by Jillian Hart
A soft trill of laughter rang out from the kitchen, and he caught sight of Peg, efficient and chattering away, carried a stack of big soup bowls and plates to the table, just in his sight. Her attention was on her husband, who she pretended to be off-put by his insistence on spoiling his appetite for supper on cookies, of all things, and making everyone in the kitchen laugh. The bright sound tugged up the corners of his mouth and eased the pain from that hard grief balled up in his chest even more.
"What do you want to do together, now that I'm done working for Stan as a furniture maker?" He kept his voice humorous and quiet so it wouldn't carry and disturb Peg juggling silverware and cups, far too many to be carrying without danger of dropping them. A spoon slipped and clunked to a rest on the edge of the table before bouncing a little farther, sailing over the edge and thudding onto the floor. She rolled her eyes, laughing.
"You do too much, Ma!" Nola laughingly protested. "What ever can we do to stop you?"
"I've got horse hobbles at home, so I'm no help," Stan called out around a mouthful of cookie while standing in front of the open cookie jar.
"Here, don't do that!" Saydee's loving tone belled with luster and laughter from the kitchen. "Thank goodness I wrestled the mixing bowl away from her. Nola, yes, thanks, please get this baking sheet in the oven. Aunt Peg, what are you doing now?"
"I'm rescuing the spoon from the floor, dear. My, what a tidy, clean house you keep. This is a spotless floor."
Winn knelt down beside his boy, sitting quietly in the chair taking it all in. "What do you think, kid?"
"Umm." He pressed his mouth together, thinking as his thoughtful gaze zipped to stairs and rising up into the second story, where two generous rooms were set aside for him, one a warm bedroom behind the chimney and a big sunny playroom perfect for winter. He gave a definite nod. "I'd like to go do something real important."
"What's that?"
"Set table. Will you come with me?"
He took his son's hand, full of more pride in the good boy than he could say or feel comfortable showing. "Good choice, boy, and yep, I'll come help you. Let's see if we can make things easier for those nice women, huh?"
"That's the idea." He grinned and hopped to his feet, standing as tall as his little boy frame would allow, with shoulders straight and set. "I learned that from you, Pa, from you, and I ain't ever gonna forget you."
The emotion hovered in the air between them, and there was no way to fix what had broken in their lives or what hurt between them, except to make the few moments to come as bright as possible.
He took Jack's hand. "Come on, let's go together."
Pete followed them, tail, wagging.
"What do you think of oyster crackers, Winn?" Peg asked the moment he stepped foot into the room. She looked up from setting a bowl of crackers along side one of the place settings.
"I think they're pretty tasty."
"Good, I'll give you extra."
"That is awfully kind of you." He could see each person had their own bowl, not to mention the biscuits that were just now to come out of the oven. Nola was watching the time and announced it to Saydee, whom he could spot across the length of the counter keeping turned away from him as if unaware he'd walked in. But he could tell by the rosy blush of pleasure on her face and the knowing smile upon her pearl-pink lips that she knew. His chest warmed, right along with every inch of him. Every inch. He gulped in a bite of air, trying to will down his hot kick of desire for her.
"Jack, let's get you sitting down. Stan is dishing up the bowls in the kitchen right now. I put him to work. A man has got to earn his food around here, there's no slacking." Sunny humor brightened her eyes, making her voice light as air. "You don't need to worry, Winn, thanks for all you did today to make my husband happy."
"I did what any man would, Peg, that's all." He shook his head, hoping to clear out the intense need for her like cobwebs blocking the working cogs of his brain, but to no avail. Nothing smart or witty came to mind. "I enjoyed working alongside your Stan very much. He clearly as extremely fine judgement in having you as a wife."
"Sit down, and keep talking sweet to me and I'll like you even more." Peg glanced pointedly at Saydee, opening the oven door for her cousin, and nodded her approval. "You'll do, Winn McMurphy, you'll do just fine."
