“Get back here, fish!” I charged toward it, but it darted away to the other side of the pond. I charged it again and it darted away again. Back and forth I sloshed, unaware that I’d hiked my skirt up so high that my audience could see more than what I’d be comfortable with.
“You there! Get out of that pond at once!” someone shouted from the edge of the pond.
But the fish was right in front of me. I couldn’t see the bracelet, but I was sure it was there. I lunged toward it and a loud whistle pierced my ears.
“Out of that water!”
“Sammy?” Max’s voice broke through the crowd of people.
I turned to look at him, soaked, with my skirt up around my hips and my cheeks hot from frustration.
“What are you doing?” He walked to the edge of the pond and held out his hand to me.
A very annoyed guard walked over beside him. “You know this woman? You both have to leave—right now. You’re not allowed to play with the fish!”
“I’m sorry. I’m sure there’s a good explanation.” Max frowned as I took his hand.
“I don’t care. Out, both of you, this second—or you’ll be arrested.”
My heart flipped at the thought. “Let’s go, Max. He’s right. We should go.”
“Okay, fine.” He wrapped his arm around me, despite all the stares he received from the people that surrounded the pond.
As we walked out through the exit, Max looked over at me. “Did you drop your phone in the pond?”
“No, it’s way worse than that.” I bit my lip, but I knew that I had to tell him. “When I tossed my coin in the pond, my bracelet must have come loose.” Hot tears coursed down my cheeks as I looked into his eyes. “I’m so sorry. I loved it so much and I wouldn’t have dropped it on purpose.”
“Oh, Sammy.” He smiled at me.
“Why are you smiling?” I wiped hard at my cheeks.
“Because you left the bracelet on the dresser this morning, and when I was packing our bags to leave tonight, I put it in your suitcase so you wouldn’t forget it.”
“What?” I stared at him. “So I was terrorizing the fish for no reason?”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were looking for it.” He shrugged.
“Ugh—I’m so embarrassed. We could have been arrested.”
“I guess you really like the bracelet.”
“I do.” I frowned. “But now what are we going to do with our day?”
“We could head back to Tokyo early. It might not be a bad idea considering how angry that guard was.”
“You’re probably right about that. You weren’t too embarrassed, were you?”
“That my wife was willing to do whatever it took to get a present back that I’d given her? Not at all.” He laughed. “Besides, your legs looked awesome. Maybe you could have dropped your skirt a little, but…” He shrugged.
“I know, I know. I didn’t even realize how high I was holding it up. I’m so foolish. Sometimes I wonder how I could even consider being a parent.”
“Are you kidding? You’d make a great mother. I bet it if it was one of our kids you dropped in there, you’d do the same thing.”
“Max, I’m serious!”
He took my hand and led me onto the bus. “So am I.” He sat down next to me, then looked into my eyes. “There is no one in this world that I would trust with my children more than you. You have nothing to worry about. Well—uh—other than the fact that they are going to be a combination of you and me, which could be very interesting.”
“Very.” I cringed. “Maybe we should adopt?”
“Stop it.” He laughed.
Chapter 27
When we got back to the hotel we gathered our things and left for Tokyo. On the train ride back I was feeling uneasy. For some reason my anxiety was acting up again. Then again, I had narrowly dodged being arrested, so it could be that I had cause to be feeling slightly anxious.
But something just felt off to me.
When we arrived back in Tokyo I decided to stop by the bookshop and check in with Yuki about the costume, while Max made sure that everything was up-to-date on the blog and confirmed our travel plans for our return to the U.S.
I arrived to the shop just in time to see Yuki and her mother in the middle of an argument. Though I couldn’t understand what they were saying, I didn’t have to. Their gestures and expressions told the story for me.
Yuki’s mother thought she was being irresponsible. Yuki was tired of shouldering so much work. It was a classic argument, but it still shocked me. I had romanticized their relationship and didn’t expect to witness an ugly moment between them.
Yuki noticed me there and sighed. She walked away from her mother and right out the door. As the door closed behind her I looked back at her mother and caught the saddest expression I’d ever seen. It wasn’t disappointment. It was longing.
All at once I understood just how painful it could be to be a parent. If Max walked away from me like that, it would destroy me, but if my own child did that? I imagined it had to be much, much worse.
I walked over to Yuki’s mother. “Are you okay?”
She nodded and said something in Japanese that I couldn’t understand. With tears in her eyes she shook her head. I opened my arms to her and hugged her. She was so stiff that I thought she might push me away, but then she hugged me back. Just as we broke the hug, Yuki walked back in.
“I’m sorry that you saw that, Samantha.” She turned to her mother and apologized. The two embraced and that sad expression disappeared, replaced by elation. Even though Yuki’s mother couldn’t explain to me what she’d been feeling, her actions and expressions illustrated the ups and downs of a mother-daughter relationship.
“Is there anything I can do to help?” I looked between the two women.
“No, it’s okay. It’s my fault. Sometimes I forget that this bookstore isn’t just a job, it’s a precious heirloom. Are you ready for tomorrow night?”
