Trouble At School

by Chris Higgins

  “Does that mean she’s in VERY SERIOUS TROUBLE?” Claudia asked Mr Smart, her pert little nose twitching in excitement.

  “Are you going to send her to the Head?” asked Hetty, her long thin nose quivering in anticipation.

  “That’s enough, thank you, Claudia and Hetty!” said Mr Smart, looking very stern. “Did you forget to do your homework, Magda?”

  “No!” declared Magda hotly. “I’ve done it!”

  “She did, sir! I saw her!” added Bella bravely. What was Hetty up to? She knew the book was there. She’d handed it in herself.

  Mr Smart tutted. “In that case, the evidence should be here.” He began to check through the big pile of books one by one, while the whole class waited with bated breath.

  “Here it is!” he said, and opened it up. “Magda’s right. She’s done her homework.”

  Both Hetty and Magda looked surprised.

  “But, but …” protested Hetty.

  Magda said nothing.

  “Get your facts right, Hetty, and stop wasting my time,” Mr Smart said crossly. “I think you owe Magda a big apology!”

  “Sorry, Magda,” spluttered Hetty, and everyone in the class looked pleased. Even mean old Claudia Cleverley who was supposed to be her friend!

  Everyone, that is, except for Bella.

  Because something really terrible had just occurred to her!

  MAGIC AND SPELLS

  “Magda, I need to talk to you!” said Bella at playtime.

  But the next second, Claudia Cleverley and Hetty Snoop had marched up to them.

  “How did you do it?” demanded Hetty.

  “Do what?” asked Magda.

  “Make your book appear like that? You couldn’t find it in your bag. Then all of a sudden there it was, in the pile.”

  “Magic,” said Magda. “I can do magic tricks. Actually, I’m a witch. I’m going to cast a spell on you two and turn you into fat, slimy slugs. Oh no, I forgot – you already are.”

  “Ha, ha!” said Hetty, but she looked a bit nervous.

  “We’re not scared of you and your silly little friend,” said Claudia scornfully.

  “Are you sure? I can do it, you know.” Magda bent down, picked up a snail and began to rub its shell, chanting all the while in a croaky voice:

  “Abracadabra, my little snail,

  Make a spell that will not fail.

  Sticks and stones and stinky mud,

  Toads’ legs and lizards’ blood.

  A pinch of snot and a bucketful of sick,

  Mix it up to do the trick.

  Add dead fish eyes and crushed-up bugs,

  Turn Hetty and Claudia into slimy slugs.”

  Wow! thought Bella. Magda is really good at making up spells.

  Hetty, who was not quite as brave as Claudia, backed away.

  “Very funny,” said Claudia, but even she sounded a bit uncertain. “Come on, Hetty!” And the two of them marched off, arm in arm.

  Magda giggled and turned to Bella.

  “I’m not really a witch. I haven’t got a clue how my book appeared out of nowhere. It wasn’t in my bag when I looked. I thought I must have left it at home.”

  “You did,” sighed Bella. “After we did our homework in the café last night you took my book home by mistake. I handed in your book.”

  “Phew! Thanks, Bella,” said Magda with a big smile.

  Then her face changed.

  “But that means …”

  “You’ve left my book at home! And now I’m in VERY SERIOUS TROUBLE! Mr Smart will think that I haven’t done my homework,” said Bella, looking miserable. “Oh Magda, what should I do?”

  “Get Claudia’s book, cross her name out and write yours on it instead,” suggested Magda.

  “I think he’d notice,” said Bella.

  “Hetty’s?”

  “Ditto.”

  Magda sighed. “You’re right. Mr Smart is a stickler for homework. He takes it home every night to mark.” Her face lit up. “That’s it! What we must do is make sure he doesn’t take it home tonight. Then tomorrow we can come to school early and slip your book into the pile before he gets here.”

  “That sounds like a good plan,” said Bella. “But how do we stop him from taking the books home tonight?”

  “Don’t worry,” said Magda comfortingly. “I’ll think of something.”

  MAKING A PLAN

  Throughout the day, Magda thought of lots of ideas to prevent Mr Smart taking their books home to mark. She told Bella all of them. They included:

  •setting off the fire alarm

  •turning on the taps and flooding the school

  •starting a rumour that an earthquake was about to happen and the school would fall down

  •asking the prime minister to pass a law to say that homework is banned

  •telling Mr Smart that the government had declared books illegal so they all had to be burned immediately

  •saying that the Queen had announced that today was a public holiday and no one was allowed to do any work, especially marking

  •digging a pit on the school field and hiding all the homework books in it

  •locking Mr Smart in the book cupboard overnight

  •letting the tyres down on his car so he had to go home on the bus and therefore he wouldn’t be able to carry all their books

  •telling him that a spaceship had landed in the playground and an alien had been seen running into school, snatching Bella’s homework book and flying off again

  •standing up in assembly and shouting that a herd of angry bison was heading this way and they had to drop everything and go home NOW!

