by Paula Mowery
The clock seemed to tick slowly, though I attempted to will the Sunday School hour to be over. I didn’t want to go another round with Beatrice. I escaped, heading toward the ladies room to check for drool damage. I often found myself thankful the choir wore robes when a clothing mishap occurred during my nursery time. I eyed myself in the full-length mirror and breathed a sigh of relief.
I ran into Emily on the way to the choir room.
“Emily, Beatrice did it to me again. She expects me to know everything Griffey knows. Then she makes me feel like an idiot for not knowing.” I rolled my eyes.
Emily just grinned. “She doesn’t make you feel like an idiot. That interpretation is your own. She may be prone to rudeness and even being unkind, but you are the only one who can make yourself feel like an idiot. But, I know what you mean; she can be quite testing.”
“Testing? Annoying is more like it.”
“Addy.” She said my name as a reprimand and then looked me in the eyes.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t intend to sound so mean.” I whispered, instantly feeling guilty for my unkind words.
“Look, Beatrice can be Miss Eyewitness News, I’ll admit.” I smiled at the nickname we had given her, comparing her to a reporter that just had to know all and tell all. “But, she’s good at what she does.”
“You’re right.” I nodded, remembering how the kids flocked to her. She truly seemed a different person with them. “She’s devoted to her nursery and her babies. The kids adore her. I wish she’d mellow out in some other areas.”
“I guess we all have our rough edges, and they probably annoy someone.” She shrugged.
I wondered what rough edge I had that annoyed Emily, but felt too sensitive at the moment to ask. I would probably be offended at her quick response and stomp off. The thing that annoyed me most about Emily was that she was usually right.
Sometimes I didn’t want the right answer; I just wanted sympathy and support for my side. Truthfully, I was envious of Emily in many ways—even her wise and honest rebukes. At least she had the nerve to say something.
****
Monday morning’s alarm startled me awake. I jumped to my feet, anxious to see if I might run into Conrad again.
I zipped my jacket and started my walk. The morning was crisp as evidenced by the little white clouds created by my breath. Halfway through my walk, there was still no sign of Conrad. I scanned homes as I passed, even looked behind me—but there were just neighbors doing what they do. Arriving back at my front door, I was disappointed Conrad hadn’t joined me. I hoped he was all right. I didn’t even know how to find him if I wanted to check on him, but my main reason for wanting to see him was to see if he might have insight into the visions.
I went through my morning routine realizing that tomorrow would be a whole week since the two visions. I wasn’t sure if I felt relieved or ashamed. Did God want to use me, only I had pushed the opportunity away?
When I entered the dental office, I remembered it was the new assistant’s first day. It would be my job to acquaint her with the routine of our office. She was already waiting.
“Addy, this is Marilee,” Dr. Reeves said as I stowed my purse in my locker.
I faced the woman and extended my hand. “Nice to meet you, Marilee. I guess you’re stuck with me to show you the ropes.”
She grinned, looking rather nervous. As I studied her more closely, I wondered if Dr. Reeves misunderstood her age. The leather texture of her skin and abundance of wrinkles surrounding her eyes and mouth tended to portray a longer life than early thirties. Judging by the dark circles around her eyes, perhaps she was ill. The frequent raspy cough evidenced some malady as well. The skin on her arms thinly covered protruding bones. My mother would have said, “One good wind gust and she’d be gone!”
“Well, I suppose I’ll start by giving you a tour.” I kept my tone cheery, hoping to make her feel welcome and at ease.
“All right.”
Marilee was attentive and eager to learn and after a couple of hours working together, I felt Dr. Reeves had made a good decision hiring her. But, about ten-thirty Marilee became quite anxious; she even had a slight tremor in her hands.
“Are you all right?” I was back to my theory that she wasn’t well.
She wrung her hands. “Just need a little break.” She smiled, but it was obviously forced.
“Sure. We’ve worked hard this morning. Go ahead.” I nodded toward the lounge. She might be diabetic. I had a friend in college who was. She had to make sure she ate at short intervals throughout the day to avoid insulin fluctuations.
I cleaned the exam room and wandered toward the small employee lounge area to check on Marilee. It was empty. I hastened to the employee restrooms but found them vacant as well. Just then the back door opened. Marilee sashayed in with a calm expression on her face. My nose burned from a sudden flood of cigarette smoke. Her requirement wasn’t sugar, but nicotine.
“Nasty habit, I know,” she said rather repentant.
She tossed the pack and lighter into her small locker. “What’s next?” She seemed revived.
The day continued in the same manner—we would work about two hours, and then she would have to run outside to smoke. Cigarettes controlled her life—her very schedule. Her intermittent coughing spells alarmed me. There were times I feared she wouldn’t be able to catch her breath.
At lunchtime Marilee sat alone in the break room picking over the last bits of a microwave meal. I took a seat beside her, hoping to find out a little more about her.
“So, are you new in town?”
“Sorta. I moved away when I married years ago. When my husband left last year, I went back to finish my dental assistant training. I decided that home was as good a place as any to start again.”
“Do you have a church?”
