Deception (Absent Shadows Trilogy Book 3)

by S. M. Spencer

  Debs blushed even further, looking down at the ground and sort of shuffling her feet a little. Mladen released her hand and took a small step back. Then he turned to Ceylona.

  ‘Ceylona, if you would like to take Jackie and Zane out the back, Sebastian can bring the truck around and help you set up their kennels.’ Then he turned to me. ‘Lili, would you like to help them? I wouldn’t mind having a quiet talk to your aunt, before dinner.’

  ‘Oh, yes … of course. I’ll see you a bit later then, Debs?’ I asked, trying to keep the disappointment from my voice. I had thought the three of us could sit and talk.

  ‘Yes, dear. You run along with Ceylona, and I’ll see you at dinner.’

  As I turned, I could just see Ceylona disappearing around the side of the building, with the two dogs obediently walking at her side, not even pulling on their leashes. Sebastian had started the truck and was looking at me, asking if I wanted to jump in, but I just smiled and waved him on. When I turned back to say goodbye to Debs and Mladen they’d already gone up the steps and had vanished inside the building.

  I stood there by myself in the driveway, and for just a moment it was as if I was in a dream. Then I ran my fingers through my hair and shook my head and told myself to snap out of it. I turned, and walked off in the direction Ceylona had gone, but I couldn’t seem to shake the odd feeling that something was wrong. And for the first time since I’d been back in Australia, I wondered if bringing her here had been the right thing to do.

  ~ Chapter Eleven ~

  The sensation that something was wrong didn’t exactly disappear, but I came to the conclusion that I was simply feeling anxious. After all, my life was about to change dramatically—again. I was losing Ceylona more and more each day as she settled into her new world. And although I was excited that I’d get to be with Sam, I was dreading leaving here without Ceylona.

  But at least Debs being here made it a little easier. She kept me so busy that I didn’t have time to think about leaving Ceylona … not yet anyway. The weather was excellent so we were able to go for long walks every day, and even though it was technically winter, we even went for a swim one afternoon.

  We had our overnight trip to Perth, where Debs insisted I have several inches cut off my hair, my legs waxed, a manicure, and a facial. It was, in a word, torture. But Debs swore I looked better, and did her best to convince me it was all worth it. At least the shopping, to expand my meagre wardrobe, had been fun. I couldn’t remember when I’d last gone shopping for clothes for myself. Could it have been with Debs? If so, that would that have been four years ago.

  I also spoke to Sam every day. Hearing his voice gave me strength, and faith that everything would work out just fine. And although he admitted that he hadn’t taken the time to look at any houses yet, he promised that as soon as I arrived we could go look together. We agreed that I would stay with Debs and Ian at first. He claimed to be embarrassed about it, but to me it sounded like he was almost relieved.

  Ceylona was over the moon with Jackie and Zane, and spent as much time with them as she was allowed. And each evening after dinner Debs and I got the full rundown of the progress she’d made with her training. Debs was really good with her, patiently sitting while Ceylona explained in great detail everything she’d taught them that day. By the sounds of it, Ceylona had the same uncanny way of communicating with them that she’d had with Ted and Alice, although thinking about the way she always talked to Archie, I did wonder how much of it might be put down to childhood imagination.

  Debs and Mladen appeared to have developed a strong friendship, and on several occasions I found them talking alone together—either in the sitting room or out on the back terrace. I knew they often discussed Francis, and Mladen preferred to keep these conversations private; it was not something that he wanted discussed at the dinner table. Debs did fill me in on some of what she learned, the most important of which was that Mladen had agreed to send one of his teachers in search of Francis. Since Ben and Henry had decided to stay on to help with Mark, Mladen felt he could spare one of the teachers that had expressed a desire to take a break. He would leave within the week. Mladen was confident he would locate Francis, but couldn’t say how long it might take.

  Mark was growing rapidly, as all dhampirs do. He was already sitting up and communicating in his own baby way, and I knew he would soon be good company for Ceylona. Mind you, Ceylona had grown at incredible speed over the past month as well, and I could only assume her body was making up for lost time. I’d swear she’d grown at least an inch taller since we’d arrived at Mladen’s. She was as mature as a child who had been in school for quite some time, and perhaps due to the influence of her older brothers, her vocabulary seemed to have quadrupled.

