He remained out of sight for much of their time at the fair, until he finally reappeared as they were preparing to leave, his arms wrapped tightly around his coat.
“Where have you been?” Selina asked. And why was he holding his coat so strangely? She raised one eyebrow.
Edmund shifted on his feet. “I lost my way.” Without another word, he strode forward, following behind the others in their group. As if remembering something important, he turned back, nearly slipping as he offered Selina his arm. Even as he escorted her off the ice, he still held his coat carefully. She gave a curious smile, studying the side of his face. His mouth was serious, his eyes fixed straight ahead. She said nothing, keeping a close eye on his coat to see if it might reveal what he was hiding.
“Did you enjoy your visit to the fair?” she asked.
Edmund nodded. “It was equally diverting as the last two visits.” He cast her a lopsided smile. “Well, perhaps not so much so as the first one.”
Since he mentioned it, Selina watched the ice, careful to avoid falling on him again. Her curiosity continued to rise as she watched him adjust a small lump under his coat.
“You did not lose your way today, did you, Edmund?” she blurted.
He looked at her with wide eyes, seemingly shocked by her sudden accusation. “I did, indeed.”
“I suspect you were buying yourself a souvenir, despite your determination not to bend to the steep prices the fair demands.” She cast him a sneaky smile. “There is no need to hide your treasure from me. Tell me what you found that you could not resist.” She cast a pointed look at his coat.
Edmund held her gaze for several seconds, maintaining his innocent, round eyes. The expression reminded Selina of when he was a child, and she nearly burst out laughing. “Not to worry. I will not reveal your secret to anyone. You have my silence.” She kept her voice quiet so Mama would not overhear.
“It is nothing,” Edmund said, his voice much less amused than she had expected it to be. Was he offended by her teasing? She clamped her mouth shut.
“Won’t you tell me what it is?”
He shook his head, avoiding her gaze.
Her heart plummeted as Edmund handed her inside the coach without another word, crossing his arms tightly around himself once more. Selina looked out the window as they drove home, her brow furrowed. She had never seen Edmund so . . . odd. By the time they reached home without a word passed between them, Selina was certain she had done something to offend him.
Even at dinner, he retired early to his room with a simple, “Goodnight.”
Selina’s heart stung as she climbed the stairs, an ache spreading through her limbs. Perhaps she had been wrong about everything, not only about Noah. Perhaps she had also been wrong to believe that Edmund cared for her at all. He was a polite, amiable gentleman, who treated every lady with respect. The image of Edmund and Miss Perry beneath the kissing bough flitted through her mind again, and she banished it at once, fighting against the uncertainty that swirled in her heart. Until she was no longer engaged to Noah, Edmund had every reason to be distant, she reassured herself. Tomorrow when she saw Noah, everything would change. But her entire body still ached with disappointment as she walked around the last corner to her bedchamber.
She stopped in the hall, catching sight of a small brown package wrapped in a gold ribbon, placed just outside her door.
Glancing to each side, she found the hall deserted. Placed where it was, the package could only have been for her. Her heart pounded as she bent down to retrieve it, slipping inside her room before tugging on one end of the ribbon. It unraveled, and the brown paper spread open.
She pressed one hand to her chest. The miniature tiger statue she had admired her first day at the fair sat atop the paper, one paw lifted as if to strike. She traced her finger over the engraved stripes, and her other hand crept to her throat as it tightened with emotion. Had Edmund done this?
Who else could it have been?
She scoured the packaging for a note but found nothing. It was improper for Edmund to give Selina a gift, even during Christmastide. The exchanging of gifts was never condoned among single men and women, so Edmund had not signed his name on the gift, knowing it would still be recognized as his.
Her heart thudded as a tear escaped the corner of her eye. She had been worried for nothing. Edmund had been thinking of her the entire fair, and the rest of the day that followed. He had not been aloof. He had only been vexed that she had nearly ruined his surprise.
She sniffed, scooping up the tiger and placing it on her writing desk. Tomorrow she would thank him. Tomorrow all would be made right.
And she was fairly certain that, despite her worry over facing Mr. Skinner, she would sleep with a smile plastered on her face.
Chapter 16
Selina ate breakfast alone the morning of New Year’s Eve, waiting a little longer than usual in her chair to see if Edmund would come to the breakfast room. She had spent the night searching for the right words to thank him for his thoughtful gift but hadn’t been able to find ones that would adequately explain what it meant to her. What he meant to her.
There was no proper way for her to tell him the latter—at least not until he confessed similar feelings to her. And certainly not until she broke her engagement with Noah.
She had told Noah she would come by his father’s office in the morning, but they had not planned a specific time. She scraped the prongs of her fork across her plate, dreading the moment she would have to speak the other words she had been practicing.
As she mulled through all that weighed on her mind, the door creaked open. Selina glanced up quickly, a broad smile on her face. But it wasn’t Edmund at the door. Mama stood in her white morning dress, hands clasped in front of her.
“Good morning, Selina.”
“Good morning, Mama.” Selina eyed her carefully. What was that eager smile all about?
