by CJ Azevedo
“You know this just may be the shittiest day of my life, right?” I hear from behind me, looking up from admiring my sexy metallic shoes to see Jax’s reflection behind me. His words may be solemn and crude on the happiest day of my life, but he’s smiling from ear to ear.
“I don’t believe that for a second, Jackson Lee Andrews,” I tease as I gather my dress carefully and spin around to face him. He comes to me and gathers me up tight in his arms. I wrap mine around his waist, careful to keep my head pulled back not to mess up my hair and make up on his chest.
“I’ve imagined this day a million times, babe, but I was wearing the special tux, not this boring suit.” He’s still smiling but I know he means his words. Jax never really let go of the idea of us.
“Oh, Jax.” I sigh, because really, what do I say? We’ve been on this merry-go-round time and time again.
“He’s the lucky bastard, you know that, right? Don’t go into this thinking you’re the one winning the prize. Declan’s great and I’m happy for you, really, I am, but he’s the one who’s hitting the lottery tonight, baby. Tell me you believe that and I’ll smile through the rest of this torturous event,” Jax says seriously.
I’ll tell him I believe it because I do, to an extent, but that’s not an argument I’ll win with this lawyer. Declan is my prize and I believe we’re both hitting the lottery tonight; we get each other for the rest of our lives.
“I do believe that, Jax,” I say quietly.
He leans down and kisses my cheek softly. “I love you, Ava, I always will,” he whispers before taking a deep breath and straightening himself. “Now let me take you out to your future husband before he hunts me down and beats my ass.” Jax cracks a smile and pulls me from the bridal suite.
I thought about asking Max to walk me down the aisle, but before I had the chance, he told me his idea instead. I had gone over for coffee one morning and out of the blue he said, “The reason you have someone walk you down the aisle is so that person can give you away. They can only give you away if they’ve had you; typically it’s your father, but not always.”
I asked him if he was telling me this because he did or didn’t want to walk me down the isle and his response was, “This has nothing to do with me, sweet girl. You’ve had one constant in your life since you were old enough to grasp what love and relationships mean. For almost ten years now you’ve had a friend who’s loved and protected you, who’s been your family through everything. That’s who needs to be giving you up and giving you away to your husband.”
When I called and asked Jax to walk me down the aisle and give me away, he hung up on me. It took him two days to call me back and tell me he would do it. I didn’t have to ask the questions that I knew he didn’t want to give me answers to and he didn’t have to tell me the thoughts he knew I didn’t want to ask about. He simply said he would do whatever I needed him to do and we never talked about it again.
Now we’re standing in front of lavish double doors that keep us shielded from the three hundred or so guests (I stopped asking). Jax is standing tall next to me, holding me steady with my arm tucked safely inside his. The wedding party has already lined up, including a very antsy Harper, who refused to leave her Daddy’s side today. The wedding planner, who has been chirping into his earpiece/microphone and my ear all day long, is at it again. He’s more nervous than I am and it’s starting to freak me out.
“Okay, Ava, just remember to walk slowly, do not go too fast. Brides always go too fast and it screws up the thing with the music and when the music gets off then the officiant gets all screwed up and doesn’t know when to start and all of a sudden it’s like we’re a bunch of wild animals loose at a zoo. So please, for the love of God, Do. Not. Walk. Too. Quickly,” he stresses in one long breath.
Now all I can picture are animals running wild on the other side of the door. Great. Jax laughs quietly and rubs my arm. The guy counts down dramatically with his fingers as he silently mouths the numbers and then slowly opens the door to a room full of blurry faces, sheer gold material draped everywhere. Flowers stand tall in bouquets on the round tables where the guests are seated. The atmosphere is softened with rose-colored lighting and dramatized by the large crystal chandelier hanging above the small raised stage where Declan stands, looking simply edible. By the time I take in the room, we’ve reached our stopping point and I have no idea if we ran or crawled to get here; I sure hope we didn’t screw up. That poor wedding planner is probably having a heart attack right now if we did. I turn to Jax and whisper as he hugs me, “Did we mess up the music? Are there going to be wild animals?”