She diverted her gaze, concentrating on her plate. “Haven’t been in years. Probably should go. My health is not so good. Maybe I could get some prayers.” Her voice held a hint of sarcasm.
“Well, you’re welcome to come to the church my husband pastors.”
Marilee’s expression changed to embarrassment. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know…” She patted her chest.
“Relax Marilee. It’s all right.” I waved my hand dismissively. “But, we would love for you to visit some Sunday when you feel ready and settled.”
“The last church I attended wasn’t very fond of my smoking in between services outside. I just felt I needed to be there when I found out about my COPD and lung cancer risk.”
When she spoke the last line, she wouldn’t look in my eyes. Her face flushed, and she stared at her soda can.
I patted her hand. “Wow, look at the time, we had better get back to work or Dr. Reeves might come searching for us.”
A look of relief flooded her face. I supposed she expected me to scold her. How sad that other Christians would judge her so harshly and ignore her spiritual need just because of a bad habit.
Later, as we were all leaving for the day, I stopped Marilee.
“I don’t work on Tuesdays, Marilee. Are you working tomorrow?”
“Yes, but you’ve prepared me well. I think I’ll make it.” She bit her bottom lip.
“I think you’ll make it too!” I gave her a quick pat on the back.
“When do you work again?” Her brows rose.
“I work Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday.”
“I’ll see you on Thursday then.” Marilee gave a smile.
“If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask. Everyone’s pretty friendly around here.”
“Thanks, Addy.”
****
Sitting at Emily’s kitchen counter for our weekly Chinese lunch the next day, I told her all about Marilee.
“Sounds like she needs a friend,” Emily said.
“Yeah.” I shook my finger with emphasis. “But, if I ever do something that appears to be killing me, please step in. It is disturbing to hear her cough and see how her health su
ffers.”
“Don’t worry. You know me. I would do more than step in—maybe shake you.” She glared at me for a moment, and then we laughed.
Emily’s expression turned serious. She propped her elbows and leaned toward me. “So what about the visions?”
“I haven’t had any more. It’s been a whole week. I’m relieved on the one hand, but I feel guilty on the other.”
“Guilty?”
“Yes. Did I miss out on God wanting to use me? I wasn’t very willing.” Suddenly my sweet and sour chicken seemed just sour.
“Addy, you need to decide—do you want to forget about the visions or do you want to be willing to be used, however God chooses?” She gestured as if she held the two choices in her hands.
Emily placed her hand on mine and patted like I had done to Marilee yesterday. She smiled that reassuring smile I’d grown to love over the years. Emily is one of my biggest blessings, and sometimes that means being honest with me even if it is painful.
****
Wednesday evening during prayer meeting, Griffey shared as delicately as possible about the death of Gladys Stanley, another senior saint in our church. He didn’t need to explain who she was, for everyone knew her and had been touched by her.
“The family will receive friends on Friday evening at McCarty’s from six until eight with the funeral following. The graveside will be Saturday morning. Naturally, it was her wish in lieu of flowers to make donations to our church.” Griffey’s voice quivered slightly, but he stood tall. A congregation had no idea the depth of feeling stirred in those who ministered to them. Deaths like Miss Gladys’s resembled that of a close family member, even though there is no blood relation.
And on Friday evening when I sat in a padded folding chair in the back of the funeral home chapel, with no more seats available, and people clumped in the back lining the side walls, I marveled at the testimonial to this woman’s life.
Even though Griffey’s occupation required my presence at many funerals, I always hated them. I believed it morbid to walk by a casket and look at a corpse. I didn’t want to see my mother that way, but had no choice. When my mother’s cancer fight ended, I was only eighteen. I had no experience with choosing a casket and making funeral arrangements, but there was no one else to do it. Even though I detested funerals, I just couldn’t bear to think of anyone else having to go it alone as I had.
A hush fell over the crowd as Griffey stood to begin the service.
“We have come today to honor and celebrate the home-going of Gladys Stanley.” His voice was clear, but his eyes exuded sadness. “As is evidenced by this crowd, she touched many lives.” A hint of a smile curved his lips. “I first met Gladys when I became pastor at New Glen Baptist Church where, I might add, she was a charter member. At the beginning of every service you would find her at the sanctuary doors greeting all who entered. As a ‘wet behind the ears’ pastor, I asked if I might stand with her. She was most gracious and enthusiastic in her affirmative reply. Many of you may not be aware that when she wasn’t working in the church, she was at our local food bank or our association’s pregnancy crisis center. She was a blessing to so many people. I know on Wednesday morning when she closed her eyes to this world, she opened them in heaven and heard: ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant …’”
Tears welled up so deep my vision blurred. Silently I poured my heart out to God. “Oh God, this dear lady worked for you until she physically could not go on. I want to hear: ‘Well done’ when I see You face to face. I don’t care what it takes, use me.”
The tears spilled down my cheeks. I experienced a release like the peace of resting in a safe place.
5
Sunday evening’s crowd was slightly larger. Kevin was speaking tonight. I suppose people were curious what such a young man would share. Emily and I sat together on the second row with her husband. When Griffey introduced Kevin, she grabbed my hand and held tight. I cannot imagine the nervousness Emily must have felt. Mine was enough to make my pulse quicken and a whole swarm of butterflies flutter in my stomach.
