Waiting for Tuesday: Suspicious Hearts Book Two

by Taylor Sullivan

  “You okay? Feeling good?” Becky asked.

  I pulled in a breath, knowing she was asking about the baby, and I nodded. “I’m fine.” The baby was fine. There had been no more bleeding since that night at the cabin, but I still couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t sit in my own shop without missing him, without something, everything filling me with memories of our time together.

  Becky had insisted on setting up the grand opening so I could rest. She even pulled the couch out of my office to the very middle of the product floor so I could interact with the customers during the party. But it hurt so bad to be here, to remember, and all I wanted to do was go home.

  My eyes shifted to the entrance as I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. John promised me he’d be here, that he’d stand by my side, hold my hand. The door had opened hundreds of times in the last few hours, but none of them had been him. Not that I expected him to, but I was prolonging my hurt with hope. I needed to explain, I needed him to know the truth. I wanted him to know that what we had wasn’t a lie. I loved him. And I would never stop.

  A little old lady stepped into my line of vision, blocking my view of the entrance and pulling me from my thoughts. I looked up to her kind face, her hair so white that it glowed from the sun streaming through the windows behind her.

  “Hi dear,” she began, her voice quiet and hoarse as she twisted a tin of dried herbs between her crooked fingers. “I was wondering if you could help me. I don’t see very well. Would you tell me how much this is?”

  I smiled and nodded. “Of course.” I took the tin from her hand.

  Her eyes were soft, but there was something in them that made me feel uncomfortable as if she recognized me, although I was certain I’d never met her before in my life. I quickly took the tin and flipped it over. “Um, nine dollars and ninety-nine cents.” I met her eyes again as I handed it back. “They’re very good. Grown locally by a farmer, not thirty miles away.”

  She smiled back and took the herbs from my hand. “Is this your shop, dear?”

  I nodded, curious as to why she was asking the question, but there was something about her I didn’t like. I could almost see my own fear when I looked into her eyes. Normally, I loved meeting people like this, the eccentric ones, the ones who knew more than the rest of us did. But not today. I couldn’t handle it today; I was too vulnerable.

  She smiled and met my eyes again. “Are you married, dear?”

  “No,” I said, shaking my head.

  “Divorced?”

  “No,” I whispered.

  She frowned, as though I’d given her an answer she wasn’t expecting. “Ahh, well… I just felt something here when I walked through the door. I thought it might have been because of you.”

  She turned away from me to walk in the opposite direction, but I sat forward and touched her arm. I knew I should just let her go, but I couldn’t. “Ma’am, what did you see?”

  She turned to face me again, looking from ceiling to floor before meeting my eyes. “There was love here once.” She shook her head. “It was very strong, not something you find every day.” She looked into my eyes again. “It was given up on too easily. Like it was nothing. Such a shame.” She tsked.

  My eyes brimmed with tears, but I wiped them away before she addressed me again. “Do you know who owned it before you?”

  “No.” I pushed myself from the couch. Goose bumps covered my body as I headed to the back room. I barely made it through the door before my shoulders began to shake. Becky was right behind me, as she always was, closing the door before turning me around.

  “She’s just a crazy old lady, Tuesday. You’re okay. Don’t let her words get to you.”

  I shook my head and looked her in the eyes. “You think she’s crazy?” I cried. “Becky, she knew things! She said there was love here, and there was. She said something happened, and it did. She said it was given up too easily… and maybe that’s true too! Don’t you believe in fate, Becky? Maybe she was meant to come in here and bring me that message. Maybe I’m giving up too easily.”

  “Tuesday,” Becky began, shaking my shoulders. “Those words could be true for anyone. To you, to me, to everyone out there in your shop. Because we’ve all loved and lost, don’t you see that?”

  “No.” I shook my head. “This was different. This was so different.”

  She gripped my shoulders and spun me around before opening the door a crack so we could peek back into the store. “She’s crazy, Tuesday, look at her. Look at her socks—who wears socks like that?”

  I found her in the corner of the shop by the lotions, opening jars and sniffing them before putting them back on the shelf. She wore knee high socks, visible beneath her yellow sack-like dress, and little red capes were flying off the backs of her calves: Wonder Woman.

  I blew my nose on a tissue, not knowing what to think. She did look crazy, but the same argument could be used for me most days. Then the door chimed at the front entrance, and I looked in its direction. A large bouquet of roses was all I saw, and my heart slammed in my chest.

  I tried to see who it was, but the crowd was too large for me to see beyond, even when I went up on my toes. I held my breath, waiting for the crowd to clear, holding Becky’s hand and praying that he had come back to find me. Then Austin stepped out from a group of people and began looking around the shop.

  His hair was combed back, and he wore fitted jeans that showed off his muscular thighs. The sight of him initiated a hush of whispers to roll over the entire store, but all the air expelled from my lungs as I turned around. I should’ve been happy he was here to see me, that he wasn’t running away like my own father, but I wasn’t. I was disappointed he wasn’t John. All I wanted was him.

  Becky opened the door, and Austin slipped into the back room. “Wow, it’s standing room only in there. You must be so happy.”