“There is a secret I have been keeping from you,” Mama said, her smile growing. “And I wish to tell you as my New Year’s gift to you.”
Selina frowned. How many gifts could she be given in such a short time? She studied Mama’s expression, relieved to find that she seemed quite happy with this secret. The worry faded from Selina’s chest, allowing her lungs to fill with air. She hadn’t realized that she had been holding her breath. “I did not know you were one to keep secrets.”
Mama laughed. “Well, this one was far too delicate to share until now.”
“Are you marrying again?” Selina guessed.
“Oh, heavens no!” Mama threw out her hand. “But this secret of mine . . . it could make it far easier for you to marry well.”
Selina’s confusion increased more with each passing second.
“Come with me,” Mama said. “We will be more comfortable in the drawing room.”
Selina’s brow furrowed as she followed Mama into the hallway, and she jumped a little when Mama closed the drawing room door behind them.
“Now that we are in a more private place,” Mama said, “I may tell you.”
Selina’s heart pounded as she waited for the revelation of Mama’s strange secret.
Mama took a deep breath before walking forward to take Selina’s hands. “You are a very wealthy young woman.”
Selina raised both eyebrows. “Pardon me?”
“Do you remember your Aunt and Uncle Ellis in Cheshire? Well, Mr. Ellis has made a fortune in his trade. With no children of their own, Mr. Ellis thought to give a portion to his late brother’s daughter, and another portion to me.” Mama’s eyes filled with tears. “His generosity has left you with a portion amounting to roughly fifteen thousand pounds.”
Selina’s jaw dropped, and she covered her mouth with one hand. “Fifteen thousand?”
Mama gave her arm a tight squeeze. “Indeed. Can you even believe it?”
Selina’s head spun. That must have been why Mama had taken the liberties she had with hosting so many dinner parties and purchasing new decor
ations. She had been given money too, enough to support her for years to come. “When did you learn of this?” Selina asked, her voice still tight with shock. “How long have you kept it from me?”
“There were many arrangements I had to make with the solicitor several months ago, before it could all be made final.” Mama’s eyes glistened. “Think of how much more eager Sir Edmund will be to marry you when he discovers your inheritance.”
Selina’s stomach dropped. “I don’t think Edmund would be influenced too greatly by money.”
Mama laughed, swatting her hand through the air. “Any man would.”
Selina scowled at the ground as she tried to slow her racing thoughts, struggling to grasp onto just one at a time.
“What a wonderful new year this will be,” Mama said. “To usher it in with good fortune such as this? I expect we shall be reaping our rewards of good fortune all year long.”
Selina looked up, putting a smile on her face. “I thank you for telling me today. It is a much better gift than I could have ever asked for.”
Mama nodded. “Nothing could compare.”
As they discussed a few more of the details of her inheritance, Selina hardly heard a thing. She stared out the drawing room window, watching the light snowfall as if it held the answers she sought.
Any man would.
Her thoughts traveled back to her conversation with Edmund by the fire in the library on Christmas Day, when he had asked her if Noah had ever told her why he wished to marry her. She had not known the answer then, but a suspicion had begun creeping into her mind, driving a sharp pain into her heart.
Had he never loved her at all?
Could he have known of her inheritance from the beginning?
When they made their way back into the hallway, Selina walked slowly back toward her room, trying to stop her legs from shaking. When she took the first three steps up the staircase, Edmund appeared at the top, starting down the stairs toward her.
She steadied her hand on the banister, watching Edmund’s boots as he approached. When he stopped just two stairs above her, she looked up. His concerned expression brought a lump to her throat. “Edmund.” She shook her head. “I have just received the most unexpected news.” She was still struggling to believe that it was true. “I cannot comprehend it, even now, after nearly an hour has passed since I heard it.”
Edmund did not seem surprised at all, his features flickering with understanding. “Your inheritance.”
Selina’s eyes rounded. “You knew? How did you learn of this before I did?”
He gave a slow nod, his jaw tight, as if he regretted making her aware of his knowledge. “I cannot tell you that. Not yet. But I must ask that you trust me.”
Selina’s heart thudded as she was reminded of her mother’s words. Any man would be enticed by money. Could that mean Edmund was too? If he had already known of her inheritance, then that could have been the reason he was seeking to win her affections during his visit. She recalled how determined he had been to keep her away from Noah when he had first come to London. Was it because he wanted her fortune for himself? Mama’s secret had obviously not been as well-kept as she thought it had.
Dread settled heavily into her stomach.
“Why did you suddenly wish to spend time with me?” Selina asked.
Edmund’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”
“We seemed to be rivals until one day you began treating me differently.” She took a deep breath, asking the question that burned in her throat. “You seemed as though you were determined to win my affections. Was it because you hoped to win my fortune?”
“No.” Edmund stepped down a stair, bending down to look at her face. “That was never the reason.”
“Then what was the reason?” Selina fought the tears burning behind her eyes. She had to know if Edmund cared for her or not. No matter the answer, she had to know. She fixed him with a stern look, not allowing him to lie or escape her question.
