by Vella, Wendy
“Am I supposed to be surprised?”
“I need your help to find Bailey.”
“Okay.”
They searched, he and the man who had played a hand in straightening Joe out when he needed straightening. But they didn’t find her. It was hard going, because there were people everywhere, and most wanted to talk to him, or pat his dog, who was lapping up the attention.
“That dog’s a serious babe magnet. I never really realized it until now.”
“Yeah, every woman but the one I want seems to gravitate toward him.” Joe ran a frustrated hand through his hair.
“She’s not here, bud.”
“Fuck,” Joe said again, because nothing else fitted the moment, then went to the bar to get a drink. He’d call on her later when she’d calmed down, and apologize again. And he’d get her to talk to him about what was going on inside her head, while he attempted to get her to listen to what was inside his. Because one thing he did know was that whatever shit was between them, it had seriously derailed him, as was evidenced by his recent dumbass behavior.
Bailey ran the entire way home. Shutting the front door, she slumped against it breathless.
“That you, Bailey?”
“Yes. How come you’re not still at the parade?” She found her friend in the conservatory. “I thought you were meeting Ben later?”
Maggie sat with a glass of wine and a tub of Ben and Jerry’s in front of her. The combo made Bailey wince. If the bottle had been full when she started, her friend was now halfway down it.
“Are you okay, Maggie?”
“Ben dumped me.”
Bailey stepped closer and saw her friend’s eyes were red, makeup smeared.
“Why didn’t you tell me at the parade?”
Maggs shrugged.
Bailey had zero experience with consoling friends who had been dumped, because she’d never had any close ones, or been dumped herself. She went on instinct and took the seat beside Maggs. Placing an arm around her shoulders, she then went in for a hug.
It wasn’t the most natural thing to her, but when Maggie slumped against her and started sniffing, Bailey thought she’d done something right. They sat in silence for a while, with Bailey making soothing noises and stroking Maggs’s hair. It was surprisingly comfortable, even considering her friend’s obvious distress.
“I hope he eats something rotten and spends a week with a vile stomach bug.”
“Nice.” Maggie sniffed again. “Who knew you could be mean.”
“I can be mean when my friend’s been hurt.”
Maggie started crying again.
“I’m sorry you’re hurting, Maggs.”
“Thank you, and thanks for being here.”
A knock had them both looking at the door.
“Who the hell is that?”
“I’ll go and get rid of them.” Bailey quickly got to her feet as someone knocked again, this time louder. “Don’t you worry about it. Just get another glass, and we’ll drink our way down the rest of the bottle.”
She ran to the front door and opened it, hoping that Joe Trainer didn’t stand on the other side. She wasn’t ready to face him again right now.
“Stand aside, I have supplies.” Piper gently pushed Bailey to one side, and entered with a bag over one arm. “I just saw the shithead Ben, and he told me he was single again, which lead me to believe a certain redhead may be heartbroken, as she was his other half until recently.”
“He didn’t?” Bailey whispered the words. “What a loser.”
“Yeah, well he’s got a nice bruise right in the middle of his foot now, because I stomped on his sneaker before walking away.”
Bailey looked down at the spiky heel of Piper’s boot.
“Good, and I hope you told him he was a loser as well?”
“And more,” Piper said. “Now I’m missing the party, but this is more important. Plus, if we cheer her up, we can head back in when things rev up later, and hopefully that dickhead will be gone.”
“Ah... sure,” Bailey said.
“Lock that sucker,” Piper threw over her shoulder. “We don’t want interruptions.”
Bailey clicked the lock on the front door.
“Jesus, Maggs, you look like a panda with those eyes.”
Bailey heard these words as she entered the conservatory. Maggie snuffled, which was better than the weeping of before.
“Sit, Bailey. We have some drinks to consume. I also brought my first aid kit,” Piper pulled out chocolate, “to eat while we crucify men in general. It’s part of the process.”
“Is it?” Bailey took the glass of wine Maggie handed her.
“Of course. We tell stories about men, and being dumped, etcetera.” Piper waved a hand about. “Not that there have been many,” she added.
Bailey took a large gulp of her wine, and listened as Maggs told the tale of Ben’s dumping. The fruity flavor was nice, and had her taking another.
“H-he played that card, ‘it’s not you, it’s me.’”
“Bastard,” Piper said around a mouthful of chocolate. “I hate that line. It’s a massive cop-out in my book.”
Maggs waved her wineglass at Piper as she spoke. “‘I’m just not ready to commit,’ he said.”
“Did you ask him to?” Piper asked.
“No, we never even touched on it.”
“Bastard.”
Bailey listened as Piper and Maggie talked, but she didn’t add anything, because she had no experience to speak from.
“But here’s the thing, Maggs, you knew he was a bad boy when you started dating him,” Piper said. “I told you that, as did others.”
“I like bad boys,” Maggs wailed. “Really like them, and that’s the problem. A good one would probably hang around longer, but I’ve never found one I like that makes me want to….” She waved her hands about, but Bailey had no clue what she was getting at.
“Jump them, Bailey. Hell, girl, get with the program.” Piper waved her chocolate at Bailey.
