A Touch Morbid

by Leah Clifford

  Az’s legs went out. He slammed his hands over his ears, his fingers digging into the sides of his head as he dropped to his knees, rolled over onto his side.

  “No, Az!” Eden dropped, grabbed Az’s fingers and pried them away. “He’s Falling.”

  “Shit,” Jarrod whispered. He’d seen Az this way before, in the basement of the building with Luke. Adam had called him and he’d gone, thinking he could talk him down. Jarrod thought he’d been more shell-shocked than mad. And then Luke had shown up, and Adam’s eyes had glossed over. And the garden clippers. Jarrod forced away the memories, came back to the present. “What do you need, Eden. How do I help?”

  “I don’t know.” She shook her head, panicked. “We shouldn’t have gone. He wasn’t this bad earlier.” Eden laid a hand on Az’s shoulder. “I thought he was better, that it would help him to get out.”

  “Earlier today?” Jarrod scanned the apartment with a desperate hope that something would jump out at him, anything that could help. And then he had it. “This happened earlier and you talked him down, didn’t you?” She blinked hard, nodded once. He gestured to Az. “So talk to him!”

  She grabbed Az’s face in her hands. “Az, look at me.” Her voice shook. “You open your eyes right now and you look at me, Az.”

  Az’s head bobbed, almost as if he were drunk. “Get away,” Az whispered. “I can’t make it stop.”

  “No!” She grabbed his hand and held their entwined fingers up in front of his face, even though his eyes were still shut tight. “This is me and you together. And I am not letting you go.” Her other hand grabbed his wrist.

  Jarrod shifted awkwardly from foot to foot, not sure whether he should leave, whether she wanted him to hear her saying these things. On the floor, Az hitched a shallow breath.

  The trembling stopped. And then a strange guttural chittering came from Az.

  Jarrod launched forward and yanked on Eden’s shoulder. “Back up.” He tightened his grip. “Eden, back up now.”

  She kept her hand in Az’s. “I’m not leaving him,” Eden said. Jarrod stayed next to her, ready to make a move if Az tried anything.

  “Can you hear me?” she whispered. Az stayed silent and still. She let go of his wrist, touched his cheek. He tensed and leaned into her palm. She turned to Jarrod. “I think he’s—”

  “So many sins.” Az’s voice, eerie and mechanical, startled both of them.

  “Az?” Jarrod’s head cocked to the side.

  His eyes snapped open. They weren’t covered in the black oily sheen Jarrod had expected. Instead, the colored centers of his eyes were gone. They had turned completely white. Eden dropped his hand, scrambling away.

  Jarrod sucked in a sharp breath. “That can’t be good.”

  “Petulant.” His smile wasn’t natural. It invaded his face, ripping its way onto his lips. He turned his head, and the dead white eyes seemed to train on Eden. “She’s a mortal flaw, a wicked taint upon your glory.” The smile stretched wider. “The penance is served. Choose. Rise.” He nodded twice and shuddered. “Azazel, you are wanted,” he screeched. Then the frightened words belonged to Az again. “I’ll never go back.” He ground clenched teeth. He slammed a hand against the ground, his fingers tightening into claws even as his face relaxed.

  Az sucked in a sudden lungful of air as if resurfacing, then fell to the floor.

  Jarrod put himself between Eden and Az before she could move. “Open your eyes,” he commanded.

  Az raised his head, his face pale, eyes their normal blue. They found Eden. She crawled forward as Jarrod moved aside.

  “Are you okay?” she asked, reaching for his hand. He latched on like it was a lifeline.

  “You sure you’re cool now?” Jarrod asked. “What the hell just happened? Your eyes were completely white.”

  Az sat up. “But that doesn’t make any sense,” he murmured. He looked up at Jarrod. “Not unless the Bound were…” He trailed off. “Sorry, I’m not thinking straight. My head’s killing me.”

  Eden shifted closer to him, almost on his lap, as if he’d disappear at any second.

  “You remember what you were saying?” Jarrod asked, not willing to let him get them off topic. Something was going on. “That was Upstairs stuff coming out of your mouth, man.”

  Az shook his head. “I don’t know what it was. We saw Michael. He was looking for Gabe.”

