Secrets of My Hollywood Life #5: Broadway Lights

by Jen Calonita

  Austin starts to smile and I feel a rush of relief. "I love you too. You're the one I want to be with, Burke. And I promise to suck it up with the phone calls till you get home."

  He grabs my waist and pulls me toward him. I actually hold my breath, almost afraid it's not going to happen. But it does. Austin kisses me. I close my eyes and let the kiss take me away. His lips are soft--if a little chapped--and his kiss feels so nice and familiar. Most importantly, it reminds me of just how things should be and will be again.

  Monday, July 20

  NOTE TO SELF:

  Dinner with A, Rob, & the gang: Longhorn Steakhouse 6 PM.

  Flight home: 9 AM Tuesday.

  **Send A another care package! Pop Burger could B Good!

  MEETING OF THE MINDS con't.

  SCENE 14:

  Andie is cleaning out her locker. Leo walks up behind her and stops.

  LEO:

  Do you like sushi?

  ANDIE:

  (she looks up, surprised) I do like sushi.

  LEO:

  Good. Because I want to take you to this great sushi place. You'll love it.

  ANDIE:

  Are you asking me out on a date?

  LEO:

  I guess I kind of am. Is that okay? Or are you going to freak out again and wish you never told me anything?

  ANDIE:

  I'll be okay. But what about Jenny?

  LEO:

  I told you before, when you freaked out and ran off. Jenny knows we were over a long time ago. It's time to move on. Everyone has to. All we've got is the future, you know?

  ANDIE:

  You can't forget the past.

  LEO:

  No, but you can learn from it and make the future even better, don't you think?

  ANDIE:

  I do. At least I hope that's the way it works.

  (Leo grabs Andie's stuff and puts it into her backpack. Then he offers her his hand.)

  LEO:

  Want to go?

  ANDIE:

  I don't know. This is it, isn't it? The last time here, at this locker, in this place. It's kind of scary.

  LEO:

  Yeah, it is. But it sort of isn't. It's sort of exciting. (Andie laughs.) What's so funny?

  ANDIE:

  I was just thinking that this is my last ever day here and I'm walking out of school with the one boy I always wanted to walk into school with.

  LEO:

  Then let's take the long way out, and check things out one last time.

  ANDIE:

  Works for me.

  (Andie and Leo walk toward the back of the stage together and the stage fades to black.)

  THE END

  SIXTEEN: Back to the Future

  "Kaitlin, they're waiting for you!" The stage manager knocks on my door.

  "Got it!" I yell back, checking my reflection in the mirror before making my way backstage in my jeans and T-shirt combo for the last time.

  It's been three weeks since I visited Austin in, well, Austin, and the rest of my stint in the play and in New York has been blissfully smooth. I think I've finally gotten the hang of this stage thing, and even though Riley won't give me credit for it, I know I'm improving. She's not even offering me her opinion anymore. Even if she did, I wouldn't listen. I know I tackled something big, new, and scary and I survived. The same thing goes for me and Austin. Everyone else is doing okay too. Liz finished her writing and directing clinic and got an A-minus on her final project, the one starring Sky. Even better, they didn't kill each other doing it! They've sort of taken over the frenemies title that Sky and I used to share. Sky stayed in New York, as promised. She says it was to take meetings, but I know it was to hang with me and Liz. And Liz was surprisingly okay with that. The only ones not still okay with that are my mom and Laney. But we're about to change that.

  "Ready?" Sky meets me in the backstage hallway. She's obviously not in costume for a final night's performance so she looks much more appropriate for an audition than I do. Her raven hair is ironed straight and has grown a bit since the start of the summer, almost hitting her mid-back, which is bare thanks to the Versace dress she has on. The green floral print is a bit dizzying, but Sky says she's hoping it puts the people we're meeting with in a complete trance.

  I grab Sky's hand. "Are you sure you're ready for this? I mean, we've talked about it, but we haven't really talked about it."

  Sky sighs. "K..."

  "This is a big deal and we both keep skirting around the major issues. You say you like the pilot. You like the character. You like the character I would be playing, but you haven't said whether you think we can survive doing this together. This is a huge deal, Sky."