Jax laughs, kisses my cheek. “You’re perfect, Ava, now go get your perfect life started.” He places my hand in Declan’s before shaking Dec’s other hand.
We went with the modern version of the traditional vows. It was a fight I was willing to fight and I won; I did not want to write my own vows. I also did not want to say that I would “obey.” Dec had fun with that one for about a minute. Nonetheless, it didn’t matter, because I’m on autopilot the whole ceremony. I feel Dec’s warm strong fingers caressing my shaky, sweaty hands, and my gaze never leaves his beautiful smiling eyes. I know I say the words, but my brain focuses on the way his lips form the words of his vows to me and the way his eyes sparkle when he says, “I do.” I only become present to the here and now when he forcefully pulls me to him and takes my bottom lip into his mouth before pressing his tongue into mine. My hands go quickly up to his neck and I kiss him like haven’t seen him for weeks. I couldn’t care less that I know ten percent of these people in here.
The room erupts in loud cheers and whistles. Dec pulls back, but continues to hold me close. “I can’t wait to get you of this dress,” he says in a deep tone across my lips. “You are so sexy I’m not going to be able to wait until after this reception, Sunshine.”
I lose my breath. He kisses me one more time before the guys next to us start yelling at him to let me go so they can go get a beer.
I am now Mrs. Declan James and I have performed all of the acts that were requested of me today: Show up-check, get dressed-check, pictures-check, get married-check, get dressed again-check, first dance, throw bouquet, cut cake, eat dinner and dance-all checked. Now I’m exhausted and I’m sitting here outside, alone for once, drinking a Long Island Iced Tea. It’s probably a bad choice, but Keegan bought it for me and I gladly accepted. My feet are dead, my dress is sucking the life out of me, and I can barely keep my eyes open. Declan, the man who didn’t think he could wait to get through the reception, hasn’t left the bar or the dance floor once since we walked in. I haven’t been allowed to leave his side but I managed to sneak away. I need a break, a bed actually, but a break will do for now.
“No bride should ever be alone on her wedding night, especially not one as beautiful as you. Someone might steal you away.” I look up to discover who the unfamiliar voice belongs to and see Declan’s cousin, Talon McAllister. This man, he is gorgeous. Of course he looks a lot like my husband, so I could be a little biased, but still, gorgeous.
I smile up at him as my feet dangle from the stone wall I’ve perched myself on. He sits down next to me and we can hear the party carrying on to the right of us. “I could say the same to you about Bailey; I wouldn’t think you would let that one wander too far alone,” I say teasingly as I smile up at him.
Talon laughs and agrees with me. “You’re right about that one, she’s with my mom meeting a bunch of family members from out here or else I would have her on that dance floor. That woman can dance like nothing I’ve ever seen,” he says wistfully and I swear I can feel the love coming from him.
“When is it your turn to do this whole get up?” I nudge him with my elbow and he throws his arm around my shoulders, pulling me close.
“Not for a while; she’s not ready yet. But I am working on some things. She doesn’t know it yet, but I’m restoring an old house that she loves and I’m going to give it to her for an engagement gift.”
&
nbsp; I pat him on the knee. That is the sweetest thing.
Talon takes a deep breath then looks down at me seriously. “Ava, Dec told me everything you two have been through and I just wanted to tell you that I think you are incredibly brave and amazingly strong. If it were up to me to choose someone for that kid, it’d be you for sure. I couldn’t be more proud to have you as part of my family.” Talon kisses me on my forehead just as we hear, “Hey! There you two are!” from a kind and happy voice.
“Hey there, love, you were able to finally escape the mob, huh?” Talon teases Bailey as he stands and wraps her up tightly in his arms, kissing her soundly.
