Bridge of Mist and Fog

by Nikki Broadwell

  “I wonder how long Wolf was screwing with your mind. You said he was around you the last time it happened, right?”

  Fehin raised his listless gaze to hers. “I didn’t know it at the time.”

  “He was about to rape me.”

  Fehin blinked once and then balled his hands into fists. “I know that. Why do you think I shot him?”

  ***

  By the time Carla got home Fehin was sleeping again. Airy had been waiting for her. “Fan’s doing her homework,” she told Carla once she’d hung up her coat. “If you want us out of here I would understand.”

  Carla kicked her shoes off and headed to the refrigerator. She took out an opened bottle of white wine, poured herself a glass, took a sip and then moved to the couch in the living room, sitting down with her legs curled under her. “I’ve gone through some bad times in my life. I think I can handle this.” She looked at Airy who hadn’t moved from her place by the door. “Why don’t you come sit down,” she said patting the seat next to her. “I talked to my friend and found a place for Fehin. It’s a two-month program. They’ve had great results. But Fehin has to want this, Airy. Without his complete participation it won’t do any good at all.”

  “Can I have a glass of wine?”

  “I thought you said you didn’t drink.”

  “Well, I’ve never had a drink but it looks kind of good,” she replied, eyeing the frosted glass.

  “Help yourself.”

  Airy got a glass out of the cupboard and then poured in the perfume- like liquid and took a long swallow. “It’s good,” she said, carrying it over to the couch.

  “This is an Italian wine that I like. It’s called Soave.” Carla placed her glass on the coffee table and turned toward Airy. “We take him tomorrow. In the meantime you need to have a long talk with him. Find out if he really wants to quit.”

  “He’s miserable right now. I know he feels terrible about what he did. And he seems sick.” Airy took another sip of wine, savoring it in her mouth before swallowing. It was making her feel slightly light-headed but in a good way.

  “He’s in withdrawal. They’ll help him with that.”

  “Will I get addicted to this?” she asked, holding out the glass.

  Carla laughed. “I don’t think so. Wine isn’t like heroin. But if you start drinking an entire bottle every night it could be cause for alarm.”

  Airy finished off her glass and then took it into the kitchen and washed it out. “I’m going to check on him,” she said, heading toward the bedroom.

  “I’m making pasta for dinner. He might feel up to eating some.”

  Airy nodded and then opened the bedroom door and closed it behind her.

  Fehin was awake and sitting up. “I heard your plan for me,” he said.

  Airy was on her way to the bed but stopped when she heard his tone. “Then I guess you heard Carla say that you have to be into this for it to work. Do you want to quit?”

  Fehin lifted his shoulders and let out a long sigh. “Of course I want to quit.”

  “Well then, what’s the problem?”

  “I don’t know if I can.”

  Airy moved the rest of the distance to the bed and sat down next to him. “That’s the whole point, Fehin. You need support and help to quit. You may have to do some kind of outpatient program, like AA or something.”

  “Right now I feel like shit.”

  Airy reached for his hand. “You went through this once before. You can do it again. I’m telling you, without Wolf around I know you’re going to get through this way easier.”

  “I hope you’re right.” Fehin pulled his hand away and curled up on his side.

  Airy watched him for a while and then went to take a shower. With water sluicing down her back she let the tears flow. No one would hear her sobs over the sound of the water.

  42

  Fehin turned on his side and reached for his phone. It was close to eight a.m., the time he was supposed to be in therapy. He jumped out of bed and pulled on his jeans and then ran his fingers through his hair. While buttoning his shirt he glanced toward the other bed where his roommate slept. It was empty and still made up. Maybe he’d been released. The two of them hadn’t spoken much. The guy, whose name escaped him, was younger than he was and seemed to have a death wish. He’d managed to nearly blow off his hand while heating up some concoction he planned to shoot up. Fehin felt sorry for him.