  There were lots more besides, most of them to do with fire and water and volcanoes and landslides and explosions and animals escaping from zoos and mad dogs and runaway trains. Each one was more extreme than the last and they were all designed to separate Mr Smart from his marking.

  But, when the bell rang for the end of school, Magda had run out of ideas and they still didn’t know what to do. And to make matters worse, Claudia and Hetty had informed them that they’d counted the books on the teacher’s desk and there was definitely one missing and they were going to tell Mr Smart.

  Claudia jumped to her feet. “Shall I carry the homework books out to your car for you, sir?”

  Bella felt sick with worry.

  “No thank you, Claudia,” said Mr Smart, reaching for his coat. “I’m not taking them home tonight.”

  The whole class stared at him open-mouthed.

  “Not taking them home?” echoed Bella, unable to believe her ears.

  “But, sir, there’s one missing!” squeaked Hetty. “I’ve counted them!”

  “And that means someone’s not prepared!” said Claudia triumphantly. “So, if they’ve already broken the first two rules, they should be sent to the Head.”

  Mr Smart groaned. “Hetty and Claudia, I haven’t got time for this. I’ve got to dash off to a conference and I won’t be back till the day after tomorrow. I’ll sort it out then.”

  “Ohhh!” said Claudia sulkily.

  “Does that mean we won’t have a teacher tomorrow?” asked Magda, her eyes lighting up.

  “You’ll have a supply teacher,” announced Mr Smart. “Now, everyone, I’m off.” And with that, he was gone.

  WALKING TO SCHOOL

  The next day, Bella and Sid walked to school by themselves. They were excited because they’d never been allowed to do it before. Where they used to live there were busy roads but here they could walk across the fields.

  Magda was waiting for them at the gate. With her were Tom, who was in their class, and Kizzy, his sister, who was in the class below. They lived in the farmhouse down the lane and they looked alike. Tom had brown hair with a heavy fringe and Kizzy had the same plus bunches that stuck out at the side of her head.

  Magda gave Bella her homework book. Phew! Bella tucked it safely into her bag in relief.

  “I can’t wait to see Claudia and Hetty�
�s faces when they find out an extra book has appeared,” chuckled Magda.

  The five children made their way along the lane to a stile. From here a path led across the first field, which had black and white cows in it. Bella and Sid looked at the cows doubtfully. Close up they were really big.

  “You’re right to be careful of cows,” said Kizzy, who seemed quite grown up for her age. “But it’s OK – these are ours and we know them all.”

  “Follow me,” said Tom. “I’ll introduce you.”

  He picked up a piece of wood to use as a walking stick and led the way. They marched along the path in single file, singing a song that Tom taught them.

  It went like this:

  “Hey ho, hey ho,

  It’s off to school we go.

  Past Brenda, Mo and Gert and Flo,

  Hey ho, hey ho, hey ho …

  Hey ho, hey ho,

  It’s off to school we go.

  Past Ivy, Daisy, Em and Maisy,

  Hey ho, hey ho, hey ho …”

  And so it went on, over and over again, until they’d named all the cows. Then Magda made up a rude verse that went like this:

  “Hey ho, hey ho,

  It’s off to school we go.

  Past Claudia Cleverley and Hetty Snoop,

  And lots and lots and lots of POOP!

  Hey ho, hey ho, hey ho …”

  The cows joined in too, mooing and swishing their tails.

  Soon they left the cows behind and marched through fields with houses backing on to them. More and more children spilled out of the houses to walk with them.

  “This is like a walking bus!” said Sid, his eyes shining. It was fun. Much more fun than being driven along the road in a boring old car.

  THE FAMOUS ARTIST

  When they got to school, Bella immediately tucked her book into the pile Mr Smart had left on his desk. Thank goodness that was over.

  “Looking forward to being sent to the Head tomorrow when Mr Smart comes back?” asked Claudia sweetly as she and Hetty walked into the classroom.

  “Who, me?” asked Magda innocently. “What for?”

  “Not handing your book in, of course.”

  “Magda’s book was there, remember?” Bella pointed out bravely.

  “D’you know what? I think you might have counted them wrong,” said Magda. “Try again.”

  Claudia and Hetty’s faces were a picture when they’d finished counting.

  Hetty turned to Bella and eyed her suspiciously. “Somebody’s book was missing, for sure. Someone must have added one. Was it you?”

  Bella stared back at her mutely, praying that no one in the class would tell on her.

  But nobody did, even though some people had seen Bella place it there.