It was a good feeling as he got Jack settled down in his chair and then ambled over to help Saydee bring steaming, food-filled serving bowls to the table. Helping her felt like the right thing to do, to make her grin wider and blush harder when he came near.
33
The meal passed in the slow, glimmering way of happiness when the company was good and treasured and the conversation fun, interesting and heartfelt. He'd consumed a stomach-filling, rib-sticking two big bowls of beef stew so rich, flavorful, and tasty it melted in his mouth with barely needing to chew. The potato cubes and carrot coins were sweet and flavored, falling apart just right in the gravy-like broth. And the onions were small squares of sweet soft bliss. He'd never eaten quite like this before, his late wife hadn't been a good cook and before she could learn more had passed away, sadly, after childbirth. His heart, never having been quite able to recover from the loss of who had been his only family, the only family member who'd ever attempted to hold on, even if both of them hadn't really known what they were doing.
Then again, she'd had a heart like his too, and they'd had that shared understanding. But this, this was different, what he felt for Saydee, and no matter what he wanted, he would never be able to find out if he had what it took at heart to hook, land and keep a wife as full of warmth, open heart and joyful life as his Saydee. But she'd changed his life and he would never be quite able to accept having to leave her before their love had a chance to blossom. The banter of family had accented the meal, bright as lamplight and as welcome as home should be.
During the course of the meal, he'd learned that Stan had proposed to his Peg at the most inappropriate time, since she'd bumped into him going into the jewelry shop to purchase her mother's birthday present and in his attempt to hide the ring he'd picked up and was still considering, he whipped around to avoid her seeing his face hoping she might not recognize his coat from behind and bumped into the salesman who fell over, spilled coffee on the luxury carpet and the ring fell in the puddle right at her rather coffee-spotted shoes. Her skirt hem was terribly affected. That had rather ruined the surprise, and he'd simply fixed the debacle by going down on bended in knee in the puddle of rather hot coffee, scooping up the ring he hadn't yet decided on, and asked for his beautiful Peg's hand in matrimony. With a start like that, Peg quipped, how could she have anything but low expectations?
The story stuck with him after the meal was done, as did their loving warmth and delight in telling Jack they would always be family now and so they would have to get to know him and wanted to know, especially Stan, if he was interesting in coming over to visit when Saydee got a chance to bring over for both lunch and supper so he could take a look at Stan's workshop out back and then a quick trip into his store in town, where they would grab apple pie, or cherry pie which was the very best, at the next door diner and then contemplate the big choices of wooden toys he both ordered from back East and Europe and made himself with great love and skill. This was exciting news to learn Jack could have wooden horses and cowboys, sherifs and an entire town full of shops and wooden people, even oxen drawing wooden wagons, not just horses, like he was used to. Then, there were the trains and their accessories. What fun was that going to be!
Stan told Winn not to worry over his son during the course of his long trip away. As everyone was taking their dessert plates into the parlor to sit where it was warmest and relax while Stan planned to read aloud for their evening's entertainment, Winn stayed behind and as quiet as a whisper slipped out of sight into the kitchen and filled the dish basin with hot water from the stove's reservoir.
While the faint rise and fall of voices filled the air and seemed to chase away the shadows and
loneliness around him, he kept an ear to the conversation as Jack cheered that Stan would be reading, stating that this was now was his very favorite thing to listen to the reading, and charmed everyone, earning their high regard. Their caring words and feelings changed the air as Winn held his hurting heart hard and firm, adding water to the steaming dish pan. He stiffened when he heard Saydee's quiet step tap into the kitchen, as cute as could be. Her long golden hair still crowned her head, but a good portion of it had tumbled down to wildly and sweetly cascade around her face in soft, gossamer curls.
"I see you in here. You can't hide from me, don't think I don't know what you're doing." She swiped loose curls away from her pixie face with the curve of her fingertip swiping upward. "Not many men would think to stay behind and clean up. You're missing both dessert and story time."
