Their Christmas Vows

by Margaret McDonagh

  And a husband waiting for her to get there. Frazer wanted to growl out loud. That or throw something Bloody woman. She'd got under his skin. Not in a good way, but like an annoying, persistent grass seed, worming its way into his flesh, irritating him and resisting ail efforts to remove it. He'd always laughed off his exaggerated reputation, but the scathing way Callie had looked at him had stung. He wasn't die kind of man she thought he was. Damned if he knew why it should matter what she thought of him, but it did. And that made him madder than ever.

  Hamish nuzzled against him, and Frazer scratched the loyal little dog behind the ears. At least he could count on somebody. To hell with Callie Grogan. She was nothing to him. It was a bonus that they work well together, but it was clear that any friendship or understanding beyond that was never going to happen. So be it. If that was the way she wanted things, it was fine with him. He wouldn't give the infuriating woman another thought.

  A low woof drew him from his reverie.

  `You're right, Hamish. Life is too short. Let's g out of here and have some fun.'

  The dog trotting at his heels, he went to complete the hand-over to the shift coming on for the night, left a pile of paperwork on Archie's desk and, after phoning the hospital to check on the condition of the casualties they had seen that day, feeling pleased all were stable, went to collect his things before heading for home. He'd pick up some flowers and pay a visit to the one woman who always gave him a warm welcome. His grandmother, Lily. The decision made, lie slipped out his cellphone and pressed the key for one of the few numbers he had on speed dial.

  `Hi, sweetheart, it's me,' he greeted, smiling at the round of the familiar voice.

  `How's my favourite woman? No, I'm leaving now. I thought I'd pick something up and spend the evening with you. Of course! You know I'd do anything for you! See you soon.'

  Frazer's sexy voice and intimate words rang in Callie's ears. She ducked back into the female locker room, cursing herself for eavesdropping, even if it had been accidental. And to think she had considered apologising for turning down Frazer's invitation. It hadn't taken him long to find up another date for the evening with one of his many women, had it? How foolish of her to ever think he had been sincere, genuine. Collecting her things, thankful to avoid seeing him again, she made her escape, fretting all her way home to the small house she had rented town.

  She'd baited Frazer on purpose, and even though she was annoyed at the way he had reacted, turning swiftly to one of his women, she now felt bad about her own actions. Mostly because her reasoning was so skewed. She'd been scared of weakening, so she had deliberately created more of a barrier between them-just as she had used her wedding ring as an emotional shield, slipping it back on her finger in front of Frazer as a statement. It certainly wasn't because she wanted any reminder of feckless, uncaring Ed, the man who had done a runner after a few months of marriage, rejecting her the moment things had become remotely tough. A cynical smile twisted her lips as she thought of the vows they had made at the register office. For better or worse, in sickness and in health. Yeah, right. Bastard.

  Once home, she tell the tension of the day drain out of her. She was exhausted-they had been maniacally busy-and yet the exhilaration of the job was everything she had

  imagined it would be. The buzz, the adrenalin rush, never knowing what was going to happen next. If only it was ail like that, with none of the difficult moments with Frazer in between, or Craig and the others asking questions about her that she didn't want to answer.

  Eyes watched her as she flopped down on the sofa.

  `You want to know about my day?' she asked of her silent audience, thankful to have someone with whom she could let off steam. `I made an idiot of myself. The work part was good, though. More than good. I loved it. But meeting Frazer Mclnnes was an experience 1'll never forget.'

  Frazer. Just thinking about him brought a mix of unsettling sensations. She could still remember the feel of his hands on her for those brief moments, the awareness that had rippled through her, the needy response of her body. It had shocked her. The last thing she had expected was to be attracted to him. And however much she wished to deny it-and she would never admit it to another living soul-Frazer was the most deliciously sexy man she had ever met. No wonder he had women falling over themselves to catch his attention. That brought a return of her scowl as she wondered who he was with that night, who had filled the gap after she had turned down a drink with him. Not that she was interested.