“But surely there’s more you want from a potential boyfriend than to just jump him?” Bailey had to admit that she had a slightly fuzzy head now. She’d never been a big drinker, and she was now halfway down the next glass.
“I start with the physical,” Maggs said.
“She’s shallow, Bailey, and proud of it.”
“Like you’d ever date anyone you didn’t want to jump, Pip, so don’t give me that.”
Bailey let them debate that topic while she drank more wine. When they were done, she surprised herself by saying, “I can’t tell you any stories because I’ve never been dumped.”
“Oh God,” Maggs wailed. “She’s famous and never been dumped.”
“No, no.” Bailey shook her head. “I’ve never been dumped because I’ve never had a man. I haven’t had any friends either... not real ones like you were, Maggie.”
Bailey hadn’t realized she’d silenced the room until she looked at the two women, now silent, both with their mouths open.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“ You’re a virgin?”
“No. I had sex once, it was horrible. He was there, I was there.” Bailey waved her hand about.
“Once?” Piper asked.
“Yes. I didn’t enjoy it, and left while he was sleeping.”
“N-no friends b-but me?” Maggie was crying again.
“I didn’t tell you to make you sadder, Maggs.”
“She’ll be fine.” Piper topped up Bailey’s wine. “How come you’ve never had a man in your life, when you’re hot, smart, and talented?”
Bailey shrugged; her head felt full of cotton wool. It was nice. The swirling thoughts had eased, and she was pleasantly mellow now.
“I didn’t have time, and I never really met anyone. My grandfather had me dropped off and picked up when I attended Juilliard, and I was never left alone at any of the parties we attended later when I was performing.”
“So he kept you a prisoner?” Maggie whispered.
/> “No. How could I be a prisoner, travelling the world? Although I did say to Joe the other day that I was inexperienced about the ways of the world because I’d never really had to do anything for myself... which just makes me sound pathetic,” Bailey added.
“Joe?” Piper looked even more interested.
“I was trying to work the washing machine. He taught me.”
Piper and Maggs exchanged a look that she had no idea how to interpret.
“Why did you let your granddad control you like that, Bailey?” Maggs asked her.
She’d thought about that often since she’d walked away from him. Why had she let her grandfather control every facet of her life? She was no closer to an answer yet.
“It just sort of happened, I guess, and he always told me he wanted the best for me, and I wanted to be the best pianist I could be, and to do that I didn’t need distractions.”
“So I need clarification here,” Piper said, handing Bailey chocolate, which did actually go surprisingly well with wine. “Trips to the mall, movie nights with friends, slumber parties, and the other prerequisite teenage stuff that helps you become a well-rounded adult... supposedly.”
Maggs snorted.
“You had none of that?”
Bailey shook her head.
“She never had birthday parties, either, because I would have been invited,” Maggs said.
“It wasn’t so bad.” Bailey felt embarrassed now. “Really, I’ve had a great life.”
“Tell me what cake you wanted as a child, and don’t lie. I bet you dreamed about it like everyone else.”
“Cake?”
“You know, the cake every little girl dreams of. Pink frosting, fairy dress, unicorn?”
“I don’t—”
“Yes, you did, so tell us,” Piper demanded.
She saw it in her head like she had once dreamed it would be. “I wanted a Mickey Mouse cake. Red and white spots and a set of black ears on the top. I saw it once, in a magazine my mother had, and it just kind of stuck with me.”
“You should have had it.” Maggs looked defiant. “Damn it, Bailey, you should have had it!”
“We can’t have everything we want, Maggs, and I had it good, believe me. And this is about you, not me.”
“What about Beau. Where was he?”
“Beau?” Piper looked at Maggs.
“Her brother. He’s six years older and lives in Paris.”
“He was around to start, then left to study and never really came back.”
“But you talk with him, right?”
Bailey shook her head.
“What?” Piper shook her head as if to clear it. “Why not? You should be Skyping him from your laptop regularly.”
She realized then how utterly pathetic she must sound in the eyes of these modern women. Bailey tried to explain how her life had been. “Practice just took up a lot of my time, so I never really got around to getting a computer. My grandfather didn’t have one, and I didn’t see a need for one either. Mostly I used the ones in the hotels. A lot of my time was spent travelling, doing promotions, or playing shows. When I had downtime I read books mainly. I liked not being able to read reviews and have people contact me.”
“But you could have communicated regularly with Beau, Bailey?” Maggie persisted.
“I-I… no I haven’t.” Putting her head in her hands, she cried. “I-I never cry!”
“You should, it’s totally cathartic,” Piper said, thrusting tissues into her hands. “You can’t beat a good cry for release. Other than sex that is, that works too.”
“Gr-grandfather told me that Beau had said I was a spoilt brat and wanted nothing more to do with me. When I rang Beau to talk about it with him, he had no time for me, which confirmed it.”
“Confirmed how? He may have been working, or sick... or having an off day, Bailey. I cannot believe you just called him once!” Maggs looked angry.
“I’ve spoken to him a few more times since then,” Bailey rushed to add. “But it’s stilted and both of us are uncomfortable.”
