Did I hurt his feelings or something? He’d get over it, of that I was sure. I’d be a distant memory in a matter of minutes.
• • •
The following night was my date with Sawyer. I was especially excited because Holly had gone home for the weekend, and Sawyer was planning to spend the night…for the first time. I wasn’t sure if we would have sex, but I borrowed condoms from Sharon down the hall, just in case I was ready.
We got back from a late dinner around ten p.m. and decided to settle in and watch a movie. We snuggled and drank white wine as we watched the film. Sawyer gently caressed my back and shoulders. I could feel his emotion in his touches; he was just as content as I was. Feeling that in his touch turned me on beyond belief.
We kissed and held each other as the night continued. The touch of his hands was amazing. The warmth of his breath on my skin was exhilarating. I felt the passion begin to well up deep inside me. I wanted him, but didn’t want to rush into anything too quickly. I wanted to savor every intimate moment.
“I, um…I have to tell you something,” I said as he caressed the dip in my collarbone.
“Anything.” Sawyer leaned back on his elbow, giving me his full attention.
“Um…this is embarrassing, but I’m…well, I’m a virgin.”
“Really?” he asked with a smile.
“Yeah.” I pursed my lips, dreading his reaction.
“That’s kind of awesome.” He was grinning from ear to ear.
“What?”
“I mean it,” he insisted. “I’m impressed, Sun.”
“You are?”
He nodded.
“Wow, um, okay. I wasn’t expecting that.”
“I’m not, though. I hope that’s all right.”
“I didn’t expect you to be. I mean, you’re a sophomore, you’re in a frat…”
“Believe me, Sun, there are virgins in my frat.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah,” he said with a cocky grin. “It’s not like they get us laid as part of initiation.”
“Of course not, but I guess I just assumed.”
“Listen, I’m never going to pressure you.”
“Thanks. I just wanted to tell you before things…you know, happened with us.”
“Sunny, we don’t have to sleep together tonight. In fact, I wasn’t even thinking that we were ready for that. I just want to be with you. I don’t want you to rush into anything that you aren’t ready for.”
“You’re incredible. Do you know that?” I giggled, kissing his neck and ear.
“Yeah, I try.” Sawyer’s voice grew husky, and I could feel his arousal through his jeans. “Seriously, though, let’s wait. And you can tell me if and when you’re ready.”
“Agreed,” I said. Just as we began to kiss again, my room phone rang. I looked at the clock. It was three fifteen a.m. “Who would be calling me this late?”
“Don’t answer it,” Sawyer begged as he stroked my hair and nuzzled my neck. “Stay here with me. Don’t get up.”
I did as he asked, but stared across the room at the flashing red light of my voice mail. Someone had left a message at three in the morning? What if it was Claudia? Or Grace? What if they were hurt?
And then my cell rang. I slid out from under Sawyer, turning to face him. “I’m sorry, I just—I have to make sure my friends are okay.”
I picked up my phone, not expecting to see the name that was displayed. Not even for a second.
Xander.
The voice mail alert dinged. Next, my phone chirped with a text.
“Wow, someone really wants to get a hold of you.”
“Yeah,” I said, sitting back on the bed, suddenly uncomfortable.
“What is it? Read your text.”
“I don’t need to,” I said, my phone dangling from my hand.
“You’re acting weird. What’s going on?” A cocky grin spread over his face. “What, are you seeing someone else?”
Sawyer tickled my sides and my phone dropped to my mattress. He grabbed it and stood, crossing the room.
“Sawyer, c’mon, don’t read my texts.”
But it was too late. He read the text from Xander as I buried my head in the nearest pillow.
Hey, Sunny. I’m here on campus and I want to see you. Maybe you’re out partying or you’re asleep. Either way, you can call me on my cell. I’ll come over there, whatever, I don’t care. I just want to see you.
“Sorry.”
“Friend of yours?” The time for jokes had passed. Sawyer swallowed hard before placing the phone on my desk.