“Yes, I think I am.” I laughed. “I hope so.”
“Good. If you have any trouble with anything just let me know. Oh, and I’ll have that thing we talked about at the book signing tomorrow night too.”
“Great! Thank you so much.”
“No problem.”
For the rest of the day Max and I explored Tokyo. I decided that as much as I enjoyed Kyoto, I felt much safer with the toilets in Tokyo. We shared a delicious sushi meal, then watched a movie together at the hotel.
As I fell asleep beside him I was sure that there was nothing more satisfying to me than the sound of his subtle snoring.
In the morning I woke up to no sign of Max. After a brief panic I found a note on the dresser.
Gone to make arrangements for our anniversary dinner. Don’t you dare try to follow me.
I laughed at the thought. He really did know me so well. If I’d been awake when he left, I probably would have chased after him.
Since I had the hotel room to myself, I decided it was time to post an update on my blog. Things had been so busy lately that sometimes I found myself neglecting it. I never wanted my readers to think that I didn’t appreciate their support.
To me, the blog gave us a friendship, even if we never had the chance to meet in person.
It was the last book signing of the last leg of the last country on the book tour. As the reality hit me that this was it—we would really be going home—a mixture of emotions broiled within me. They were neither happy nor sad, but a sense of ending, a sense of bidding farewell to something that I’d never imagined would happen in my life.
As I sat down at the computer, I tried to capture in words the immense waves of feelings that washed over me. Excitement about the journey ahead crested and then dissolved into longing for the adventure that I was leaving behind. Anticipation of what might come next flowed over me, then ebbed with doubts of whether it could be anywhere near as grand as my experiences abroad had been.
My fingers began to pass over the keyboard w
ith more fervor than usual. I wanted to depict not only my determination that the future would be filled with inspiration and movement, but that the past year of my life had taught me something invaluable that would stay with me for the rest of the years to come.
By the time I finished the blog post, my fingers ached. I hadn’t typed so fast in a long time. But it was honesty, out there on the glowing screen in front of me, punctuated by the steady blink of the cursor. There it was—the period at the end of my final blog post about the book tour. It was a summation and also an invitation to join me on whatever the next steps I took might be.
Not long after I finished, Max returned with breakfast.
“Did you get my note?”
“Yes.” I smiled. “So where are we going to dinner?”
“Never mind that.”
“Where, Max?”
“I’m not going to tell you. It’s not going to work, Sammy.” He winked at me.
“Please, Max.”
“Please?” He smiled. “Well—since you asked nicely.”
I smiled with anticipation of his revealing the secret. Instead he kissed me, then tugged me toward the bed.
“Hey, that’s not what I meant!”
“Oh, no?” He frowned. “I guess we’ll just have to go sightseeing then.”
“No, this is good.” I laughed.
After some time in the hotel, we did explore the city a little more. As we entered a shop, I spotted a display of the most delicious-looking things I’d ever seen.
“What are these?” I smiled as I pointed them out to the shop owner.
“Daifuku.” He nodded. “Would you like one?”
I stared at all the sugar and cream. I knew it was a bad idea. But I wanted just one luxury while I was in Japan. I’d been very good during our trip to Kyoto.
“Yes, just one though. Unless you want one, Max?” I looked over at him.
“I thought you’d never ask. Yes, please.”
“Two, then.” I smiled at the owner.
Max and I ate them together on a bench outside the shop. With all our moans of appreciation, the people that passed by must have thought some strange things about us.
“We shouldn’t have eaten that.” I shook my head.
“Oh yes we should have. It was delicious. It’s okay to splurge once in a while, Sammy. Besides, I’m sure it’s not that bad.”
“Maybe not. Anyway, we should get back to the hotel. I need to get dressed for the book signing—and figure out what you have planned for tomorrow night.”
“Oh, this again?” He laughed.
“Yes, this again.” I kissed his cheek. “So where are we going?”
“Maybe we’re not going anywhere. Maybe I planned an intimate candlelight dinner in our hotel room.”
“Oh, that sounds lovely.”
“Maybe I planned for us to eat on the moon.” He grinned.
“Stop it, Max!”
“I’m not telling you.”
“If you say so.”
Chapter 28
As Max and I walked back to the hotel, I felt pretty confident that he’d revealed the truth about our anniversary dinner when he said it was going to be at the hotel. I thought that would be a perfect time to show off my new outfit for him.
When we got back to the hotel I changed in the bathroom so that I could fix my hair and add a little make-up. As I started to pull on my skirt, all at once I was sick to my stomach. It wasn’t as bad as before, but enough for me to take notice. I sighed as the realization hit me again, that I really was looking forward to getting home and slowing down a bit. It seemed my body was trying to convince me of that, anyway.
I swallowed hard and focused on zipping my skirt. It didn’t matter to me if I was getting sick again; I had to be there for the book signing. There was no way I was going to miss it.
Once I was dressed I splashed some cold water on my face. When I looked at myself in the mirror I noticed that I was a little pale. Maybe Max was right and I’d done too much in Kyoto instead of resting. Still, the book signing had to go on.