  On the professional side, Frazer was an amazing doctor-not just skilled, but cairn and empathetic with patients, too. She admired that. She didn't want to, didn't want to like anything about him, but he'd slipped under her skin in just one day. In future she should have to be careful to make sure she maintained her distance, because she very much feared she could be as foolish as the next woman and lose her head if she allowed that stealthy charm and blatant sexuality to affect her.

  `Thank you. I could use a cuddle right about now.' She smiled as her audience of two rescue cats sidled Closer and vied for prime position in her lap, purring with contentment as she stroked their soft fur. `And he has a dog.' The purring briefly ceased, and she could almost see both cats narrow their green eyes at the mention of the `d' word. `Exactly. You wouldn't like Hamish, would you? Shows just how polar opposite Frazer and I are. We're as different as...well, cats and dogs. Anyway, nothing could ever come of any unlikely attraction.' Not if Frazer-or any manfound out the truth about her, she added silently, her jaw stiffening with stubborn pride as she fought back any hint of self pity. `Much the best thing to focus on work and work only. Who needs a man, anyway?'

  Paws gently kneaded her thigh and Callie sighed. disgruntled with her thoughts, turning her attention back to her companions. Both cats had been stuck in a shelter in Glasgow for a long time, unwanted because they weren't perfect. Pecan had lost part her tail, and Maple had needed one front leg amputation after being hit by a car. Callie knew all about not being perfect, and about rejection, so she had immediate been drawn to the two middle-aged sinters. There never been any doubt that the pair were coming home with her. They were both an unusual dark tortoises their coats streaked and mottled with shades of gold buff, copper and brown. She had chosen their name's partly due to their colour and partly due to her favorite flavours in Danish pastries and ice cream, for which she had a sinful passion.

  She was disconcerted that thoughts of sinful passion brought Frazer back to mind. No way was she going there. But she had been amazed at how well they had worked together-as if they had been doing it for years and were already an established team.

  Whatever else she thought of him-and she really didn't want to spend too long assessing her disturbing personal reaction to the man-Frazer was an exceptional doctor. That impression had only been enhanced as her first day whizzed by, leaving her little time to worry about Frazer the man as she worked alongside him with increasing admiration his medical skips.

  Her new life in Strathlochan was filled with and promise. She thought of Annie Webster realised she had the opportunity to make her one real friend. Maybe more than one. Perhaps could even come to feel as if she belonged somewhere for the first time in her life. And maybe, just maybe, this Christmas wouldn't be a lonely one. All she had to do was find the courage reach out and take what she sensed was possible.

  It almost sounded easy, but she knew it couldn't be.

  As for work, the job itself was everything she had imagined. The only problem was Frazer. But she couldn't allow the playboy doctor and her unwanted reaction to him to spoil the best chance she had for a start. In the days and weeks ahead she just hoped she could keep up her guard and ensure that any dealings with Frazer remained strictly professional.

  CHAPTER THREE

  `LIE still, Paul.'

  Frazer heard the edge of exasperation in Callie's voice as she struggled to insert the first of two large-bore cannulae while coping with their fractious patient. `He's in hypovolaemic shock,' he com
mented, knowing that accounted for some of the young man's confusion and aggression.

  The emergency call had come in at four in the morning, waking them from a light doze after what had been the quietest shift so far-the final one in their first six-day rotation together. Now they were kneeling on the hard wet tarmac. It was dark, raining and freezing cold, and the only available light came from the headlights of their vehicle and that of the police car on scene. They had arrived at the site of the accident to find twenty-two-year-old Paul in pain and uncooperative to say the least. His pulse-rate was high, he was tachycardic, his blood pressure showed normal systolic but raised diastolic levels, he was cold and clammy and his skin had an unnatural pallor.

  `Get off me,' the man complained, not for the first time.

  Callie's voice remained admirably calm. `Let us help you.'

