Love Engineered

by Jenna Dawlish

  “For some time I saw her watching me when she thought I didn't notice. She became over friendly with me. Taking hold of my hands and not letting go for a long time. That sort of thing. One night she drank a little more wine than normal and propositioned me. She demanded that I visit her bedchamber. I couldn't. I have high moral standards, of course. It would go against everything I was ever taught, or believe in, even if I were attracted to her. She is, after all, a very beautiful woman.”

  Charles had listened quietly but couldn't hold back any longer. “It's amazing to me how she manages to convey such maidenly graces, when she holds such carnal knowledge and behaves in such an immoral way.” He thought back to the last time he had seen her at the Assembly. While she was laughing and dancing, her lackeys were ordering his friend out of the country. He felt his heart quicken in anger.

  “Yes, but I suppose she lies even to herself. When she propositioned me it was like . . .” he paused again to find the right words, “It was like she was another woman, a different woman; as if she were possessed. I'm not sure if it was the wine or not.”

  “What happened then? When you refused, I mean?”

  “She was angry. Told me if I didn't do as she wished then she would make me pay. I didn't believe she meant it, especially with the amount of wine she had drunk. I thought she would forget about it the following morning.”

  “And did she?”

  “No. She gave me one last chance. But I refused again.”

  Risinger stood up, went to the window and looked out.

  “She ordered me off her estate and her last words to me – I shall never forget – she said, “You will live to regret your decision forever, Mr Risinger.” I haven't regretted it but she has made my life extraordinarily difficult.”

  He remained at the window. After a while, Charles said, “Thank you for telling me. I'm shocked, but your disclosure has confirmed my worst suspicions about her. I had already noticed that she speaks and acts in a most unladylike manner sometimes. It's almost as though the mask slips on occasion.”

  Risinger turned around. “I knew you were a perceptive man. There is one more thing you should know. Miss Thomas has not had so many lovers for such a long time without consequences of her actions.”

  “Do you mean . . . ?”

  “Yes, she has a child, a daughter,” he said. “It was a few years ago. She does not look after or acknowledge the child herself, of course; it’s being brought up by a family in a village near her estate. A childless couple.”

  “But who is the father? Why doesn't she look after the child? Surely she should at least support it, even if she does not acknowledge it.”

  “I do not believe she knows who the father is. It could be one of many men I suppose.”

  “How did you learn of this?”

  “It was by chance, actually. A few months after I was seen off the Glazebrook estate I ran into a former footman of hers in London. He told me. He said he left her service because she made demands on him, and he a happily married man who was devoted to his wife. It seems no man is safe around her. I can assure you though, I looked into what this man told me. I tried to obtain proof of the adoption, but it seems Miss Thomas has paid off many people in order to hide her mistake. They would all speak to me in private, and confirmed it; but officially, they would admit nothing.”

  Charles stayed silent. It was too much to take in. This woman (he couldn't call her a lady now) had fooled him. On the outside she was all modesty, charm and affability. But he knew the truth. He scolded himself; he was the one who had introduced her to his sister. It was most regrettable.

  “I see what you're thinking. You cannot believe that a lady could abuse her position so; could behave in such an unseemly and immoral way.”

  “I find it all incomprehensible. But I do not understand why you find it embarrassing. You have followed your principles – you always did when we were at school. You were the perfect pupil. Everyone said it.”

  “Thank you Charles, your kind words are gratefully received. Many gentlemen who might find themselves in the same position wouldn't have chosen the moral path I have. Indeed, if I had given into her, I'm sure she would have adorned me with gifts and money until she grew tired of me, then I would be in a much better position than I'm in now.”

  “You honour yourself by not giving in to her.”

  Risinger gave a small tip of his head. “Thank you. I always try to do the right thing.”

  Charles didn't stay much longer. They agreed to meet one more time before Mr Risinger was to travel to Liverpool. Charles decided that he must take immediate action. He wasn't going to allow his sister's reputation to be sullied by Miss Thomas. He must put a stop to their friendship without delay. He would also demand that Miss Thomas relinquishe her stranglehold on his friend.

  He decided to go straight to see her and concluded that there was no reason to delay, even though the hour was late. But unfortunately when he called, she wasn't at home, having gone out for the evening.

  Overnight, he didn't lose his determination and called again mid-morning. Again, she was out and he started to wonder if she was ever at home.

  . . .

  When she arrived home from a day visiting friends, Louise was pleased to hear that Mr Lucas had called that morning as well as the night before, although she was a little dismayed that she had been out both times. It was unfortunate luck. She was told he would return later that afternoon in the hope that she would speak with him. Her heart murmured the reason why he had called on her, and although things were moving faster than she expected, there wasn't a doubt now in her mind that this was what she wanted. He obviously wanted to see her; calling twice within such a short period of time wasn't to be sniffed at.

  A thrill went through her. She tried to remember the times she had watched in amusement all the other women at balls, at social events and such, where they flirted and tried to gain the attentions of the one gentleman they admired. She tried to remember the small encouragements they gave to the men. What subtleties did she need to perform to show this man that any special notice he showed her was welcome and that his addresses to her would be accepted?

