Requested Surrender

by Riley Murphy

  I need you guys.

  Four simple words that had the potential to be life altering if she let her guilt and fear rule her and told them the truth. Of course this morning, waking up, everything looked different so that truth was going to remain buried. This left her scrambling for a different topic to discuss. Commissioner Gordon from Gotham had nothing on her girls. She was going to have to be smart, stick to something true and plausible.

  “He’s asked me to do the backside glide.”

  When Colin only shrugged and beat one of the throw pillows to her left, Lacy’s heart sank. Clearly her friend wasn’t impressed or outraged. Time to dial it up a little. “He wants me to beg him for it.”

  “Yeah, like I haven’t heard that one before.” Colin finally settled and then turned to her with a frown. “This isn’t why you had me bug Ethan to leave early this morning so I could be here for you. Spit it out.”

  Dammit. Colin was never one to mince her words or give up when she knew someone was lying. Two things that had Lacy in the hot-seat right now. But before she could introduce another topic, Colin opened the door to one for her.

  “And what gives with you, by the way. You look older or something. Did you change your hair? Wait. Oh. My. Frigging. God! You’re in love.”

  Lacy wasn’t sure about that. Lust? Big yes to that, but actual love? “I’m not sure. That’s why I needed to speak to you guys.”

  “Huh.” She crossed her arms on top of her belly and stared. Hard, until she asked, “Why?”

  Lacy made a sound like she was completely insulted. She was, actually, but getting Colin to believe her was the more pressing issue currently facing her, so she pushed forward to work that angle. “I’m no expert and being that you are, I thought I could use your advice.”

  “Huh.”

  “Quit saying that.”

  “I can’t help it. You rarely look like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders. That’s usually my job.” She speculatively eyed her. “If I didn’t miss my guess I’d think another one of your famous catastrophes was about to happen.”

  And this was the price a woman paid when she had close friends. Sometimes they were so close they read what was in your heart, no matter how hard she tried to hide it.

  “Yes. I think one is about to happen despite how well David and I are getting along. We are getting along but I’m not happy about one thing and it could be a problem.”

  Colin yawned, speaking through it, “You got me out me here early for one thing? It better be good.”

  This was her last chance to throw Colin off the scent of her true crime. She had to do it. She wasn’t taking any chances. “He doesn’t want me to go places by myself.”

  “So?”

  “Don’t you think that’s a little ridiculous? I can’t imagine Ethan forbidding you from walking to the store.”

  Her friend deadpanned. “Have you met my husband?”

  Lacy waved that comment off. “He’s being ridiculous.”

  “Who, David?”

  Lacy sighed, even as she wondered if pregnancy killed brain cells. “No, I’m complaining about your husband. Of course I’m talking about David. He’s got a whole pile of rules and theories.”

  “Can’t imagine it. The guy barely talks.”

  Lacy fell back against the couch and snorted. “There you are mistaken, my friend. He never shuts up.”

  “Who, Ted?”

  Jo sailed into the room and before Lacy could answer her, Colin did. “No, David. Apparently there’s a side to him we haven’t met yet.”

  “Not surprising.” Jo slid into the seat next to Lacy and knocked her shoulder against Lacy’s arm. “They’re all opinionated. You should do what I do.”

  Lacy didn’t want to ask, but she had to. “And that would be?”

  “I say what I want in my head and then parrot something he wants to hear after it.”

  Lacy turned wide eyes on her. “That’s a cop-out.”

  “Guilty.” Colin raised her hand.

  She looked from Jo to Colin and back again, when Jo shrugged. “She got that from me, and put your hand down for fuck’s sake. You look like a sixth grader sucking up to the teacher.”

  While Colin stuck her tongue out at Jo, Lacy continued to gripe. “You guys know that won’t work with me. I can’t help myself. David has a way of looking at me that—it compels me to say what’s on my mind.”

  “Don’t say that word.”

  This was their thing. Word issues. It started in college and still went on. And on. And on.