  Paul had suffered a serious leg injury when he had been knocked off his bike, trying to cycle back to an outlying village from one of the nightclubs in Strathlochan. A hit and run, according to the local policeman who had been first on the scene, and who remained now to assist them, with his partner taking evidence. Paul had a badly broken left leg, with open fractures of both fibula and tibia apparent. Considerable blood loss, combined with possible internal injuries and bleeding, had resulted in him going into hypovolaemic shock. As Callie concentrated on getting fluids into him, along with the analgesia he'd prescribed, Frazer was working to stem the haemorrhage in the leg...bringing the bones back into fine to restore circulation to the foot, maintaining pressure and raising the limb to control the bleeding.

  `How's he doing?' Frazer asked, waiting as Callie rechecked the vital signs, calling them off to him.

  `Capillary refill is slow, pulse one-twenty, no change in blood pressure, respiration twenty per minute, saturation ninety-two per cent on oxygen.'

  `Thanks. Run a second pack of Hartmann's in, please, Callie.'

  As she moved to do as requested Paul lashed out, thrashing on the ground. His powerful arm caught her with a heavy blow on the shoulder, sending her sprawling, and she cried out as she impacted with the crash-bars on the front of their all-terrain vehicle, smashing the ribs high up on her right side. `Callie!'

  His heart thudding with concern, frustrated because he was unable to leave his post and reduce pressure on Paul's leg, Frazer could only watch as one of the two policemen ran across to help her. Gingerly she steadied herself, but he saw her wince, her hand briefly straying to a place high on her right side. Cursing under his breath, he accepted the policeman's assistance to control the patient's movements.

  `Callie, are you all right?' he demanded, his gaze raking over her as she returned to her place and set up the extra IV fluid infusion he had asked for.

  `I'm fine.' He was sure she was lying. She tried to mark it, but he could hear the shakiness in her voice. 'I'm running the Hartmann's now.'

  Frazer beckoned to the policeman. 'Cm you pull some gloves on and put pressure on this leg? That's it-just there. Thanks. Callie, I'm going to sedate and tube him. Any word on the other paramedic team arriving?' he queried, moving up to the other side of the patient.

  `ETA five minutes,' the second policeman confirmed.

  Again the patient pulled off the oxygen mask, and Frazer moved to replace it while Callie prepared the items he needed.

  `He's not responding as quickly as I would expect after the fluid replacement.' Frazer frowned, trying to do another check of the vital signs while catching hold of Paul's flailing arm. 'OK, buddy, cairn down. We're trying to help you here. I'm worried he might have an exsanguinating haemorrhage from a pelvic injury. Ready, Callie?'

  `Ready.'

  As she handed him the required doses of etomide and suxamethonium, he swiftly anaesthetised and intubated Paul, regaining some control of the situation. At least they could now work without further risk to the patient or themselves.

  `Maintain fluid resuscitation, please, and we'll top up the sedation with some propofol as necessary.'

  `Do you want the pelvic splint as well as the leg one?' Callie asked, and he frowned as he noted the way she unconsciously pressed a hand to her injured side, near the curve of her breast.

  `I'll get them.'

  Frazer's gaze lingered on her for a moment before he moved off to their vehicle, returning after a couple of moments with the items he needed. As he fitted the pelvic splint, to stabilise any damage and reduce possible bleeding, he reflected again on how well he and Callie worked together-and yet she was as much of a mystery to him now as when they had first met. She had been particularly uncomfortable once their night shifts had started. At first he had wondered if her nervousness was due to her husband. Was he difficult? Did he dislike her having to stay overnight at the base? Yet to his knowledge

  she had never telephoned anyone, and no phone calls had arrived from her husband, checking she was all right. Not that Callie was ever anything less than efficient and independent. She was just edgy, difficult to get to know, reserved. Despite all his efforts over the last six days he had been unable to draw her out, and she remained disinclined to talk. About anything. Only on the job was she relaxed, vocal and at ease. `The ambulance is here.'

  He looked up, thankful to have the back-up to transfer the patient to hospital. 'I'm going to splint the leg now, then I want Paul out of here asap.' After completing the task, securing the leg, he moved back to face Callie. `Are you all right to drive back if I go in the ambulance?'