  “Who the hell is Michael?” Jarrod asked. “And Eden said you were bad earlier? What happened?”

  Az moved gingerly at first, got his legs underneath him and stood. “I’m fine now. Can we let it go?”

  Jarrod opened his mouth, but it was Eden who spoke.

  “No.” She reached out and let him help her up. “These are things we need to know, Az. Who’s Michael?”

  “He’s…” He shrugged his shoulders as if unable to explain. “He’s Gabe’s. They used to be together. For so long. But then Michael led the charges against me, got me kicked out of Upstairs. He wanted Gabriel to turn his back on me, to shun me. Gabe refused. Michael told me I would only drag Gabe down with me.” Az’s brow pinched. “I guess I did,” he mumbled.

  An awkward silence filled the room. Then Eden broke it.

  “The things he was saying at the tree, though, he was trying to get you to Fall, wasn’t he?” She looked to Jarrod as if for backup before she went on. “And here, it sounded like you were possessed. Can the Bound do that?”

  “No,” Az said instantly.

  “You sure about that?” Jarrod asked. “‘Azazel, you are wanted’ sounds pretty clear-cut.”

  “Right, so at the tree he wanted me to Fall and here he wanted me Bound again?” Az shook his head. “I have to decide to go home. I have to want it. The Bound don’t fight for anyone. Ever. I would have to choose to go Upstairs for them to not see me as Fallen.”

  He swayed on his feet, and Eden took his elbow. “The Bound didn’t fight for me, and I got thrown out for love. Without the wings, and with…” He paused. “With what he did, Gabe’s not getting a second chance.”

  Eden helped Az to the doorway of her room. Jarrod followed.

  “This isn’t about Gabe,” Jarrod insisted. “This is about you and what happened and the crazy shit you were saying about Upstairs after seeing the Bound!”

  Eden’s hand tensed on Az’s waist. “Jarrod, let it go. I’m sure it was a weird coincidence,” she said.

  Jarrod opened his mouth to protest until Eden glanced back at him over her shoulder. The look they shared was the same.

  She wasn’t buying Az’s flimsy story either.

  CHAPTER 9

  Eden lay in her bed, propped against the headboard, listening. She’d left the door to her bedroom open a crack. Jarrod had shut down the laptop and gone to bed half an hour ago. Az had tumbled onto the couch shortly after. Now, everything was silent.

  But are they sleeping? She tucked her phone under the covers to hide the light and checked the time. After midnight. Normally, the apartment would still be active, but with Jarrod’s new job and the stress of everything Az had gone through, both the boys were out. She rubbed her neck, refusing to acknowledge how much she longed to lie back and give in to her own exhaustion.

  No. She slid quietly out of bed, fully clothed under the blanket. The boys could rest tonight, but they couldn’t all afford to take the night off.

  Eden slipped on her coat, grabbed her shoes. Before she left, she dropped a pre-written note onto her bed. If Az came into her room and found her gone, at least he would know she was okay.

  She took a deep breath and held it as she crossed the living room, intent on the soft sounds of Az’s breaths. They stayed deep and even. She made it to the front door, turned the knob slowly, and wriggled through into the hall.

  Scrolling down her contacts list, she yanked on her shoes.

  “You’re late,” Madeline said as the call connected.

  “Only a few minutes. You’re here?” Eden kept her voice a whisper. Sound carried in the hall, but
she knew she was being paranoid. She opened the security door and hung up when she saw her.

  Madeline lowered the phone she held. “What the hell are you wearing?”

  Eden’s skirt rode high up on her thighs, the leggings she wore underneath razor ripped and shredded. Under her open coat, her shirt’s neckline skimmed across the top of her breasts, leaving damn little to the imagination. She sighed at Madeline’s outfit with disdain. The straight-laced fashion sense bugged her on the best day. Tonight it set her teeth grinding. She eyed the pastel blue top Madeline wore.

  “Gabe’s Fallen. He’s most likely to be in some back alley. Under a bridge. Squatting.” Eden started walking down the sidewalk, Madeline beside her. Already she regretted calling, but she didn’t dare go out searching alone. The angels weren’t the only ones Eden would need to worry about tonight. “The places we look aren’t safe. And the people we find there don’t take kindly to people in clean jeans and sweater sets.”

