Fat fucking chance, Kelsey thought to herself. She’d been up for hours the night before obsessing over Jason’s disturbing revelations, especially concerning Theo’s sex-capades. Well, they would have a good long time to hash things out. Theo would be stuck with her for the entire drive. She would demand answers while he couldn’t walk away or try to distract her with more sex.
The van seemed large after zooming around in compact European vehicles. Kelsey expected Theo to sit up front with the driver, but he surprised her by sliding onto the second row bench beside her. She scooted over and he just kept coming, dominating her space. She ended up sitting against the window while he sprawled his large frame across the center and right side seats. He seemed tired, but she knew he wasn’t much of a morning person. He immediately tilted his head against a headrest and by the time they got on the road, he had drifted to sleep.
So much for hashing things out. Kelsey watched him, wondering again how he’d gone from a distant idol to this all-too-real man beside her. He was far from a graceful sleeper. Well, who slept gracefully in a car? Theo’s head bobbed with the movement of the van, his lips sensual even in sleep. Then he’d jerk and she’d expect him to come awake, but he’d settle into sleep again. The driver ignored her, singing along from time to time with the radio.
Finally, after a couple hours, Theo stirred and looked out the window. “I need a cigarette.”
“You need to quit,” Kelsey said. “Cigarettes are nasty.”
“Nasty and wonderful.” He leered at her. “Like you.”
Kelsey figured there was only one thing to do, and that was to dive right into the discussion.
“Jason came to talk to me last night.”
“I’m going to jump out of the car,” Theo murmured.
“You lied to me about Minya being your only sex partner. At least according to him. In fact, he told me a lot of really interesting facts about you.”
“Pardon me,” Theo interrupted, “but Jason doesn’t know me and I don’t know him. So I would take his ‘facts’ with a grain of sand.”
“Salt.”
“Huh?”
“The expression is to take things with a ‘grain of salt.’”
Theo rolled his eyes and slouched lower in his seat. His leg made a triangle, resting on his knee. He stroked his sculpted, hairy calf. “Here is what I have to say to you, Kelsey. In most things, Jason doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Don’t be so trusting.”
“Yeah, I’m learning that. How many women were you with besides Minya? Were you with men too?”
Theo barely reacted to her anger. “I had unprotected sex only with Minya. Other women, I used condoms. This is what I thought you meant.”
“You know that wasn’t what I meant!”
“But the outcome is the same. I keep my body clean. I have no diseases. I know this because I am tested regularly. And my partners have been limited, despite what Jason believes. Cirque is a closed world.”
“You only sleep with Cirque people?”
“Does that make it better in your eyes?” he asked, sounding completely unconcerned about her answer. “I sleep with Cirque people because they...they understand. You will be the same when you’ve been here a few years.”
“After I go to the Citadel, right?”
The edge of Theo’s lips turned up. “Ah, Jason told you about le Citadel, did he? Good. Saves me the trouble.”
“Were you planning to take me?”
He gave her a demon smile. “You want to go.”
Kelsey hated his smugness, his attitude, but he was right. She wanted to hear that he’d considered her a candidate for inclusion into this secret world. That she was as good, as sexy as everyone else. Even in this, she wanted to excel.
“Fine,” she admitted. “It’s possible I want to go. But I’m not going to feel safe about any of this if you’re going to tell me lies--”
His sharp bark of laughter cut off her words. “Safe? You want to feel safe? You are in the wrong business, sweetheart. There is nothing here worth having that does not come with risk.”
Kelsey didn’t know if he was talking about the circus or about them when he said “here.” For Kelsey, “here” was the two of them, his strong legs and solid form beside her. “Here” was the irrepressible urge to touch him, to have him look on her, whether it was with approval or contempt.
Kelsey lowered her voice. “How often do you go there? To the Citadel?”
Theo followed her glance to the driver in the rearview mirror. “No need to whisper. He goes. All Cirque people go eventually. And le Citadel is such that nearly all will continue to go.”
Kelsey regarded the gruff, muscular driver. “Does he play on the dominant or submissive side?”
