She opened her eyes again, a faint smile touching her mouth as she turned to glance at him again then felt a shudder of sensation race through her when she saw that his eyes were open and that he was watching her. Just for a fleeting moment there was the fire of memory in his eyes then abruptly the flame was extinguished and replaced by a cool impersonality which chilled her.
When he tossed the clothes back and climbed out of bed, Laura watched without uttering a word because she couldn’t think of what to say when she was so afraid of what the answer might be. Luis glanced round at her, arching a brow mockingly when he saw that she was watching him.
‘I apologise if you were hoping for a repeat of last night’s very enjoyable interlude but unfortunately work must come before pleasure. I have to be at the airport in just over an hour’s time.’
Her face flamed at both the words and his tone but she forced herself to meet his gaze. ‘I understand, Luis. Last night was...special, wasn’t it?’
‘It was very satisfying for both of us, proof that I was right.’
Did he have to sound so impersonal? It felt more as though he was giving their lovemaking a score: so many points for technique, so many for the level of passion! She sat up against the headboard, drawing the sheet over her breasts as she stared back at him. ‘Right about what, Luis?’
‘The fact that we can both still gain some pleasure from this relationship. It will be some compensation at least, don’t you think?’
‘I don’t know what to think!’ She pushed the tangled length of hair back from her face. ‘You speak about compensation as though you feel you need something to make up for our marriage, but wasn’t last night proof that we have something special going for us?’
‘Last night we made love, Laura. We shared our bodies and found pleasure in doing so. I have never denied that I still desire you and there is no doubt that you feel the same. But if you are looking for something more from it then I am afraid you will not find it.’ He slid his arms into a towelling robe he had left draped over the end of the bed after they had both showered last night. Laura’s eyes dropped to the thick fluffy white fabric, remembering how it had felt when Luis had lifted her from the shower stall and wrapped her in the robe before carrying her back to the bed to continue making love. It had been just a few short hours ago yet now he slid the robe on and calmly dismissed the memories.
‘Then nothing has changed? You still feel the...the same about me?’ Her voice was quiet but he heard it because he turned to face her, and a shiver ran down her spine at the coldness of his expression.
‘That is correct. A few pleasant hours spent making love cannot erase what you did, Laura. However, it does mean that we can enjoy a far more comfortable future together, which is some compensation.’
‘Damn you, Luis! Damn you for your arrogance, your blindness, you cold-blooded self-righteousness! You won’t even try to bend a little, will you? You have made up your mind and that is how things are. But if you imagine I shall ever repeat last night’s mistakes then you are in for a shock!’
He walked calmly to the bed and sat down, ignoring the way she tried to shrink away from him as he slid a hand behind her head and drew her to him. With a galling ease he captured her mouth, his lips gentle yet insistent, wringing a response from her despite the anger and hurt she felt. When he had achieved what he had intended he let her go and stood up, smiling slightly as he studied her furious face and the trace of reluctant passion in her eyes.
‘You will repeat last night and eagerly, Laura. Any time I choose. So please don’t waste your breath telling me something we both know is yet another lie.’
He turned and walked into the bathroom, closing the door with a small final click that seemed to echo around the room. Laura snatched a pillow off the bed and threw it at the closed door then sank back as she realised the utter futility of the gesture. She could rant and rave, protest and threaten and nothing would change things. Luis knew that because he still held all the cards in his hands: Rachel and her father’s welfare, even ultimately the success of Jack’s business, and the final ace, the fact that she loved him.
How could she hope to beat a winning hand like that? And how could she face a future which was based on desire, not love? It might be enough for Luis, but she knew it would never be enough for her.
CHAPTER EIGHT
AFTER what had happened, Laura didn’t expect to miss Luis, but she did. She missed seeing him at the dinner table, missed hearing his deep voice as he made some polite comment, missed just knowing that he was close by. She loved him so much despite everything that his absence was like a physical loss. How he would gloat if he knew that was how she felt! It would emphasise just how effective his plans for revenge had been.
The time seemed to drag as the days crept past and almost reached a week. Laura tried her best to fill in the hours but was hampered by a vague feeling of lethargy which seemed to make everything such an effort. Her appetite was still not what it should be, and on a couple of occasions she had to get up from the table with a murmured apology when just the sight of the food on her plate made her stomach churn. Perhaps she was sickening for something, she thought, but it was too much of an effort to even worry about that.
Luis’s mother was quite uncharacteristically solicitous, begging her to rest, even suggesting that she should call her own doctor to visit Laura. But even though she appreciated this unexpected softening in the older woman’s attitude towards her, Laura refused the offer. The only thing that was troubling her was this situation between her and Luis, and no amount of pills and potions could cure that!
When Luis rang early on the morning he was due to fly home and coolly announced that he would be staying longer she found it impossible to hide her disappointment. Until that day, their conversations had been short and distant. It was expected that Luis would ring to speak to her and he carried out that duty religiously, each careful conversation a travesty of what it was supposed to be. Now, hearing the calm announcement, Laura couldn’t help but snap back at him.
‘I don’t know why you even bothered to phone and tell me! What difference would it have made if I had objected, Luis?’