  Lacy tilted her head, waiting for Colin to explain why, when Jo piped up. “The Exorcist. Ever since we made her watch it she can’t bear hearing the word ‘compel’ without thinking about the movie.”

  “Jo.” Colin spoke through clenched teeth.

  “Am I right? And why don’t you tell Lace what you did to the movie I brought over to your place last week.”

  “It was Rosemary’s Baby.” Colin gestured at her distended stomach with both hands. “I’m nearly eight months pregnant and that’s the flick you want me chomping on popcorn watching?”

  “You owe me twenty-five dollars and seventy-five cents.” Jo turned to Lacy and scowled. “She cut it up and shoved it down the garbage disposal.”

  Lacy would have loved for them to continue sharing pieces of their little melodrama, but since they’d been talking about her and David they’d need to wait a few. “Hello? We were talking about my problems, remember?”

  Jo crossed her arms and said, “Don’t look at me. I just got here. I know we’re not talking about Colin’s problems because no one is crying, and there’s no free flowing booze, so we aren’t talking about mine. Where is the alcohol around this place anyway?”

  “You’re asking me?” Colin put a hand to her stomach and frowned. “You know I can’t drink when I’m carrying Nugget.”

  “Nugget?” Lacy shot a look at Jo because they’d both repeated that at the same time and then she eyed Colin. “You named the baby Nugget?”

  “Of course not. It’s a nickname for now. What? I like it.” She rubbed her belly and sniffed. “He’s our little piece of gold.”

  “I’m going to puke.”

  “Jo, be nice.” Lacy patted her hand and added, “I think it’s cute.”

  “Yeah, for a prospector’s mine-dwelling, troglodyte maybe.”

  Colin’s chin lifted a notch. “Never mind her, Lace. Jo is being a real bear today because Ted has laid down another law and she’s not happy about it.”

  “The alcohol? Come on, I know there has to be some around here somewhere. You and E spent a lot of time at this boathouse when the winery was being revamped. Don’t worry. I know how you like beer, so you got any vodka?”

  “The hard stuff, Jo? It’s not even two o’clock in the afternoon.”

  Lacy was in hell. She had to be. Neither one of her friends was taking her made-up problem seriously, but then why would they? Good old Lace was the one who never had any problems she cared to share—made-up or otherwise…before.

  “Why aren’t you talking?”

  Lacy looked at Jo and didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t freaking shrug, lord knew she wanted to, but now that she was trying to break the habit, the best she could muster was a half-assed gesture with her hands.

  “What’s with that? You look like a priest addressing his congregation before he says mass. Are you okay?”

  Colin gave Jo the stink-eye. “Be nice! Lace, never mind her. Tell us about David and Joe.”

  “Here we go. I told you to be careful. He found out, didn’t he?”

  “She told him.” Lacy looked at Jo, but indicated to Colin.

  “I most certainly did not.”

  Lacy snapped her head around and when she saw how serene Colin was, she realized that technically her friend was correct. “Oh, right. You told Ethan and he told David.”

  “Fucking women can’t be trusted.” Jo stood. “Where’s the vodka?”

  “Did
you tell her all of it? That’s why I told Ethan.”

  Lacy glared at Colin and then turned to Jo. “I may have neglected to tell you a few things.”

  “I’m listening.”

  Jo had a way of looking pissed off even when she wasn’t. It was kind of intimidating. “All right. You knew that Joe and I had a little bit of fling. We didn’t sleep together. Almost,” she emphasized, narrowing a look at Colin before she got up and paced in front of the huge bank of windows. “This ‘almost’ relationship left us in a really weird place when he started the remodel on my house. I couldn’t say no. Not totally anyway. Instead I just said yes when he suggested changing certain job materials.”

  “Let me guess. But before I do, could you point me in the direction of something fermented? Yeah, and no judging me there, Mom, how soon you forget it was me holding back your hair when you—”

  “Under the kitchen sink. Pour Lace a drink, too. I’ll take water.”

  Jo saluted them before she headed to the kitchen. Colin shook her head and then turned her full attention back at Lacy. “You’re going to have to be specific with the details. In my condition, I can’t be expected to translate so Jo will understand.”

