All she did was shake her head. She wouldn’t talk to me.
I pulled her hands up to my lips. “How did you find me? Did my mother put you up to this?”
“Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving?” She’d traveled all this way to ask me that? Something else had to be wrong.
I put my head down, feeling terrible, but wondering why she was asking. I’d given her the letter. “I didn’t need to explain my reasons to anyone, Lacey, especially you. You made it clear that we couldn’t be together.”
“No! You don’t understand.”
I began pacing around the room. She was being so confusing. Had she come all this way to make me feel like I was the bad guy? “Lacey, tell me why you’re here. You see, I’m tryin’ real hard to move on. I moved here to get away.”
“Get away from what? Are you in trouble?”
“No! I didn’t do anything wrong. Stop actin’ like you don’t know.”
She came up behind me and put her hand on my back. “I really don’t know.”
I turned slowly realizing that she’d never gotten my letter. Lacey had no idea why I’d left. She didn’t know how I really felt about her. It pained me, having her touch me and care about me when the last thing I’d said to her was to go away. “Don’t, Lace.”
“Why? Why can’t I touch you? Do you hate me that much? Did you leave because you hated me?”
I kissed her hand again.. “I can’t hate you.”
“I don’t understand.” That seemed to make her more confused. She backed away from me.
I walked forward, unable to let space get between us. “What don’t you understand? I told you how I felt. I told you that you were different. I knew I shouldn’t have let myself feel that way. My mother always told us not to give a woman our heart. She said they’d just break it, but you were different. I couldn’t help myself. I had to know what it felt like to open myself up to you.” I paused before I said something that I’d regret out of feeling so frustrated. “Then you go and sleep with Shayne, like I meant nothin’ to you. Do you have any idea what that felt like to finally fall for someone and have that happen? I had to leave, Lacey. I couldn’t see you again, even if it was by chance. It hurts too much knowin’ you don’t want me that way.” I walked in the bathroom and said something that I really didn’t want. “You need to go.”
I could hear her running towards the door. Her hands slammed against it. “Joey, don’t shut me out. There’s something you need to know. I can’t tell you through the door.”
I’d never, in my entire life, gotten so emotional. My eyes were burning and I knew then that what I was feeling was real. I opened the door and stared into her sad eyes. “Are you here because someone’s hurt? Is it my mom? Tell me, Lacey.”
“I came because I love you,” she sobbed. “I came as soon as I found out you were gone. I know it was stupid, but I couldn’t tell you over the phone. I needed to see you. Now, after seeing you with that other woman, I know I wasted my time.”
Time froze for a second and then I had her in my arms. My lips were on hers and I wasn’t about to let her go, even if she fought me. Lacey loved me and all I wanted to do was be with her.
Our tongues began to mingle and her arms were wrapped around my neck. She was there with me and we loved each other. In that moment nothing else mattered.
It was like a dream having her in my arms again. Nothing was going to take her from me this time. I’d make sure of it.
Chapter 25
Lacey was in my arms, waiting for me to say something. “I thought if I took this job I could forget about you and the way you made me feel, but I was wrong. I can’t get you out of my head.”
“So you picked up other women?” Apparently, she was worried about other things.
I laughed and felt happy that she cared so much. It also felt great knowing that I hadn’t slept with anyone. Still, I needed to reassure her. I may have been coming home to sleep with my boss’s wife, but if I had an inkling that Lacey was on her way to be with me, it never would have happened. “That woman is my bosses wife. I don’t have a lot of stuff here yet, so I borrow theirs from time to time. She came to get their blender because they’re expectin’ company tomorrow night.”
“So, you weren’t hooking up?”
“Woman, you make me crazy! Why would I want to be with any other women, when all I want is you? Don’t you get it? I’m crazy for you, Lacey. I drink beer to forget you and pass out dreamin’ about you. You think I wanted to let myself feel this way? Damn it, I’ve gone my whole life without carin’ and the first time I open my heart, it gets torn to shit.”
Lacey started to cry and I felt bad for lying about Gia, but she’d come all this way to be with me and I couldn’t hurt her with the truth. Besides, I could have changed my mind and not slept with the woman anyway. Regardless, it never happened.
She shook her head and cried more. “I’m so sorry,” She grabbed my hands. “But I’m not leaving this time. I came all this way, not just to bring you home, but because hearing that you left crushed me. I don’t care about the past, or the head games that both of us were playing. This thing between us is real.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that. Did she really come all this way to get me to go home?
“Say something.”
I had to ignore her comment and take into consideration that she’d come to be with me and we were just wasting precious time by standing around. I picked her up in my arms and look into her eyes. “You flew here to be with me, Lacey. I need you naked, so we can fuck, because I’m tired of picturin’ it in my head. I need to have the real thing.”
I carried her crying ass to the bedroom and lay her down on the mattress. She sat up on the edge, staring at me with wet eyes. We said nothing as I grabbed the bottom fabric of her shirt and began lifting it up. Lacey put her arms above her head, making it easier for me.
