Now or Never

by A. J. Bennett

  She leaned down and smelled the yellow roses, a smile tugging at her lips. They were her mother’s favorite. Their father used to bring her home yellow roses when he went away for work. A promise of a new beginning, he would say. Grayson’s smile disappeared at that thought, and she rolled her eyes, readjusting her bag.

  We see where that got Mom—alone.

  Grayson found the small silver key beneath the empty flower pot on the porch—not safe, but she had to get in somehow. She fumbled with the unfamiliar lock, and then pushed the door open. As soon as she entered the open foyer, she disarmed the security system using the same code as always. She shook her head at her mother’s predictability. Ethan would not approve.

  Her bags dropped with a thud onto the hardwood floors. She rubbed her face, feeling the exhaustion from the long drive. The faint smell of leftover sandalwood incense filled the air, and the trickle of the fish tank soothed her frayed nerves. Grayson rolled her shoulders and dropped her head, feeling the tension ease out of her.

  The living room was dark, and the kitchen was bathed in moonlight, giving it an eerie glow. She brushed a hand over the wall just inside the door, searching for the switch, and then flicked on the light. Colorful throw rugs were scattered about shiny hardwood floors, and the walls were hung with houseplants and her mother’s collection of eclectic, tribal masks from Africa. A large, comfy-looking green couch dominated the living room, and next to it, toys were piled in a box.

  Grayson looked at the clock—it was past nine. She’d assumed Luna would be here, but a quick check of all the bedrooms showed no bags or belongings to prove Luna was staying here. Grayson considered calling her sister to let her know she’d made it home, but she was exhausted. The idea of staying up all hours of the night to catch up with her sister made her eyes feel heavier. She’d call her in the morning.

  There was a note waiting for her on the table with instructions on feeding the fish, watering the plants, and letting out the cats. She looked around and didn’t see any cats. Maybe they were already outside. She shrugged and made her way to the spare bedroom down the hall, only barely noticing the photos of her childhood that lined the hallway.

  Grayson shed her clothes and crawled between the cool sheets. She was dead on her feet, but sleep wouldn’t come. She twisted and turned, trying to get comfortable in the strange bed. What gives? She thought irritably. She should have been sleeping like a baby after driving for two days.

  She wondered what Josh was doing—if he was going to come after her or let her go. As much as she hated to admit it, she was terrified, he would track her down.

  And do what? Make her leave with him? She needed to get a grip. She controlled her life, not him.

  What about the guy from the coffee shop? Just the mere thought of him made her pulse quicken. It was crazy the way he made her body come alive just from a look. She toyed with the idea of calling him, just because she could, but she tossed out that idea almost instantly. She played their meeting over and over again in her head; his sure stance, his unusual eyes, and the electricity when he touched her.

  No, she would definitely not call him.

  She must have fallen asleep, because she was jerked awake late in the night by a loud thud. She bolted upright, her heart pounding as she listened intently.

  What the hell was that?

  Grayson grabbed the blankets, and her eyes darted around the room, her heart pounding. For a moment, all was silent, but then she heard another noise that sounded like something scraping across the floor in the kitchen. She bit back a shriek, and found herself wishing Josh was with her.

  What the hell is wrong with me? Grayson gritted her teeth. She didn’t need a man to make her feel safe. She tossed the blankets off and tiptoed across the room, looking for something she could use for a weapon.

  Tension tightened her neck and shoulders as Grayson grabbed a big statue of Lakshmi, the Hindu goddess of prosperity and earth. Her mom would be pissed if she broke it, but it was the best she had in the situation. She was glad that Ethan had insisted they all take self-defense classes. She knew she could hold her own against most guys. It was just hard to remember that when fear coursed through her.

  “Come on, Lakshmi. Don’t fail me,” Grayson muttered under her breath as she slid along the wall into the living room. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up. It was too quiet. Maybe she imagined the noise, or dreamed it.

  Her eyes adjusted slowly as she squinted to look into the kitchen, but she didn’t see anything other than shadows dancing on the wall from the trees swaying outside—which was creepy enough. A shiver ran down her spine.