  "K...," Sky tries again.

  "Are we sure we want to go down this road again?" I ask. "What if my mom and Laney are right? What if we get on set and two days in we are back to hating each other again? What if our comic chemistry on SNL was a total fluke? What if we don't have the chops to do comedy? Or we stink in front of a live audience? What if the show bombs after three episodes and we're to blame? What if--"

  "K!" Sky yells and starts shaking me by the shoulders. "SHUT UP!"

  "Okay." I'm slightly horrified. She's never this loud.

  "I'm in, okay?" She straightens the skirt of her dress. "That's obvious, no? If neither of us wanted to do this, we wouldn't have taken it this far. We wouldn't be meeting with them tonight, two hours before you're doing your last performance in the play, to actually run through some scenes for the pilot. We wouldn't have our agents fly in and finesse the details of the deal. We wouldn't take phone call after phone call with the producers, the director, the network, and the casting folks assuring them that we could work together again peacefully." Sky flips her raven hair. "And I wouldn't have wasted the last two weeks working on the pilot with you when I could have been enjoying the Hamptons with your mom, who despite her dislike of me, actually appreciates my help with the Darling Daisies." Sky smiles wryly. "K, you may drive me nuts, but there is no one I'd rather be driven nuts by."

  I grin. "Me either, as bizarre as that sounds."

  "We should do this," Sky insists, and squeezes my hand. "It's a great pilot."

  "And awesome characters," I add. "A cool director."

  "A nice cast." Sky fills in the details. "Cool network, great perks, nice media coverage, good press. Good parking space, not that you have a car to park."

  I give her a smarting look. "But the best part, in case you forgot, is that we'd be back on TV again."

  "We'd be back on TV again." Sky smirks. "I thought that part was obvious. Seriously, K, sometimes I wonder where your head is."

  I hit her and her bony arm makes a light smacking sound. "We'd be doing what we love again--even if the show is only short-term and bombs--we'd be back on a set every day. I thought I had to get away from the daily grind to figure out what I wanted to do, but doing this play made me realize that what I wanted to do was in front of me the entire time. I like being on TV. I'm good at it. Why do I have to transcend and be a movie star?"

  "Sweetie, if only someone would say what you just said to Jennifer Aniston," Sky sympathizes. "It's good to know your strengths."

  "They're yours too, you know," I point out. "We work well shooting an episode every two weeks. Although I guess this would be every week now."

  HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER SIXTEEN: When you watch a sitcom and see in the credits the line: "shot in front of a live audience" that means the show really was taped in front of a live audience. But unlike the morning talk shows that air live in real time, these shows are taped live, but they aren't taped within actual time constraints. It could take hours to film a half-hour sitcom in front of a live audience. Sometimes they have to do scenes over and over from every angle. Sometimes they botch a take. Sometimes the audience laughter is (shhh...) dubbed in.

  "Well, I do well no matter how often we shoot an episode." Sky sounds defensive. "You just bask in my glow." I raise my arm to hit her again. "Okay!
You're talented too. Sort of. " She links arms with mine. "And I'll help you get even stronger as an actress. Comedy is my specialty. Didn't you see me on SNL? I killed."

  "Try to rein in the modesty when we talk to these guys, okay?" I deadpan.

  We make our way through the backstage area to the side door and then walk onto the street. Because it's so early, there is no crowd waiting to get into the play yet. Just people in the city walking by on their way home from work or to dinner or who knows where. That's the cool thing about New York City. People are always coming and going at all times of day and night so half the time I'm not recognized. I just blend right in.

  I'm going to miss it here, and our apartment, and how easy it is to get around, but it's time to get back to Los Angeles. Matty and Dad are already there, since Matty started taping Scooby, and every time they call, I get just the teensiest bit jealous when I hear one of them splashing in the pool.