I grabbed the bottle of herbal pills that Yuki had given me and downed two. I hadn’t taken any more of them since the cat incident, but they had helped me earlier.
When I stepped out of the bathroom Max studied me. “You’re not feeling well again, are you?”
“I’m fine, Max.” I grabbed my shoes and sat down to put them on.
“No, you look pale. Is your stomach acting up?”
“Max, I’m fine. I have the book signing tonight.”
“Sammy, it’s okay to be sick. We can postpone it or cancel it so that you can rest.”
“Absolutely not. I never should have eaten all that sugar. It’s my fault. I’m not contagious and I will not disappoint the people who support me.”
“I understand—I know how much you care about your readers—but what if this isn’t just from the greasy food? What if something else is going on?”
“Like what?”
“It could be stress-related. Last time you got sick it was right after the book signing, now you’re sick right before it.”
“You think I’m faking it?” I looked up at him with surprise. “I’m not faking anything.”
“Of course I don’t think that. Your body could be responding to stress that you’re not even aware of. Really. You need to think about it.”
I opened my mouth to tell him just what I thought about it, when I realized that he might be right. Everything was about to change, and all the pressures of going home were amplified with the questions I’d faced at the first book signing. It actually did make perfect sense.
“You might be right, Max. That is some really good insight. Let’s talk about it more after the book signing, and maybe tomorrow I’ll meditate and see if I can bring things into focus.”
“I still think the best idea is for you to see a doctor.”
“I hear you, but if it’s stress-related then it will be much worse if I skip this book signing. I’d regret that.”
“I see your point. But there’s a pharmacy right next to the hotel. I think I remember hearing that they’ll give you a little assessment if you ask them to.”
“Do we have time, though?” I glanced at my watch.
“Yes, and I still need to pick up a few more post cards. Why don’t I do that, while you go to the pharmacy? Just to make me feel a little better?”
“Okay, I can do that.” I smiled and kissed his cheek.
The pharmacy was small and crowded. As I stood in the endless line, thoughts ran through my mind about what could be causing me to feel sick again. I wanted to be able to give the pharmacist as much information as possible.
Max left to visit a few nearby shops to pick up some things we needed before our flight home.
By the time I stepped back outside, it was ten minutes later than we’d planned on leaving for the book signing.
Max hailed a taxi as quickly as he could. Once we were inside he turned toward me. “What did they say?”
“I didn’t get to see anyone. It was too busy, Max. I would have been waiting in line forever.” I looked away from him as I spoke, and my stomach fluttered with the thought of not being completely honest with him. It was unusual, and I wasn’t sure how bad to feel about it.
“Oh, that stinks. Well, we’ll see how you’re feeling in the morning, I guess.”
“Yes, we will.” I swallowed hard and tried to calm my racing heart. “The important thing is to get the book signing done.”
“Okay. If you need anything, just let me know.”
We arrived just in time for the book signing. To me, that was late, but I did my best not to stress. I took in some deep breaths and put all thoughts aside except for the event that was about to take place.
Yuki ushered me to the podium in front of yet another crowded audience.
I went through all the same talking points as I’d done for the first one, but when it came time to talk with the audience, I made the decis
ion not to open it up for questions. I’d learned a lesson from the earlier event. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I seemed to be forming my own little speech.
As she had before, Yuki translated for me.
“I think one of the most important things I’ve learned during my visit to Japan is just how important relationships are. Whether it’s a marriage, or a business partnership, or a mother and child, a relationship is a promise. It’s one person saying to another—I choose you and I will continue to choose you for the duration of our relationship.
“It can be easy to turn away from one another when we have moments of difficulty, but the true power—the essence of love—is in turning away from that desire, and instead, embracing the relationship. If it’s valuable to you, then it’s worth being a little uncomfortable, just to get back to the place that you started. We can’t let little things drive us apart, when together is the strongest that we can be.”
I looked over at Max, who was watching me with a slight smile on his face. “We have to be willing to accept change in our relationships and accept the surprises in life in order to keep moving them forward.” I took a deep breath before continuing on.
“I talk a lot about empowerment, about self-worth and confidence, but having the confidence to stand alone doesn’t mean that you have to be alone. It means that you should be able to embrace those that you love the most and allow them to embrace you back.” I looked out at the women sitting in front of me and smiled widely. “Thank you so much for joining me tonight. I look forward to meeting all of you.”
As the session closed I tried not to think about the churning in my stomach. My hand trembled just a little more with each book I signed.
After I was done, Yuki bounced up to me with a wide smile. “That was a beautiful speech. Now, are you ready for some old-fashioned Japanese cooking? Mom is making sushi!”
I clapped my hand over my mouth. My stomach churned even more. After a moment I shook my head. “I’m so sorry, Yuki, but I don’t think I can make it to dinner.”
“Why not?” She frowned.
“No.” Her mother shook her head as she walked up to me. She patted her hand on top of mine. “You rest.”
Sammy in Japan (Single Wide Female Travels #8) Page 9