As soon as Kevin stood, I noticed he wore a dark suit and red tie, exactly like in my vision.
“I stand here today surrendering to the ministry. I know that God wants me to become a pastor. I want to publicly thank my mother for sacrificing a career to make sure I had a Christian education and foundation. Just as the verse in the Bible says, ‘her children will rise up and call her blessed.’ I have been immensely blessed!”
Emily’s head jerked my way. She looked me in the eyes, tears streaking her face, and mouthed, “Thank you.”
The scene played out exactly as in my vision. Kevin not only said verbatim what I had heard, but he wore the very outfit I’d seen. This proved to me it wasn’t a mere daydream. God had allowed me to see a future happening—a blessing to be gained through obedience.
****
Monday morning came again too soon, and Dr. Reeves entered as I prepared the exam room for its first patient.
“Morning Addy. I noticed Elianna’s name on the prayer list Wednesday night. Something about a mission trip?”
“Yeah, she’s going to West Africa over Thanksgiving. I’m a little nervous about the distance, but she is so excited.”
“Twila always wanted to go on an international mission trip. She was sure we could bring dental health to someone in need of it.”
His face still showed sorrow when speaking of his deceased wife. His grief looked fresh even though she died ten years ago.
There was a soft spot in my heart for Dr. Reeves. He recognized my struggle as a young woman trying to support myself and my mother. He offered to pay my way through dental assistant school. I jumped at the offer. He hired me right after graduation, and I’d worked with him ever since. He gave me the guidance and encouragement of a father, which I lacked.
I heard the squeak of his stool as he sat down to review the next patient’s file. In an instant, I saw Dr. Reeves standing beside a sign with the words Twila Reeves Dental Clinic. His face displayed a satisfaction as well as a smile. In the background stood a modest building surrounded by a large group of people of Asian descent.
“Today we dedicate this clinic in memory of my wife, Twila Reeves. She would have been so pleased. I thank God for this opportunity. I hope this clinic will bless many as I have already been blessed through my work here.”
Another man standing nearby spoke in a language I didn’t understand. Obviously he was interpreting Dr. Reeves’s words. When he finished speaking, the crowd erupted with cheers and clapping.
“Addy, Addy!”
Dr. Reeves came back into focus. His eyes stared intently at me. His brow wrinkled in puzzlement as he called my name.
I shook my head. “Sorry. I was just thinking.”
“You seemed like you were in another world.”
“Sorta.”
I crossed the white tiled floor of the exam room, standing near Dr. Reeves. “Have you ever considered fulfilling Twila’s dream?”
He diverted his gaze back to the file in his hand. “Oh, I’ve considered it, but I’m too old.” He stood and walked to the nearby counter, rearranging his instruments.
“Aw, come on, you’re never too old.” I joined him by the counter to get his attention.
He pivoted, making eye contact. “She talked about building a dental clinic in Thailand.” He chuckled and shook his head. “My Twila was a dreamer.”
“I remember.” I laid my hand on his arm. “You could still do it for her—in her memory.”
He smiled and patted my hand. “I think my time has passed.” He moved back to his stool, plopping down.
Suddenly, I needed a moment to myself. “Excuse me.” I cleared my throat. “I need to go to the supply closet.”
I practically ran to the closet, entered, and closed the door behind me. I took a deep breath. It happened again! A vision. Because of my plea to God at Miss Gladys’s funeral, excitement welled up inside. Sure, a small part of
me was freaking out, but this seemed like a second chance. A knock on the door startled me.
“Addy?”
It was Marilee’s voice.
“Yeah, coming.” I took a deep breath and let it out.
Marilee looked puzzled when I emerged from the supply closet empty-handed. I just smiled and went about my tasks.
****
The next day, I spotted Emily sitting on her porch steps as I pulled into her driveway. When she saw me, she stood. By the time I opened my car door, she was standing at the driveway edge. As I emerged, she embraced me and squeezed tight.
My eyes widened. “What was that for?”
“Thank you.” She smiled.
“For what?”
“You encouraged me not to be swayed by other’s opinions—just God’s. And, exactly what you saw in your vision happened Sunday night.” Her words tumbled out loaded with excitement, or maybe surprise.
“I know, and I had another one yesterday.” I gnawed my thumbnail.
“Really?” Emily’s eyes bulged. “Come on.”
She tugged at my arm, leading the way into her house and straight to the kitchen. As we prepared our Chinese lunch, she eyed me expectantly.
“Well? Who was this vision about?”
“Dr. Reeves. First he mentioned Elianna’s mission trip and then he told me about his wife’s dream to bring dental health to some foreign country. That’s when I had the vision.”
“So, what was it?”
“I saw Dr. Reeves dedicating a dental clinic bearing his wife’s name. I believe it was in Thailand. But, he says he’s too old. I tried to encourage him. He feels his time has passed.”
“But if he doesn’t obey, the vision can’t be realized, right?” Emily stopped with a shrimp halfway to her mouth.