  It was a new sensation. She liked it. Succumbing to her feelings – giving into them – was delicious. She felt free, unrestrained, for the first time a real woman.

  Perhaps his mother had spoken to him with discretion, dropping hints that she was willing to receive and accept his affections. She would soon find out, because as she stood near the window on the second floor, she heard the bell and hurried herself to the drawing room to receive him.

  Chapter 10

  The servant announced Mr Lucas, and Louise curtsied her welcome. He in turn gave a curt bow and they both waited for the door to close before either spoke.

  She began in an eager voice and to fill the awkward silence. “Mr Lucas, I'm very pleased to see you,” she said, stepping forward a little. He seemed surprised and took a step back, but there was no further escape, he was right by the door.

  “Will you not sit down?” she indicated to the sofa he was near.

  He sat at one end, but remained silent. All he could hear was the loud tick of the clock.

  He glanced at her; she was watching him closely with a look of expectation.

  Charles suddenly felt foolish. Miss Thomas looked perfectly respectable: a soft smile on her face, dressed in cream muslin. Despite his reason for being there and his knowledge of the truth, he thought her becoming all the same. But he wouldn't let her beauty detract from the task.

  Eventually he muddled something together. “Miss Thomas, I . . .” he looked at her and shook his head. “I have come here today on a specific matter, one of great delicacy.”

  “Indeed?” She smiled encouragingly at him. Did she have no shame?

  He cleared his throat. “Yes. Great delicacy. I do not know how to start. I have a great many things to say to you. I wish to tell you how I . . . feel about you. I mean what I think of you.” He rubbe
d his forehead with the tips of his fingers as though trying to clear his thoughts. When he looked up, she was sitting next to him on the sofa.

  She looked directly into his eyes. “I see your struggle to find the words. I can help you. You need not be afraid of saying anything to me.” Then she gently put her hand in his.

  He stared back at her for a moment, blinking several times. Was she really doing to him what he thought? What he dreaded? He had never been the recipient of such forwardness from a woman before. Never in all his life could he believe that someone who was on the outside all ladylike manners could be so brazen. He had come here today to end a friendship and to try and help his friend – he hadn’t expected this.

  The exact same thing that had happened to William Risinger.

  A wave of revulsion seared though him. He ripped his hand away and stood up to place as much distance between himself and her. The over-furnished room wouldn't allow anywhere near enough.

  She looked up at him unsure, and he began to speak. “You're too forward madam. Do you forget your basic manners?”

  She shook her head. “Sir, I didn't mean to offend you. I saw your struggles to speak. I wished to help you; to make it easier for you.” She spoke in a low tone. So feminine. So soft. The flutter of her eyelids betrayed maiden innocence. Bashfulness. But he knew the truth. It was all a facade.

  “Sir, I have . . .” she faltered for a moment, but the desire of her heart pushed her forward and she was no longer afraid to speak. “I have felt for you, from the first moment we met, the strongest attraction, and although it took me some time to realise that I was in love with you, love you I do.”

  She looked at him to gauge his reaction. He didn't move. But he knew his eyes betrayed the surprise he felt.

  “Mr Lucas . . .” she stood up and stepped forward. “Mr Lucas?”

  He took a deep breath as if to control a great emotion. “You're mistaken Miss Thomas. You seem to assume that I have come here today to declare my feelings for you,” he said with deep frown. “But my feelings couldn't be further from your own.”

  “I had realised that the strength of your sentiment didn't match my own yet.” She stepped forward and placed her hand on his arm. “But I think given time, maybe . . .”

  He snatched his arm away from her, and flashed her a piercing look, “Do not touch me.”

  His angry tone made her frown and then blush. “I'm sorry. I realise that I have said unusual things for a woman. But I have been so long on my own, and without relatives, I find I must do everything for myself.”

  “You are too forward. You seem to think that I have come here today with a view to –” he struggled to find the words. “A view to intimacy. But I have come here to tell you that you're no longer to see my sister nor any other member of my family.”

  She stared at him for a few moments and blinked. “I do not understand. Surely, declaring my sentiments to you couldn't cause you to end my acquaintance with your family?”

  “No, my reasons are that I know of your disgusting past and I have come today to tell you how much I dislike you for it.”

  Louise stood, her mouth gaping open for a moment. “What disgusting past?” Then after a moments’ pause she said, “You do not like me?”

  “No.” There was complete honesty in his voice.

  She turned away and remained silent for a few moments. This was not what she was expecting. Disappointment overwhelmed her. It oppressed her. “I do not see how your dislike of me should affect my friendship with Jane. She likes me well enough, even if you do not.”

  “It's not only my dislike of you that makes me say this. Do you think any moral man of sense would allow his sister to be friends with the likes of you? It's your conduct and the things I have learned about you from William Risinger. I didn't want to believe him, but he was right.”

  She spun around. “Mr Risinger? What is he to do with it?”

  He looked away from her but she caught the look on his face: disgust.

