s T-shirt.
“Whichever.”
“New York?”
That caught Jim’s attention. Griffin felt him tense, felt his hands tighten on his arms.
“New York? Seriously?”
“I don’t want to live with my dad,” Griffin pushed on. “And we can split our time if you want—Seattle and then have a place here—but… I want to be with my family. I know he’s better and the doctors don’t think he’s in danger, but that heart attack—it scared the crap out of me, Jim. I don’t want to be three thousand miles away from him if anything happens again. And now Sadie’s here and I just—I would really love to see her grow up.”
Jim didn’t say anything, just stared at him deep and serious until Griffin felt the panic start to rise. It welled up in his gut, his throat, until he wanted to take the words back.
“Okay.”
Griffin blinked.
“Okay, we’ll get a place here,” Jim murmured, reaching up to touch Griffin’s face. “In between your dad’s and the city, so you can be around Sadie and still keep an eye on him.”
The panic turned to relief so quickly Griffin felt a little dizzy. He folded down, laid his head on Jim’s shoulder. “Thank you,” he whispered as Jim stroked his back.
“On one condition,” Jim added and Griffin shifted slightly. He assumed it would be that they had to spend part of the year in Seattle or even Tacoma, at the house Ed Kelley had left for them.
“Okay.”
Jim nudged him, pushed him to sit up so they were looking at each other.
“The condition is—we have to get married.”
Chapter 17
EVAN GOT off the phone with Elizabeth, tucked it back into his pocket. Matt, Shane, and Helena were playing a Frisbee game that involved tackling and a great deal of swearing. Bennett kept putting his hands over Sadie’s ears, much to Daisy’s delight.
“How are the kids?” Daisy asked, shifting over to sit near Evan. Her big straw hat cast a shadow on his knees, reminding him to grab the tube of sunscreen.
“Good. The little ones are with their aunt and uncle in Woodstock.” Evan laughed at his description of the kids. “Little ones—they’d be pissed if they heard me. They start their last year of middle school next week.”
“Oh my gosh.” Daisy pressed her hands over her face, shaking her head. “I can’t even imagine Sadie at that age.”
“And I’ve got one at college and another living with her boyfriend.” Evan squirted some sunscreen on his hand. “They don’t know I know, but I, uh—I know.”
Daisy giggled. “Do you still look at them and see helpless little babies?”
That struck Evan as incredibly perceptive; he kept forgetting Daisy was a regular person and not just someone he’d seen on movie screens or cable television. “All the time. Every time we pass another milestone birthday. Every time a voice changes or they get taller.” He rubbed the liquid on his skin, casting another look at Sadie sleeping quietly under the umbrella.
“Do you ever want more?”
Evan pulled his attention back to Daisy. “More kids? Oh God.” He laughed as he shook his head. “No. I think that ship is sailed.”
“I wonder if Matt is sorry he missed the whole package, you know? Babies to adults and all that,” Daisy mused. “He came in in the middle.”
“Skipped diapers. That’s always a plus,” Evan joked, even as his thoughts drifted to places more serious. Sometimes it felt strange to touch the dividing line between the segments of his life. Before Sherri died. After Matt came into his life. When he and Sherri raised the kids; when he and Matt did the job.
When Sherri shouldered the bulk of home life because Evan was a workaholic.
When Matt did the same.
One didn’t exist without the other in the time line of his life.
“Very true. Not to mention teething and temper tantrums,” Daisy laughed, unaware of Evan’s thoughts. “He might have gotten the better end of the deal.”
“Agreed,” Evan said, but he felt a certain contemplation as he rubbed more sunscreen into his overheated skin.
“YOU LOSE!” Shane yelled, throwing his arms around Helena’s waist and pulling her to the sand. She screamed and giggled as they flopped around. Matt shook his head fondly. They literally took any excuse to grope the hell out of each other.
He admired that, he really did.
“Are you commenting on the game or her choice in men?” Matt teased, dusting sand off his legs and the seat of his shorts.
“Mean!” Helena snorted as she struggled out of Shane’s grasp.