“Sunshine, where the hell have you been? I’ve been going crazy looking for you!” My man? Not so kind. A little deranged actually.
“I’m sorry, babe, I just needed a break,” I say tiredly.
“We’ll let you two have a few minutes of peace before you have to go back to the madhouse. I’ll let your mom know you’ve found her,” Bailey offers sweetly as Talon grabs her hand and prepares to walk away.
I’m getting ready to respond to her since Declan is just standing there staring at me when he finally makes his move, closing the distance between us and grasping my hand in his. I feel the cool metal of his wedding band as he entwines his fingers with mine.
“Actually, Bay, just tell everyone we said thank you and goodnight. My wife’s tired and I’m taking her to bed.” He doesn’t wait for her to answer, just walks towards the entrance of the hotel, pulling me behind him. I hear Talon and Bailey laughing.
* * * * * *
A bath is exactly what I need right now. A hot bubble bath in a huge Jacuzzi with my husband, actually. I rest my tired head on his hard, sculpted chest as he runs the sponge over my exposed skin. I’m nearly asleep when I feel Dec’s lips brush the side of my face.
“Today was more than I ever could have expected. Thank you, Sunshine. Thank you for doing such a beautiful job on raising our daughter when I wasn’t around. Thank you for falling in love with me. Thank you for trusting me to put your lives in my hands and most of all, thank you for marrying me today.”
I turn around in his embrace, not caring that the water is splashing over the edges of the tub. I place my knees on either side of him and cup his face with both of my hands. “Declan, today was perfect, we are going to continue to raise an amazing daughter together as a team. Thank you for saving me from my lonely existence and falling in love with me. Thank you for believing in me and thank you for saying yes when I asked you to marry me.”
Declan laughs at me and then kisses me possessively, his hands wandering; trailing along the curves of my body. “I love you, my wife,” he says sweetly as he gazes into my eyes.
“And I love you, my husband,” I reply with bated breath, because this man has always made my insides flutter and my breath catch.
The End
Share Your Thoughts!
I so appreciate all of the Blog’s and readers that accepted ARC’s of Without Doubt and will write up a review. Us Indie Author’s rely on those reviews so much to help get our stories out there! If you loved Without Doubt I would be forever grateful if you would submit just a quick review of your thoughts on where you purchased your copy, but please be kind to others and don’t add spoilers!
THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!!
CJ Azevedo
For posting your review on Amazon: amazon/author/cjazevedo
For chit-chatting with CJ: https://www.facebook.com/pages/CJ-Azevedo-writer/348248455274917?ref=hl
Or you can email her here: [email protected]
Can You Keep A Secret?
Here’s a sneak peek at Author Dee Avila’s new
Adult Contemporary Series
The Pool Boy’s
Book One – Twin Reasoning
Twin Reasoning
CHAPTER ONE
SLOAN
“Bash, come on; we’re going to be late. You’re DD, tonight.” I reached over, grabbed my wallet and keys off the dresser, and shoved them into his pocket.
Sebastian growled. “Shit, Dude, I’m hurrying.”
“If you weren’t such a girl, having to primp for thirty damn minutes.”
“Slo, this ‘just got out of bed look’ doesn’t just happen! It takes time and effort. Something you know nothing about.”
Finally, Sebastian finished getting ready. He locked up our apartment as I headed out to his black ’69 Camaro. I slid onto the warm leather, buckling up as soon as my ass touched the seat. Because he was a Race Car Driver, my brother felt he had to drive fast everywhere he went.
I was not looking forward to tonight. We were meeting Madame Elleanor and Kyle, an old high school buddy of ours, at a small, local bar. My dipshit of a brother found us a job; well, two actually. Elleanor owned a pool cleaning service that was more like a front for an escort service. Sebastian begged me to go to this meeting and keep an open mind about joining their businesses.