Again the wicked smile. “He is a switch.” Theo leaned over, turning so he was in front of her, facing her. “I’ll take you au Citadel, little girl. Don’t fear. They will love you there. You are delicious in ways you can’t even fathom. Yet.”
She sucked in a breath as Theo’s warm hand insinuated itself beneath the waistband of her pants. Instinctively, she grasped his wrist, shooting a panicked look at the driver. “He can see us in the rearview mirror.”
“Maybe so, chickadee. This is not safe, eh?”
Kelsey shook her head as Theo slid his fingers deeper, into the furrow between her legs. His thumb pressed her clit while his fingers discovered her wetness. She was so aroused, from nothing more than his nearness and his voice. She wanted to arch into his hand, but the driver-- “N--no, Theo. Not now.”
His hands never stopped their sweet torture while he kissed her lips. “Shhh...” he said in a sibilant whisper. “Let’s not be safe. It’s more fun to not be safe, no?”
“Theo...” No...no, it’s not more fun to not be safe...right? Too many no’s, too many not’s all wrapped up in her thoughts, while her body was saying only one thing, over and over--yes, yes, yes. She’d lived by the “responsible and safe” mantra all her life, but that didn’t seem so important now, with her pussy throbbing and his fingers slipping over and around her clit. His other hand clutched her thigh, holding her still, not letting her pull away or escape his intimate transgressions.
“Theo--” She tried one last time, finding it increasingly hard to form words. “We’re on a road. An interstate. Someone will see. The driver--”
“Don’t be safe,” he chided, just before he forced her mouth open with his lips, his tongue. He demanded her submission, not only with his fingers, but his kiss. She put her hands on his chest to push him away but only found herself pulling him closer. She traced the taut tendons of his neck, the softness of his ebony hair. He wasn’t going to stop. He was going to make her come right there in the van with the driver up in front. Kelsey’s gaze locked on the rearview mirror.
“Close your eyes,” Theo whispered.
I can’t. I can’t.
“Forget about him.” His voice was like silk, like white billowing fabric wrapping around her and obscuring her vision, her thoughts. His fingers were driving her mad, gently touching, stroking in just the right spots. She tried not to think about how he’d gotten so good at knowing exactly how to touch in order to make her thighs clench and her pussy throb with need. She leaned forward, resting her head on his chest, and he supported her, still teasing...stroking...
“Oh, God...” She opened her lips against his skin, feeling the pulse of his heart in the same rhythm as his fingers, driving, penetrating her. Billowing pleasure.
He hit a spot, her spot, and she grabbed his arm with a gasp. He took the peaking pleasure in her center and drew it out, fanned it with his fingertips into an impulse so great she couldn’t stop it anymore. She gripped his arm tighter and tighter, feeling rough hair and the curve of his bicep. His fingers dipped into her sheath as she ground against his palm.
Forget the driver. Forget the motorists outside. Her orgasm released and rolled over her body so hard she felt it in her breasts, her quivering shoulders, her throat a
s she gasped for air. Her pussy clamped down on his fingers, undulating in the aftermath, milking the furtive climax until the very end. She went limp against the bench seat, then risked a glance at Theo’s eyes.
They were smoldering with lust, and something more. Some challenge or daring that continued to compel her.
“See...” He held his fingers just below her nose, tracing her scent across her lips, then licked them off with a satisfied hum. “Delicious.”
The driver drove on, oblivious, or at least pretending not to notice. Help me, Kelsey thought.
It was still seven more hours to Marseille.
*** *** ***
By the time they arrived in the evening, Theo was starving. Not for food. For her.
He shied away from using her name, because even that held too much power for him. If she hadn’t been so oblivious to her effect on him, it wouldn’t have grated on his nerves so much. He wanted to drag her into the first room they could find in the new-old city house they would call home, but instead there was the maddening delay of unloading their things and stacking them in the hall. She clucked over his shoulder, a blow to his ego. He’d only told her it ached in hopes of getting her to touch him earlier in the van.
Kelsey...