  She was so focused on looking into the kitchen; she nearly had a heart attack when she felt something brush up against her leg.

  “Holy shit!” she screeched, jumping backwards into the wall; her gaze falling to the floor.

  A fat white cat sat at her feet and purred, his heart-shaped face turned up towards Grayson.

  “Where did you come from?” She leaned down and picked up the furball. Her heart settled back into place. “You must have been hiding in mom’s room.”

  Feeling much calmer, Grayson turned on the kitchen light and glanced over the room. A cereal box she’d noticed on top of the fridge earlier in the night was now on its side on the linoleum, and tiny circlets of cereal were scattered across the floor. She laughed again; too elated to find there wasn’t an intruder to care that now she had a mess to clean up.

  As she did a walk through of the house just to make sure all was calm, two more cats came out of the woodwork. How many cats did her mother have? Had she become the crazy cat lady at the end of the street?

  She cleaned up the spilled cereal and returned the box to the top of the fridge, then paused at the back window while the small white cat entwined about her ankles. She could barely make out the lush greenery of the backyard; tree limbs swaying beneath ethereal white moonlight. It looked peaceful and calm and worlds away from Arizona. When was the last time she had really felt safe? Certainly not since the first-time Josh’s temper flared.

  Well, she was sick of being scared all the time. She was stronger than that.

  It’s time to take my life back, Grayson thought firmly.

  CHAPTER 7

  The next morning, Grayson was able to enjoy a quiet breakfast alone with the cats. She checked in with her mom who was in the middle of a class on “using doilies in scrapbooking”, and then she called her brother, Ethan, to set up a time to visit. She tried calling Luna, but got her voicemail. After shooting her a voicemail to let her know she was at Mom’s house, Grayson laid down on the couch in front of the TV and stayed there all day.

  The doorbell woke her up from a nap later that afternoon. Groggy, she rolled off the couch to answer it, the hardwood cool beneath her feet. When she swung the door open, she found the mirror image of her own face: long strawberry blonde hair, a sprinkle of freckles, clear blue eyes set in an oval face with full lips.

  Grayson’s twin pulled her into a crushing bear hug.

  “I can’t believe you finally dumped that jackass.” Luna’s voice was muffled in Grayson’s hair.

  Pulling back from the hug, Grayson grinned. “I figured you’d approve.”

  “Damn straight!” Luna shoved past her and kicked the door shut. “And now for the first time in your life, you are going to have some fun.”

  Grayson groaned. Her twin sister was her polar opposite. Luna was outgoing, outspoken, and always the life of the party. She rarely settled down with a guy for longer than three months, her reasoning being life was too short and there were too many men to experience.

  Not slutty at all, Grayson thought with a laugh.

  Grayson had always been slightly envious of her sister’s carefree ways, but it just wasn’t her style. They looked the same, but they were wired differently. Her mother claimed it was because Luna was left-handed and Grace was right-handed. Just another one of her mother’s quirky theories.

  “I called you ea
rlier. Where were you?”

  “Work. Gotta pay the bills, you know.” Luna looked around the living room. “Where’s Mom?”

  “Some scrapbooking retreat.”

  “Ah, I forgot about that. She’s had it planned for ages. Well, that works in our favor.” Luna said with her devilish smirk. “We don’t have to explain why you won’t be returning home tonight.”

  Grayson slanted her eyes at her sister and frowned. “I’m not sure I like the sound of that.”

  “Grace, have you looked around this town? It’s a hot bed for sexy beasts. They are everywhere. This town is crawling with soldiers, and half of ‘em are just passing through the base for training.”

  Grayson liked the sound of hot guys just “passing through.” If there was one thing she knew, it was that she wouldn’t get into another long-term relationship—at least, not for a very long time. She needed to work on herself.

  Luna breezed into the kitchen. She never missed anything, immediately honing in on Grayson’s discarded Starbucks cup from the night before. Luna picked it up from the counter and spun it in her hands. “Who’s Derrick?”