  “Clearly you’ve given this some thought,” Madeline said, sounding impressed. “The problem is—” She hesitated for effect and Eden rolled her eyes. “Why would he be on the street if he could kill someone for their wallet and sleep in a cushy bed?”

  Eden exhaled an angry cloud. “He wouldn’t do that.”

  “You don’t know the Fallen. They con, Eden. They steal and trick and deceive. They want for nothing.”

  “You said you heard there were complications, though.” Eden gave her a sidelong glance. “Gabe—”

  “Is one of them. Stop pretending he’s not.” She shoved her hands deeper into the pockets of her tailored jacket. “Besides,” she said, throwing a hand into the air to hail them a cab. “I’ll be damned if I’m traipsing into every cracked-out hovel in the city.”

  Eden ducked into an upscale restaurant, edging past the hostess with a gesture at an imaginary table at the back of the room. She scanned the patrons and shot back every glare from the high-society bitches around her.

  After two hours of what felt a hell of a lot like aimless wandering through Soho, it was becoming clear that Madeline’s Gabe-dar wasn’t as accurate as she’d made it out to be in the cab.

  Eden ignored snickers at her clothes as she completed her loop.

  “Is there something I can help you with?” the hostess snipped. Eden didn’t have the energy to work up a snarky reply. Madeline stood beside her unbothered, fitting in flawlessly.

  “Where to next?” Madeline asked before she opened the door and headed back into the cold.

  Eden followed without answering. When she and Az went searching, she could almost feel Gabe around each corner, just out of sight, the premonition strong enough to quicken her steps. But with Madeline, there was nothing.

  “He’s not here,” Eden said, defeated. “He’s not anywhere.” She eyed a small Thai place as they walked past it, but the fight had left her. She didn’t go in. She’d hoped. Really hoped this would be the time they’d find him.

  “Giving up so soon?”

  Eden’s head snapped up at the amusement in Madeline’s tone. A trickle of unease crept up her spine.

  “It’s starting to feel like a bit of a wild goose chase,” Eden said. She’d called Madeline, hoping she’d help her find Gabe, that the incentive of having Vaughn killed would push Madeline. But with the boredom, the halfhearted attempts at describing Gabe to doormen and waiters while Eden grilled for answers—it almost seemed as if Madeline weren’t really searching at all. “It’s starting to feel like you only wanted me away from the apartment.”

  Madeline raised an eyebrow at the accusation. But then the twinkle in her eye caught fire. A devilish grin spread across her face.

  “What did you do?” Eden demanded.

  Madeline shrugged innocently. “Nothing,” she said slowly, drawing the word out.

  Eden backed away from her down the sidewalk, stumbling as she bumped into people. Someone shoved her aside. She pulled the phone from her pocket with a shaking hand, only let her eyes flick away from Madeline’s long enough to cue up Az’s cell. “You hurt them and I’ll end you, I swear to God.”

  The smile dropped from Madeline’s face. “Has anyone ever told you that you have serious trust issues?” she shouted as she covered the space Eden had put between them. “I promise, Az and Jarrod are home, safe and sleeping.”

  Eden glanced up. “I have no reason to believe you.”

  Her thumb moved to hit Send.

  “Wait.” Madeline lifted a finger. “How furious would Az be that you aren’t home?” She dug into her coat pocket, pulled out her own phone and handed it to Eden. “He’s fine. So’s Jarrod.”

  On Madeline’s display was a list of text messages, the same one sent every fifteen minutes since they’d been out. “Apt entrance clear. No lights.”

  “They’re safe and sleeping, Eden.” Madeline took the phone back gently.

  “You have someone watching?” Eden asked. Her voice wavered, angry and uncertain, knowing how easily Madeline could have had someone send her the texts. They meant nothing. Madeline nodded. “Is there some plan you know about? Is that why you’re having them … protected? And why wouldn’t you tell me?”

  “Because you wouldn’t see it as me being thoughtful.” She lifted a shoulder with a half smile and then sighed when Eden didn’t react. “I was flattered when you asked me to help you look for Gabe, and I didn’t want something to happen to your boys while you were gone. I know they mean a lot to you.”

