Pieces of Lies

by Angela Richardson

  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I got out of the car and leaned in. “Josh, I’m not asking you to wait for me.”

  He looked at me sadly, “I know that Nor, I’m waiting for you because I want to. I’m waiting for you because I know you will come back to me. I know you want me too.”

  After saying that, he turned on the engine, waited for me to back off the car, and then sped away, leaving me staring off into the darkness.

  That night I tossed and turned in bed as Clint’s kiss and Josh’s declaration fought in my head. Going backwards and forwards, I finally concluded that I couldn’t ignore my feelings for Clint anymore. I had to know what was growing between us and why I felt so drawn to him in every kind of way. I told myself I shouldn’t fight it. There was some kind of chemistry between us and I decided, if given the opportunity, I was going to go for it with Clint wholeheartedly. No more tip-toeing around and going to and fro with my emotions. Josh was right; I needed to follow through with exploring my feelings for Clint if I was to going to know it was him I really wanted. I just had to wait and see if Clint wanted me too.

  Chapter 7

  Bring Me to Life

  I had some research to do at the library and had meetings with Pierra, a family friend and the gallery administrator, so the next couple of days were spent with me rushing around from one place to the next. I was surprised when, on coming home from the library later in the week, I found Clint at my apartment door.

  “I’m sorry to just come over. You don’t have a cell phone, don’t answer email and I tried calling your apartment and no one picked up. I need to see you.” Clint seemed apologetic.

  “I’ve been busy.” I opened the door but he stayed out in the hallway, waiting for me to say he could come in. “I’ve got to do some painting now anyway.”

  Clint leaned against the door. “Look, about the dinner Norah. I didn’t mean to come between you and Josh but,” He pounded on the door with a clenched fist. “Fuck it, I did mean to come between you and Josh.” I felt my skin come alive with goose bumps as I listened. “Norah, you are all I think about. You make me forget who I’m supposed to be, and let me be who I want to be.”

  I smiled at his confession and walked back to the doorway so I coud talk to his face. “I like you too Clint.” He breathed heavily hearing that and stepped forward into the apartment.

  “This is different for me. You are in my head so much that I can’t even think straight anymore. I need to get my focus back and I figure the only way that will happen is if you agree to be mine.” I eyed him, those words annoying me.

  Sensing my distaste, Clint changed his approach. “Not be mine, I mean, be my girlfriend, exclusively. We exclusively date each other. Just us. No one else. OK?”

  I tilted my head and stared at him. I allowed the silence to stretch on, torturing him without an answer.

  He deserved to wait.

  “Yes,” I finally announced and turned and walked down to my bedroom hallway, leaving Clint standing with his mouth open at the front door.

  Clint shook his head for a minute and finally followed behind me, shutting the door and yelling towards me. “Wait, did you say yes?”

  I paused in the hallway and turned back to him. “Yes Clint, I said yes. Do you want me to say it again, yes. Let’s try this. Us.” He looked baffled and happy at the same time.

  “Well, ummm, that’s great. I should go and let you get back to your painting then.” He seemed unsure what to do. I don’t think he expected me to be so agreeable.

  “No don’t leave. Stay. You can watch me paint if you like.” I started walking towards the paint room.

  “But Norah, you paint naked.” He continued to follow me.

  “Yes Clint, I know that.”

  His eyes expanded, feeling the full weight of what I just said. I was about to let him into part of my world. It was my way of declaring my real feelings for him because I was letting him watch me bare my soul. It was the most romantic thing I could say without saying it. I could hear his breathing quicken as he followed me and before we went into the room, he grabbed me, spun me around and kissed me passionately, allowing his lips to linger on mine as we finally embraced a new relationship.

  When he let go of me, I opened the paint room door and pointed to the table with my iPod. “You can go sit over there if you want. But I should warn you, if you are worried about your clothes, then it might be a good idea to go because there can sometimes be a significant amount of splatter.” He went over and sat on the floor next to the small table and drawers, not saying anything. Perhaps he thought I was going to change my mind. I took off my boots first and set them outside the paint room door.