I was completely mortified. I hadn’t heard from Xander in months. How was I going to explain this one? And what would I do if he called back again?
“So, who’s Xander?” Sawyer asked with an uncomfortable laugh.
“Well—”
Just as I began, there was a loud knock on my door. Sawyer and I both jumped at the loud thumping that came out of nowhere.
“Sunny!” a drunken Danny Waterson yelled from the hallway. “Sunny Mac, are you there? Let me in!”
“Oh my God!” My face pressed into the pillow. I picked up my head, only to see a very confused and disappointed Sawyer staring at me, searching for answers. Why had I become so popular at such an early hour? Should I answer the door or just let Danny go away?
“Do you want me to get the door?” Sawyer asked, obviously torn between his jealousy and his desire to protect me from some weirdo on the other side of my door.
“No, it’s okay. It’s just a friend from high school. I ran into him earlier today and I think I may have hurt his feelings. I’ll be right back.”
Sawyer looked uneasy but he stepped to the side, allowing me full access to my bedroom door. He sat down on my bed and I opened the door, stepping into the hallway. Danny was crouched on the tile, trying to keep his head up. He looked up at me as I stood before him. His hair was tousled and his left eye was bruised, possibly from a fight.
“Mac, you’re home. Hiya.”
That was our code word back in high school. Oh good Lord. I did not need this bullshit.
“Hey. What on earth are you doing here? It’s three o’clock in the morning!”
“I wanted to see you.” He rose to his feet and I could smell the liquor on his breath. It had obviously been quite an evening for him at the bars. He reached up to touch my cheek, and I pushed his hand away gently. “You look gorgeous tonight, ya know?”
“Danny, you’re drunk. Please go home. I’ll talk to you next week, okay?”
“Why do I have to go home? Are you busy in there?” He craned his neck, looking into my room.
“Danny, just go home.”
“You are, aren’t you?” Danny stood up and pushed me aside. He opened my door and turned on the lights. Sawyer stood up as soon as the lights were switched on. Thank God he was fully clothed.
“Oh, sorry, man,” Danny said as he placed his hand on the wall to keep from falling over. “Didn’t mean to interrupt. In-ter-rupt.” He enunciated each syllable, raising his eyebrows up and down.
I rolled my eyes.
“It’s all right, man. But I think you’d better go.” Sawyer stood tall, crossing his arms in front of his puffed-out chest. And that protective movement, as silly as this might sound, it turned me on. Like a lot. He was jealous. And I liked that too.
“Got it. I’ll see my way out.” Danny chuckled. “Sunny and I are just…old friends.” He wiggled his eyebrows again.
“It’s okay. Do you want us to call you a cab?”
“No, I’m fine, man. Thanks.” He reached out to shake Sawyer’s hand. Sawyer took a step forward, shook Danny’s hand once, and immediately returned to his protective stance. “Take good care of this one. She’s quite a catch.”
And with that, Danny stumbled out of my room and down the hall toward the elevator. As I closed the door, I heard him talking to someone from the floor. I worried that he would get me in trouble for being an unescorted guest. Hopefull
y, whoever it was would be understanding and not run to Tracey, our resident advisor. The last thing I needed was my RA knocking on my door because of a floor violation.
After closing the door, I returned to sit next to Sawyer where he sat on the edge of the bed, his forehead leaning into his hands. I wasn’t sure where to start my explanations. I was terrified of losing him, yet so turned on by his protective reaction to Danny’s presence in my room.
Attempting to lighten the mood with humor, I gently poked his arm and said, “So, I guess you didn’t know that I was the most popular girl at Weston, eh?”
He took a deep breath and then turned his face toward me, revealing brows pinched together over worried eyes. His gaze roamed over my face, as if trying to determine my sincerity, but he said nothing.
“Sawyer, I’m so sorry. I’ll tell you everything, okay?” I laughed nervously, hoping I hadn’t ruined everything that he and I had started.
He sighed. “You don’t have to. It’s okay.”
“No, you have to hear me out.”