  Eden ignored the attempt at buttering her up. “You’re not really looking for Gabe, though. You’re going through the motions.”

  Madeline nodded slowly as if considering it, not answering. “You told me I had to find him before you’d help with Vaughn.” She turned to Eden. “I’m asking you to reconsider. Gabe’s not meant to be found.”

  “Not a chance,” Eden said instantly. She headed toward the subway entrance they’d passed a block ago. “I’m going home. Call off your goons.”

  “Stop!” Madeline said with a laugh. “You’re overreacting. Let me call you a cab. On me.” Madeline gave her a sad smile when she turned around, and then stepped to the curb, her arm raised. When the car pulled up, Madeline gave Eden’s address and handed over cash. “You make it very difficult to be your friend, Eden.”

  “I don’t need friends.” Eden ripped open the door of the cab and slid in. “One second,” she said to the driver before rolling down the window. “What were you going to say earlier today? Before Az got bad? You said Gabe wasn’t on a bloody rampage. How did you know that?”

  Madeline twirled the end of her scarf. “Luke told me,” she said simply.

  “You said ‘last time I saw him.’ It was Luke you were talking about, right?”

  Madeline snorted. “No, I know exactly where Gabe is. I completely love traipsing around the city with you so I figured I’d keep it to myself.” She shook her head, laughing. “Eden, not everyone’s out to get you.”

  Eden stared at her for a moment. “Az and I ran into one of the Bound,” Eden blurted. “He had that same angel look. You’ll know him if you see him.”

  Madeline stepped back, the smile falling from her face. “Thank you.”

  She tapped her hand against the roof of the cab. As it drove off, Eden couldn’t help but turn back, the second time today she’d seen Madeline from a rear window. Both times she’d been doing something decent to help. Still, Eden had a long way to go before she trusted her.

  CHAPTER 10

  Kristen felt her face flush and tossed the covers aside. Underneath, she wore yesterday’s dress. She’d come home without a word to anyone, curled up in bed, and let the night slide by in unanswered attempts to call Gabe.

  The whispers had started an hour ago, minutes after Sebastian had popped his head in to check on her. She could hear the idle gossip, coming from the room next door. She’d stayed in bed, telling herself to ignore it, that they could have their talk. But as morning waned, so did her patience, their words growing more ha
rsh, brazenly disrespectful.

  You know she’s losing her mind, right? But really, nobody’s surprised.

  Her eyes snapped upward to the air duct near the ceiling. She slid the chair out from where it sat in front of her vanity, dragged it against the wall, and climbed onto the seat. Her fingers stretched for the lever that would shut the vent, cut off the metallic voices, their whispers invading her room.

  If they’d known she heard them, they’d be terrified of her wrath. Episode or not, it was still her home they stayed in, her they depended on for survival.

  But confronting them meant she’d have to address the rumors. Without sleep, her brain felt sluggish, too slow to come up with the lies she’d need.

  That she was fine. In control.

  Kristen slipped a finger behind the tiny lever, knocking it forward to snap the vent shut.

  I heard she used to live in a cemetery. What a freak.

  Kristen froze. They couldn’t know that. Couldn’t.

  She stood on her tiptoes, bringing her ear closer to the vent. Only Gabe knew about her past. Or so she’d thought.

  I heard she has worse secrets. Kristen startled, confused as the voice dropped, darker and breathless. Ones about the bad angels.

  Her foot slid back in reflex. For a second her toes caught on the edge of the seat, and pain seared through her foot. She slammed onto the ground, her elbows striking the hardwood. No. No. They couldn’t know about Luke.

  She hobbled to the door, jerking it open. She’d burn confessions from their lips. The door to the next room was closed. She turned the knob.

  “You wicked little gossips!” she shrieked, her eyes flashing left to right. “You know nothing.”

  Silence slumped in every corner as if to mock her. The room held a bed, a dresser, a closet, opened and empty. Unoccupied.

  Or so it seemed. They were there, had to be there. She’d heard them.

  “You want to play games? We can play games.” She dropped to the floor, eyes sweeping under the bed. Nothing.