  No one recognizes Sky and me as we walk a few blocks down to another building and through the revolving doors, then into the elevator and up two floors to the rehearsal space for Meeting of the Minds. Forest said we could use it for tonight's meeting with everyone from Small Fish, Big Pond. Or as they're calling it this week, Small Fries. (I like that name better.) Seth says this meeting is just a formality. So does Emmett Arrigan, Sky's agent. They claim that we've already gotten the job and they want to see us in person, ask a few questions, and watch us run a few lines. Since they were only flying in overnight and they need an answer by the weekend, I agreed to meet before tonight's performance. That's why I got ready early. I am sticking to my pledge of making every single show and being on time for all of them.

  I'm feeling pretty nervous as Sky and I walk the long corridor down to the conference room where we're meeting Seth and Emmett. And part of my nervousness has to do more with the fact that no one other than Seth, Rodney, Liz, Nadine, and Sky knows I'm here. Yep, I didn't tell Mom and Dad or Laney how far I've come with negotiations. I know they'll have to weigh in because I'm a minor, but I made Seth swear that he wouldn't say anything yet. He knows how much they're against me and Sky working together again. They'd FLIP if they knew what was going on tonight.

  SWOOSH!

  Before I know what's happening, two people jump in front of us and try to grab us, and Sky and I scream. Sky reaches inside her bag for pepper spray and I yell at the top of my lungs and start smacking the people with my snakeskin purse. If they damage the bag that has gotten me through my whole summer here in New York, I'm going to be furious.

  "STOP HITTING US! KAITLIN, STOP! IT'S MOM AND LANEY!"

  Sky and I stop screaming. I drop my bag and gasp in horror. It is Mom and Laney and they're seriously disheveled. Mom's hair looks like a rat's nest. Her Prada sunglasses are crooked and her white fitted blazer is twisted sideways. Laney isn't better off. Her hair was pulled back, but now the low ponytail is a mess and falling out. Any second Sky will accidentally spray her pepper spray on Laney's pretty teal Prada sundress and I'll never hear the end of it. ("Reese and Jake just got me this!")

  "You scared us," I scold. "What are you two doing here?"

  "I called them." Seth looks guilty as he appears around the corner and removes his shades. He must be sweltering in a navy blue Ralph Lauren suit. It's ninety degrees in the shade today and this is New York City! I know he wants to look professional, but still. "Kaitlin, they need to know what you're doing here or you'll never get this role. Your mom has to sign off. You're better off telling her now than later."

  Sky is cheerful. "I'm so glad my mom barely knows what I'm up to, let alone renders opinions."

  "This is what I'm talking about, missy!" Mom says to Sky, sounding more and more like an eighty-year-old Hamptonite. "You have no respect for authority or for my daughter. How can anyone expect me to allow you two to work together again? I don't like SKAT! You would hurt her again and I can't see that happen," Mom adds, sounding upset.

  "Aww, Mom!" I throw my arms around her stiff frame. "You're actually worried about my well-being." This is a totally new feeling from the parental unit and I'm a little misty just thinking about it. "I appreciate your concern, really I do, but I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself. And this is a great show, Mom. Ask Seth. He'll tell you."

  "He already has." Mom sighs. She looks at Laney. "We read it and we both love it. So much so that we're convinced that it will only last two episodes."

  "It's too smart for teens," Laney seconds.

  "Way to be supportive," Sky chides them.

  "If you want to go for this, sweetie, I'd rather be on board than kept in the dark like that little recon trip you took a few weeks ago." Mom raises her right eyebrow.

  "You know about Texas?" I squeak.

  Mom and Laney nod. "The photos of you and Sky boarding a private plane in the middle of a cornfield were all over TMZ along with the headline, 'SKAT GOES GLOBAL,' " Laney informs me. "You're lucky you made it back to New York on time. But I guess since you did, no harm done." She smiles thinly, which is big for her. "You've been relatively good all summer so I have no complaints." She looks at Sky. "I'll try not to have any about this new yet old working relationship either."

  I hug them both and squeal. I attempt to hug Sky too.

  "Eww, get off!" Sky freaks out. "No personal affection, K. I hate that."

  "We should get in there," Seth cuts in. "They're waiting for us."

  "Go get 'em, Kate-Kate," Mom says encouragingly, and Laney winks. "We'll be waiting right here."