“Fine, if it’ll make you feel better, go ahead. I’m listening.” His expression softened and I took his hands in mine.
“Xander is my ex. We broke up a long time ago, and apparently he’s looking for a hook-up or something…I guess I’m comfortable or safe or whatever. But I have no intention of revisiting anything with him.”
Sawyer nodded as he listened, although his eyes were narrowed and his brow still creased. I didn’t want him to think that I had a string of guys in my past who could call my room at any moment. Sawyer was special and I wanted him to trust me.
“And Danny, who you just met, was my boyfriend from my freshman year in high school. We’ve only seen each other on campus twice this year, but once was today. I honestly don’t know why he showed up tonight. Our past is so clean, there really aren’t any hurt feelings. Everything happened so long ago. I was fourteen, for God’s sake!”
“Well, it sounds like I’d better be nicer to you.”
“Why is that?” I asked, confused. How much nicer could he be?
“Because you have a fan club. I don’t want any of these guys to steal you away. Especially since you’re not even my girlfriend yet.”
I smiled. “Well, that can change any time you’d like.”
“Really?” he asked with a lopsided grin.
“Absolutely.”
“Well, how about right now? Can we change that right now?”
I nodded. “Yeah. We can change that now.” I pressed my lips to his neck as we sank back into the bed.
“Thank God. I was getting a little nervous.”
Smiling, I said, “You have nothing to worry about. I promise.”
Sawyer laughed, his expression relaxing. “I believe you.”
“So…are you going to change your status?”
“My status?” He tilted his head in confusion. I guessed he wasn’t as keen on social networking lingo as I was. “On Facebook?”
“Oh…right. Of course. Should I do it now?”
“Nah. It can wait till morning.”
We fell asleep wrapped in each other’s arms. The next morning when I woke up, Sawyer was still sleeping soundly, covered in blankets. With a smile, I grabbed my cell phone and made a very important change.
Sunny McCormick is in a relationship with Sawyer Holcomb.
I stared down at the tiny screen, looking at the little red heart next to the sentence. I pressed the phone to my chest before placing it back on my desk and crawling back in bed with the boy of my dreams.
Chapter 24
Um… Now what?
Grace
Mid-March, a chilly Thursday afternoon
I had been dreading this day since the morning after my movie date with Trevor. That next morning, I’d opened my eyes and stared up at the ceiling, replaying all the romantic moments, especially the moment when I knew what I wanted, when I knew who I wanted.
Trevor.
As exciting as it was to have made my choice, that also meant I had to break things off with Ross. My stomach churned at the thought. This was brand-new territory for me.
That morning after making my decision, I had texted my girls, needing reinforcements. At breakfast, they had weighed in, each giving me advice on how to end things with Ross, but not look like the awful person that I felt like.
“Listen, it’s not a big deal,” Claudia had said before taking a sip of her orange juice. “Just call him.”
“And say what? Thanks, but no thanks?”
“No, no, no. He deserves a face-to-face.” Sunny’s tone was serious, insistent. “The guy took her out for Valentine’s Day. He should get more than a phone call.”
“Whatever.” Claudia rolled her eyes. “Guys get over things really quickly. Just rip off the Band-Aid, Gracie.”
“You guys are confusing me.”
“Here’s what you do,” Sunny said before taking a deep breath. “You meet him for coffee and let him down easy. That’s the only way to do it.”
“Oh man, I might have a panic attack.”
“It’ll be fine, I promise. I’ll coach you.”
“Coach her?” Claudia laughed. “I have got to hear this.”
Sunny glared playfully at Claudia before sticking out her tongue. She then turned back to me. “Listen, I like you…really, I do. But I think we’re better as friends—”
Claudia snorted. “Uh-uh. No way. Lame.”
“Lame?” Sunny crossed her arms over her chest. “All right, Miss Expert, what would you say?”
Claudia picked up her phone, pretended to dial, and then spoke. “Yeah, Ross. Hey. Listen, this isn’t going to work out. But take care.”