"Well, both are tempting and not to be missed, which is why you should be in there, but I sure appreciated the fine meal and there's little more I can do for the woman I feel strongly about, and the fact that I don't want to leave my son. I owe you more than I can ever repay you for your agreeing to raise him." He reached for the bar of lye soap. "My life savings just doesn't seem like enough."
"It's too much, and I plan on saving it in the bank just like I should, and don't think I'm going to spend a penny of Jack's money. It's for when he's older and should he decide to go to college or to buy a house when he gets married, then he has the money for it. That's what I intend to do. Caring for him will be my privilege. I was not fortunate enough to get to be a ma, so I feel as if this is an opportunity I need to do the right way. Only love is good enough for a boy losing his father, such a good boy. Such a truly good father."
"You make me sound far better than I really am."
"I'm telling the truth as I see it."
"There's something wrong with your vision then, but I sure do appreciate it, more than you know." He gripped the paring knife's handle as he shaved slivers of soap into the steaming water and stopped to watch them melt. "It's not often I find a real quality lady who holds such a good opinion of me, and to think of the way I've treated you, and I mean it as compliment because you're really something, Saydee, and also as a reassurance I've never been so forward with a woman in my entire life, never ever anything but a gentleman. Just so you know."
"I suspected that about you." Her gaze met his and he felt what she didn't say.
Tenderness brightened like a candle's flame, making it hard to breathe or actually say the words, so he took the easier path, since he would be leaving and nodded just once, nice and slow, fastening her with his gaze so she knew. He felt that for her, too.
She sidled up to him and handed him a clean, folded dishcloth. "Jack seems glad to be settled in his own room upstairs. He is going to have a lot of space up there."
"And Pete to keep him company." He drew in a bite of air in relief, glad she'd found a safer topic, one that didn't make his heart rend quite so hard.
A peal of laughter rang like welcome summer thunder though the house, and those familiar voices murmured in conversation breezing their way also, and he resisted the urge to peek around the corner and set his eyes on his child one more time. Here, he'd feared that the boy's whole world had come to end, when instead this had turned out to be really a new beginning. At least, it helped him to think of it that way, or he would never be able to set foot out that door.
He dunked the dishcloth into the hot, soapy water and began submerging the empty cups into the water to soak. Saydee, sweetly smiling of lilacs and temptation, leaned across him to slip a handful of forks into the water, too. Heat kicked through his groin, threatening to make him hard, and he breathed in Saydee's heat and light and yearning hit him like the leading edge of a January blizzard. He gritted his teeth to keep from reaching out and pulling her into his arms, already imagining how easy it would be to shimmy off that dress she wore. His hungry eyes didn't miss her pulse fluttering in the hollow at her throat just above her collar or the rounded soft peaks of her breasts he'd give just about anything to kiss, hold and squeeze. Oh, to have that right again and more.
"Listen to them. Everyone is having fun without us, and we seem to be alone." He cleared his throat to hide the need gruff in his voice. "What are we going to do about that?"
"I have no idea, since the last time it was just you and me, you took liberties with me. You were very brazen and bold."
"Yes, I surprised myself. I'm a tricky after all." He winked and reached for the dish towel she held and took it out of her hands.
"You didn't surprise me at all," she said. "I took one look at you when I found you on my land and I knew you were trouble."
"True. I can't argue with you there."
She watched his eyes darken and his pupils dilate. Heaven help her, she wanted to stop, it would be wise to, but every inch of her skin, whether exposed or hidden beneath her garments, felt charged. Her breast tingled with awareness and her nipples pebbled painfully, remembering. Wishing. Anticipating. "You're supposed to be in the living room with the rest of the guests. I should be doing the dishes."
"But I like this better." His hot fingertip traced the line of her jaw. "I like being alone with you."
"Yes, I do too, but look at the trouble you can get me into."
"Still, the privilege of it is something to hope for." That clever finger of his glided down her neck to the top curves of her breasts.
Her whole body flamed. "Aunt Peg could come marching in here at any moment. We're in trouble enough as it is."