  I forced a smile and took the flowers from his outstretched hand. A full dozen long-stemmed red roses. “You didn’t have to do this.”

  He shook his head slightly, looking at the floor then up to me. His jaw tightened and he didn’t look so happy anymore. “There’s been talk around the studio that you were in the hospital because of the baby.”

  I looked to Becky, wondering where he’d heard the news, then turned toward the kitchen and placed the roses on the counter. I could hear the frustration in his voice and knew it wasn’t invalid. He should have been the first person I called, but I hadn’t even thought about it.

  “I’m sorry,” I began, turning around to face him. “I slipped in the rain, but the doctor assured me it was nothing, so I never thought to call you. I’m not used to having to report back to anyone… about anything.”

  His expression softened and he nodded. As though he understood completely. “We have a lot to figure out in the next few months…” He walked toward me and rested his hip on the counter. We were both quiet a second, awkwardly looking at the counter, then he swallowed.

  “There’s also something else.” He looked over his shoulder to Becky, as though looking for her support. She looked down at her feet, and right away, I knew she was responsible for this. For all of it.

  “When I asked you to marry me,” he began, “I hadn’t even considered there was another guy.”

  I squared my shoulders and inhaled a breath. I looked to Becky, but she only gestured for me to listen. I met Austin’s eyes again and nodded my head, urging for him to continue.

  “I wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry you’re facing this difficult situation. I’m sorry I got you pregnant when you didn’t want to be. If there’s anything you need me to do―” He stopped and looked to the ground before meeting my eyes. “I know something happened and I’m sorry. If you need me to talk to him, to straighten things out for you, you just let me know, and I’ll do anything.”

  Tears were streaming down my face by now, and I shook my head. “It’s not your fault, Austin. You don’t need to be sorry.”

  He opened his arms to me, not crying, b
ut I could see he was close to it too. I stepped into his chest and let him hold me. He wasn't John, and he would never be, but I could tell he would be a friend to me. And he’d make an excellent father.

  Chapter THIRTY-FIVE

  John

  Five days later

  I threw Ginger’s leash to the coffee table, knocking over the basket and causing its contents to spill out all over the floor. I didn’t care. I didn’t bother to pick it up, and pulled my shirt over my head as I headed for the bathroom.

  I needed a shower. To wash away this crap of a day and forget about her, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t stop thinking about her because her name was everywhere. Because her fucking name would forever be stuck in the middle of each fucking week! For the rest of my life, I’d have to see it every time I looked at the fucking calendar.

  I sat on the side of the bed, my body heavy with exhaustion as I began to unlace my boots. A knock sounded at the door, but I ignored it, wanting whoever it was to go away. I wasn’t in the mood for unexpected guests, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to be nice if I answered it. But the sound only came louder.

  “Fucking shit.” I pulled off one boot, just as Ginger began to bark at the door. I pushed myself from the bed, Ginger’s bark increasing in volume, as I stormed down the hallway and yanked the door open.

  Tuesday stood at the landing. She stepped back at the sight of me, her chest visibly rising and falling as she breathed. Ginger rushed out to greet her, sniffing and licking her hand like a week hadn’t gone by since she’d seen her last, but Tuesday never looked down. She only stood there, wearing overalls with one of my big flannel work shirts over the top, her face streaked from tears.

  “You didn’t come,” she said after a moment. Her voice was low and winded, as if she had run the whole way here.

  I looked to the ground and pulled in a breath. The sight of her was still too painful to bear. “You honestly expected me to?”

  “You promised.”

  I gripped my forehead, letting out a slight laugh that held no humor. “Well, a lot has changed since I made that promise.” I glanced up, but my eyes locked on her hands, fisted at her sides as though she was afraid of me. I hated it. I was mad as hell about what happened, but I hated every damn second of her fear. “What do you want, Tuesday?” I asked in the softest voice possible.

  She didn’t answer.

  I opened the door wider and stepped to the side to let her in. “Come in. You’re supposed to be resting.”

  She shook her head, but her body became more rigid. “This will only take a second.” She looked down briefly. “Becky’s waiting for me in the parking lot.”

  I rested my shoulders in the doorway and nodded. Her body was shaking so badly, I knew whatever she planned to say was hard for her, and I wanted to make it as easy as possible so she could go.

  She wrapped her arms around her belly and met my eyes. “Thirteen weeks ago I got drunk at a party and woke up with a man in my bed. I was so drunk I don’t even remember a single thing we did that night. I’m not proud of it, but it happened. I never saw him again after that, but I knew who he was. He worked at Parker Studios with Becky.”

  She took a deep breath then closed her eyes briefly before continuing. “I didn’t know it then, but I got pregnant that night—then a few weeks later construction began and everything was busy. I didn’t even notice when my period was different, but I had it, John. I swear.”

  She was crying between each word, and my chest was heavy from the sound of it. I wanted to grab her and hold her, but I stayed where I was, needing to hear what she came to say.

  “And then I met you.” Her eyes lifted to mine. “I hated you at first… and I was pretty sure you hated me too. I never meant to fall in love with you—but I did. I never meant to get pregnant, but I did. And I found myself in a position of finally finding the love of my life, and discovering I was pregnant by a different man.”