‘None whatsoever. This is business and that must come before your childish outbursts.’ His voice was suddenly icily cold and tears stung her eyes. She’d felt particularly rotten that morning when she had woken up, a bout of nausea sending her hurrying into the bathroom. Now the knowledge of how little he cared about her feelings tipped her emotions over the edge.
‘It wouldn’t have mattered what it was! Anything would come before me. Isn’t that so?’ she snapped back in fury.
There was a faint but noticeable pause before he replied and she went hot at the note that touched his deep voice. ‘Are you missing me, querida? Or are you missing what I can make you feel?’
‘I have no idea what you’re talking about.’ She twisted the curling lead of the phone around fingers that suddenly trembled.
‘Oh, I think you have.’ He laughed softly, a husky intimacy in the sound. ‘I have missed you too, mi esposa, missed having you in my arms, missed the delights of your body. Is that what is wrong with you? Desire is such a potent addiction, pequeña. Once tasted it is almost impossible to do without.’
‘I...no! Don’t flatter yourself, Luis!’ She recoiled as though he was there in front of her rather than at the other end of a phone connection.
‘It isn’t flattery. It is the truth, and I cannot see why you are so determined not to admit it. Does it not fit with that image you have in your mind?’
‘What image? Look, Luis, if you—’
He continued as though she hadn’t spoken, his deep voice silencing her. ‘This image of being the poor rejected wife. You prefer to carry on making yourself believe that what you feel for me is love when in fact it is nothing half so complex, if such an emotion even exists, that is. You desire me, Laura, and you miss the satisfaction that I can give you. But do not fret, amada. Knowing how you are feel
ing, I shall do my best to return to you as soon as I can.’
He cut the connection and Laura put the receiver down as she tried her hardest not to cry. She could tell him that he was wrong, that she did love him, but he would never believe her because he didn’t want to. He wanted to keep their relationship within the limits he had imposed upon it but she didn’t think she could exist like that. When Luis came back then no matter what he threatened they would have to come to some sort of a decision about their future together, although she had no idea what it might be. All she knew was that living with him like this was destroying her.
That day seemed to drag even more than all the others. Doña Elena had an appointment in Seville and, although she offered Laura the chance to accompany her, Laura refused. She roamed around the huge house after the older woman had left, finding nothing there to occupy her despite the fact that the weather was gloriously hot and perfect for spending time in the pool. The enclosed pool area held too many disturbing memories for her to feel comfortable there while her emotions were so raw.
At a little before six she was sitting on the terrace sipping a glass of chilled lemonade when the sound of an engine broke through the silence. She set the glass down with a sharp clatter, her whole body tensing as she got up. Surely Luis hadn’t managed to cut short his trip after all? However, when she walked around to the front of the house it wasn’t Luis she found there but Domingo just climbing out of a racy red sports-car. He heard her approaching and turned to smile at her, his handsome face lighting up with that attractive smile that had won so many female hearts.
‘Laura, cómo estás? Although I do not need to ask how you are when I can see for myself that you are as beautiful as ever.’
Laura laughed at the effusive compliment. There was something almost boyishly charming about Domingo’s gallantry which was hard to resist. ‘And I see that you have lost none of your “charm”,’ she pretended to scold him.
He leant a lean hip against the bonnet of the car as he pushed his sunglasses up on top of his head and grinned at her. ‘A man has to try, especially in the presence of such a charming woman, and the woman he has come to beg to take pity on him.’
‘The last thing I imagine you need is any woman’s pity!’ She walked the last few steps to stand in front of him, shading her eyes against the glare from the sun.
‘Then that shows how wrong you can be to go by appearances. I am doomed to spend a lonely evening unless I can prevail upon your generous nature to have dinner with me.’
‘I am quite sure that there are any amount of beautiful women who would bite your hand off to receive such an invitation, so why choose me, Domingo?’
‘I enjoy your company, Laura.’ He shrugged carelessly, a faint sadness in his face suddenly. ‘And frankly just right now I am not interested in starting up a relationship with a woman. I have just—how do you say—yes, just had my fingers burned.’
‘Oh, I see. Well, you do have my sympathies, Domingo,’ she said softly. ‘But I don’t know if I can offer you a shoulder to cry on tonight.’
‘Why not? I know Luis is still away. Mercedes mentioned it when she phoned earlier in the day to warn us that she would be changing her flight home.’
‘Your sister is away somewhere?’ Laura asked the question almost automatically as she pushed her hair back from her face. The sun was still hot despite the hour and she could feel perspiration beading on her forehead.
‘Mmmm, in Amsterdam. I thought you knew because she has seen Luis while she’s been there.’
The shock was so great that Laura felt all the blood drain from her face. Domingo must have noticed her reaction too because he stepped forward at once, but Laura put out a hand to fend him off. ‘No, I’m fine. Just a touch too much sun, I believe.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Yes, really.’ She seemed to be functioning on two levels, one part of her reeling in pain from the shock of what she’d learned while the other somehow found the strength to make the polite dismissal of Domingo’s concern. Was that the real reason why Luis had decided to stay away longer—because he wanted to spend more time with Mercedes?
