Just what the doctor ordered, Renee thought ruefully.
She wisely decided against turning on the television. Quiet seemed appropriate this morning. What should she do until the kids got up? She considered making them a big breakfast but scratched the idea, knowing it would take the edge off their lunch plans. They could scrounge up cereal for themselves.
Instead, Renee fired up her laptop and checked out a few more ideas, rounding out her “Adventure” list, as she dubbed it. This gave her plenty to talk about with the kids at lunch, so she could switch gears until then.
During sleepless hours the night before, her mind had ping-ponged between different areas of her life where she now realized she wanted to make some improvements. Yesterday morning she felt relatively content with her life—even if she knew she was often going through the motions. She no longer felt that satisfaction, small though it was. Yesterday’s wake-up call made her realize it had been ages since she’d challenged herself with anything tougher than getting through a busy day.
And so, this quiet morning was the perfect time to continue the soul searching she’d begun at the coffee shop the day before.
Yesterday, she’d filled a dozen pages with her jumbled feelings and lists. Starting a fresh page, Renee headed it up with “Things I am Thankful for in My Life Today.” Another revelation from last night’s tossing and turning was that she’d decided she was done focusing on just “getting by,” and on all the negative feelings brought about by her layoff. She refused to let this turn her bitter.
Like many, she was familiar with the concept of the “Law of Attraction.” She’d read The Secret, a popular book on the subject, a few years earlier. She’d even listened to the audiobook in her car during daily commutes. At the time, she thought there was merit to the ideas, but she didn’t do anything with the information. Now was a good time to dust off her copy and place it beside her bed. Re-reading a few pages before turning off the light might put her mind on a more productive path and help prevent the insomnia she suffered last night. Or it could have the opposite effect, and make her mind race even faster. Regardless, it would be worth a try.
She often heard about the importance of feeling and expressing gratitude. Unless she was grateful for what she already had, would she be open to receive more to be grateful for in the future? The experts said no, and not having anything more reliable than their teachings, she decided to trust them and make an effort to show more gratitude.
She started writing again. First came the usual—her kids, her parents, her home, a vehicle that seldom broke down, her friends. But she wanted to dig deeper, beyond the obvious: she truly was grateful to have a financial buffer with her severance package; she didn’t have an updated resume yet, but was thankful she would be able to display the loyalty she had showed her company when she did pull one together; most people jumped jobs every few years, but she worked hard, climbed the proverbial “corporate ladder” within the same company, and earned higher levels of responsibility.
Despite being scared to death now, she might have ridden it out at her old company until retirement, if not for the layoff. She might never have tried anything new. Had she done anything in recent years to benefit anyone other than the company’s shareholders?
Looking at it now, it all seemed so . . . shallow.
The multitasker in Renee got up and filled her cup with fresh coffee. She felt like she should be cleaning house or doing laundry instead of sitting at the table, writing. Taking the time to think about her life felt foreign and unproductive. So, she would compromise. It wasn’t even 8:00 a.m. yet! She would stick with this for one more hour and then start in on domestic chores.
Slowly, Renee realized feeling gratitude did give her spirit a boost. She committed to start each day with a fresh list of things she was thankful for and to limit her exposure to the news as much as possible. If something truly significant happened in the world, she would hear about it. Her daily newspaper subscription was due, but by God, she wouldn’t renew. She would also fight the habit of turning morning and evening news shows on. She would limit her Internet surfing, too. The sensationalistic spin placed on so much of the news was too depressing.
She needed to lay out some goals. The categories were probably going to be pretty obvious. One would be “Career Goals,” given she was sitting at her kitchen table this morning instead of an office. She also recognized she took her health for granted and didn’t actively do much to keep herself healthy, so “Health and Fitness” was going to have to make the list. What else should she work on?
Maybe, since the only other individuals in the house were less than half her age—and her offspring—“Relationship Goals” needed to be on the list. She didn’t want her goal to be “to get a man,” of course. At times she thought it would be nice to share her life with a guy, and she wouldn’t rule it out, but why hadn’t she felt compelled to call any of her friends yet about what she was going through? Probably because most of them were actually co-workers or people she met through work. If they didn’t have work as common ground, what basis for friendship was left? Relationship goals were going to need to encompass relationships with men, friends, and family. That reminds me, she sighed, I haven’t called Mom back yet.
She sat back and chewed on the end of her pen. She needed to face it—she was boring. Where was the spontaneity? Where was the excitement? The fun?
That was it. Another area of focus would be “Fun.”
Nothing else came to her and she was starting to feel anxious again. She left it at that for the day, set her journal aside, and rinsed out her cup.
She took the next half hour to review her severance package. As she’d hoped, based on her years of service, she would receive full pay and benefits for thirteen months.
The clock would start running next Monday. She needed to figure out her next steps.
But first, laundry.
Chapter 7
Gift of Adventure
Julie voted for her favorite pasta restaurant for lunch, and they all agreed. Once they finished eating and the mess was cleared away, they each pulled out their list. Renee was delighted to see both kids had made an effort.