  On the morning Debs and I were to leave, it was a sombre mood at the breakfast table.

  ‘I’ll write you a letter as soon as I arrive in Melbourne. When you get it, you are to sit down and write me a letter in return. Mladen will be able to mail it for you. Then, when I get your letter, I will write one back to you. And the letters can go back and forth like that. How does that sound?’

  ‘Okay, Mommy. I will tell you all about Jackie and Zane and what I’m learning. And if we go anywhere I can tell you about that too.’

  ‘That will be very nice, Ceylona. I’m so looking forward to getting regular letters.’

  I’d discussed this with Mladen before raising it with Ceylona. Mladen wasn’t particularly keen on technology, and although he did have a mobile phone, he hadn’t yet embraced the concept of the internet and emails. He was also very protective of what information went in and out of the school. He would allow the letters, but only so long as they were of a very personal nature. He would filter the letters going out and coming in. But that was fine with me. I simply wanted to keep in touch with my daughter, for as long as she was prepared to do so.

  ‘Will you come say goodbye to Jackie and Zane, Mommy?’ she asked in a hopeful tone.

  ‘Of course I will. I’m ready, if you are,’ I replied, taking her hand in mine.

  ‘Yes, ready, let’s go now,’ she said as she stood up and tugged on my hand.

  I excused us from the table, and let Ceylona lead the way out the back door to the kennels. It was a large area, enclosed with a fence so that while Ceylona was studying she wouldn’t need to worry about her dogs straying.

  As we approached, both dogs sat up and faced us, tails wagging so hard they sent the dirt flying in both directions. When she opened the gate, they walked up to her and licked her face and hands, tails going as fast as propellers.

  ‘Sit,’ she said to them, and they instantly sat next to her, facing me.

  I walked up and stroked their beautiful faces; first Jackie, then Zane.

  ‘You look after this little girl of mine, you hear?’ I ordered Zane.

  As I spoke he blinked, and turned to look at Ceylona, then back to me. I could have sworn he understood me perfectly.

  ‘Don’t worry, Mommy. They will always protect me.’

  ‘I’m sure they will, sweetheart. Just as you’ll protect them, and look after them every day.’

  ‘Of course I will, Mommy. They are my family now, just like you, and Grandma, and Raye, and Aunty Debs, and Ben and Henry.’

  As she said this, I felt a jab of pain. She hadn’t mentioned ‘Daddy’ in this family scenario. For all intents and purposes, I suppose she didn’t have a Daddy, or at least not one that she knew. The boys didn’t either, but it was different with them. They were living the only life they knew, and hadn’t seen ‘family’ like Ceylona had when we were at Mom’s house.

  I’d make this up to her somehow—this lack of a father in her life. I’d have to work on having her come over to stay with us, for a visit if nothing else. She needed to spend time with Sam, to have a chance to get to know him. Surely she’d be allowed to come for a visit; perhaps at Christmas. Sam and I would have a home by then.

  My spirits lifted at this thought, and I reached ov
er and stroked her hair. She turned to me, and gave me a smile that melted my heart. I sniffed back a tear and swallowed hard, then turned to Zane again, and rubbed the top of his head. He closed his eyes, and rested his head against my leg, and I would swear he was trying to comfort me.

  ~~***~~

  An hour later Debs and I stood in the foyer, saying goodbye to Ben and Henry, Mladen, Sebastian and a few of the other teachers who had come out to bid us farewell. Ceylona was beside me, holding my hand tightly. She suddenly looked so fragile and innocent—my little girl, who had only recently turned three but looked so much older. It was hard for me to believe I was actually going to leave her, but it was time to go.

  ‘I’ll go start the car, while you say goodbye,’ said Debs with a knowing look.

  ‘I’ll write you a letter as soon as I get home,’ I said to Ceylona, kneeling down to her level, and pushing her beautiful golden hair back from her face. I so wanted to say that I’d see her at Christmas, but I hadn’t cleared that with Mladen yet, and didn’t want to make promises I couldn’t keep.