  She wiped at her eyes with the backs of her hands.

  “I should have told you right away, but it was so hard. I know that’s a crappy excuse, but I convinced myself it would be easier once the job was over. Because then you could walk away like you deserved to do.” Her hand covered her mouth, muffling a sob. “I never meant for you to find out the way you did, and it’s killing me that you think things about me that aren’t true.”

  I stepped toward her, wanting to hold her and take away her pain, but she held up her hand and stepped backward.

  “I lied to you, and I shouldn’t have, but you lied to me too.”

  I shook my head, looking into her eyes. “What did I lie to you about?”

  “You lied about your scar. You didn’t tell me you were adopted.”

  I gripped the back of my neck. “That’s hardly the same thing.”

  She stared at me. Her green eyes burned with passion, heat, and heartbreak. “We both lied, John. But I came to tell you the truth. The truth is I fell in love with you, not knowing I was pregnant. But I also fell in love with this baby. I realize it’s not an ideal situation, because no matter what happens, Austin will always be my baby’s father. He will always be a part of my life.”

  I stepped toward her, shaking my head. “You think DNA makes him a father? You think he’ll be there because his blood is in that baby?” I shook my head. “Well that’s bullshit, Tuesday! My father is the man who gave me this scar.” I flicked my thumb over my chin. “The man you met at the cabin, that was my dad. He was the man who was there at every one of my baseball games, the man who put me through college, and still calls me to talk about the Dodgers when I really know it’s because he wants to hear my voice. Just because that other guy got you pregnant doesn’t make him that baby’s father. Don’t even pretend they’re the same thing.”

  My jaw tightened with anger as I looked at her. “You want to know what the truth is? I don’t give a shit that baby isn’t mine. I know what makes a father, and it has nothing to do with blood.”

  I turned around, pressing my thumb and forefingers against my eyes, trying to calm myself.

  “I’m so sorry that happened to you,” she whispered. “And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the baby as soon as I found out. But never once have I compared the two. My father walked out on me before I was even born. Austin is this baby’s father, and he wants to be a dad. I know this is hard for you, and I’m so sorry, and I know you want me to choose, but I can’t. This baby didn’t choose this life, and I’m not going to take away her father because I fell in love with you.”

  She turned around then, and I pressed the back of my head against the wall. “Tuesday…”

  But she was already running down the steps away from me. I pushed myself from the wall to go after her, but she was already at the bottom of the stairs. “Tuesday!”

  Ginger ran halfway down the steps then turned and looked up at me, as if telling me to go after her, but I didn’t. I watched as she ran around the side of Becky’s red sports car and yanked open the door.

  She looked up for a brief moment, meeting my eyes, her face red and streaked but stunning, then she ducked into the car and disappeared from view. She slammed the car door, and I watched as they pulled out of the parking lot and turned the corner. I fought the urge to go after her, because I needed time to process all she had said. I needed to figure out what was going on inside my head.

  Ginger followed me back into the house, where I slammed the door. I didn’t know what to think anymore. I didn’t know what to do. I looked around the room, trying to find my cell phone because I needed to call someone. Lisa or Em, or someone who could help me sort this out. I walked over to the couch, sat down, and ran my hands through my hair. My eyes locked on a letter on the coffee table. I picked it up, my finger running across the name I’d hated since the day he gave me up.

  Gabriel Mucci.

  My father.

  Twenty-Three years earlier.

  “He’s here!” I shouted over my shoulder. It was the first time I’d seen my daddy
in days and days and there he was, right outside the window. He was standing big and tall because my daddy was so strong, and his face was nice and friendly, so I knew he’d kept his promise. He wasn’t talking like a monster anymore. Not like the day he had to take me to the hospital.

  Lisa was holding my hand, and I couldn’t wait for her to meet him. She would like him. Because when my daddy didn’t drink from the brown bottles, he was the best daddy in the world. He took care of me, and he read me stories, and we made big tents in the middle of the living room, and he bought me rainbow cereal and let me eat it right out of the box.

  The lady was asking him questions though, and I was scared he was in trouble. Everyone was frowning and looking at me, but I knew my daddy was being good. He told me at our last visit. He told me he was going to be good so he could get me back. He told me he would get me back, and he would buy me a big box of Legos so we could build a whole house.

  I looked over to Mr. and Mrs. Eaton because I was pretty sure I saw Mrs. Eaton crying. I hadn’t seen her cry since she came to pick me up at the other foster home, when Em cried and we had to leave her behind. Mrs. Eaton was always so happy, and I wasn’t sure what was making her so sad. She wrapped her arms around me and whispered that she was sorry, but I didn’t know why. Why did she want to hug me so hard?

  Then my dad turned around so I could just see his face, and he looked like he was crying too. My daddy never cried. Why was my daddy crying?

  A lady pulled a sheet of paper out of her bag, and he looked over at the house before he bent to sign it. He looked at me, but I didn’t think he really saw me, ’cause he didn’t smile like he normally did.

  “Daddy!” I called out, but he wouldn’t look at me anymore. He picked his things off the top of her car then started walking down the sidewalk away from me.