  Grayson’s face flushed as the memory of last night’s Starbucks meeting crossed her mind. The harder she tried to forget about the sexy stranger, the more she thought about him. It was annoying.

  Luna smirked. “Only here a day and already got a number. I’m impressed little sister.”

  Grayson rolled her eyes. Luna loved to throw it in her face that she was the older sister. It had been ongoing all their lives, and it was ridiculous. “You’re only two minutes and fifteen seconds older than me. Isn’t it time we let the whole older/younger sister thing go?”

  “Stop avoiding the question.” Luna raised an eyebrow and stared down at the cup.

  “Just some guy who gave me his number at Starbucks yesterday. He’s no one.” Grace grabbed the cup from her sister’s hand and tossed it into the garbage can under the counter.

  “Was he hot? ‘Cuz if you don’t want him…” Luna headed for the trash can.

  Desperate to get her sister’s attention off the phone number subject, Grayson spoke up loudly. “I was thinking about heating up a pizza. Are you hungry older sister?”

  It was exactly the distraction that continuously served her well—Luna was always hungry. “I’m starving,” her twin responded, doing an about-face and headed towards the freezer.

  Grace waited until Luna had her face in the freezer, and then pulled off the sleeve of the cup and shoved it into her pocket. She had no idea what possessed her to do such a thing. It wasn’t like she was ever going to call the guy. Right?

  Luna turned, pizza box in hand, and narrowed her eyes at Grayson. “You need to put on some weight. I don’t want to be known as the chubby twin.”

  Grayson rolled her eyes. “You’re far from overweight, and you know it.”

  “Still. You’re too skinny.”

  “Fine. I’ll even have desert. Would that make you happy?”

  “Very.”

  “Where are you staying? I thought you would be at mom’s house.” Grayson leaned against the counter and watched her sister pull the pizza out of its sleeve.

  “I got a little studio apartment close by. You know me and mom can’t get along long enough to live together.”

  That was true, Luna drove their mother crazy. Their mother didn’t agree with her lifestyle or choices, and Luna wasn’t one to keep her opinion to herself. Grayson thought it was really because they were too much alike, but neither of them liked to hear that reality.

  “It’s weird,” Grayson said. “The whole family’s back together after going our separate ways.”

  Luna shrugged. “Not really. Ethan’s always been the esteemed child, so it makes sense that mom would follow him. I hated being in Florida, and you took off to the “wild west”.

  Grayson already missed Arizona. Her love of geology had been the driving force of moving across the country, but once she realized how many science classes she would need, she’d changed her degree to counseling. Grayson left midway through her senior year to get away from Josh. Panic rose in her chest as she wondered if she’d made a huge mistake. She should have at least gotten her degree before she split. Her decision to leave was rash and not carefully thought out at all. And she wouldn’t be going back.

  “Earth to Grace,” Luna said, waving her hands in front of Grayson’s face.

  Grayson snapped out of it and focused on her sister again. “What?”

  “I said has Ethan come by?” Luna opened the oven and slid in the pizza.

  “No, not yet. I’m supposed to go over for dinner tomorrow. I’m surprised I caught him home. It seems like he’s always overseas these days.”

  “Yeah, he just got back, so he’ll be around for a few months. I’ll go with you. I haven’t seen the little demon spawns in a while.”

  “Luna! Don’t call them that!” Grayson laughed, because she knew it was true. Those kids were little terrors.

  Luna shut the oven and turned around. “Okay, let’s talk about what you’re going to wear tonight.” She looked down at Grayson’s jeans and T-shirt with disdain.

  “Forget it. I’ll let you drag me to a bar, but you’re not dressing me. We’re not six years old anymore.”

  “You still dress like you’re six years old. It’s time to outgrow the tomboy look Grace. I’m surprised you’re not wearing a baseball cap.” Luna laughed. “Remember when you tried to convince everyone you were a boy? I told you I would never let you live that down.”

