“Things have changed Samuel, I like it here, I get…”
“Freedom, yes, that must be a new experience for you. I bet you’re not a virgin anymore as well.”
I felt a twinge of guilt. “It’s been six months. I never thought I would see you again, and I had no plans of ever returning to New York, and well, I’ve kind of,” and he felt even closer, “met someone.” I felt my arms come alive in goose bumps as his entire body brushed up behind me,
“Yes, I didn’t expect you to stay on the market very long considering how completely beautiful and intoxicating you are.”
I was uncomfortable because my natural instinct told me to turn and take Samuel in my arms, and kiss him because of all the wonderful memories I had, but I restrained myself from feelings I had suppressed months and months ago. My body still naturally eased back towards him though. “Samuel, don’t.” I felt a part of me remembering how happy we once were.
“You said yes to me, to us and our future. I haven’t forgotten that. We didn’t get married because you didn’t love me.”
My eyes were stinging with the thought. “I know why we didn’t get married,” and then he breathed into my ear,
“I’m going to get you back you know… soon.”
This wasn’t happening. No, not here, not now. I can’t deal with anymore drama.
“You have to go Samuel, Pierra is here.”
And I felt his fingers grip me delicately on my waist, “I’m so proud of your show, you are so very talented. Congratulations Len.” His breath was on the back of my neck, and then I felt the coolness of the air that signaled he was gone. His lips had touched my skin for the briefest of moments. I closed my eyes for a few minutes but it felt like an eternity. Was that all just a dream? Samuel, the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. The man who wanted to wait until we were married to have my body. I didn’t even get to say goodbye. I sunk into my body, transported back to that moment when we were separated. Please don’t let me break down right now.
“Who was that guy?’ Josh had taken his place beside me as I opened my eyes and restored myself from the surreal moment that had just resonated through me like thunder. Josh had clearly not recognized him.
“Oh, he’s very interested in this piece and wanted to know the story behind it.” My voice stuttered a bit from what had just happened, but I snapped back to right myself. I was in front on the purple, magenta, white and red piece, the very piece I had made moments before throwing myself, and my virginity, at Clint.
“It’s my favorite too; something about it feels… feels….”
And finding his words I blurted out, “sexual”.
Josh turned to me looking stunned. “I was going to say a little erotic, but yes, sexual.” He eyed me, waiting for more of an explanation.
“Yep, that sounds about right.”
I started to walk off when Josh tugged at my elbow, “Norah, where is Clint tonight?”
Oh yes, Clint, the inspiration for the piece we were just admiring.
“I don’t know Josh, not coming I assume.”
He was studying my cool reaction. “Why isn’t he coming? Aren’t you two together anymore?” There was a hint of elation in his questions.
“I don’t want to talk about it OK, not tonight.”
Josh saw I was visibly uncomfortable at being pressed for any further information, so he dropped the subject and then looked at his watch, “Damn it!” I looked at his arm where a new Rolex gleamed bright and new. A new perk from the Lappell?
“Late for something?”
He looked a bit conflicted about what he should do. “Go Josh, if the Lappell needs you, then go.” I actually wanted space from everyone in that moment. My head was swimming round and round with old feelings for Samuel and my confused feelings for Clint.
“This show was spectacular Norah, you are truly a diamond. Oh, and Arthur had to leave not long after we arrived but he said to say congratulations too.” Josh kissed my cheek and made a beeline for the door. I sighed as I watched him leave. What a night!
I tried to stay engaged in conversation with the various journalists and critics that Pierra introduced me to, hoping that in any moment, Clint would walk through the front door, but he didn’t. I thought that even if he didn’t want to be with me, he would at least show up as a friend. I thought we could at least still be that.
A clap of thunder caused the crowd to cower. Sensing an imminent storm about to break, the crowd began to disperse for the evening. I wasn’t too disappointed. It was getting very late and I was already surprised my work managed to keep people there as long as it did. Close to 11pm, the final guest had been ushered out the door, leaving just Pierra and I standing in the gallery surrounded by vacant space, empty couches and the mood lighting. The sound of rain began to belt down on the roof. “It’s really starting to come down now. You can take off Pierra, I’ll close up alright.”
Her eyes fluttered as she hesitated, “Are you sure?”
I motioned her to the door, “Of course, I just want to relax by myself for a few moments if that’s OK.”
She seem relieved. “We sold nearly every piece. You should be ecstatic, and I think we’ll get some good reviews and press as well, even using your fake name.”
I was happy. “Oh good, thanks Pierra, and good night.”
She grabbed her bag and headed towards the door but turned once more, “You know your father really wanted to come tonight, but he got, held up, you know how these things go.”
I frowned a little. “I certainly do. Thanks again.” She shuffled out, holding her bag above her head to shield her as she bolted for her car through the rain. I was secretly happy my father hadn’t come tonight, especially with the surprise of Samuel’s appearance. The coincidence was almost too perfect.
I sat on the large white leather sofa we had centred in the room for the show. The quietness was only broken by the rain, which sounded like it was getting louder by the minute. I stretched out, very tired from the evening and decided I wouldn’t be leaving until the rain eased up. I sighed heavily and shut my eyes for a few seconds.
‘Bang! bang! bang!’ My head shot up. I looked around for something to give me a sense of what time it was. Hanging above the door was an antique-looking clock that read 12.04. I had dozed off for an hour. It was still raining heavily and my eyes tried to make sense of the shadow I could see through the glass paneling of the front door. A shot of nervousness bolted me upright. Who would be here at such a late time? Had Samuel dared to come back? What will I say to him?
Walking closer to the door, I saw two crystal blue eyes staring back at me, water running down his face as the rain beat down. It was Clint.
I opened the door a fraction, “What are you doing out there Clint, and at this time of night?”
He was shaking. “I’ve been waiting hours in the car park for you to leave, but you never came out. Can I please come in?”
I closed the door a few inches, “No, you are not welcome here.”
He could see his week of shutting me out had consequences. “Norah…” and he stepped forward.
I held up my palm. “If you have something to say Clint, you can say it right where you are standing.” He took a step back, sensing my agitation.
“Look, I know I ran away from you, again, and I’m sorry, so sorry. This was never meant to happen. I never expected to,” he stumbled with what he needed to say. “This,” and he pointed to myself and then back to him, “was not supposed to make me feel this way. I feel irrational and impulsive and weak when I’m around you. I’m not sure if you are bringing out who I’m supposed to be or if I’ve always been this way and I’ve just been waiting for you to come along.” His eyes shone as he continued to lay out all his emotions. “I’ve spent all week trying to fight the uncontrollable urge I have to be with you. This world I’m in Norah, you are too good for it, and it’s best you didn’t accept that invitation from the Lappell. There are certain things we have to do, even
if we don’t want to do them, and I would never want to see you forced into anything because of some rule or command. No one should have to control you.” He walked right up to me and touched my face, the rain running off his fingers and down my chin. I didn’t move. I only listened.
“Your eyes burn so brightly with free spirit and passion.” He spoke with such conviction. “And I don’t care what happens anymore. I’ll regret every moment, of every day, for the rest of my life, if I don’t tell you how I really feel.”
I inhaled sharply, feeling the full intensity of his words.
“There are moments in your life that can change you forever, and you Norah, you are my forever moment. I’m everything I want to be when I’m with you. It feels natural, it feels right. I’ve been wandering lost in the dark until I met you.” He pulled my mouth within inches of his. “You are my light Norah and I am… I am... in love with you.” He strode forth and in a swift movement, he had his arms around me, his face reaching for mine.
Without a second thought, I embraced his kiss, my acceptance of his apology and his declaration of love. As our lips touched and moved together in slow gripping movements, I felt it too. The light that broke through the darkness in me. The calmness and serenity I desperately needed, combined with hot sensual forcefulness that I only craved from him. I couldn’t deny myself the pure intensity of need I had for his words and his touch.
I pushed the door open and he threw the rest of his body around me. He was soaked from the rain, but I was completely lost in the moment, our hearts finally coming together with the same understanding. He pulled away from the kiss and looked into my eyes, as if waiting for some kind of declaration from me also. I leaned up to his ear, “Make love to me Clint.” His eyes softened, allowing the words to move through him. It was enough. He lifted his eyes, saw the white leather couch, turned his attention back to me and scooped me up in arms. I became completely saturated by his soaked clothes, but I didn’t care.
As he sat me on the couch, his hands slid up my dress, his eyes not leaving mine. I had my arms resting on his neck as my back leant up against the couch. His hands flexed under my dress when he discovered I wasn’t wearing any panties. Seeing his surprised expression, I blushed. “I couldn’t wear any with this kind of dress,” and he let out a small moan between his teeth. His fingers found me and I arched my back, feeling them slowly pleasuring me, in and out, in and out. I was getting wetter and wetter.
My breathing quickened and as I threw my head back, Clint attacked my throat, his mouth kissing it intensely while I enjoyed the penetration from his hands. He slowly lifted his hands out and turned me so I was face down on his lap, so he could undo the zipper on my dress. As it came undone, he smoothed his hand over the bare flesh of my back, enjoying the softness of my skin. It felt wonderful to be touched so tenderly. He helped me back into a sitting position and my dress fell loosely off my shoulders and pooled around my waist. He lifted it above my head to reveal a white satin strapless bra, which he caressed with both his hands. He undid my bra with one hand and laid me down so my naked body was now fully exposed on the leather couch, except for the nude patent pumps I was still wearing. I leaned back onto the couch, which made my whole body seem longer, and Clint ran his fingers from my legs up to my mouth, where I nipped him gently with my teeth.
Seeing the playfulness in my eyes, he stripped off his saturated jeans and his white long-sleeved shirt, until his toned muscular body was naked above me, slowly lowering itself. I grabbed at his shoulders as he entered me, and we both paused, taking in the moment. He felt deep inside me and I moaned, relishing in the way all parts of my body craved his movements. The louder I moaned, the deeper he pushed, his hands gripping and massaging my breasts. “I never want to do this with anyone else but you Norah.” His voice was full of need and want. I closed my eyes as I got closer and closer. “Look at me,” he pleaded, and my eyes flew open. “I love it when you look at me,” and I continued to breath harshly as I neared climax. My hands gripped his neck as I pulled him into me hard, my moans becoming screams. He looked so turned on by my sounds I couldn’t bare it anymore. I tensed my whole body and released myself; the orgasm making me shut my eyes from the intensity of the sensation as I screamed loudly. I felt Clint thrust again, and still.
Bringing some reality back to the situation, Clint blurted out, “We didn’t use a condom!” I shook my head at him, and moved myself from under him into a seated position.
“You are concerned, now?”
He looked a bit tense, having been caught up in the moment without thinking practically.
“Clint, I’ve been on birth control for a quite a while, don’t worry.”
His eyes darted anxiously. “But at your apartment, all those times, with condoms?”
I looked into his eyes, “I trust you now.” He looked at me and kissed me sweetly and with his whole body said, “You can trust me Norah.”
Chapter 10
Old Flames
We caused more than a few eyebrows to be raised when Clint and I walked hand in hand into the quad on Monday. I guess people really weren’t used to seeing Clint on display with a girlfriend, but it didn’t seem to bother him that people were watching us curiously. I, on the other hand, felt like I was in a fishbowl. I had been so accustomed to avoiding public attention and keeping myself hidden from watchful eyes, and now felt like I was thrust head-on into everyone’s line of sight. On one hand, it drew attention to who I was, which was potentially dangerous for me, but on the other, it felt refreshing that I could revel in this small amount of freedom this exposure provided.
