If Only For One Night

by Victoria Christopher Murray

  “I'm asking that question with nothing but love in my heart for you,” Cassidy said. “You can't fall for a guy who belongs to another woman because, Angelique you would die if someone did that to you. Don't do it.”

  I waited for a moment to see if Sheryl would come up with a good response, but all she did was sip, and sip, and sip.

  So, I had to face Cassidy’s words, straight-on and on my own. Her words were tough to hear, tougher to acknowledge. This wasn’t who I was. What had I been thinking? I would never get together with a married man. Never!

  I said, “Well, I guess you put a period where I'd been trying to put a question mark. Now, I feel so bad about this.”

  “You don't have anything to feel bad about.” Cassidy shook her head. “You've been through so much. I just think if you're able to put the same amount of attention on Preston that you’ve been putting on Blu, you’ll be good. I mean, if you really talk to Preston and open up and tell him about your keys and your locks, I think you’ll find that he's your soulmate.”

  Sheryl released a chuckle that sounded like she was saying yeah-right. But that was the extent of her contribution.

  Sheryl's sentiments were mine, too. At least about Preston. I had no hope for our marriage, especially since I’d been hanging out with Blu. Preston had chosen his mistress and I couldn't compete. And now, I had to question, what did I want? Was this how I wanted to live for the rest of my life?

  But Cassidy was right about Blu’s wife.

  So now, the question was what was I going to do? And the challenge was how was I going to stay away from Blu?

  CHAPTER 16

  Angelique

  “So, you understand, don’t you?”

  I sighed as I pressed my foot on the accelerator to catch the light as I made my way home. “I do,” I told Blu. “Just know that this wasn’t an invitation just for you; I invited all the sponsors.”

  “No, I get that, but we just want the Taylor Foundation to be an anonymous sponsor this time.”

  This time.

  “Okay,” I told him, hoping that I didn’t sound as disappointed as I felt that he wouldn’t be coming to any part of this weekend. Not even the gala. “But have I told you thank you?”

  Even before he spoke, I felt his smile. “Every day. And have I told you that you’re welcome?”

  “Every day.”

  We laughed together and then, he said, “I hope this weekend is everything that you want it to be. You were born to soar, and I know you and these precious girls will do just that.”

  This was where I wanted to scream, ‘Please come, at least to the gala.’ But I knew that he would never do that.

  “Call me on Monday and let me know how everything goes, okay?”

  I noticed that he didn’t ask me to call him over the weekend; I guessed he thought I’d be with Preston the whole time. So all I did was agree and then sighed so deeply that it felt like I was releasing years of pent-up frustration.

  That was all I’d been doing all week. Sighing. Because I had made it through the entire week without seeing Blu.

  Not that he had invited me anywhere and I tried not to think that maybe I’d run him off by the way I’d practically asked him to sleep with me. No, the words hadn’t come out of my mouth, but he knew what I was about to say a week ago today.

  Because…we were that connected.

  But he never mentioned it and neither had I. Besides not making plans to see each other, everything else stayed the same. He still called every morning just to say: Hey beautiful, make sure you make this a great day. And we still messaged each other through the app, and we still played Words With Friends and I still beat him, most of the time.

  But that physical space? It had been six full days. Yup, I deserved a medal because all I did was think of Blu. I thought about how he made me feel, I thought about how I wanted to spend all of my time with him. I thought about how…we were soulmates.

  At least, that was what I thought, though now, I knew for sure that I’d never find out. Because even if I no longer honored my husband, I certainly honored another man’s wife.

  “Even if her husband is my soulmate,” I whispered, right before I rounded my car around the corner and then into our driveway.

  But then, my thoughts about my soulmate shifted to thoughts about my husband when I saw Preston’s car.

  What is Preston doing home? His car hadn't seen daylight in our driveway on a workday in…forever.

  My heart began to beat in anticipation of what could be wrong. What would have Preston home and not at work? Someone died!