  ‘I have something for you, Mommy. Wait here,’ she said, pulling free of my hand and racing back up the stairs toward her bedroom.

  In a moment she returned holding something behind her back. She stopped directly in front of me.

  ‘Ah-chee can go with you Mommy. You need him now. I have Jackie and Zane. You take Ah-chee with you,’ she said as she brought the stuffed dog out from behind her back.

  ‘Oh, Ceylona,’ I said, swallowing hard and trying desperately not to cry. The lump in my throat was hard to ignore, but I had to be strong for her—after all, my little girl was being strong for me. ‘Are you sure you want me to take him?’

  ‘Yes, Mommy, you take Ah-chee. He can be your doggy now,’ she replied, smiling sweetly as she handed him over to me.

  I took the stuffed dog in my left hand, then reached forward and pulled Ceylona to me tightly in a hug that would have to last for quite some time. But I knew that I would come back here with Sam for a visit, or that we’d have her come to us; she was never going to be far from my thoughts, and she would always be my little girl. I stroked her hair, and told her how much I loved her and then, somehow, I found the strength to let go.

  ~~***~~

  I’d known that leaving Ceylona would be difficult, and had dreaded this moment since the day at Coyote Point Beach. But the feeling of emptiness was worse than I’d ever imagined; I had to keep reminding myself to breathe.

  Debs must have sensed my need for silence, as unlike our drive earlier in the week, she didn’t say a word as we made our way toward Perth. I just stared out the window at the barren landscape. The ground was dry and dusty from what had been a long hot summer and autumn. Winter had not yet brought any rain, and there seemed to be nothing growing, nothing alive.

  I had to keep reminding myself that Ceylona no longer belonged in my world. I had to let her be what she was born to be, with those that she was destined to be with. She would make a difference. And for now, at least, she had her brothers, and Mladen. She would be safe, and happy.

  And I was going home to Sam. He wouldn’t be able to make me forget Ceylona, but he would help me heal; help me feel that there was a reason to go on living. I kept reminding myself of this as the car sped along the deserted stretch of road. While I was speeding away from Ceylona, I was speeding toward Sam. Everything would be fine.

  A familiar sound broke the silence and I jumped, startled. My phone had beeped; a text message. I pulled it out of my handbag and pressed the button and saw that it was from Sam. My immediate thought was just how wonderful he was—that he must have figured out that I’d have left for the airport by now. He would be sending me a message to cheer me up. That was what I hoped anyway. Then I read his message.

  ‘Lili, I’m sorry but I can’t meet you at the airport. Can you take a taxi? I’ll ring you tonight. Sam.’

  ~ Chapter Twelve ~

  I shivered as we stood at the crowded taxi stand outside Tullamarine’s domestic terminal. It was just after seven in the evening, and the queue was long with what appeared to be business people returning from interstate. The pilot had said it was twelve degrees when we landed, but the wind felt like it was blowing straight from the South Pole. I’d forgotten how bitterly cold Melbourne’s winter could be, and I wasn’t dressed for it.

  When we finally made it to the front of the queue, I swore at Sam under my breath, and heard Debs laugh as she said, ‘I agree. Bloody Sam, what could have been so important that he couldn’t pick us up?’

  ‘I’m sure it was unavoidable,’ I answered, making excuses for him even though I wasn’t entirely sure I believed it.

  ‘Yes, yes, I’m sure it was. It’s most unlike him to be anything other than chivalrous.’

  The taxi pulled up, and the driver jumped out and threw our bags in the back. Debs and I both jumped in and she spoke firmly to the driver saying, ‘Docklands, please.’

  As the car drove off, I remembered that I’d switched my phone off when I got on the plane. I pulled it out of my bag and turned it back on, hoping maybe there’d be a message, but there was nothing.

  ‘Now, Lili, you know it’s absolutely no problem for you to stay with me, for as long as you like. So don’t feel you have to take the first house you look at. You kids should take your time; look for something that you really like … something that feels like a home. It’s a shame Sam felt he had to give up that house of his. It was very comfortable, not to mention convenient. But I dare say something will come up. And I’ve told you, Sam can stay as often as he likes too. Just make yourself at home. With Ian back in Paris, the apartment will feel very empty, so I’m actually looking forward to you staying.’