  He’d been here for over a month now. His days consisted of eating, therapy sessions and taking drugs that were supposed to help with the withdrawal. Despite that he felt more clear-headed than he had in a long time. Airy had not come to visit and he missed her. He didn’t hold out much hope for their relationship.

  He was late to group therapy and slipped in, trying to be invisible. “Glad you could join us,” the counselor said.

  These sessions consisted of each person baring his or her soul to the others. Sometimes there was crying, sometimes anger and sometimes it was just plain boring. Fehin hadn’t said much so far since he didn’t think it would be prudent to reveal that he came from 2468 to fulfill a destiny and that he killed his sorcerer brother for nearly raping his girlfriend who was able to talk to trees. He chuckled to himself as these thoughts went through his head.

  “Will you share this morning, Fehin?”

  Fehin’s cheeks grew hot. “Um…I have nothing to say.”

  “Can you tell us what led you to use?”

  Fehin looked around at all the eyes trained on him. “I guess the first time it was because I needed to learn about life on the street.”

  “And how did that go for you?”

  “I got off the stuff without any help from you,” Fehin said defiantly.

  The counselor blinked but other than that there was no visible reaction to what Fehin had said.

  “And this time?”

  Fehin looked down noticing that his shoelaces weren’t tied. He bent over to tie them. “I don’t know,” he mumbled.

  “You don’t know why you started again?”

  “That’s right. I think it had to do…” Fehin trailed off, realizing he had nearly revealed that he had a brother. Not a good idea.

  “Had to do with what?”

  “Pressure from my girlfriend, from work, you know the drill,” he lied.

  The counselor watched him for a while without speaking and then turned to someone else.

  At the end of the hour Fehin practically sprinted from the room.

  Later when the attendant came with his pills he waved his hands, trying to distract him. When nothing happened he took the pills the man held out and swallowed them obediently. Shit, he thought to himself. Is my magic ever coming back? That was the real reason he got into drugs to begin with. Those months after he left Airy in Colorado were the worst of his life. If his magic didn’t come back he couldn’t be with her. It was too humiliating. Why was he part of a destiny when he couldn’t do a damn thing to help?

  ***

  Airy was waiting for him out front the day Fehin was released, her wide smile making his heart hurt. It had been over two months since he’d seen her. Christmas had come and gone, a sad affair here in the rehab center. When she hugged him he hugged her back but he knew that he wouldn’t be staying with her for long.

  “I missed you!” she said in the taxi. “They told me not to come visit. I hope you realized I wasn’t allowed.”

  “I knew,” he said, turning toward her. Her wide eyes looked very green. He had a strange sensation in his lower abdomen as though a magnet was pulling him toward her. “Are you doing that?”

  “Doing what?”

  “Never mind,” he said, turning to look out the window.

  Airy reached for his hand. “How was it?”

  “It was all right. I’m glad to be out of there, though.”

  “Carla is cooking a special dinner.”

  “She shouldn’t have gone to any trouble. I’m only staying one night.”

  “What are you talking
about?” Airy’s clear-eyed gaze made his head hurt.

  “I have to get a job, Airy. I can’t hang around without my…” he glanced at the driver, “magic,” he whispered. “What we were supposed to do depends on that and since I don’t have any I’m moving on.”

  Airy looked struck, her eyes wide. “Don’t you love me?”

  “I love you, but that’s not enough.”

  “The hell it isn’t,” she said loudly, causing the driver to check them out in his rear view mirror. “You’ll get it back. I know because I’ve had a bunch of premonitions.”

  Fehin scoffed. “You’re having premonitions? With me in them?”

  “Yes, with you in them,” she hissed. “And you have your…abilities intact,” she finished, glancing toward the front seat. “You can be such an asshole.”

  Fehin laughed so hard he had to double over. “Hearing you swear is totally weird. When did you start that?”

  Airy sat up straight and folded her hands in her lap. “You bring it out in me,” she said primly. And then she giggled.