“OK, how should we do this?” Renee asked. She wanted to let them take the lead.
“Maybe we can divide our time between now and when school starts again into three parts,” Julie suggested. “We could say Leg One of our time is between now and the day before Christmas Eve. Leg Two could be from Christmas Eve to the day before New Year’s Eve. The last part, Leg Three, could be New Year’s Eve until January eighth, when classes start again for Robbie.”
“Not bad,” Robbie conceded. “I kind of like that—we need to use at least one idea from each of us. Plus, each of those parts has a different feel. Leg One feels like prep time, Leg Two feels like family time, and Leg Three feels like party time!”
“That works,” Renee said, laughing.
So the sharing began. Some ideas were quickly laughed off. Some caused Renee to catch her breath in surprise. The kids loved her suggestion to catch a flight to a beach somewhere. They hadn’t dared be that extravagant themselves.
Their adventure started to take shape.
An idea from each of them made the cut for Holiday Prep. Most of it could be done close to home. Originally, without taking the time to plan their days leading up to Christmas, each of them would probably have gone their separate ways with friends or working, taking a little time to buy each other gifts, but otherwise focusing on themselves.
Family Time would involve some travel, not only in miles but also back in time. One of the accepted ideas caused Renee lots of heartburn—but in the spirit of making this a true adventure, she agreed.
Party Time felt the craziest to Renee. It would eat into her savings and would require some scrambling on the front end to pull off, but it would likely result in memories they could all hold dear for years to come.
During a three-way phone conversation with Julie over Thanksgivi
ng, when they couldn’t be together, they’d promised to spend a few days together at home over the holidays. Circumstances were converging now that promised a much more exciting time together. Little did any of them appreciate how much this time would change all of them.
Chapter 8
Gift of Preparation
Spontaneous adventure sounds wonderful, but reality requires work on the front end.
Renee needed to make arrangements so their second two legs could happen. She didn’t waste any time. As soon as she got home from lunch, she got out her legal pad and her laptop to plan her attack. Her goal was to have preliminary arrangements made by the end of the day.
Together they decided to make the extra effort to spend Christmas with extended family, as long as their family didn’t already have other plans. Her first call was to her parents. It had been five years since she took enough time off at Christmas to drive to her parents’ home. The first few years were hard and Renee dealt with the guilt—either real or imagined—of disappointing her parents by not going. Would there even be room for them now?
Her mother answered the phone when she called. “Hey honey, did you get my message yesterday? Did Julie make it home?”
“Hi Mom, sorry I didn’t get a chance to call you back until now. Things were crazy with Julie coming home, and yes, she made it back fine. Say, Mom, I have a favor to ask . . . the kids and I were wondering if it would be all right for us to come home for Christmas this year? We weren’t sure what your plans were, or even if you were going to be around, but we have a little more time off and thought it would be fun to come back and see everyone.”
Renee always felt welcome, but she recognized time moves on. Her absence in recent years left her in the dark as to what holiday celebrations looked like for her parents these days.
After a beat of silence, her mother’s voice came over the line again.
“Really? You’re considering coming home this year? To be honest, we haven’t made many plans yet. You know you are always welcome. We would love to have you! When will you get in?”
The planning continued from there. Renee avoided going into any detail when her mom asked why they would have more time this year, promising to explain later. Her mom didn’t push, thankfully. With a sigh of relief, Renee checked off the first item on her list. It would be so much fun to get together with everyone.
The next item made her hands sweat and heart thump. This was the sticky point. Julie wanted to visit their other grandparents over Christmas. It had been ten years since Renee stepped foot in her in-laws’ home, and almost as many years since she last talked to them. But at Julie’s suggestion, Robbie’s eyes lit up and Renee didn’t have the heart to deny them. She agreed to at least find out if they would be home. She dug out her old address book—she had no idea if the phone number for Jim’s parents would still work; she wasn’t even entirely sure they were still alive, although she thought someone would have gotten word to her in the event of their deaths.
Hands shaking, she dialed the number. She wasn’t sure if she hoped they would answer or hoped they wouldn’t.
On the third ring, someone picked up.
“Hello?” said a familiar voice.
“Hello,” Renee replied, trying to sound braver than she felt. “Marilyn, this is Renee . . . I know, it’s been a long time. I’m glad this is still your number . . . I’m sorry we’ve let so much time pass and not kept in touch. I have no idea what your plans might be, but the kids and I are going to be home over Christmas and they asked me to call you to see if we could stop by?” She was relieved when her voice didn’t quiver nearly as much as her stomach.
Similar to the discussion with her mom, her request was met with silence, but the pause was longer this time. She only knew her mother-in-law was still on the line because she could hear shallow breathing. Renee jumped in to fill the uncomfortable silence. “Listen, I know it has been a long time and you might not want to see us. If you’re busy, I completely understand. I could even tell the kids I wasn’t able to reach you if you would feel more comfortable with that, instead of me telling them you don’t want to see us.”