  I jumped out of my Lexus, raced into the house, and bumped into Preston as I ran into the living room.

  “Hey babe,” he said, not sounding at all like someone had passed away.

  “Hey,” I said, confused. “What’s wrong?”

  He frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “What are you doing home?”

  “You know, you ask me that a lot. A man could get a complex.” He chuckled. “What? You don’t want me home? You trying to sneak some guy in here?” Then, he laughed, as if the thought of me being with another man was a joke. His laughter made me want to call Blu up and tell him to come right over.

  “No,” I said. “It’s not that I don’t want you home, it’s that you’re never home.”

  “Yeah, I know, babe. And I’m going to be working on that. As soon as we close some of these big deals. The clients have been rolling in, but once we get everything settled, I’ll be all yours.” He kissed my cheek, then moved toward the kitchen.

  At first, I thought about just going up to our bedroom to pack my bag for this weekend, but I followed Preston deciding that I needed to take the time with him anyway and anywhere I could get it.

  Inside the kitchen, I leaned back a little when I saw the four cartons of Chinese food lined up on the counter.

  Wow! And, I’d just been thinking that Preston never thought about me. A bit of guilt swelled up inside. Preston had made this effort, at least so we could share a meal together, and even spend some time together afterward. After all, he was home at three in the afternoon on a Friday.

  “You picked up something for us to eat,” I said, unable to keep the surprise from my voice. “Thank you.”

  Preston laughed. “Actually the guy from Yee’s who always delivers to us, was doing a delivery next door and no one was home. He was so pissed about it. So, I figured I’d help him out and buy it so that you’ll have dinner.”

  I had to blink a few times to get his words to compute in my head. But even once I did that, I still wasn’t able to come up with any words. He hadn’t thought about me at all; his thoughts were about the Chinese delivery guy.

  I wanted to kick myself for believing and then, slap him for making me believe. But all I did was stare at him in disbelief.

  “Well…thank you…for my dinner.” I’d noticed that he hadn’t said that we’d have dinner. “So, where will you be eating?”

  “That’s why I came home. We have a big dinner tonight and I’d left the contract here.” He shook his head. “I can’t believe I did that. Gotta get them to sign it tonight.” He paused. “But at least it gave me a chance to see you.” He kissed my forehead. “So, you’re gonna just hang out at home tonight?”

  I kept my sigh inside because I didn’t want to argue. I said, “No. I’m going over to the hotel for the social tonight. I’m going to stay there for the weekend, remember?”

  His eyes fluttered like he was trying to figure something out. “What hotel?”

  Now, I was the one who was confused by his words. ”What do you mean? The Westin. Where I’m having the Black Girls Magic weekend.” I paused. “It’s this weekend.”

  “This weekend?” His frown was deep. “I thought the conference was cancelled.”

  Oh, this was hard. It was so difficult not to slap Preston, at least with my words. I had actually told him that I’d gotten the money, but this was my fault. I should’ve known when he’
d said, “That’s great, babe,” he was really saying, “Can you get off this phone?” He hadn’t heard anything that I’d told him.

  But instead of letting the hysteria rise within me, all I said was, “No, I worked it all out. I told you and I even reminded you about the gala tomorrow night. Remember, I chose this weekend because you promised you’d be free.”

  He paused and I knew he was trying to remember. “Oh, okay.”

  “Preston….”

  “What?”

  “Please, you know how important this is to me.”

  “I know.”

  “And I want you there with me.”

  “Okay, I’ll be there.”

  “And at six,” I told him. “For the receiving line.”

  “I’ll be there, babe. No worries. Tomorrow is Saturday, so it’ll be cool. Nothing from work can come up.”

  “Okay,” I said and then, I breathed a bit easier because Preston hugged me as if he were sealing his promise with this embrace.

  When he stepped back, he said, “So, you’re going to stay at the hotel.”