I needed the money. I had bodybuilding competitions coming up and could use the money for registration. I began getting involved in the bodybuilding scene during my junior year of high school but, at twenty-three, this would be my first year to compete. I had packed on close to twenty-five pounds of muscle since graduating. It was hard work and took a lot of discipline, but was well worth it. Someday, I will be on the stage in Las Vegas competing for Mr. Olympia.
Sebastian squealed the tires as we rounded a corner. Pulling into the parking lot, I saw Kyle’s beat up old Dodge parked three spots in. Back at, Ashlane High, Kyle Ashton was a senior when we were freshman. Sebastian ran into him, again, a few months ago and they had been hanging out together ever since. Kyle bartended at Eric’s, the bar we just pulled up to. Even though the bar was in the heart of North Los Angeles, it was chill. I’d been here my fair share of times. There were a lot of regulars and TV’s to watch sports. The older jukebox still sounded good and wasn’t insanely loud, like at a club. It was the perfect spot to have this meeting and discuss our new adventure. Yeah, right! Ok, maybe adventure isn’t the right word, more like fornication.
Sebastian pulled me out of my mental conversation by flinging my door open. “Dude, Slo, get out of the damn car.”
Fuck! I didn’t want to do this. My brother better realize that he owes me. I stepped out of the car, straightened my button-down shirt and messed with the sleeves that I had rolled up to the elbow. “Fine. Let’s do this. But you, asshole, you owe me big!”
I followed him inside the dark bar, rounding a sharp corner and headed for the bar along the far wall. I quickly scanned the area, it was nearly dead. Two older guys occupied one booth and a young woman sat at the bar, alone, talking to the bartender. The place always smelled of smoke, even though you haven’t been able to smoke in restaurants or bars for years, and mildew. Sebastian marched ahead of me to the farthest, darkest, corner in the bar.
In the circular booth, Kyle sat next to a woman who couldn’t have been that much older than us. I took Elleanor in before we fully reached them. She was wearing a dark business suit and had her straw colored hair pulled back, neatly. She looked prim and proper, especially with the librarian glasses that sat on the tip of her nose as she read over some paperwork.
“Hey, guys!” Kyle announced. Miss Prim and Proper popped her head up. Elleanor took in every inch of Bash before shifting her eyes to me. Her thin lips twitched, but remained tightly sealed. Her left eyebrow quirked, drawing my attention to her ice blue eyes. If she didn’t look like such a bitch, she could be pretty.
“Ky, you didn’t mention they were twins.” Her high-pitched voice sounded like nails on a chalkboard to me. I couldn’t do this. This chick was irritating the shit out of me, already.
Kyle shrugged. “Didn’t think it mattered.”
Elleanor huffed before extending her hand out to us. “I’m Madame Elleanor.” I watched my brother transform, flashing a grin my way before taking Madame Elleanor’s hand and pressing a kiss to it. “I’m Sebastian.”
&
nbsp; “Sloan.” I wasn’t going to pretend I liked her.
“Alright, have a seat boys and we can discuss your future with Devine Services.”
As we sat down, the waitress brought over a margarita, two beers and a coke. Lifting one of the beers to my lips, I took a long pull from the bottle. Elleanor sipped her drink and then started talking, again. “I operate two businesses under one name. If I hire you, you will be required to work for both entities. Devine Pool Services and Devine Male Escorts. I don’t know how much Ky has told you about me, or my businesses, so I will explain how this works. That way there is no miscommunication.”
I didn’t know what she wanted from us at that moment, but continued to wait, looking at us expectantly. I finally nodded. “Got it.”
Clearing her throat, she handed us each a packet. “The pool business is legit and you will be cleaning pools. However, each house on your route has a female in need of a companion. Most of the time they are just looking for someone to talk to—lonely housewives, widowed younger woman, and occasionally they will request your presence at some function or another.”
“So, we have sex with the Desperate Housewives of Granada Hills? Awesome!” Bash belted out next me, relaxing into the back of the booth and taking in what he wanted to hear from our boss.