“You can’t be serious,” Sunny scoffed.
“I couldn’t do that.” I shook my head vehemently. Sunny was right; Ross deserved better.
“You wouldn’t do that to Libby,” Sunny insisted.
Claudia recoiled. “Because it’s a totally different situation. We’re a couple. Like, a real couple. Grace went on a few dates with the guy. They were never exclusive.” Her tone was stern but she wasn’t angry. “Show some respect, Sunny Dee.”
Sunny had rolled her eyes. “Okay, fine, whatever. I still think he deserves more than a phone call.”
“I do too,” I had said. “I’ll text him today and try to schedule something.”
Sunny had smirked at Claudia, who then shrugged and picked at her food.
God, I loved these girls. What on earth would I do without them?
So, today was the day. Or as Claudia called it, “DTSD” or “Dump The Scot Day.” I’d asked him to meet me at the coffee shop via e-mail, and hadn’t really been available to chat on the phone since that day. I had a feeling Ross already suspected something was up. I just had to be brave.
“Good luck,” Sunny said as I tucked my scarf into my pea coat. “You sure you don’t want me to come? I can pretend to study in the corner. He won’t even know I’m there.”
“No, it’s okay. I should do this myself.”
“Okay. Remember, he’ll be fine. Just be honest.”
“Thanks, Sun.”
“Of course.”
The wind was ridiculously strong today and I struggled to walk against it just to get to the coffee shop on time. By the time I opened the door to the warm shop, my nose was frozen and my cheeks weren’t far behind. I’d hoped to arrive before Ross so I could have a few minutes to mentally prepare again, but no such luck. He was already waiting for me with two cups of tea.
Remember what Claudia said…just rip off the Band-Aid.
“Hey,” I said, my voice cracking beneath the nerves that lingered in my throat.
“Hey, stranger,” Ross said, rising to his feet and kissing me on the cheek. “It’s been a while.”
“I know. I—I’m so sorry.”
“Totally fine. Midterms and all. No big deal.”
“Right.” I stared down at the table, at the thoughtful cup of steaming tea that sat before me.<
br />
“Are you okay? You seem a little nervous.” An uncomfortable laugh escaped his lips, and he crossed his arms over his chest, leaning in closer.
“No, I’m not.” I stuffed my hands in my pockets, feeling the palpable tension hanging above our table.
“What is it?” He stared at me with concern in his eyes, and I felt worse than I had just seconds before. He didn’t realize it had anything to do with him. He was feeling sorry for me. God, I was awful.
“I, um, okay, so…when you and I were dating—”
“Were? I didn’t know we were a ‘were’…” His words trailed off and when comprehension dawned, his expression changed. The concern had evaporated and was replaced with irritation.
“That’s, um…that’s the thing. I was seeing you and that was so nice. But I was seeing someone else, too.”
“Okay.” He leaned back in his chair, arms still crossed. He bit down on his lip and lines formed on his brow.
“And, um…he and I…I…” I stuttered. “We’ve decided to be exclusive.”
“Oh.” He nodded his head slowly, swallowing hard. “You’re dumping me, then?”
“Please don’t see it that way.”
Ross chuckled under his breath and scratched his chin, glancing out the window before locking eyes with me, his elbows digging into the table.
“There’s no other way to see it, I’m afraid.”
“I’m so sorry.” Tears were forming in my eyes, but I held them back. I had to be strong.
“It’s fine, really. I mean…” He paused, his posture slumped. “I’ll only be here for another couple of months. It was inevitable, no matter what.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Is that why?” He rubbed the back of his neck.
“What do you mean?” My chest tightened and I hugged my stomach with my arms, willing the anxiety to lessen.
“Is that why you chose him?”
Hesitation lingered on my open lips. I knew the answer that wouldn’t bruise his ego. If I told him that was the reason, he’d still feel good about himself, and he’d be less embarrassed. But then I remembered what Sunny had said. I had to be honest.
Sorority of Three: Freshman 101 Page 18