  I nodded. “Yeah, it’ll just be easier for me to handle everything if I’m right there.”

  “Makes sense.”

  “That’s for tonight, but for tomorrow….” I paused and looked straight at him. “I was hoping that it could be a special night...with you there.”

  When he smiled at those words, I felt like I had just swallowed the sun. I beamed. “That would be wonderful, babe.” And then, when he pulled me back into his arms and said, “We don’t get to spend enough time together and that’s what I want,” I swooned. He continued, “We’ll do that tomorrow night and I’m thinking, maybe we won’t even check out on Sunday.”

  Leaning back, I looked up at him. “Really?”

  He nodded. “Wouldn’t it be great to just stay in bed in the hotel all day Sunday? I mean, I’ll have to go to work on Monday, but….”

  “I’ll take Sunday.” I grinned.

  He bent over and gave me the kind of kiss that had made me fall in love with him. And in that instant, just after this little exchange, I knew that Preston and I could make it.

  I was breathless when I stepped back and not just because of the kiss. Preston had reminded me of how we used to be and how we could be once again.

  His grin matched mine when he said, “I better get out of here or else I’ll miss making this deal tonight and you’ll miss your social.”

  Another kiss, and then when he turned from me, I gave him a slap on the butt.

  “Do not play with me, woman,” he exclaimed before he trotted out of the kitchen.

  I laughed, feeling giddy. As I checked out the Chinese food, I marveled at how just a little attention from my husband was all that I needed, it was what I craved.

  Well, I had that and I’d have more of that from Preston tomorrow night. Now, I couldn’t wait for the gala and what would happen after.

  CHAPTER 17

  Angelique

  This was why I did what I did.

  There was only one word for the sight in front of me — amazing. The ballroom was filling up with the young girls and their parents. Seeing the girls, who were normally in jeans, dressed up in their gowns and after-five dresses made me swell with pride. With the five hundred or so people around me, I said a quick prayer to God, thanking Him for choosing me to do this before the next parent stepped up in the receiving line.

  “Mrs. Mason, this was an amazing conference,” Mrs. Johnson, Tonia’s mother said to me. “I am just so happy that Tonia has been able to participate with you.”

  I shook Mrs. Johnson’s hand and then hugged Tonia before I passed her to the next person on the line.

  We were only a receiving line of six: Me, Sheryl (the only representative of the board), and our two sponsors and their wives.

  “Mrs. Mason.” The next parents stepped up with their daughter, Lara. Her father continued, “What we learned today about our girls going to college and the financial aid programs that are available to us…this was all priceless. Thank you for all that you do.”

  Again, I smiled and shook hands and hugged. Then, passed them along to say the same to Sheryl and the others.

  Seeing all the smiles warmed me, let me know that what I was doing was right, made me feel like I was…soaring.

  But though I smiled along with the girls and their parents, inside, I could feel the tears beginning to fill up the bucket inside of me.

  I felt my phone vibrate inside my purse and I excused myself from the line. I was sure the incoming message was from Preston and before I clicked on the notification, I prayed that he was on his way.

  I clicked my message icon:

  Just want you to know that I’m thinking of you and wishing you well, always.

  I wanted to smile because of who this was, and I wanted to cry because of who this wasn’t. I responded:

  Thank you.

  He typed back right away:

  Whoa. I didn’t expect to hear from you. I thought you and your husband would be knee-deep in the celebration. Having fun?

  It was because he’d been my sounding board that I replied:

  Yes, to fun. No, to husband. He’s not here. TTYL.

  I tucked my phone back into my beaded purse and slipped back into the line. My smile was back, at least a little, because of Blu. At least he was my cheerleader.

  It was an hour of meeting and greeting and hors d'oeuvres and the open bar. When the last family made their way through the reception line, I slipped to the bar in the far corner. As the girls and their families mingled and excited chatter filled the air, I brooded as I texted my husband:

  Where are you?