  “Why the hell not? And since when is pregnancy a condition? It’s a natural part of life, for fuck’s sake. I don’t know about you North American women—”

  “You are one.” Colin called over her shoulder while Jo poured the drinks.

  “In birth, but not in spirit. When I have a kid, I’m not going to be bitching, ‘Oh, I have a contraction, I have to race to the hospital and lie in bed for fourteen hours laboring’.”

  “Here it comes.” Lacy heard Colin mutter as Jo went on.

  “Did you know that a native American Indian woman often delivered her child squatting up against a tree trunk?”

  “You forgot the part about how she rode the range all day first with the twinges. I love the twinges. They’re my favorite part of your argument.”

  Seeing Colin cup her hand around her mouth to call that out was classic. And as ludicrous as this conversation was, it was heartening. Normal. At least to her and she felt a whole lot better until Jo returned, holding out a half-filled tumbler. But before she let go of it she looked Lacy right in the eyes and said, “Sure. I left out the part because it was common for a woman to shit her—”

  “Jo!”

  “It’s a raw experience, but a natural bodily function. I’m only saying that there’s no need to think of pregnancy as a condition. Millions upon millions of women have had kids. Tons before hospitals were even available.”

  Colin dropped her head and swept her arm in front of her as if giving the go ahead signal. “Tell her. I know you’re dying to. God only knows I could recite the words if you asked me.”

  Lacy waited while Jo took a long pull of her drink. When her friend was done she did a little shake and sighed. “I needed that.” Then she sat down and nodded. “It’s all about gravity.” When Colin snorted, Jo went on the defensive. “I don’t know why you discount this. It makes perfect sense. You have something in you that’s coming out of you one way and instead of directing the object out that way using gravity, you lie on your back and push it out sideways? It’s fucking asinine.”

  “Nugget is not an object or an it. That aside, I already told you I’d give your way a try. I’ll walk and stay upright for as long as I can. I promise.”

  Lacy shook her head. “Am I the only one who thinks it’s odd that Jo should have an opinion about childbirth? You know, since she’s never done it.”

  “Hey now, I did the research. I even went directly to the source.”

  “She crashed a Mommy And Me gathering at the park.” Colin sighed. “I’ve never seen women with small children scatter so fast.”

  Jo ignored Colin altogether and looked right at Lacy. “I’ve been told by several women what it’s like to have a kid. You want to know what they say it feels like?”

  Lacy wanted to say not particularly, but she didn’t want to rain on Jo’s parade. Maybe this was information Colin could use. “Sure.” The alcohol burned going down her throat but she didn’t care. This was distraction. Exactly what she needed from the contents of the letter that was burning her, like the alcohol, only it wasn’t her throat that ached. It was her heart. She never should have read it. Never.

  “Okay, bring your hand up and take hold of you lower lip. You got it? Yeah, like that.” When Lacy stayed like that, Jo dipped to look from a lower perspective asking, “Got a good grip?”

  Lacy nodded.

  “Great, now pull it out. A little more. Perfect.” She straightened and then beamed, “Now pull it over your head.”

  Lacy let go of her lip so fast she imagined it slapped her teeth. What a horrible thing to say when Colin would be delivering in less than a month.

  There was an awkward silence that followed. Then Colin looked at Jo and mouthed the word ‘wow’, before she pointed in Jo’s direction but looked up at Lacy, “And she wanted to go to prenatal classes with me. Could you imagine?”

  “Absolutely not.”

  Jo leaned back and stretched her legs out on the coffee table. “Look, I’m doing you a favor. Expect the worst and if you get better than that you’ll be happy.” She was about to take another sip of her drink and paused mid-way. “Oh, and when you get to the hospital leave your modesty at the front door, because it ain’t about you anymore. It’ll be all about Nugget.”

  “Yeah, I think I’ve heard enough about pregnant me for today.”