  Clint then watched as I laid out my flat canvas and set out a series of paints ready for application. He looked me solely in the eyes. I saw him swallowing. His mouth pushed forward like his breathing had increased.

  I first took off my black tank top and stood in my black bra. Clint’s body shifted. With both my hands, I reached around and undid my bra and stood for a few minutes, looking at Clint, allowing him to get comfortable with my bare chest. He didn’t move but his eyes moved from my breasts and down my body and then back up again.

  I then tossed the bra over next to the table and began unbuttoning my jeans. I pulled them off swiftly, throwing them over to the corner of the room near my bra. I then removed my black, boy-cut panties and then stood holding them, letting my naked body be fully exposed to Clint. He clutched his knees in his seated position, his eyes moving along my body, examining my limbs. He looked back at my eyes nervously but I smiled at him so he could see how relaxed I was with him looking at me fully exposed. Strangely, I wasn’t nervous; I was turned on by his eyes that brushed up and down my body, over and over again. I threw my panties over to my jeans and top and then turned back to where I laid out the paints. “Can you press play on my iPod please?” I pointed to the table and Clint’s arm reached over and fumbled to find the play button. I smiled at his obvious nervousness. After a few moments I was surrounded by Show Me How To Live by Audioslave and began my painting process.

  I began to apply a series of magenta, violet, white and red paint to my arms, legs, knees, shoulders and breasts. I looked over to Clint, who was avidly watching my movements. Stretching and flexing in preparation, I was trying to decide how to begin, when my eyes locked with his. I felt an urge, a carnal urge inside me begging to satisfied. Drawing on that urge and listening to the hardness of the music that was booming, I began to use a series of movements as my body flexed on the canvas while thoughts of passion and desire flowed through me like blood. It almost felt like I was doing an erotic dance for Clint, even though I was covered in paints and moving like a crazy person on a flat canvas. It was liberating to be so open in front of him. I felt alive, free, and hungry for more.

  Suddenly Evanescence’s, Bring Me to Life started to play. I had finished my new piece and I was standing naked, covered in paint. Clint was still watching every single move I made, his eyes frozen on my body, and as if in time with the music, I walked towards him, determined, my heart pounding, feeling completely sexually charged. He stood up and backed away towards the wall, looking unsure as to why I was moving steadily towards him.

  Before he could open his mouth, I launched at myself at him, slamming him against the wall. He gasped at my ferocity but fought back with his arms and mouth, his lips gasping before finding mine, his hands locking on all parts of my body. The paint on me started to stain his face and neck as we twisted and turned, kissing up against the wall, the music belting us both from within, encouraging the passion that raged to push on.

  “I want you,” I mouthed to him. It’s all I could do as I knew he could not hear me over the screaming of the music. He understood completely and pulled his shirt over his head, tossing it across the room. I grabbed at his jeans, undoing his belt buckle, pushing them down. He pushed his feet free from the jeans, and I pulled off his boxers, seeing for the first time, his excited ma
nhood staring right in front of me. Impressive. I was so exhilarated with the moment and the music; I dropped to my knees and took him in my mouth, licking and sucking. I was a virgin, but I wasn’t completely inexperienced about how to please a man. His body tensed with the feeling, and I felt his hands run sensually through my paint stained hair as he groaned with the sensation of him in the back of my throat. I kept going, pulling him harder and harder into my mouth. He tensed more, but then stopped me suddenly, pulling me up off my knees and back to my feet.

  His lips met mine again, his tongue playing with my tongue, trying desperately to take more of each other in our hungry mouths. We broke free to catch our breath and his eyes studied mine to see if he had permission to keep going. I pulled his chest towards me again, mouthing the words, “Yes, yes, yes!” This was the going to be the moment. I had already waited too long for this. There was no one here to stop me now.