“No, wait, I didn’t say that,” Marilyn finally replied. “It’s a shock to hear from you, that’s all. I wasn’t even sure who you were at first. I need time to think about this. Can I get back to you? Why don’t you give me your number and I will be in touch?”
Since Renee wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to see her in-laws, she was fine with this response. She gave Marilyn her cell number, again apologized for contacting her from out of the blue, and hung up. It was a huge relief to cross that item off her list.
Renee gladly moved on to the third item: planning their tropical vacation. She loved the idea of ushering in the New Year and new possibilities with a frozen cocktail in her hand and sand between her toes.
They should be able to get a direct flight out of Minneapolis to somewhere tropical without the hassle of connecting flights. Renee normally would have booked a big vacation like this months ago. Now she didn’t have that luxury, but maybe she would find some last-minute deals. The kids agreed to keep an open mind, and Renee would surprise them with their final destination on Christmas Eve.
She jumped online and started with standard travel sites. She was thankful her dad insisted on taking the kids to Canada fishing a couple years ago so their passports were current. Thanks to an overseas work trip, Renee’s was current too.
She didn’t know where to start. She had never been any place considered “tropical.”
She started by poking around online, selecting “Top 10 Tropical Destinations” from the search results. Her screen filled with beautiful pictures of turquoise water and white sand beaches. All were wonderful, scenic pictures with no people. The list read like a fantasy honeymoon extravaganza. Names like Bora-Bora, Fiji, and Hawaii jumped out at her. Wasn’t the bottled water she treated herself to once in a while from Fiji? Her interest was piqued.
She set a budget for the trip. It was significantly higher than she would normally spend on Christmas, but this wasn’t a normal season. Careful review revealed they wouldn’t get a five-star hotel at that price point—probably nothing more than a three-star—but some were offering specials to help the resorts fill up for New Year’s. She jotted down contact information for a few resorts that looked promising. There was no way Renee was going to drop that kind of cash without talking to a live person before booking something.
She called the first resort on her short list of three. It was the most expensive, barely within her budget. Renee was disappointed when he told her, in a thick accent, they were full for that week. She heard the same from the next resort. She might have to pick a different destination. The last resort on her list was a bargain compared to the first two, but would still challenge her budget. The cheaper rate made her hesitant to call, not sure what they would get if she picked it. But she was tired of working on the logistics, so she would make this one last call and then take a break until tomorrow.
After six rings, a woman’s voice came over the line. “Hello, thank ya for calling Sailor’s Cove. My name is Lulu, how can I be of assistance?” The woman sounded like she was from Boston instead of an island in the South Pacific.
“Yes, hello, my name is Renee Clements and I am calling to see if you have any vacancies for the week of New Year’s? It would be for myself and my two children.” Renee doodled on her notepad as she waited while the woman checked.
“Well, honey, today is your lucky day. We had a cancellation earlier today so we have one two-bedroom cabin open,” Lulu confirmed. “We would love to host you and your kids for a week in paradise. Why don’t you take a little time to decide—I can hold the cabin for you for four hours.”
Renee thanked Lulu and spent the next three hours surfing the web, finding out everything she could about the area of Fiji where the resort was located. She studied the resort’s website and read through all the reviews. Something about it just felt . . . right.
Taking a leap of faith, she called Lulu back with her credit card number and booked the week of December 29.
Their holiday adventure was starting to take shape.
Chapter 9
Gift of Joy
Renee kept thinking about the Salvation Army lady she had encountered outside the coffee shop earlier in the week, hours after receiving the news about her job. Something about the older woman calmed her. Maybe it was the knowing look and warm smile she offered on that cold, unfortunate afternoon. Renee admired the senior for braving the elements and giving her time to help others, so she suggested to the kids they should all give back in some way before leaving for Christmas. Despite what had transpired, Renee knew they were so much better situated than many. She always gave to the United Way through payroll deduction, and used to help at an occasional emergency drive. When Renee suggested they use the first few days of their break to volunteer, both Julie and Robbie agreed.
Julie had made a new friend named Anna at college. Anna lived on her own and struggled to pull together enough money for tuition, books, and food after paying for her apartment. She would sometimes go hungry when grocery money ran low. This was a first for Julie, something she’d never encountered in her own life, and she worried about her new friend. So she decided she wanted to pull together a care package for Anna. She would have to be a “Secret Santa” because her friend would never knowingly accept anything more than a token gift. Julie started brainstorming on what she wanted to include in the package. Robbie thought it would be fun to be the elf to deliver the goods, since Anna wouldn’t know him. Renee offered to get in on the fun, too, by baking some Christmas goodies to include.
There was a large-ish bowl of loose change in the laundry room. With Renee’s permission, Julie took it to the bank and was shocked to come out of there with $261 in cash. She used the money to buy Anna food, toiletries, new pajamas, socks, a warm new hoodie, and a pair of jeans. Julie guessed they were the same size but purchased the clothes at a chain store so Anna could exchange them if necessary.
Whispering Pines (Celia's Gifts Book 1) Page 4