Now they had to take valuable time to meet with the matriarch of the Russian strong-act family, the self-elected landlady of the house. Theo and the brusque, muscular woman were obliged to speak in a mish-mash of French and Russian to understand one another. Theo had hoped for some misunderstanding to land him and Kelsey in a room together. Sorry, but there is only one very small bed you two will have to share...
Alas, there were two private suites and they were across the length of the house from one another. Theo was given the larger one over the Russian family’s suite of rooms, while Kelsey got a smaller room down the hall beside the rooms of two male acrobats. With any luck, they were both gay.
Finally, with keys in their possession, Theo took Kelsey’s hand. “I need to see you privately. Right now.”
But Kelsey was ever practical and dutiful. “We should take our things up first. We can’t leave them here cluttering the front hallway.”
Theo looked down at their small pile of belongings. The cloying floral wallpaper and scraped linoleum of the foyer mocked him. Want her, do you? Not until she says so... “No one will bother them.” He tried not to sound as desperate as he felt, but she already had one of her suitcases in hand. With an inward groan, he leaned to pick up a box and pile it on another one. Her admonition of “Watch your shoulder!” was met with an irate growl.
They climbed the carpeted stairs, Kelsey chattering on about the antique charm of the home or some such nonsense while Theo strained to ogle her ass from behind the boxes he carried. They were halfway down the hall when one of the acrobats’ doors opened, and a short, solid blue-eyed cherub of a man-boy looked out at them. That kind of muscle definition? The highlights in his gel-stiffened hair? Definitely gay.
But then the cherub’s eyes roamed over Kelsey and lit up with a sexual appraisal Theo recognized all too well. “Kelsey Martin,” the acrobat exclaimed, open-mouthed. “Hot damn, it can’t be.”
“Wayne?” Kelsey shrieked. Jesus Christ, she was throwing her arms around the man’s neck. “I can’t believe this. I can’t believe it! I haven’t seen you in so long!”
The hug lasted way too long, and this Wayne character held her way too tight against his rock hard frame. How could he actually tumble with that kind of bulk? Theo regarded him with disdain, thinking about how low Lemaitre’s standards had dropped in recent years. The acrobat’s smile was sickeningly smarmy when he pulled away.
“Are you here with the Cirque? I had no idea you’d moved into performing.”
“Yeah,” Kelsey said. “I’m pretty new, but I love it so far.”
“I’ve been with the company a couple years now. Started out in Brillante in Vegas and recently transferred here for the new show.”
“I started out in Tsilaosa,” Kelsey said. “I just got the nod to come here this week.”
Wayne ogled Kelsey again in open flirtation. “You always did follow me around.”
Theo was going to gag. He gave Kelsey a dire look. Unruffled, she introduced the two of them with a huge smile. “Wayne, this is Theo Zamora, my new partner. We’re going to do an aerial act. Theo, this is Wayne Dalton. We trained together for years in Laguna Hills. That’s in California,” she added.
Theo scowled. “I’m not an idiot. I know Laguna Hills is in California.”
“Theo is French,” she said to Wayne. “He’s from...somewhere in France. He’s kind of secretive sometimes. And grouchy,” she added pointedly as his scowl deepened.
The man-boy slid him a look and said something to Kelsey under his breath that made her chuckle.
Oh, hell no. It was on.
“Kelsey, you want me to put these in your room or mine?” Theo asked, indicating her boxes and bags.
She looked at him like he’d taken leave of his senses. “My room, Theo. Thanks.” She turned back to Wayne. “Sorry, we just got here. Our stuff is all still down in the front hall.”
“I’ll help you,” Wayne offered, his tone so ingratiating that Theo’s hackles rose.
He waved Wayne off. “I think I can manage a few boxes.”
“But your shoulder--”
Theo silenced Kelsey with a look. “My shoulder is absolutely fine.”
“Are you in this room?” Wayne asked, indicating the room right next to his. Kelsey beamed.
“Yeah. So weird. I can’t believe after all these years we’re going to be living next door to each other. Literally.”