“That’s just bullshit, and I bet it’s your grandfather who caused the rift between you,” Piper added.
She tried to lighten the mood. “But I did spend my twenty-first birthday in Paris.”
“Okay, so I’m not feeling sorry for you after hearing that,” Maggs said. “When did you last speak to Beau?”
“I can’t remember.”
“Do you want to speak with him? Does he know you’ve run away?”
“I haven’t run away!” Bailey looked at the two women. “I had an accident, and after, I just didn’t want to do it anymore. The punishing schedules and living out of a suitcase. I wanted it to stop, so I walked away to have some breathing space.”
“Nice,” Piper said.
“Pass my laptop, Piper, it’s in that red case.” Maggs pointed to the small side table. Bailey watched Piper do as she was asked. Maggie got the computer out and opened the lid.
“What’s Beau’s full name?”
“Why?”
“Just give it to me, Bailey,” Maggie said.
“Beauregard Winston Jones.”
“And he lives in Paris?”
She nodded.
“What are you doing?”
“Finding him on Skype. We’ll send him a friend request, and see if he replies, although he’s not likely to remember me.”
“Really?” The thought of seeing her brother was terrifying, and yet exciting too. “But he may not want to speak to me.”
Maggs looked up briefly and shook her head. “I can’t believe the girl I knew let someone steamroller her like you have.”
“I didn’t... not all the time. It wasn’t all bad.” She felt the need to defend herself.
“No, I get that, but not having a phone, or a laptop. How the hell does that even happen? Then this shit with Beau, Bailey. It’s BS is what it is.”
Taking a breath, she told them the rest. “He controlled my money. I-I have none.”
“What?” Maggs’s shriek made Piper wince. “That bastard!”
“It’s complicated,” Bailey said, then swallowed more wine, as she wanted to keep the mellow feeling going, if only for tonight. “But when I started performing he set up a bank account, and gave me money. I then set one up, and he paid it into that. I thought it was sorted and I had control, but it wasn’t until I left I realized that wasn’t the case.”
“But it’s your money, surely?” Piper asked.
“It is, but he won’t release it to me until I return and start performing.”
“The scars on your arm?” Maggs asked. “That’s the accident?”
Bailey nodded.
“He’s accepted!”
“What?” Bailey moved to sit beside her friend and look at the screen in her lap. “How could he do that so soon?”
“The wonders of cyberspace, sweetie.”
Bailey held her breath for tense seconds, and then her brother appeared.
“Beau!”
“Bailey?”
His hair was longer, and his face more lined, but there he was. Her big, beautiful, older brother. She started crying again.
“Hey there, Beau. You probably don’t remember me, but I’m Maggie Winters.”
“I remember you, Maggie. You and Bailey went to school together.”
“That’s right. Well, your little sister has found her way to Ryker, and she’s had a few wines, so go easy on her.”
“What happened, Bailey? What did that bastard do to you? Jesus, look at you, you’re so beautiful.”
The siblings looked each other, seeing the changes the years had put on their faces.
“How long has it been since we’ve seen each other, Beau?” Bailey heard her friends leave the room, but didn’t look up. She kept her eyes on her brother.
“Years... hell, I don’t know. We talked, but even then not much, and there was so much between us.”
“I’m sorry, Beau, that things got complicated between
us. I never meant that to happen, but wasn’t sure how to fix things.”
“Me too, Bay... so sorry. I should have tried harder.”
“No, I’m to blame too, I let him control me. I should have pushed harder to speak to you, but he told me some things you’d said, and then when I called you, you seemed distant.”
“I’m a guy, we’re distant.” He made her laugh. “But I never said anything to him about you, Bailey, I promise. I missed you.”
“I missed you too. I’m sorry we didn’t try harder, Beau, and sorry we drifted apart.”
“That’s in the past now. Tell me what’s going on with you, Bailey. Why are you back in Ryker Falls? Fill me in on what I’ve missed.”
Beau’s hair was darker than Bailey’s. He had a square jaw, cheeks you could cut glass on, and piercing blue eyes. He’d been her idol until he left home and never returned.
“I called Mother, and Grandfather was home, about six months ago, but neither of them would talk about you, other than to say you were fine. What’s the real deal?”
“I had an accident, Beau. I fell through a window. My right arm and hand were damaged.”
“No one told me.” He looked shattered. “I would have come, and to hell with work.”
“No, I didn’t need someone else looking after me, Beau.”
“But my love is unconditional, Bailey. That’s where I differ from him.”
“I didn’t know that, though.”
He nodded. “I understand that, and like I said, I should have tried harder.”
“I had an operation to repair the damage, it went well, but then after rehab, I didn’t want to go back to playing. I’d had enough. I didn’t know who I was anymore. I suddenly wanted to experience what other people did.”
Her brother’s face was so serious, she wanted to reach through the screen and soothe away the worry lines.
“Jesus, Bay.” The breath hissed from his throat. “You should have told me. Should have let me come to you, bring you home with me.”
“It’s okay, Beau.”
“It’s not!” The words exploded through the screen. “How long?”
“How long what?” Bailey said, knowing exactly what he meant.
“How long have you felt like this? That you wanted to give it up.”