“Who?”
“Both of you. Boys suck.” She wrestled herself up off the sand, shaking some of it out of her bikini bottom.
If Matt still liked girls…. “Well, in my case, that’s certainly true,” Matt deadpanned.
Helena flashed him a saucy look. “I don’t want to hear about your sex life, Haight. It’s bad enough I heard plenty last night.”
Matt shrugged—and didn’t bother to deny it. “You did it under a blanket, which I hope you are having dry-cleaned,” Matt said primly.
That earned him a blush. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said as Shane laughed uproariously from his spot on the sand.
“He knows.”
“Boys suck!”
“Again? This is not new.” Matt looked around. “Especially with this crowd.”
Shane nearly choked on his own tongue as he rolled around.
“Okay, I’m done with this conversation. I need a wine spritzer,” Helena announced. She tried to walk gracefully over to the blankets, but the bikini bottom full of sand disrupted her fabulous exit.
Matt gave Shane a hand up off the ground, slapping him on the back as they made their way to their friends.
In the distance Matt spotted Griffin and Jim, hand in hand, walking toward them. The smiles they were both sporting were hard to miss.
“Well, I guess the argument is over,” Shane murmured, but Matt saw something beyond just settling a tiff.
Griffin was shining, and Jim looked utterly content.
“Oh ho, we’re getting some news,” Matt hooted. He pushed Shane to walk faster.
EVAN CAUGHT sight of Griffin and Jim traipsing over to them, and much like Griffin’s baby fever, it was hard to miss the joyful expression on his face right now.
Good news.
Very good news.
“Oh hey, could we, uh, get everyone over here,” Griffin called out, his voice breaking a little.
Daisy stood as the others made it to the little colony of blankets and umbrellas. “Everything okay?” she asked.
“Everything’s amazing.”
Evan felt a hand slide into his—Matt dropping down next to him, a grin lighting his face.
“So, Jim and I have some announcements,” Griffin said, breathless and grinning as Jim put his arm around his waist. “We’re—we’re moving to New York.”
Daisy squeaked, her joy evident as she clapped her hands.
“And we’re, uh—we’re sort of getting married.”
Evan couldn’t contain his smile as pandemonium erupted. He and Matt were the last to stand up to
offer their congratulations. He remembered the first time they all met. Evan had been rude and jealous, uncomfortable with his own envy and anger. Jim was gorgeous; he and Griffin were in love and so comfortable in their feelings for each other—Evan hadn’t wanted to like either of them.
But then he got a reminder that life is too short—to be afraid, to keep people at arm’s length.
Evan slipped his arm around Matt’s body and pulled him close.
MATT PULLED Jim into a tight hug once they made it past a delirious Daisy. All the commotion woke Sadie, who demanded Mommy’s attention more than Griffin needed it right now.
“Well, that’s a surprise,” he whispered as Jim returned the embrace.
“I made up my mind about ten seconds before I found him,” Jim whispered back. “And then it was the most logical thing in the world.”
“Sap,” Matt said loudly, separating their bodies slowly. He looked over at Griffin getting a slightly less affectionate embrace from Evan. “Another prime bachelor off the market,” he teased.
Jim shoved him off. “Prime? Are you including yourself in that group?”
Matt didn’t hesitate; he smirked and said, “I haven’t been a bachelor in years.”
Chapter 18
“NOT A bachelor, huh?” Evan murmured as they floated in the pool. It was late, hours past the champagne and huge crab feast that was dinner, the celebration over Griffin and Jim’s joyful news. Hours past the happy toasting around the fire pit and second dinner, as everyone was tipsy and hungry at half past eleven.
Grilled cheese never tasted so good.
“Huh?” Matt leaned on the side of the pool, kicking his feet lazily next to Evan’s.
“You told Jim you weren’t a bachelor.”
Matt blinked in the moonlight, in the faint glow from the tiki torches burning in a circular pattern around the patio. He looked hazy and mellow, hair curling from the wind and the pool and the late hour.
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