  ***

  Fehin rolled over and took Airy in his arms. He kissed her and then moved his hands across the top of her T-shirt.

  “Let me help you with that,” she said, pulling it over her head. And then he felt soft warm skin under his fingers instead of rough cotton.

  Her hands were on him, her breath in his ear. He responded to what she was doing. They were underwater, the murmur of her rhythmic breathing, the sound of his own breath, blue-green lights going off inside his skull. She smelled of sweat and flowers.

  ***

  “Fehin? Are you planning to get up today?” Airy was staring down at him with her hands on her hips.

  He sat up. “What time is it?”

  “Nearly noon.”

  Fehin shook the sleep from his head. “I think I need a major dose of caffeine.”

  “Coming right up, your highness.” Airy flounced out of the room leaving the door open.

  He heard her in the kitchen as he made his way to the bathroom. When he looked in the mirror he was surprised to see how bright his eyes looked. He actually looked happy. He pulled on his jeans and went to join her.

  “Why did you let me sleep so late?” he asked accepting the cup she handed him.

  “This is your first day back. I figured you needed your beauty rest.” She poured a cup of coffee for herself, added cream and sat then down at the table next to him.

  “I had the most amazing dream. We were…well, you know…you were touching me and I was…” Fehin shook his head smiling. “Anyway, it felt like we were underwater.”

  Airy’s level gaze met his. “That wasn’t a dream. You woke me up in the middle of the night. It felt like that to me too.”

  “We did it last night?”

  “Yes, Fehin. Is that so shocking?”

  “I was just surprised since we hadn’t really talked or…”

  She stared at him. “Sometimes talking is overrated.”

  “Did you know I was asleep?”

  Airy laughed. “You were pretty amazing for being asleep, Fehin.”

  43

  Carla glanced out the window and then turned to Airy and Fehin. “There are cops out there. I suggest you two go into the bedroom.”

  It was March now and they’d all relaxed about Wolf’s death so this came as a surprise. Airy met Fehin’s gaze and then they hurried toward the bedroom.

  “I told you I shouldn’t have stayed here,” Fehin whispered once they were inside. “If you get in trouble because of me, I’ll…”

  Airy put her hand over his mouth. “Stop talking,” she hissed. She grabbed a glass from the bathroom counter and then pressed it against the door and put her ear up to the other end.

  Fehin stared at her, puzzled. “What are you doing?”

  “Shut-up,” she mouthed.

  The murmur of voices went on for some time and then finally the sound of the front door closing. A few seconds after that Carla knocked on the bedroom door. “You can come out now.”

  “What did they say?” Airy asked, opening the door.

  “You couldn’t hear through the glass?” Fehin chuckled, following her into the living room.

  Airy gave him a look. “It didn’t work as well as it should of,” she whispered.

  Airy and Fehin had spent the last month going over the possible meanings of a bridge while they waited for Fehin’s magic to return. They walked every day and went to the library on campus, researching the politics of the past ten years and trying to come up with an answer that made any sense.

  Once a week Fehin went off to his Narcotics Anonymous meeting, coming back in a darker mood than when he left. When Airy asked he said it saddened him to see so many people struggling. Other than that he wouldn’t talk about it. She worried that he’d be tempted to use again but when she asked him, he shook his head vehemently. “I’m not going down that road ever again. And if I do you have my permission to kill me.”

  Fehin’s magic was still absent, a glaring problem that obviously plagued him. Every day Airy asked him what to do and every day he said he didn’t know. Airy’s magic was stronger than ever, her connection to Fehin reaching mystical proportions. She felt linked to him all the time, even when they were apart, which wasn’t often, and always knew what he was thinking and feeling. When he talked about getting work she told him she didn’t want him wandering around where the cops could find him. But in reality she couldn’t stand the idea of being parted for even an hour. After everything they’d been through she just couldn’t risk it.