  I paused from our embrace, and walked over to the table with the drawers. I reached in to where I kept a secret stash of condoms. I had been ready and prepared for this since before I was engaged, but had been stopped over and over again.

  With the music still blaring, I handed a condom to Clint. He looked at it and hesitated, pushing it back towards me, but I pushed it into his hand, mouthing the words, “I’m ready.”

  The lust of the moment took a backseat as he carefully picked me up and laid me on my back on the mess sheets on the floor. I ran my hands over his chest, which was now slippery from the paint. He slid the condom on and before moving forward, he held my face in his hands, taking a moment to remember it with his eyes. It was sweet and my heart was genuinely touched by the softness he was showing me. Clint knew this was an important moment, but I pulled him towards me, not wanting to wait anymore.

  He slowly pushed himself into me, and even though he was well endowed, my excitement allowed him to glide inside with ease. He thrust a little more and paused, allowing me to adjust, and then thrust again. I felt a sharp twinge of pain as I was finally freed of my virginity. I let out a startled moan, and Clint froze. I pulled him into me again, reassuring him I was not hurt, and our need for our bodies returned in force.

  The music swirled around us as our bodies became one. Clint pushing into me smoothly and sensually with excited aggression, but not crossing the line of being rough. My body was all sensation as I felt pain being replaced with a new feeling building inside me. My hips pulsated as our eyes never left each other, and then somewhere between the panting and thrusts, I moaned loudly, my body reacting to the build up that erupted from within, taking me by complete surprise. Clint thrust again and then stilled, holding me as he found his release. I was dizzy and had to shut my eyes to find my equilibrium. Clint lay with his head on my shoulder, breathing hard. The music had stopped and there was now nothing but the silence and the sounds of our bodies trying to regain a slow rhythm to our heart beats again. “Shower?” I managed to get out between breaths.

  “Yes,” Clint panted, still with his eyes closed.

  I welcomed my shower with both arms. We both smelled of sweat and paint. As Clint gently helped to clean the paint off my body, he tried to speak, “That was… I mean, Norah you are so beautiful and watching your naked body paint was so… and combined with my feelings for you… I had no idea it could be that way… so intense, and that… was your first… are you… OK?” He couldn’t seem to piece together a coherent sentence.

  I turned around to face him, the water spilling over our faces. There was a dull pain between my legs that I found quite easy to ignore. I kissed him softly on the cheek and whispered into his ear, “I’m more than fine Clint, and I am so happy it was with you.”

  Chapter 8

  Choices

  Tess poked me in the ribs as I gave her a somewhat edited version of my deflowering. “That’s pretty over the top, don’t you think?”

  I couldn’t answer and blushed, feeling embarrassed.

  “I’m kidding Norah, that sounds fucking amazing!” I laughed a little, relaxing in her amusement. “Talk about a memorable first time. Certainly beats my first time up against an ice-cream truck.”

  My eyebrows shot up, “Ice-cream truck?”

  Tess touched her lips. “Oh yeah, one minute I was licking hot fudge off my sundae and the next I was licking it off the very hot van driver.”

  We continued to walk through the gardens and on the stone pathway heading towards the quad. “We haven’t left my apartment in a week. I just can’t get enough of him. Is that normal?”

  Tess giggled, “That sounds hot, and it also sounds like you two are crazy for each other.” It was true. We had completely become consumed with one another, spending every minute we possibly could together, eating in every night and passionately having sex. I was thrilled with my new relationship with Clint. My head was swimming with a new understanding of my body that was connecting with someone in a whole new way. I had a brand new appetite that I was voraciously exploring, and the more time I spent with Clint, the deeper my feelings grew for him.

  “I have to head over to the gallery and then I have to rush home and prepare dinner for Clint, so I’ll see you tomorrow,” I waved to Tess.

  “Don’t forget dessert alright,” and she gave me a quick wink goodbye.