"Then what's a little more trouble to add to it?" He leaned in closer and their lips brushed. "I'm determined to be good and behave myself and now look what you made me do."
"Me? You're going to blame me for that little almost nothing kiss?" She laughed as his hand skimmed down her back and settled at her hip.
"A little nothing of a kiss, huh? Then I'd better really give you something to blame me for. I want to deserve it." His mouth touched hers and claimed her with a hot, tender, passionate kiss. Desire lifted through her in delectable spirals. She felt as if her whole body would melt right there on the spot.
"Sorry, but you are going to have to work a little harder at that kiss," she breathed, her mouth to his, half kiss, half talk.
His mouth brushed hers again. "I just wanted to make sure you want this before I really get started kissing you. But judging by the way you're pressing up against me, you want this, too."
"More than life." It hurt to be that honest, and although he'd been also bantering and charming her, she felt his sadness, not only his need to be loved by her. "I'm so glad you found me, that you came to me for help."
"It means the world to me that I can count on you, Saydee. It brings me to my knees." His voice dipped, and the gratitude tolling in his words and shadowed in his eyes could not be mistaken. Nor could the glint of desire in his eyes that he craved her physically, and the truth was she loved him far too much for her own good.
Footsteps tapped in their direction, breaking them apart. Startled, Saydee looked up to see a familiar face grin at her across the length of the kitchen.
"Ha! I caught you, you scoundrel, stealing a quiet moment with my beautiful niece. Who could blame you?" Peg swept around the table, skirts swishing, mouth in a feigned line of disapproval but her eyes were laughing. "Don't think I wasn't young once, not that I'm old now. Goodness, that flame still burns, don't think it doesn't, so I know what's going on in here."
Saydee watched Winn chuckle and shake his head, unable to deny it but remained unable to figure out what to say as Peg bustled around the counter and into the kitchen.
"Goodness, what do you think you're doing in here? The dishes? Huh, why I can't leave you two alone for a moment, Winn. What do you think you're doing romancing my niece? You have plenty of time for that, what you need is more of my angel food cake. Now, off with you to the parlor. I've got a plate and fork for you on the coffee table. Never miss an opportunity for cake. That's some of the best advice I have."
"Then I guess I'd better take it, I sure do appreciate such fine advice from a real quality lady such as you, Peg, but what about leaving poor Saydee with the dishes?"
"If you must, then do them for her. Don't think I can't see what you'd like to continue to keep doing. As long as you keep both hands in the dishwater, I suppose it's safe to leave you two alone and unchaperoned."
"Maybe I could ask your help is getting Saydee to sit down and relax, and let me do the rest of the kitchen work. I ought to make good on my vow to pay my way and not let her spoil me too much, and as she provided food, the least I can do is provide her with more wage-worthy labor to compensate for it. See what I mean? She might be the one in need of the cake right now."
"Sure, Winn, that's why I now like you much better than I ever possibly dreamed I would." Peg winked and grabbed hold of Saydee's arm. "That's why I'm going to adore you. Come along, pretty niece of mine. Let's get you some dessert. Let that man spoil you up a bit. Now, I'm really starting to approve."
Saydee didn't think she should protest, judging by how pleased her dear aunt was, beaming her approval at the kind, quiet strong man at the sink, washing the silverware. She let the older woman tug her out of the kitchen and into the eating area where the lamplight made a path toward the sofa and she felt already lonely for the man. She felt tingling-alive and fully aware of the hard, physical longing to be with him, even if it was only standing side by side, just like they'd been before Peg found them. She yearned for that closeness again and wished that the storm might never blow itself out and so he could not go. She was not ready to say goodbye to him.
But Peg drew her to a stop at the sofa, where light and warmth were made more cozy by the laughter of family gathered together, and now that included Jack too. Nola held out a plate and fork for her, and she sat down beside Jack, who grinned up at her, trying so hard to be the boy he'd promised his father to be. She heard the faintest clink of silverware clattering together and her heart turned toward the man she could not see.