  Carla glanced at the two of them and then went to sit at the kitchen table. “They finally linked Wolf and Fehin, which led them to the construction site. I guess Wolf knew someone at the college? That’s how they knew where to find you, Fehin. And you put this address on your application.”

  “Damn it!” Fehin said loudly. “I can’t believe they didn’t find me sooner.”

  “What did you tell them?” Airy asked, moving to a chair next to Carla.

  “I said he’d been living here for a while but I hadn’t seen him in several weeks.”

  Airy felt like all the air had been sucked out of her lungs. She leaned over to catch her breath.

  “Airy, what’s wrong?” Fehin was by her side in an instant, his hand on her back.

  “She’s hyperventilating,” Carla said, unconcerned. “It’ll pass in a moment. They could come back with a warrant to search the house since they don’t have any other leads,” she continued. “I think you should take my car and the camping gear and drive west.”

  “Neither one of us know how to drive,” Airy said, glancing at Fehin.

  “It’s an automatic, about as simple as it gets. I’m sure you can manage if I explain a few things.”

  Fehin frowned. “But won’t they come looking for us?”

  “I suppose they could but these sorts of deaths happen all the time. It could have been another drugged out addict who shot and killed Wolf. And they don’t have the gun or the prints. Actually I’m surprised they’re still working the case.”

  “What about the other two people?” Airy asked, worried.

  “Those two are totally out of it,” Fehin said. “They’re the ones who provide the drugs down there. They could be busted for that. Even if they said something no one would believe them.”

  “They might be in jail already,” Carla added. “Perhaps that’s why the cops are still looking into it.”

  “Well, Fehin?” Airy said, taking hold of his hand. “Do you still think it’s a good idea to head off without me?”

  Fehin laughed mirthlessly. “That plan was gone a month ago.”

  “I’m glad to hear it,” Carla said. “You two need to stick together. Whatever is going on has made it very clear that you belong together. Don’t squander what’s been given freely by the universe.”

  Airy laughed. “I like that. I wish we didn’t have to leave though. I’ll really miss you.”

  Carla smi
led. “I have a feeling this won’t be forever, Airy. Our lives are too intertwined now to imagine never seeing you again. Why don’t you go pack and then when it gets dark I’ll take you down to the garage and show you how to operate the car.”

  When the front door opened they all turned. “What’s up?” Fan asked, staring from one to the other.

  44

  I was dark by the time Fehin and Airy followed Carla down to the garage. Fan had gone to bed knowing they were leaving. All of them were crying by the time they closed the door to her bedroom.

  “Okay. Stow your stuff and then one of you get behind the wheel.”

  Fehin threw his pack into the backseat and climbed in. “This is a pretty nice car to just give away,” he said.

  “It’s a Range Rover but it’s nearly ten years old. I just don’t drive much and I have several years before Fan’s old enough. I signed the title over to Airy since she has a passport. It’s in the glove compartment with the insurance card. If you get stopped for any reason they’ll ask for them. I’ll keep paying the insurance. It isn’t much. Here’s the lever to set the seat where you want it and over here is the shift.”

  Fehin and Airy paid close attention as she went through the various pedals and levers and what they did. She explained everything on the dashboard.

  She had them practice backing and moving forward, braking and accelerating. And when it was over they were cross-eyed with exhaustion.

  “I know you’re tired but I think it best if you leave tonight. There will be less traffic on the road. One of you can sleep while the other one drives. I’ve put maps of the country in the glove box and there are also state maps. Airy, you have your cell phone?”

  “I do but once the bill comes they’ll cut it off,” Airy said.

  “I’ll pay it for you,” Carla said. I wouldn’t want you to be out there without a phone. I suggest you stop at a bank and withdraw all your money. If your grandparents call I’ll tell them you went camping.”

  “But…”

  “No buts, Airy. You’re like a daughter to me now.”

  When Carla reached to hug her, Airy burst into tears. “I can’t believe we’re leaving. I’ve been living with you for over a year now.”