  “He has told me the truth about you.”

  “The truth? Whatever he speaks, I doubt it would be the truth.”

  “He has told me enough of the matter between the two of you. Your treatment of him. Your unreasonable demands. But you have confirmed everything he told me by your behaviour just now.”

  She slumped down into the nearest chair. “I cannot see that what happened between Mr Risinger and myself should cause you to demand an end to a friendship. What has he been saying about me?”

  “You ask me that?”

  “Yes. Tell me what he has said. I demand it.”

  “I had my doubts for a while, but you confirm everything in your manner and behaviour. He told me about your string of lovers, but I did not think you were capable of it at first.”

  “Lovers? I have had no lovers. How dare he and you accuse me of such a thing?” Then she muttered, “I should have made him leave immediately.”

  “You do not deny that you have ordered Mr Risinger out of London?”

  “No,” she said with a defiant tilt of her chin. “I do not deny it. And if he's not out of London by the deadline I have set, then he will pay dearly.”

  “I cannot believe I'm hearing this.”

  “Believe it: for he deserves everything I inflict on him now. He is an evil, conniving man, and the sooner he is gone the better.”

  Mr Lucas shook his head. “Everything you say makes me dislike you even more.” With a hard gaze he continued, “I suppose you will not deny the truth about the child you have kept near your estate?”

  Louise went white. “He told you about the child?” she whispered.

  “Yes, how you had the child adopted, how you abandoned your own bastard daughter.”

  Louise shook her head. “I cannot believe he told you about the child, but how did he know? I do not deny that there is a child being brought up in Devon, that I had her adopted out, but Marie is not mine.” She gave a small laugh after she stopped speaking as if to add weight to her argument.

  He seemed to not hear her last few words. “Yet you have the impertinence to declare yourself to me. To throw yourself at me in the same way you did to Mr Risinger! I thought I had seen and heard it all living in London, but you – you're the worst specimen of a woman I have ever come across.”

  “I wasn't throwing myself on you.” Tears pricked her eyes and she struggled to suppress them.

  “You were, and you did. I find it deplorable that you could do such a thing.”

  “I have no father or brother to assist me in telling you of my favour towards you. I have to do such things myself. But what is wrong with telling you that I love you and that I wish to become your wife?”

  He paused and stared at her for a moment. “Then you will be sorry to know that you're furthest in my mind for what constitutes a wife, indeed even a lady.”

  Her disappointment turned to anger, “Why – because you believe me to be a harlot?”

  “Yes.”

  “You believe Mr Risinger?”

  “Yes.”

  She scoffed, “That man! I should have known the moment I heard he was in your acquaintance that he would cause trouble. He always does. Perhaps you are colluding with him?”

  “Colluding to do what?”

  “He has never done anything honest in his life. Nothing. Yet I believed you were different. You are at the forefront of your profession, and therefore the world. Why would you seek to become associated with a man with his criminal intent?”

  “Criminal? He is no criminal.”

  “He tried to defraud me a few years ago.”

  “I do not believe you. I knew him at school and he was a model student. You are simply trying to hide the fact he has uncovered your dark secret.”

  “No, I am not. How dare he tarnish my character! It is obviously the only way he can get at me now. He is the one who is the liar and I'm sorry to say he has deluded you. Just like he did me.”

  “I know enough to know when I see a woman who is
so rich she believes she can control everything and everyone. You thought you could do the same with me. You're wrong. From the moment I met you, you showed yourself to be a woman who distinguishes herself by embracing those things that make her more male than female. What interest would I have in your estate? Do you think I would have the time, or any inclination to have any desire for it? Do you think I would give up my life's work to become as interfering as you are with your tenants' petty affairs? It would be a half life, a – ”

  “Stop!” she cried. “Please stop!” Tears now fell freely as she looked up at him. “If you have any compassion for me as a – as a human being, then please I beg you to stop.”

  He had by no means finished, but for a moment he saw the pathetic creature in front of him, the one Risinger had described, and he halted.

  He turned away from her. He knew he had spoken harshly. He had never spoken to a woman in such a way. Perhaps it was his bitter disappointment that she wasn't the woman he once thought she was. It all could have been so different. He had felt an unusual tug of attraction to her all those months ago – even a few minutes ago when he had first entered the room.

  He turned back to her. Still her hands were covering her face. He must get this over with quickly. “Miss Thomas, you're not to come to my house or have any contact with any member of my family. Is that clear?”

  She nodded.

  “Then I shall go. I have done what I meant to do today.”

  She looked up at him. “And I cannot see how we can continue without further argument. You choose not to believe me and there appears no way I can persuade you otherwise.”

  Chapter 11

  Charles closed the drawing room door and with quick steps made his way to the hallway. The doorman handed him his hat and coat just as the doorbell rang.

  “Excuse me sir,” the man said and he walked to the door to answer it.

  The caller, a blond gentleman, looked familiar, but Charles wasn't inclined to find out who this man might be and, with a quick nod, swiftly left.

  “Afternoon Allan,” Lord Philip said.