  I nod, and then with Seth and Sky beside me, I walk through the door and prepare to find out what my future holds.

  * * *

  Before I know it, the curtain is rising on my last ever performance of Meeting of the Minds. My biggest fear about tonight's show is that I won't be able to hold it together. I know I'm saying every line for the last time. It's a little like how I felt shooting the last episode of Family Affair, but obviously not nearly as intense since I couldn't care less if I ever see Riley again. The first act runs smoothly and the second is going really well too. Since this really is the end though, I feel like I have to make some sort of peace with Riley.

  "Hey." We're in between scenes, in the quick-change area, and I tap Riley on the shoulder. "Thanks."

  "For what?" she asks, surprised. We haven't really been talking that much since I went out on my faux date with Dylan.

  "For teaching me that I don't need compliments all the time to know I'm doing a good job." It's true. Riley may have thought I couldn't hack it, and my reviews may not have been the grade A I was hoping for, but they were decent, and I know I gave this my all. That, I've learned, can be enough.

  Then as much as it kills me, I pay her a compliment. "I know I'm nowhere near the theater actress you are, Riley, but I feel fortunate to have been given the opportunity to do this and work with someone like you. You're really good at what you do."

  "Thank you." Riley is stiff. "Good luck to you, Kaitlin."

  "Good luck to you too." I smile.

  Nadine said something to me the other day that made sense of everything that's been happening with Lauren, Ava, and Riley. Not everyone you meet is going to like you, and that's okay. But in the spirit of maturity, I feel the need to say one more thing to Riley, since one thing I didn't do is invite her to my after-party with my family and friends. (I have to have some dignity, you know.) The cast already had a cake for me backstage before the show, and I ordered food for everyone before the play last night from Pop Burger, which is this popular mini burger joint in New York City that has sent their burgers to everyone from Jay-Z to Justin Timberlake. Now the Meeting of the Minds cast can be added to the list. "Riley?" I try to stop her before she walks away. "I just wanted you to know, Dylan still cares about you."

  She turns around. "My private affairs are mine. I don't choose to air my grievances in the rags."

  "True, but I thought you'd want to know, " I say awkwardly. "In case he doesn't tell you himself. Dylan does still care."r />
  She almost smiles at me. Almost--and then she walks away without another word.

  The second act flies by and I savor my last curtain call. Forest presents me with flowers and makes me cry. The audience gives me a standing ovation, which means a lot considering who is in the front row--my entire family. Matty and Dad flew in for the night as a surprise, which I realized halfway through the first act. Liz and Sky are here with Seth, Laney, Nadine, and Rodney, who is actually tearing up a little. This is the first time he's sat through the whole show since he's always with me backstage. Tonight I insisted he watch from the audience and I guess this means he likes it.

  Austin is here too. He finished camp last week, but Mom flew him back in to New York as a present for me. I notice he's holding the most magnificent bouquet of peach roses. He whistles and he and Matty yell my name. I take one last bow and then the curtain falls.

  Backstage there is a lot of commotion and hugging and chatting. I hug Forest the longest, thanking him for all he's taught me over the last few months. (Who knew I could cry on stage like that, every night without fail?) I trade e-mails and phone numbers with a few of the girls in the chorus and take one last group photo with the cast, then sign a bunch of cast photos. I also gratefully accept one that they've all signed for me as a thank-you. It's going to hang proudly in my room at home.

  And then I say goodbye to Dylan. I see him standing there, still in costume, which is a T-shirt and jeans, just like mine, and he looks good. There's just something about that aloof stance of his that makes me sort of swoon. But as Liz says, I also swoon over Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson, and I'm not leaving Austin for them either. (Besides which, Vanessa would just kill me if I broke the friendship code and went near Zac!)

  Dylan grins. "Congrats on a good run, mate." He hugs me loosely and I hug him back. "We're going to miss you around here."

  "I'm going to miss you guys too," I admit, "but I don't think I'm going to miss the schedule. Working every night is grueling! Yes, having mornings off is fun, but I'd like to be home to catch 90210 this fall."