  “Hallelujah. That was the plan.” Jo clinked her glass against Lacy’s. “If you don’t nip these pregnancy conversations in the butt all they do is gnaw on you until you can’t take it anymore.”

  “Very funny. I’m not like that.”

  Jo rolled her eyes and Lacy smiled. Because Colin was like that and it was so like Jo to call her on it.

  “Enough said. Now.” Jo turned to Lacy and pointblank asked, “I want to know what you meant by folding on job materials with the hunky contractor.”

  “Simple. Joe agreed to do the job at a discount, figuring that he’d get a little booty while he was there. Only Lacy met David and any potential booty calls were disconnected. Leaving the contractor high and dry, so he started cutting costs with certain materials to make up for the loss.”

  Both Lacy and Jo turned to look at Colin at the same time, but it was Jo who said, “And you thought you couldn’t translate.” She shifted to address Lacy and sighed. “Well, at least you got the work done at discount.”

  “I hate my place.”

  Jo cradled her drink on her lap and swore, “Fuck him. Do I need to pay him a visit to make it right?”

  “No, I’ll live with it until I can get it fixed. Like I said, it was awkward, but once I met David there was no way I could ever hook up with Joe. I was managing with him and David just fine for a while. I figured once I got back from my trip Joe would be done and gone.”

  “After he ripped you off.”

  “I would rather have lived with that then having to deal with David’s frustration.”

  “I’m sorry, Lace.” Colin reached out and patted her hand.

  “Frustration?” Jo chuckled. “Is that what you call it? I’d say the guy was pissed.”

  “Yeah, he was.” She wasn’t going to sugar coat this to her girls, they could take it. “He locked me in a chastity belt and then left with the keys.”

  “Chastity belt? Do I have great timing or what?”

  Lacy couldn’t help smiling when she saw Alexis come through the front door and close it. She waved her in. “Hiya.”

  “The guys told me you were here.” Alex called coming forward. “I hope you don’t mind?”

  Jo held up her glass. “No. Of course not. We’re just bitching about them.”

  “Beautiful. What did I miss?”

  Alex leaned over the back of the couch and gave Colin a hug. “I see you finally popped. Now you look pregnant instead of full from a big meal.”


  “I’ll tell you what you missed.” Jo offered, “You missed a riveting conversation about birth. If you’d like me to repeat—”

  “No!” Both Lacy and Colin said at the same time.

  Alex straightened up and grinned. “It was that good, was it? That’s okay. I’d rather hear about the chastity belt.”

  Lacy got Alex a drink as she told her the story about the belt. When she was done, Alex grinned. “What I want to know is how you got out of it?”

  “I made a choice. It was easy.”

  Colin looked at her in that speculative way again and said, “Nothing’s that easy with guys like them. Are you sure there isn’t something worrying you?”

  Before Lacy could deny this for a second time, Jo said, “Google it.”

  Yeah right. Like she’d do that. “That’s the advice you’re going to give me?”

  “I don’t even know what your problem is.”

  She glared at Jo and was about to take a seat again when Colin shook her head.

  “I thought I explained it. Did I forget something? Let see. I told you that hunky Joe felt ripped off with getting no booty calls, so he started ripping Lacy off by cutting materials, didn’t I?

  “Sort of.” Jo’s eyes shifted to Lacy and narrowed. There was a reason you didn’t give Jo this kind of ammunition. She had a tendency to use it.

  Lacy wanted to die. Colin wasn’t going there. Not with Jo and Alex. She tried to catch her eye, but Colin was on a roll. “You know Lace. She wasn’t going to upset the apple cart. She put up with the changes he made until one day she couldn’t take it. She got mad at him and insisted he clean the awful paint color off the wall because she wouldn’t accept it.”

  “It was glue off the floors.”

  “Yeah.” Colin swatted Lacy’s correction aside and continued, “Whatever. It doesn’t matter what it was. The end result was the same. Hunky Joe is a sub and Lace used that knowledge to turn things around to her advantage. A little late, mind you, but better that than never, I say.”

  “You.” Jo sounded amused. “You went domme on him?”