‘And I am just making matters worse by keeping you here.’ Domingo slid the glasses down on to his nose with a smile of apology. ‘I understand if you cannot accept my invitation of course, Laura. You probably don’t feel like it if you have been out in the sun too long.’ He started to swing himself back into the driving seat, obviously intending to leave, but suddenly Laura knew that was the last thing she wanted. Doña Elena was staying overnight with friends after she had attended to some business and tonight of all nights Laura didn’t want to be by herself. She didn’t think she could stand the thought of sitting in the huge empty house wondering what Luis was doing!
‘I would love to come, Domingo. If you will just give me a few minutes to change?’ She forced a smile and held it determinedly.
‘You would? Wonderful! Take all the time you need, Laura. There is no need to rush.’
‘Ten minutes,’ she stated flatly, and turned to hurry inside the house. Somewhere deep inside, pain was tearing away at her, but she refused to bow down under its force now. Later she would have to deal with it of course...but not just yet. Not until she felt as if she was strong enough to cope.
The evening wasn’t a success despite the fact that Domingo went out of his way to be a charming and attentive companion. He drove them up to Sanlúcar de Barrameda, a historic town just north of Jerez from where Columbus set off on his third trip to America and Magellan set off to sail around the world. With its golden sand beaches and beautiful old buildings, Laura knew she would have enjoyed seeing the town at any other time but not while she was fighting the demons in her mind.
She sipped a glass of the delectable sherry the town produced, called manzanilla, and pretended to listen to what Domingo was saying but that was what it was: pure pretence. If she had closed her eyes then she would have seen vivid evidence of what filled her mind, pictures of Luis and Mercedes together. She didn’t think she could bear it!
She set the glass down, unaware that she spilled most of the wine on to the table, her eyes misted with tears. Domingo sighed, his face suddenly very grave. ‘I think, Laura, that this has been a mistake. I have merely upset you rather than cheered myself up.’
There was something rather self-centred about his simple assumption, but Laura preferred that explanation to the truth. ‘I’m sorry, Domingo. I have been poor company when you needed someone to listen to your troubles and offer a few words of advice.’
He sighed quietly, staring down at his empty glass. ‘The thing I need most, Laura, is to face up to how I feel, and that scares me. Admitting you love someone is a terrifying thing to do. There is always the chance that you will have your love rejected.’
Didn’t she know that? Only too well, in fact. With a murmured excuse she pushed her chair back while Domingo signalled to the waiter for the bill. Hurrying into the ladies’ rest-room, she ran water into the bowl and washed her hands, giving herself time to collect herself again. She was silly to take Domingo’s wry words to heart so much. It was just that her nerves were so raw at present and it didn’t help that she was beginning to feel nauseous again although she’d taken care to avoid any overly spicy dishes on the extensive menu. The bouts of sickness were starting to become a nuisance; only that morning she’d had to rush to the bathroom as soon as she’d got up...
She stared at her reflection in the mirror above the basin, her grey eyes wide with shock. How could she have been so stupid? The signs had all been there but she’d been so caught up in the misery of her situation that she’d overlooked them. She dried her hands on a towel then opened her bag and searched through it with hands that shook until she found her diary and started checking dates then sat down abruptly on the velvet-covered chair and closed her eyes.
She was pregnant. It was the only thing that made sense and could explain the lethargy, the nausea and increasing bouts of sickness.
How could she have been so dim-witted as not to realise it sooner? But what was going to happen now? Would this bring her and Luis closer, or would it drive them even further apart? Would he want the child, when he hated her so much?
Tears welled up in her eyes but she blinked them away. She couldn’t start to think that way now. She had to hold on to her composure until she was safely back in the Casa de Flores, then she would think it all through and decide which way she was going to approach Luis with the news.
She got up to go then paused as she caught sight of herself in the mirror. One hand slid to her stomach and pressed lightly against its flatness as though by touching it she could feel the child growing there. No matter what happened between her and Luis she wanted this child and would love it. It was a part of him which would always belong to her.
* * *
It was almost one a.m. before Laura stepped from the taxi in the driveway. She said goodnight to the driver then walked wearily towards the house with a heavy sigh. It must have been Fate that had dictated that Domingo’s racy red car should break down tonight. It had taken them hours to find a garage willing to send out a mechanic to the vehicle but even then it couldn’t be mended. A new radiator would have to be ordered from England before the car would be back on the road. Laura had left Domingo still arguing forcibly with the mechanic, ignoring his protests that he would accompany her if she would wait, to get into the taxi she’d managed to summon. She only wished that she’d had the foresight to call it a couple of hours earlier, then she wouldn’t be getting in so late.
She climbed up the shallow steps to the front door and felt in her bag for the key, then jumped when the door was suddenly swung open.
‘Where in the name of all the saints have you been?’
She was so surprised to see Luis standing there that she stared at him without uttering a word and heard him curse roughly. He caught her under the elbow and half lifted, half dragged her inside, towering over her. ‘I asked you where you have been until this hour. Now answer me, Laura!’
Spanish Nights (Harlequin Treasury 1990's) Page 11