  ‘Ian’s gone back to Paris?’

  ‘Yes. Oh, hadn’t I mentioned that? He was offered another research position, at the same hospital he went to a few years back. He was so flattered that he couldn’t refuse. But frankly, I’d seen everything there was to see in Paris the last time. I told him to go without me, and I’d stay and continue with my bridge groups and volunteer work. He left a few days before I came over to Perth. I thought I’d told you, but perhaps not.’

  ‘No, well, I don’t think you mentioned it. So, it really isn’t a problem then, me staying?’

  ‘Please, Lili. It is absolutely not a problem. Like I said, I’m looking forward to having you. Now, first thing tomorrow, I’m taking you shopping. You need a winter coat and some jumpers. You look like you’re half frozen. Driver, can you please turn the heater up a bit?’

  The traffic heading into the city was light, so it didn’t take long for us to get into town. As I walked through the front door of the apartment, memories came rushing back. Like the night I’d waited alone in the apartment, desperate to hear from Sam that all had gone well with the encounter with Zunios. And like the first time he’d come up to meet Debs, and forced himself to eat some cheese and crackers to be polite.

  I suddenly felt so exhausted. I was missing Ceylona terribly, and Sam wasn’t here to lift my spirits. My arms and legs felt heavy, and at the same time my head felt muddled and the room seemed to swirl.

  ‘Lili, are you alright? You look exhausted.’

  ‘Yeah, maybe I should try to sleep for a bit?’

  ‘Of course. It’s been a big day for you. But you’re probably starving too, so let me make you an egg on toast and a cup of tea, and then you should have an early night.’

  ‘No, really, thanks … I’m not hungry. I just want to sleep. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?’

  ‘Of course. Sleep well.’

  I had a quick shower that helped warm me through, then slipped into my pyjamas and sat on the edge of the big queen-sized bed. I looked at my phone, wondering if Sam might have called while I was in the shower, but there were no missed calls—no messages. I considered ringing him, but I was too tired to think straight, so instead I set the phone to mute and placed it on the bedside table, and crawled into bed. The sheets
were freezing at first, but the weight of the heavy doona was comforting, and it wasn’t long after my head hit the pillow that I felt myself drift off to sleep.

  ~~***~~

  When I woke, the room was still dark so I thought it must be early, but I rolled over to find the alarm clock showing seven fifteen. I’d slept over ten hours. I quickly checked my phone, but there’d been no calls. I jumped out of bed, threw on a pair of track pants, a sweatshirt and my runners and tiptoed into the kitchen.

  ‘Well, good morning,’ said Debs, looking up from the morning paper. ‘How did you sleep?’

  ‘Like a rock. I guess I needed it.’

  ‘Of course you did, dear. That was a big day yesterday … emotionally. So, what do you feel like doing today? My diary is clear for a few days, so I was hoping we could go shopping and get you some proper winter clothes.’

  ‘Sure, that sounds good. Oh, and you know those cameras … the ones where you take the photo and it pops straight out of the camera? Well, I want to get one of those for Ceylona. Mladen won’t let her have a computer so a digital is no good, but I’d like her to be able to send me photos.’

  ‘Ah, yes, I know the sort you mean. I haven’t seen anyone use one in years, but I think they still make them. That’s a great idea.’

  She just looked at me for a moment, and I knew what she was thinking. She would be wondering if Sam had phoned. But I didn’t mention that he hadn’t. I didn’t see any point in talking about something that would just make me more depressed.

  ‘Would you like a top up?’ I asked, as I pulled a cup out of the cupboard and poured myself a coffee.

  ‘No, I think I’ll float away if I have any more. There are some nice pastries over by the fridge, or if you’d prefer toast, there’s bread in the freezer.’

  ‘Yeah, okay, I’ll have toast,’ I said, opening the freezer to grab the solid loaf of bread. Toast with peanut butter; it was comfort food, and just what I needed.