I knelt down and looked directly into her eyes and I removed her shoes one at a time, and then her pants. Then I stood up and started removing my clothes, while watching her slide off her bra and then her underwear.
I wanted her so badly that my dick felt like it was on fire, but it wasn’t just about the sex. I needed to feel close to Lacey because I’d missed her more than I even realized. Now that I had her with me, I needed her in my arms.
I just needed her.
When I climbed on the bed, she slid into my arms. Our kisses were slow and full of emotion. Our tongues matched rhythms, just like they’d done every time we’d kissed before. Everything about her was so familiar to me, as if I’d memorized every detail and never realized it.
It wasn’t just the way her hair smelled, or how soft her skin was to touch. It was everything that she said, the way she moved, and the way I felt with her in my arms.
We didn’t need to talk to feel that connection. It was already there, guiding us to be together again. I entered her slowly, absorbing the way it felt as I glided in, inch by inch.
Our naked bodies moved together and it felt like the first time being with her all over again. Being with Lacey was so much more than sex. When I was with her I never wanted it to end. She was so beautiful and I knew she was in my arms because she wanted to be mine. I wasn’t going to have to share her with anyone else, and I sure as hell couldn’t imagine being with another woman. She was all the woman that I needed.
It was a first for me, but one I was sure was the right choice. I’d tried to live vicariously through other women and all it did was make me want her.
Our breathing increased as her first orgasm took control. Her body arched and I continued kissing her to heighten the moment.
Even feeling satiated, she didn’t stop there. Lacey wanted all that I had to offer and I was going to give my all, until I passed out from exhaustion or died a happy man.
The hours started to pass and we’d been making love since Lacey had arrived, only stopping for bathroom breaks and water. Even though our movements were exactly as I’d remembered,
everything felt new. This woman did things to me that no other could.
I’d been right to run away in some aspects, because our connection as intense that I knew I’d never be the person I was before.
Lacey could never understand the impact that she had over my actions. She’d restored a part of me that had been locked away.
My heart.
She leaned over and pinched my nipples between her nails. I reacted, moving around as the pain rushed through my limbs. The pain may have stunned me, but it also had given me a jolt of need. I started fucking her harder, becoming more turned on as she cried out my name. She was so wet that each time I thrusted inside of her it made loud slapping sounds. Her juices were sticking to my skin, leaving me more turned on and giving me the fuel to keep going at it.
I reached down, wet my thumb, and then began rubbing her clit with pressure. “I thought about this pussy every damn night. Show me again, Lace. Show me how it puckers up for me.”
I looked down, waiting for her pussy to start to spasm around my cock. She knew what I was waiting for and even with her eyes closed, I could tell she fighting the urge to give it to me. She wanted me to keep pleasing her and I didn’t intend on stopping until she couldn’t move any longer.
A warm gush oozed out of her as she screamed out into the dark room. As her body climaxed, I kept rubbing her swollen clit, making sure I got every ounce of pent up sexual desire out of her. She bucked more against my stiff cock, and if it wasn’t for me concentrating so hard on making her cum, I would have blown my load already.
Seeing as she was sexually exhausted, I started my pace to get the job done. The louder we splashed together, the harder I hit it, using the smacking sounds to bring myself to the finish line.
Tears rolled down her eyes and I knew they weren’t because she was sad. I felt the same way she did; so utterly taken back that we were together again that our emotions couldn’t be contained.
Lacey’s shaking legs wrapped around me as I continued pumping myself inside of her. She knew I was close and I’d held off long enough. The massive explosion had begun and I lost all senses in my body. It tightened up and I felt dizzy as it kept pumping. Finally, as it started to soften, I was able to regain movement.
Lacey’s smile was the first thing I noticed. I’d been thinking of that smile for so long that it almost didn’t feel real. I knew she was there with me, but it was surreal at the same time.
She’d traveled on a plane to another country to hunt me down and profess her feelings for me, even when she had no idea how I would react. Knowing that a woman, that I care so deeply for, had done that for me was the more reassuring feeling. For someone that swore on a bible that I’d never fall in love, I was digging an early grave, because it had happened and there was nothing that could change my mind.
Lacey started yawning and I knew she was exhausted from her long journey to get to me. Seeing that we were both satisfied, I held her close in my arms and kissed the top of her head, as she traced the skin on my chest. My heart was still racing, as if I was seeing her in the alley for the first time.
Then she started crying again and this time it was more like sobbing. “What’s wrong, Lace?”
“I almost lost you,” she cried out. “I’m just so happy to be here with you, Joey. I’m sorry for staying away and fighting what was really happening between us. I should have trusted you, listened to you more.”
I wiped her tears away with both of my thumbs. “Stop cryin’. It’ ain’t your fault. I could have been clearer, but I wasn’t sure how to be. It ain’t like I’ve been in this situation before.”
Lacey nodded. “I know.”
I kissed her softly, tasting the tears that had traveled down her face. When I pulled away, we were staring into each other’s eyes again. “I thought you were usin’ me to forget Shayne. I didn’t want to admit my feelin’s to someone that didn’t want me back. Leavin’ was easier.”