  “Oh I won’t,” I grinned and headed towards the student parking lot where my car was parked. It was a breezy day and I had on a light coat that tied at the waist over my flared jeans. Holding it close to my body, trying to walk in the blustery wind, I was caught off-guard by movement towards the right of me behind a number of cars. A black trench coat bobbed up and then down. I felt an odd feeling like I was being watched, but had to remind myself I was at McLaren and not back home.

  Nearing my BMW, I noticed something reflective on the driver’s seat. When I reached my car, I saw it was a silver envelope. I unlocked my car and looked around. How did it get in there? I sat in my car, opened up the letter and read.

  Miss Norah Ross,

  On behalf of the president and board of senior alumni of the Lappell Secret Society,

  we would like to extend you an invitation to be inducted as a member into our very prestigious group.

  There are no initiation requirements in our offer, and thus all we will need is your verbal acceptance. Once this has been provided, we can begin your briefing with our rules and expectations and then induct you officially in sight of our members.

  For a sit-down appointment, please contact Arthur Wickburn on 555 427 810, extension 1. We are happy to further discuss your invitation and any reservations you might have.

  Please note that an immediate invitation, free from initiation, is only given to very select individuals who show tremendous potential in the manner of the Lappell.

  My mouth hung open for many minutes before all the questions began to swirl around in my head. Was this because of my relationship with Clint? Did he really have that much power and sway in the Lappell? Or had Josh put in some kind of recommendation? I was utterly confused by this offer and my plans to go to the gallery had now been completely deterred. Stuffing the letter into my black studded bag, I climbed out of my car and headed back towards the campus and over to the library.

  The campus library was an old colonial style building with hedging that wrapped all around it. The inside still included a lot of the old fittings but most sections had been renovated so it was fresh and modern. Hunting through the section on local groups and education, I found the book I was looking for, The History of McLaren University and Founding Societies.

  Flipping through the pages, I stopped at the chapter titled, The Lappell - Rumors and Truths. I sat down at a nearby table and continued to read,

  The Lappell Secret Society was founded in 1923 by Maxwell Errol Lappell. It was formed as a social club for some of the elite and wealthy members of the university but its actions and activities were quickly extinguished from public knowledge when the wealthy members began to pursue political and financial endeavors. Through t
he decades, its workings continued to be hidden from the public, allowing only its members to be indentified in connection with the club.

  The rules, conduct and activities associated with the Lappell, continue to be an ongoing mystery in society today. Rumor of its power, wealth and links to the president, FBI and National Security, continue to elude its membership. The members, although known, were rumored to have set up additional divisions within the Lappell where an undisclosed list of secret associates were formed and used for powerful pursuits.

  The largest chapter of the Lappell is rumored to be located in New York City.

  The only known truth about the Lappell is that there has been no actual recognition or submission about what they actually do and how they do it.

  I shook my head as I continued to read and wondered how Josh, or Clint for that matter, could be involved with such a group that were potentially involved in dangerous and criminal activity. It was hard for me to believe that any group with a secret agenda wouldn’t use underhanded means to achieve it. Could I be wrong? No, I felt certain I wasn’t, and I didn’t want any part of it.

  Reading through the chapter, a note caught my eye,

  Note: The inclusion of female members of the Lappell have been less than 2% since 1923 and those females who have been named, later went on to marry key leaders in the membership.

  Holy shit!! Was I being groomed for marriage? Was I being considered because I was with Clint? Was Josh involved in my offer? My head was completely conflicted by all aspects of the Lappell but I wasn’t about to become a member for the sake of Clint or Josh. I was not going to be part of a group who would later tell me who I can and can’t marry. I had been down that road. I figured I’d just tell Clint my answer is ‘no’ and that he would pass it on to Wickburn, and that would be the end of it. It was flattering that I had received the offer, but I wanted my own life, making my own decisions. The idea of being controlled for the rest of my life made me sick to my stomach.