Edmund released a slow breath. “When my efforts to separate you from Skinner failed, I decided that in order to help you realize that you did not care for him as you thought, I would encourage you to . . . fall in love with me instead. I thought you might learn that what you felt for Skinner was not any stronger than what you could feel for me.” He regarded her seriously, his brows drawing together. “That was how it began, but I assure you, I feel differently now.”
Selina blinked hard, her heart pounding. She backed away one step, then another, until her feet hit the base of the stairs. Betrayal stung in her chest. “If you did not want my fortune, then why did you think to toy with my heart in such a way in order to keep me from Mr. Skinner? How do I know if you have been lying about him all this time? Perhaps you were the one deceiving me, not him.” A tear hovered on her lashes, falling slowly down her cheek.
Edmund moved to the base of the stairs to stand in front of her, swiping away the tear on her cheek with his thumb. He opened his mouth to speak before his gaze lifted to the window behind her, his eyes narrowing slightly. She turned, following his gaze to where Noah stood in the snow just behind the house. Her heart leaped. “What is he doing here?”
She cast one more look at Edmund before hurrying to the door. She had to stop Noah before Mama could see him. Her mind still spun with questions as she stepped out into the frigid air, wrapping her arms around herself. She hadn’t stopped to put on her coat, so a shiver had already begun its ascent over her skin.
“Selina.” Noah walked toward her, leaving deep prints in the snow. “I was very worried when you didn’t come.”
As he approached, her stomach tightened in a knot. His face showed genuine concern, but she couldn’t help but wonder if it was for her . . . or her fifteen thousand pounds. His hands wrapped around hers as he reached her, just as they always did, but today they were cold.
“What delayed you?” he asked, his intense brown eyes boring into hers.
“My mother had some unexpected news to relay to me. I am still in awe when I think of it.” Selina shivered again.
Noah’s eyes sparked with interest. “What did she tell you?”
“Of my inheritance.”
“Inheritance?” Noah’s voice rose with surprise, though her insides remained unsettled.
“Did you know I was inheriting fifteen thousand pounds?” Selina held his gaze as firmly as she could.
Noah shook his head fast. “I hadn’t the slightest idea, but that is astonishing news, indeed.” He gave a broad smile. “How did I manage to be so fortunate as to marry a woman of such beauty and fortune? Though, as you already know, I would marry you no matter your financial situation.” He gazed into her eyes, but he failed to look half as genuine as Edmund had moments before.
What had Edmund been about to say to her? When he had seen Noah out the window, his words had been stopped short. He had told her he had begun by trying to secure her affections without intending to fall in love with her, but that he felt differently now. Her heart pounded. But how could he explain how he knew of her inheritance?
Noah’s voice pulled her thoughts back to him. “Is something amiss?”
She shifted uncomfortably; snow had begun melting through her sleeves. Had his grip on her hands tightened? She couldn’t be certain. Before she could lose her courage, she took a deep breath. “Yes.”
“What is it, my love?”
His words would have melted her heart once, but now they felt very much like a lie. “I cannot marry you.”
The concern melted off his brow, his eyes flashing with shock. “I’m afraid I don’t understand. What has caused this hesitation?” The tone of his voice grew harder.
“I have been hesitant all along,” Selina said, keeping her voice confident. “I—I did not have the courage to tell you.”
The roundness of Noah’s eyes flattened slightly, his jaw tightening. “Was this Sir Edmund’s doing? What has he told you?”
Selina’s heart sprung against her chest, and she was tem
pted to tug her hands from his grip. She had obeyed Edmund’s request not to mention his presence at her home, or not to mention his name at all. So why had Noah suspected him to be responsible for her doubts? She maintained an innocent expression. “Sir Edmund? I have not seen him since that day at the Frost Fair.”
Noah studied her face with no small amount of skepticism but didn’t question her further. She exhaled slowly to calm her racing heart.
“Well, there is no reason for you to hesitate. We have agreed to marry, and so we shall. All the arrangements have been made.” He smiled down at her as if nothing had changed, as if her refusal meant nothing.
She shook her head. “I meant what I said. I will not marry you.”
He laughed under his breath, glancing heavenward before meeting her gaze again. “There is no need for that.”
“I don’t want to marry you.” She spoke each word firmly so he would not misunderstand.
“You do not know what you want, Selina. You are nervous, that is all.” Noah’s voice was final, and his hands tightened around hers. Her pulse pounded past her ears as panic spread through her veins. Where was Edmund? Her back was to the house, so he couldn’t see that she was distressed.
Noah leaned closer, and before she could glance back at the house, he pressed his lips firmly to hers, holding the back of her neck so she couldn’t pull away as quickly as she wanted to. Her body froze with shock until she fully realized what was happening. Her mind snapped to attention, and she pulled away, but he brought her lips back to his forcefully. He still gripped her right hand, but she used her left to push against him, sending him staggering back a pace. Her face was hot with anger. She tried to wrench her other hand free, but his grip was firm.
Her Silent Knight: A Christmas Regency Romance (Belles of Christmas: Frost Fair Book 1) Page 13