After all these years. How much history did these two share? Wayne Dalton was clearly older than Kelsey, and Kelsey was treating him like a revered big brother rather than an ex-lover. But Theo caught the predatory vibes that Kelsey was too guileless--or too trusting--to notice. Wayne might be playing the harmless friend, but he wasn’t harmless. Or even, Theo intuited, a friend.
Kelsey followed after Wayne, chattering away in a California-girl style of speech she didn’t use with him. Wayne lifted her other two boxes and a suitcase. Fucking show off. Theo took the last suitcase, squelching the urge to trip Wayne on the way back up.
This would never do. Theo would have to live in another house. He couldn’t bear watching from a front row seat as Wayne tried to bed Kelsey for the next few months. Or weeks. Or days. Maybe Kelsey would sleep with him later tonight, liberated by Theo’s debauching of her. No. No.
There was no fucking way he was giving Kelsey up to this cocksure buffoon, with his stupid blond highlights and over-bulked looks. Theo despised him already for his falseness, pretending to be a friend to Kelsey when he just wanted-- When he just wanted--
When he just wanted what Theo wanted.
Ugh. Theo dumped Kelsey’s suitcase in her room with the other things and left the two old friends to talk. He didn’t think Wayne would put the moves on her so soon. No, Wayne would continue to play the old pal, reminisce, help her unpack like he was her friend.
Theo would settle in and let Wayne have his time with her. He needed a cigarette anyway. Later, tonight, it would be Theo’s turn.
*** *** ***
Kelsey looked around her cozy little room. She loved it. The walls were papered in a weathered toile print that seemed so uniquely French. Two large windows were hung with light-blocking curtains so she could throw them open for sunlight, or draw them closed if she wanted to sleep. Her bed was small but comfortable, sized just right for the space. The adjoining bathroom was even smaller but it had its own charm, with the narrow shower stall and porcelain pedestal sink. A small mirror hung over it from a wide silk ribbon.
The whole house was so charmingly French. Wayne had showed her around, from the extremely clean kitchen to the walled garden to the common room where the housemates got together now and again to play cards or watch movies. Apparently the Russians kept to themselves most of the time, but W
ayne had struck up a friendship with the other acrobat in their hall, Manuel from Argentina, and the effusive Australian singer Clark who lived over on Theo’s side. Clark apparently could out-drink everyone in the house, even the four-hundred-pound Russian strongman. Kelsey was curious to meet them all.
But the most wonderful surprise of the day was seeing Wayne Dalton again. She’d had a pre-teen crush on him ages ago, when she was still struggling to make a name for herself and he was already prepping for the Olympics. He’d won two medals in his career while she’d never managed to make it past alternate. But that was old news. Now they were both Cirque performers, and she’d found a friend who reminded her of home even more than Jason. They’d reminisced about their old coaches and their Olympic experiences, and about their ambitions now that they were in the Cirque.
Kelsey had been so excited about Wayne, Theo had completely slipped her mind.
Theo, with the roving fingers. Theo with the lewd whispers in her ear as they barreled down the autoroute. She wanted to go see him. She could fool herself and say she just wanted to check out his room and see if he was settled in. But in reality, she wanted to go see him for a completely different reason…
It was late though. Kelsey decided a cold shower was a better course of action. She turned on the water and was relieved to find the pressure good even if the shower was accompanied by a persistent squeal. It took forever for the water to warm up, so she did take a bit of a cold shower before the warm and then hot water arrived to soothe and relax her. She stayed in a long time, until her fingers started to prune.
Afterward Kelsey primped in the mirror, and perfumed and stroked her skin, massaging oil into her hands and elbows. She was starting to develop longer, leaner muscles already, rather than her gymnast bulk. She knew she owed that to Jason, and to a lesser extent, to poor Minya, who had inspired Kelsey with her sylph-like physique. Kelsey knew she could do anything she wanted with her body. It was just the mental part of performing that was still a challenge to her.
She hung up her towel and went back out into her room, thinking about what she and Theo’s act would be like when it was finished, when they were performing it in the show--
Cirque Du Minuit Page 8