“No,” She shook her head. “It wasn’t easier. I thought you didn’t want to see me anymore. I stayed away because I was afraid that it was easy for you to forget me. It hurt me so much. I thought that sleeping with Shayne sent you over the edge and you decided that you didn’t want me anymore, in any way.”
I rubbed her cheek and smiled. “It was the opposite. When you told me that you slept with him, I felt like I couldn’t breathe. My damn stomach hurt so much and I wanted to hurt him so bad. That was so hard for me, Lace, hearin’ you say that you gave yourself to another man; a man you loved.”
“I know you won’t understand this, but I slept with him because I wanted the closure. I did it because I knew that there was something happening with us. Sleeping with Shayne had nothing to do with love. It was about saying goodbye to something that I’d held onto for too long.” It still didn’t help hearing that she’d given herself to Shayne again. I hadn’t made it clear back then, but she belonged to me. I didn’t want to share her with anyone, especially him.
I wasn’t too convinced that fucking someone goodbye was the way to end things. “Are goodbye fucks somethin’ that normal couples do?”
She shrugged. “It was a mistake.”
I grabbed a towel and put it between her legs, to clean off the mess we’d made. It satisfied me to no end that she’d let me fuck her without protection. I’d never done that, never having felt enough for my partner to be that intimate. “You’re here now.”
She reached up and touched my lips with her fingers. I kissed them while keeping my eyes on hers. “I’m so sorry I hurt you. If I would have known how you really felt, I never would have touched him again. I swear I wouldn’t.”
“Lacey, Shayne still wants you, that’s no secret. If you gave him another chance…”
She pressed her hand over my mouth to prevent me from continuing. “Shh, it’s never going to happen.”
We got more comfortable, laying on our sides and facing each other. “I’m goin’ to fuck up at some point, because I’ve got no idea how to be in a relationship.”
“You’re doing great.” She was starting to slur her words as she fell asleep.
I didn’t know if she could even hear me as her breathing had already changed like she was sleeping.
“I’m so in love with you,” I whispered against her ear.
Chapter 26
It took me a long time to fall asleep. Just having her there in my arms still didn’t feel like it was really happening. Perhaps the newness of committing myself was getting to me. I wanted to make her happy, so that I could wake up to her every day. It was hard figuring out how to not mess things up.
I kept her tight in my arms, smelling her hair as I played with it between my fingers. I wondered what she’d had to do to find me and knew she must have gone to my mother. That also meant that she’d known mine and Shayne’s Lacey was one in the same. Knowing she was in my bed led me to believe that she hadn’t said anything harsh to her. I think my mother was probably just happy that I’d finally stopped being a selfish prick about women. She’d always warned me about getting my heart broken, but as I got older she’d wanted the best for me.
I think I was happy for so long because I didn’t know what I was missing. My assumptions of love being some form of punishment that always ended badly. I never understood that when you fall, nothing else matters but being with that person for as long as you can. I certainly never saw myself wanting one woman, but Lacey had changed that opinion. She’d made me see that the right person could make all the difference.
Then I thought about Gia, and how I’d almost slept with her. My stomach knotted up imagining getting myself fired because of something so stupid. I was desperate to forget about my feelings for Lacey, even if it would have been temporary. Her being in my arms showed me how much harder it would have been to be intimate with someone else. No matter how attractive they were, they’d never be her. They’d never smell like her, or touch me the way she did.
When I finally fell asleep, after nearly an hour of deep thought, I
knew I wasn’t ever going to let Lacey go. No matter what I had to change, she was worth it.
I woke up before Lacey and played with her hair. She opened her eyes and smiled back at me.
I kissed her on the cheek. “How long can you stay?”
She sat up on her elbow and looked over at me. I loved seeing her with bed head and reminding myself how it had gotten so messed up.
“I didn’t think that far ahead,” She admitted.
“Well, now that you’re here, how long can you stay with me?” I wanted an immediate answer, because thinking about her leaving was already making me crazy. I knew I couldn’t expect her to never go home, but I wanted her to stay for as long as possible.
“Not long. My parents will flip when they find out that I ditched school to leave the country.” I was shocked that she hadn’t told them. Obviously, she’d come to find me spur of the moment.
“Lace, what if you stayed here with me? We could travel on my off days and not worry about anyone tryin’ to come between us.” She was an adult. Surely, she’d want to see the country before going home.
“I came here to get you to come home. Everyone misses you. We can be together now.”
The smile on my face faded. She wanted to be with me, but only if I came home with her.
“It’s not that simple. This job wasn’t just about me runnin’ away. Sure, if I would have known that you’d be with me, I wouldn’t have accepted the offer, but the truth is, I applied for this position last year. When a spot opened, I knew it was an opportunity of a lifetime. Walkin’ away from this could end my career. Do you know how many chefs get this kind of break?”
Lacey immediately started to cry. I don’t know what she expected from me, but I couldn’t just hop on a plane and give up something I’d worked so hard for. “I don’t understand. You said you wanted to be with me.”
Restore Me (Book 2.5 Kin Series) Page 16