  I held my phone in my hand, staring at the screen for a moment, wondering if he would respond. But unlike Blu, my husband rarely responded to my texts within moments.

  “What’s up?” Sheryl said as she sauntered over to the bar. She ordered a glass of wine then turned to back to me.

  I gave her a little shake of my head and Sheryl chuckled.

  “You didn’t really expect him to come, did you?”

  “Yes, I did,” I snapped at my best friend. “Because he’s my husband. He’s supposed to be here.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “Don’t get mad at me.”

  “I’m not mad at you, Sheryl. It’s just that you’re always so negative about Preston.”

  Now, both of her eyebrows shot up. “I’m negative?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, maybe it’s just that your husband gives me enough material to be negative about.”

  I held up the palm of my hand because what I needed most right now was support since Preston wouldn’t be here to give it to me. Didn’t Sheryl understand that?

  Rolling my eyes, I pivoted on my stilettos, then held my red gown up, so that I could trek to the ladies’ room without tripping. I pushed open the door harder than I wanted to and was a bit surprised to find that there wasn’t a line. I was grateful for that and stuffed myself into one of the stalls that certainly wasn’t made for women in ballgowns, then, hiked up my dress and squatted down — even though I didn’t have to go to the bathroom.

  I just needed a moment. Because there would be nothing smiley about my face if I had to go back into that ballroom right now.

  I shouldn’t have blown up at Sheryl; I was deflecting, which is what she would say. She would tell me that I was taking out my frustrations with Preston on her because she was the most convenient person. If she said all of that, she would be right. But damnit (and I never cursed) why couldn’t she be like Cassidy for a moment? Why couldn’t Sheryl just root for me and Preston for once? Why did she always have to play the clinical psychologist who made me feel like I was on my way to divorce court?

  Still, I owed Sheryl an apology. Because whatever she said, she was always right.

  Standing, I smoothed out my dress, then, I went to face myself in the mirror before I had to face Sheryl. After I washed my hands, I pulled out my makeup case,
though I knew that I was just trying to delay returning to the ballroom. I wasn’t sure if I was trying to give Preston time to show up and surprise me. Or if I were just trying to prolong the inevitable.

  I smoothed a bit of gloss onto my lips when the door opened and through the mirror’s reflection, I watched Sheryl step in. She walked behind me, then, stood beside me, pulling out her own makeup case.

  After a moment, she said, “Together, we look like Christmas.”

  I busted out laughing. She was right. My bright red gown next to her forest green one were not meant to be displayed side by side, I was sure. But I laughed because it did look like someone should plug us in and light us up….and that was my friend’s way of apologizing.

  I said, “I’m sorry, too.”

  Facing me, she whispered, “I just get so mad at Preston sometimes.”

  “I know. I know you’re only looking out for me.”

  “I am. And I just think you deserve,” she paused for a moment, “a soulmate.”

  I dumped my cosmetic bag back into my purse, then hugged Sheryl. “Thank you for always being in my corner.”

  “You got it.” She stepped back and took my hand. “Now, let’s go out there and you be as fabulous as you were born to be. Because no matter who’s here, you are Angelique Mason, the founder of Black Girls Magic, a major foundation in Houston, Texas that has made a difference in hundreds of girls’ lives and this is just the beginning.”

  Her words were a shot of fortitude that I rode back into the ballroom, and onto the dais. Even as I sat there, with Preston’s empty chair next to me, I remembered Sheryl’s words, and even Blu’s. I didn’t need Preston here. This was a success with or without his presence.

  At the end of dinner of catfish, sweet potato soufflé, and collard greens, the mistress of ceremonies, Delinda Mauldin, stood up and began the program. In just a few moments, I would have to give my speech and I needed to focus on that.

  I folded my hands and the light from the chandelier above, hit my ring, flashing a rainbow of colors across the tablecloth. That made me think of Preston once more. And that was the reason why, on the sly, I slid my phone from my purse and texted again: