Dangerous Bonds

by Shani Greene-Dowdell

  He opened his eyes and moved beside me, bringing my eyes to his, and he smiled.

  "Good morning, Kemara. How long have you been up sweetheart?"

  I put a small smile on my lips. It was a little fake. I still had all these thoughts reigning my mind. "Just a little while. Just laying here thinking."

  "What are you thinking about?" he asked. He scooted up and held my eyes intently with his. A look of concern clouded over his expression as he waited for my response.

  I sighed. "Channing, come on, do you even have to ask what I'm thinking about? I mean we had a great night, don’t get me wrong." Oh, my God, it was so great. "But nothing will change the fact that you’re a part of a group that hates my very skin, for no reason at all but hate."

  I said I was going to try to put it behind me. However, I had always been proud of my heritage, mourned my ancestors and their plight in America, and knew about the strange fruit that swung from trees in the south…at the hands of the KKK. It wasn’t that easy to wake up the next morning and act like I didn’t land myself at a Neo-Nazi meeting, looking for my man.

  “Kemara! Baby, I swear I’m done with that group. I was done with it long before you walked into the lodge, but I didn’t want to deal with the fall out with my father. I hate that you had to find out that way. I wish I would’ve told you beforehand, and I will apologize for the rest of my days, if I have to, but please…don’t regret your decision to make love last night.” He kissed my shoulder and I worked on his words. “I love you…you have to believe me.”

  “I want to believe you,” I quietly stated.

  “Then, believe me,” he said. He reached up and touched my chin, bringing my eyes to look down at him. The love I felt for him was still there. I couldn’t deny that. I was still having to really think about what happened the previous night. I couldn’t afford to be so naïve again.

  “I don’t have any regrets,” I finally admitted. “I love you, Channing and Lord help me…I will always love you. I’m hurt that I was deceived, but in time I hope that I can get past that.”

  He pulled himself up and looked at me. “Truth is, we both were deceived. You don’t know how hard it is to be raised in a house where you’re taught to hate others, rather than to love them, when your feelings deep down inside are different. For a long time, my father told me it was just loving myself. But after seeing him deny people jobs at his trucking company because they were black, or deliberately pay them thousands of dollars less, I knew it was something deeply wrong with it. I know I can’t make up for all the wrong that my family and the people I associated with have done, but is there something I can do to help you get past my deceit? I just want us to be good,” he said to me.

  I thought about that and finally I nodded. “There is,” I said.

  He arched an eyebrow. “Alright!”

  “I want you to take me to your family.”

  He frowned. “Not on your life. Anything but that,” he said adamantly.

  I sat up straighter in the bed and stared at him. “Are you serious? You’re saying no to me, Channing?”

  He tilted his head and raised his thick, light-brown brows. “Hell yeah, I’m saying no. You saw my brother and father in action. I’m not going to put you through that again. It won’t prove anything but that they’re bigoted, and that much you already know.”

  “It’ll give me an opportunity to talk to them,” I said.

  I heard him sigh. He continued with a negative response. “Babe, I get what you want to do, and I say that it’s a crazy decision. My family isn’t the talking to kind, and I’m going to protect you always. I can’t do that if you want to see my father. They will eat you alive and spit out the pieces. He goes around town as if he’s an upstanding person, but he is anything but that. No, I won’t put you through it.”

  I looked away from him, confident that I wanted to do this, but not sure how I could change his mind. “Then, I’m not sure how you can help me get over this,” I mumbled.

  “Well, I have a compromise,” he said.

  I looked at him, intrigued by his words. “A compromise? What kind?” I asked.

  “I’ll call my mom and you can meet with her. She’s not as prejudiced as my father and brother are, and she’ll listen to you. If she sees in you what I see, she and only she can talk any sense into my father. She’s got a strong pull with the men of the family too.”

  I nodded slowly and confirmed that I would accept the compromise. It wouldn’t be quite the same. At least, it’d be a start. If she really had a pull with his father and brother, then maybe I could change their views. It was worth a shot. “I would love that, Channing.”

  He moved in and kissed me softly.

  I wrapped my arm around him and fell back, with him on top of me. It just felt right. I had no doubt that I could convince his mom I was good for her son and that would lead to her taking the reins and convincing his dad. I had to hope it would all work out.

  “She’s going to love you, Kemara. How could she not love someone as beautiful as you,” he whispered as he snuggled his nose into my neck, then gently kissed me on the side of my neck.

  I closed my eyes and started to relax. My juices were already flowing again and every fiber in my being was telling me that Channing was still the one for me. He moved his lips down to my shoulder and slowly nibbled. I moaned, tickling my fingers through his hair.

  His mouth wandered down to my navel and he kissed me tenderly, causing me to giggle with the touch of his breath on my stomach. “You are so beautiful,” he whispered, grabbing onto my hips and flicking his tongue out to trail around my navel. “What’s not to love?”

  “Ahhhh!” I sighed and bucked my hips up, already anxious for him to make love to me once more.

  He kissed me softly, waving feathery kisses along a sensitive path. My heat singed with desire as he slipped a finger inside of me, while he kissed me and looked up at me with such passion and love in his eyes. I smiled down at him and, when he moved another finger in, that time diving deeper into my sweet abyss, I let out a whimper and crashed back against the pillow. My mouth hung open as I anticipated his next move.

  His two fingers escaped me and my shot eyes open, staring at him, desperate for him. He held a devilish gleam in his stare. He licked the two fingers, while I watched him. As much as I wanted him to taste me again, I couldn’t control the agony that powered over me, to have his cock back inside of me, pounding into me with as much force as the bed would take.

  I wrapped my hand around his neck and forced him down to me, latching my lips onto his and tasting my sweetness against his lips. I slipped a tongue in between his lips, then wrapped my legs around him and he positioned himself between me. He slid into me as we kissed with fiery enthusiasm. I rocked my hips against his, taking him in fully as we became one again.

  Not letting up from the kiss, he plowed into me knocking the bed against the wall. Through groans, moans, and guttural pleas, we continued to remain in that position. His dick expanded inside of me and, if I wasn’t holding onto his kiss, my world would’ve gone dark. He kept me in the moment and everything seemed to come in full circle. We were back together, having sex with one another like it was the only thing keeping us alive, and it was. Channing made everything better. I didn’t have to worry about anything else.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Channing

  I still couldn’t believe that after seeing the fury and rage in my father and brother’s eyes, Kemara’s suggestion was to go to my parents’ house and meet with them. After what happened with the lodge, I thought she would want to stay as far away from my family, and possibly me, as possible. It just went to show how strong of a woman Kemara was. It made me love her all that much more, even though I questioned her choice of meeting my parents.

  I needed to talk to my mom in person and get her to agree to meet Kemara, so I could prove to her why I loved Kemara and how special she truly was to me. I had to make sure my father wasn’t home first. I called her, an
d she assured me he wouldn’t be around. I knocked on the house door that same morning.

  She opened the door and welcomed me in with a warm smile and a hot cup of coffee. “Thank you, Mom,” I said, as I grabbed the mug from her.

  She took a seat on the couch, and at first things were extremely uncomfortable. I felt awkward. She looked at me in a way that told me she already knew why I was there and I needn’t say a word. I didn’t know if that was a good thing or not.

  “Just talk to me,” she said, comforting me. I felt like a little boy again, needing to tell my mother something that I was struggling with. “You know you can talk to me about anything, Channing.”

  I smiled. “I’m sure you’ve heard what’s been going on,” I said.

  “Well, I didn’t hear your side of things, so I haven’t heard nearly enough,” she responded. It was a great response.

  I took a sip of my coffee and placed it down on the coaster, then sat back in the chair. “You know I didn’t go out looking for someone to love, especially someone that would be the last person Dad would want me to fall for.”

  She nodded slightly. “So…it’s love?”

  As she asked the question, there was a small smile dancing on the corners of her lips. She didn’t actually smile, but I knew my mother. It was there waiting in the wings for the right moment.

  “She gets me, Mom. She’s the best part of me, and yes…it’s love. And having her walk in and see where I come from, it killed me. I hate that she saw that and my heart broke for her. I knew then that this was real. The Neo-Nazi’s aren’t just a group of men loving their race. It’s an affront to the very woman I love. I was going to leave the group for her, but I didn’t get the chance to do that before it blew up.” I shook my head. “Dad wouldn’t understand that. Damon definitely doesn’t understand that, but Mom…they don’t know her.” She listened in silence as I spilled my heart out. “That’s why I’m here. I want you to meet her, and I want you to see the woman that I see in Kemara.” I swallowed the lump in my throat.

  After several minutes of silence in the living room, she spoke. “Your father and brother are both stubborn, and you and I know that. I have always known that you were the one with the kind heart, but son this is going to be a hard sell on your father and your crazy brother.”

  “Mom, I’m not trying to reach them. I’m done with them. It’s Kemara that wants to meet my family and I’d love it if you would at least talk to her once.”

  “Well Son, you can’t help who you fall in love with.” She finally let her loving smile show up in the room and brighten my day. “I would love to meet her.”

  I reached out and touched my mom’s hand. “Thank you, Mom,” I said.

  We finished the coffee, with me thrilled that after lunch I would bring Kemara to meet her. I had no doubt that my mother would see the woman I fell in love with, and she would help us out with trying to smooth things over with my father. I wasn’t optimistic about him dancing at our wedding, whenever I convinced her to marry me. I just wanted to make sure he didn’t go off the rails and do something evil, like harass Kemara.

  I left the house feeling better about her wanting to meet any part of my family. I immediately went back to her place. I didn’t call her. I wanted to keep it a surprise.

  When I got there and stood at her door, she definitely looked surprised.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked.

  “Sick of me already?” I asked, laughing.

  She snickered. “No, I was just asking.” She cupped my face in her palms and pulled me to her. We kissed in the door opening. When we parted, she tilted her head. “I didn’t expect to see you back here so soon.”

  “Well, you said that you want to meet my mother. There’s no time like the present.”

  Her jaw dropped. “Are you serious?”

  I nodded. “She wants to meet you and I think now would work.” I reached out and grabbed her hands. For the first time, I saw a bit of nerves on her face. I moved closer to her. “You’ve got this. She’ll love you, almost as much as I do.”

  She blushed and slowly nodded. “Okay, then let’s go,” she said. She grabbed her purse and we headed out of her apartment.

  The ride to my parents’ house was spent sitting close to one another, holding each other’s hand, and talking quietly about my earlier visit with her. When we got to the house, Kemara wasn’t as nervous as before.

  I got out of the truck and went around to the other side to open Kemara’s door. I gave her a reassuring kiss as we stood outside the truck. I took her hand and we went up to the front door.

  I rang the bell and within a few seconds, Mom opened the door. She smiled at me, then turned her attention to Kemara. “Welcome, Miss Kemara!”

  She held open the door and we entered the house. We went to the living room, and Mom sat down, then offered us both the couch. I held tightly to Kemara’s hand and she didn’t look the least bit nervous, like all her nerves washed away.

  “If you don’t mind, I would like to start off by saying something to you, Kemara,” my mother stated. “Is that how you pronounce your name, dear?” she asked.

  Kemara nodded. “Exactly.”

  I glanced at Kemara. She didn’t flinch that my mom wanted to speak to her first off. “Channing’s father told me what happened at the lodge, and I have to admit that, though I shouldn’t be, I’m surprised. I’m surprised that he wouldn’t hear Channing out and that they acted that way in front of you. And, I’m also surprised that you wanted to be here after it happened.”

  Kemara shot me a look and her eyes darkened.

  I opened my mouth to argue my mom’s point, but Mom held up her hand.

  “I also have known about love for a long time,” she continued. “It’s a living thing that no one has quite figured out. Love has caused me to overlook some bad things in Channing’s father, and even participate in some things. So, I get love. I talked to Channing earlier, and I get the feeling that what he feels is love. If you feel the same, then I do believe there’s nothing anyone can do or say to change your mind.”

  She looked at Kemara and smiled softly, then shifted her gaze to me. I smiled at my mom. “Thank you, Mom,” I said, mouthing the words. She then turned back to Kemara.

  “How do you feel about my son?” she asked.

  It had to have been rough for Kemara to speak that way in front of me and to my mother, but she didn’t seem phased by the question. “I do love your son, Mrs. Holloway. I have never felt this way about anyone ever before.”

  Mom smiled. “How does your family feel about my son?” Mom asked.

  “Mom!” I quickly stated. “Is that necessary?”

  “I don’t mind answering,” Kemara said. She turned to my mom and I tried to relax. “My family was skeptical, at first.” She smiled. “Well, my sister was pretty sure it wouldn’t work out, and my parents were unsure if we could make a go of it when I introduced them to Channing.” That was news to me, so I quietly sat back and listened to her. “However, when they got to know him and see us together, they immediately saw how much I care for him and that he cares for me, and their doubts slipped away. Even my sister was impressed by him. He played with her kids, just like it was the most natural thing. They loved him.”

  “I’ll be honest with you, Kemara. I mean nothing against you, because I didn’t even know you, but I had my concerns. Even when I saw how my son felt about you, I was worried that he was somehow blinded.” I tilted my head, ready to argue with my mom if she was going to give a bullshit answer that Kemara wasn’t good enough for me. I soon found out I didn’t need to argue with her. “You have proven me wrong. I have no doubt that you would make my son very happy. You love him and that’s all I need to know. Plus, you’ve got this spunk about you that I like,” she said and smiled.

  In that moment, I didn’t have any reason to feel uncomfortable in the house. Kemara’s natural beauty shined through as she talked to my mom like she was one of her best friends. Mom offered
us coffee and we took the conversation into the kitchen. It was an intimate setting that quickly went to when I was a little boy.

  “Did he ever tell you the time when he was sure that Martians were living in the attic?” Mom started laughing and I could feel my face redden.

  Kemara shot me an amused look, one that told me she wouldn’t let me live that one down. “No, he never told me about that,” Kemara said, chuckling as she took a drink of her coffee.

  “Mom!” I groaned. “Kemara doesn’t need to hear every small detail of my life. Besides…I was five. Give me a break.” The table erupted into laughter and Mom kept going on.

  “Well, when he said he needed to take the food up to the attic, so the Martians wouldn’t die, I nearly lost it,” Mom said, shaking her head.

  I covered my face and felt doomed. Kemara reached out and touched my hand.

  I pulled my hand back.

  She was grinning from ear to ear. “I bet you were a cute five year old.”

  I laughed. “I was darling.” That brought laughter into the kitchen again.

  Kemara turned back to my mom and the smile never left her face. “Well, Channing hasn’t told me much about his childhood, but I can tell that I should come to you for some great stories.”

  Mom winked at her. “Us women have to stick together.”

  Kemara smiled and turned to look at me and her whole face lit up. I watched her and the love I felt for her couldn’t have been any greater. I squeezed her hand and that’s when Mom sighed, causing me to turn to look at her. She nodded, giving me a knowing look, and for the first time I believed that everything would be alright. Even if things never went this well with my father and brother, I still had Mom on my side. It was a good idea to come and see her, and I sensed that I at least had one family member I could count on.

  Things were simple between Mom, Kemara, and I. A couple of hours passed and it seemed like minutes. I could continue to see the happiness in Kemara’s eyes, as we talked. After a while, we decided it was time to go before Dad got back from his Sunday evening fishing trip. The telling tale that Kemara was having a good time was when she looked disappointed that we had to get out of there.