  `Of course. I'1l clear up here and meet you at the hospital.'

  The false cheeriness in her tone didn't fool him for a second. Frazer hesitated, wanting to argue, but she kept her gaze averted, her hands busy, and he knew he couldn't delay any longer. Their patient needed urgent surgical intervention. Pulling off his bloodied gloves, he reached out and caught her chin, holding her gaze to his. For a moment he was sidetracked by the feel of impossibly soft skin, and his fingers lingered, caressing her cheek, betraying him. He saw those stunning eyes widen with shock and an unexpected vulnerability. Just for a moment, so brief he was sure he must have imagined it, she pressed her face to his palet, and he tried to ignore the sudden and inappropriate flare of heat that coursed through his body in response.

  `Be careful,' he instructed her, his voice huskier than he'd intended, knowing the words could equally apply to himself and how he was feeling about this enigmatic woman.

  This enigmatic, married woman.

  The unsettling thought made him retreat. Dropping his hand, feeling burned and aroused from that all-too-short physical contact with her, confused by his jumbled emotions, he rose to his feet and put distance between them. Pulling on fresh gloves, he helped the two paramedics transfer Paul to the ambulance, then climbed inside. For a moment, before the door closed, he glanced back at Callie, seeing the careful way she held herself white trying to pretend nothing was wrong. He didn't like leaving her. Not at ail. And he wasn't buying her act. The minute he had her safely back at the base he was going to satisfy himself about the extent of her injury-whether she liked it or not.

  Callie had no idea how she made it to Strathlochan. After accepting help from the young policeman to pack the kit back into the four-by-four, she left him and his partner to their investigations of the hit and run accident and drove slowly to the hospital, mindful of the appalling road conditions. Her side burned with pain, but thankfully it wasn't the side she had to use to change gears. It was, however, the side of her body that had been the site of the problems which had started eighteen months ago.

  The only thing that stopped the discomfort from swamping her was the unnerving memory of the feel of Frazer's touch. Her skin tingled even now from the feel of his fingers, the gentle yet masculine brush of them, which had sent a bolt of electric current through her body, centring on a throbbing ache deep within her. And she was mortified that she had sought his touch, had lingered, had pressed her face to him. Why had she done that? She couldn't feel any attraction for Frazer. She just couldn't. And she had to h
ide how much she hurt or he would get suspicious and no way was she ever letting him

  see. It was too terrible to contemplate that he should find out about her, know she wasn't whole, wasn't normal.

  She remembered his teasing with one of the guys over a famous singer's `assets' in the crew room a couple of days ago.

  'Don't you just love a woman's breasts?' one of the techs had sighed, clearly smitten with the bust blonde in the magazine.

  'I'm a leg man myself,' Craig, their pilot, had drawled, before commenting lovingly on his wife. `A fact Eve uses unmercifully to torment me.'

  Frazer had laughed. `I love all of a woman.'

  Callie felt cold remembering. He loved all of a woman...if she was perfect, undamaged. She could imagine how disgusted he would be if he knew about her, if he saw her. Which was never going to happen She couldn't explain the way she reacted to Frazer. She was scared because he made her feel things that were alien to her, made her desire things she knew she would never be able to have. He was way to gorgeous and sexy for her peace of mind, an because she wasn't immune to him she had to do she could to put barriers between them and keep at bay.

  She had always found it difficult to trust, to rope herself to another person. The one time in her life she had tried it, taking a chance on Ed at his most charming and marrying him, she had been betrayed soon afterwards. He had shown her what a mistake it was to trust anyone but herself. It wouldn't happen again. She planned never to let anyone else get close to her again. It hurt too much.

  She would never forget the things Ed had said to her at the end. The whole marriage experience had been a disappointment as his charm had been only surface-deep. Unlike his lies and deception. But those had only been revealed once the problems had begun.

  She never should have married him-she had no idea now why she had done so. Only that she had felt an overwhelming need to belong, to have a family. It hadn't happened. Now it never would.