With our free hands, we both carried little satchels with our lunch as we wanted to make the most of the warm sun by having our own little picnic. We picked one of the bigger trees to sit under in the cool shade. Clint sat with his back up against the trunk, while I positioned myself in between his legs, my back leaning up against his chest. We enjoyed the closeness and comfort we felt as our bodies touched. There was always a need in the way our touch ignited us.
“What did you get?” Clint asked as I reached into my satchel.
“Umm, turkey, cranberry and Swiss on rye. You?”
Clint presented me his sandwich. “Beef and that really nice tomato chutney and brie.” As I ate my sandwich with one hand, my other hand seductively rubbed up and down his thigh. His body tensed under his slacks as we both ate. “I won’t be able to stand up for quite a while if you keep doing that you know, which means you’ll have to stay down here with me, in-between my legs.”
I chuckled a bit, “Oh, I’m aware of the repercussions of my actions.” I giggled some more and Clint pulled me back towards him, hugging me tightly as I laughed.
“Damn, you do crazy things to me.” Clint’s head was buried in my hair on the back of my neck.
I whispered back to him, “But you love it.”
He stopped nuzzling into my hair and lifted his mouth to my ear, “I love you, Norah.” I turned my head so I could find his lips and gave him a deep and hungry kiss.
Looking around at the curious eyes that constantly glanced over at us, I noticed a tall, dark individual walking from group to group that stopped walking when someone pointed to me and Clint. My back straightened immediately as I recognized the figure walking over to us. I dropped my sandwich and turned to look at Clint with an expression of fear all over my face. “What’s wrong?” Clint asked immediately and he put his hand on my shoulder to comfort my distressed look. Shit! Shit! Shit!
My whole body clenched as the voice spoke from behind me. “You didn’t think I’d leave without saying a proper goodbye did you?” I groaned and turned my head back around to stare up at Samuel who was gazing down at me with his stunning brown eyes. Those eyes could reach into my soul with a single look. He looked very handsome in black slacks and a maroon long-sleeved shirt. Clint and I both got to our feet.
“No, I didn’t, but I hoped you would say it in a more private setting.” Clint put his arm around my wais
t and his hold on me tightened. Samuel’s swept black hair framed his intense dark eyes and smooth olive skin. My breathing quickened.
Clint could sense I was affected by his presence, “Who is this guy Norah?”
I shifted my head so I could see Clint’s face. “Oh, he’s an old friend from New York; he came to my show last night. Clint, this is Samuel.”
Samuel smirked and didn’t hold out his hand to shake Clint’s. “I don’t know if ‘old friend’ is the right term for ex-fiancé, but alright then.”
FUCK! Way to drop that bomb!
Clint exhaled sharply and moved so he could stand straight, allowing Samuel to take in his full stature.
Why are men so primitive?
“So, this is the new guy.” Samuel eyed Clint, who didn’t take his eyes off Samuel for a second. It was weird seeing Clint look as if he wanted to beat him. He was usually so composed and now he looked like a jealous caveman.
“Yes, she’s mine.”
I rolled my eyes. “Clint, I’m not a piece of property, nobody owns me,” and then I turned to Samuel, “Yes, Clint is my boyfriend.” Samuel continued to grin, knowing he was getting under Clint’s skin. He knew I hated the possessive type.
“I didn’t see you at the show last night Clint, that’s kind of unsupportive for a ‘boyfriend’ don’t you think?”
Ummm.
Clint looked like he was fuming but remained restrained. “That’s none of your business Samuel,” I snapped back, defending Clint. Clint looked pleased, even though I spoke for him. I guess that gave him some kind of reassurance.
Samuel brushed his hand through his hair, a sign I knew as frustration, but then he returned to giving me his best smoldering look that silently made my insides rumble with fire. He saw my mouth curl, my breathing quicken and he grinned broadly, satisfied by my reaction. Damn, I didn’t want to be obvious, but I couldn’t help but still feel our connection. Did I just give him a sign that it was OK to pursue me? I hope not.
“It was great seeing you again, ah, Norah. Am sure we’ll catch up again soon.” Samuel leaned in to hug me goodbye but Clint stepped in front of him.
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