  Grayson ignored her jab, even though it was true. When she was young, she hated all the attention they got as twins. Everyone called them pretty and fussed over them as if they were some kind of oddity. Grayson had thought if she was a boy, she wouldn’t have to deal with so much attention. Let’s just say that plan backfired, and only brought her more unwanted attention.

  “I’m not getting dressed up. That’s your thing not mine.” Grayson folded her arms across her chest. She drew the line at clothing.

  Luna tapped her lip and sighed. “Alright, you know I enjoy the attention more than you anyway.”

  “Obviously,” Grayson said as she walked over to the fridge. She pulled the lemonade out and poured them both a drink. It was tart and cold, just the way she liked it. The smell from the pizza cooking soon filled the room, and both of their stomachs rumbled at the same time. They broke into laughter. Just like old times.

  Okay, so maybe having a twin wasn’t that bad.

  “So what was the straw that broke the camel’s back? Why did you finally leave that loser?”

  Grayson looked down at the floor. She wasn’t about to tell her sister the truth, she didn’t need Luna to get arrested for assault. She just shrugged, “It just wasn’t working out anymore.”

  “Did he hurt you? Because I swear I will string him up by his testicles if he did.”

  Called it, Grayson thought, thankful that she didn’t tell Luna the real story.

  “No, it’s nothing like that. I was just sick of his jealousy.”

  “Hmm. I’m just glad you left him. He changed you, and not in a good way.”

  Grayson could tell Luna wasn’t buying her jealousy story, but glad she didn’t harp on it.

  “Well, it’s behind me now. One of my stupid mistakes; live and learn and all that shit.” Grayson knew her sister had questions, but she didn’t want to talk about Josh or her life back in Arizona. She changed the subject. “Where are we going tonight?”

  “There’s a bar near the hotels by the mall called The Trap. It’s where the guys who are only in town for a short time hang out. Usually under two weeks in town. Great place to have a fling, trust me.” Luna gave one of her wicked grins.

  “Well that’s a lovely name, The Trap.” It sounded rather ominous to her, but she’d learned long ago that it was pointless to argue with her sister. Every time Luna had a bright idea, she dragged Grayson with her, willingly or kicking and screaming.

  Grayson
mulled the idea over in her head. Truth be told, she’d always wondered what it would be like to have a one-night stand. Hell, she’d never had sex with anyone other than Josh. Maybe it was time to broaden her horizons.

  Slowly, she nodded. “Okay. I’m sure it will be fun. We haven’t hung out in forever.”

  “Oh, it will be fun alright,” Luna said while doing one of her famous happy “I got my way” dances.

  Something told Grayson she would probably regret going, but what the hell?

  They sat in the living room eating pizza and catching up for the rest of the afternoon. When Luna made her way to the bathroom, Grayson pulled out the sleeve that was cutting into her leg and shoved it under the chair cushion.

  Just in case.

  CHAPTER 8

  Luna pulled the car into a gravel parking lot behind a building that looked more like a log cabin than a bar. A neon sign above the door announced, “The Trap”—the R flickered in and out of animation. Several people waited in line to get inside, and the music was so loud it could be heard from the car.

  Pulling down the visor, Luna applied mascara and then offered it to Grayson, who just shook her head. Sighing, Luna tossed it back into her purse. “Remember, walk in like you own the damn place. Head up, shoulders back, and make eye contact.”

  Grayson rolled her eyes. Her sister was so dramatic. “This isn’t a movie.”

  “Seriously, no one knows who you are,” Luna said, fluffing her hair in the rearview mirror. “These people don’t need to know you’re a nerdy bookworm who wouldn’t know a good time if it bit her in the ass.”

  Grayson glared at her, but Luna just smiled sweetly and went on, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life little sister.”

  Grayson had to laugh at that. She’d thought the same thing on the long drive from Arizona. She really did need to turn over a new leaf, which was why she’d agreed to this in the first place. Glancing back at the bar, Grayson took in a deep breath. Here she was, about to walk into a bar full of soldiers, and she might even take one home. Josh would have been pissed. The thought of making Josh pissed only fueled her fire, and gave her the confidence to let go and have fun.