  “Good morning!” came a loud, jolly voice from the doorway, and everyone jumped. “I’m your teacher for the day. My name is Miss Pringle. Sit down, everyone!”

  Everyone did as they were told, folded their arms like they did for Mr Smart and stared at her curiously. The teacher standing in front of them had lots of hair and bangles and beads and was very smiley.

  “What a quiet and obedient class you are! Would someone like to tell me what you normally do?”

  Claudia’s hand shot up.

  “Normally we learn something and then have a test on it. Normally I come top.”

  “Or I do!” interrupted Hetty.

  The teacher looked surprised. “Well … today is going to be different.”

  Everyone perked up. Except for Claudia and Hetty.

  “I’m an artist, you know,” she continued. “And today we’re going to let our hair down and HAVE FUN!”

  Everyone cheered. Except for Claudia and Hetty.

  “What sort of artist are you?” asked Hetty.

  “A FAMOUS ONE!” laughed the teacher.

  Claudia and Hetty sat up and looked interested.

  Then the Famous Artist talked (a lot!) about FREE EXPRESSION and how she would like them to LET LOOSE THEIR IMAGINATION and EXPLORE THEIR CREATIVITY.

  “Can we do anything we want?” asked Magda.

  “Anything,” said the Famous Artist.

  Bella could see the ideas bubbling out of Magda’s head.

  “Can we work in pairs?” asked Claudia Cleverley.

  “Of course.”

  “How long have we got?”

  “All day.” The Famous Artist looked at her watch. “Goodness me, is that the time already? We’d better get started.”

  As everyone jumped to their feet, she clapped her hands.

  “I nearly forgot. At the end of the day I will choose the best project and put it on display in my studio for everyone to see. And … the winners will be in the local newspaper!”

  Everyone cheered.

  “That’s us!” muttered Claudia Cleverley to Hetty Snoop. “We’ll be famous like her!”

  “Um … that’s assuming your project is the best,” said Magda.

  “Of course it will be,” said Claudia. “It always is. Please, Miss, shall we get the paints out for you?”

  “Creep!” said Magda, but the Famous Artist didn’t hear.

  “That’s very kind of you. Claudia and Hetty, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, Miss,” said Claudia smugly.

  She and Hetty got the paints out and took the best ones for themselves.

  A SPOT OF BOTHER

  Magda and Bella got down to work straight away. Magda was bursting with ideas.

  “Let’s do a model of a mermaid. We’ll make her tail out of fish scales and her hair from seaweed and her bikini top from seashells. Come on! I’ll ask if we can go to the beach to collect them.”

  But the Famous Artist said they weren’t allowed.

  “We could make a dinosaur. One that moves, with flashing eyes.”

  But the Famous Artist said that might prove too difficult.

  “We could make a car out of papier mâché. We did papier mâché in Mrs Goodenough’s class. It’s soggy paper that dries hard. Then we could take it to the garage and they could put an engine in and we could drive it!”

  But the Famous Artist said perhaps that was a little too ambitious.

  “I thought you said we could do anything we wanted?” said Magda, puzzled.

  “Look, maybe you’d better stick to painting,” suggested the Famous Artist, sounding just a teeny bit frazzled. “Get a move on. It needs to be finished today.”

  “We’re doing a painting of you, Miss,” said Hetty in her most oily voice, and Magda pulled a face.

  “Come on, let’s get some paints,” said Bella. But when they looked on the table there were only two pots left. One with a black top and one with a white top.

  Everyone else had already started. Most people had paint pots with three or four different coloured tops.

  Claudia and Hetty had paint pots with ten different coloured tops.

  “Please can we have some of your paints?” asked Bella nicely.

  “No!” snapped Claudia, putting her arms around the pots. “We need them all.”

  “We’re going to win the competition,” leered Hetty. “We’re going to be in the paper.”

  “No, you’re not – we are,” said Magda grimly, and she and Bella moved off to the corner of the classroom with their two pots of paint.

  “What can we paint that’s black and white?” asked Bella.

  “Um ... a newspaper?”

  Bella shook her head.

  “A zebra crossing?”

  Bella shook her head again.

  “A penguin?”

  Bella shrugged. She supposed it was better than nothing.

  “I know!” Magda’s eyes shone. “Let’s paint the cows. The ones we saw this morning!”

  “Yes!” said Bella, and first she, then Magda, had a go at drawing a cow on a big piece of paper. It was harder than they’d thought. But Tom came to their rescue and sketched some out for them so they could start painting.

  First they filled in the white patches very c
arefully indeed.

  “That’s looking nice!” said the Famous Artist.

  Bella glowed with pride.

  When the artist moved on, Claudia and Hetty came over to see.

  “Huh! Fancy painting silly old cows!” said Claudia.

  “You’re a silly old cow!” said Magda, and even though it was a very naughty thing to say, everyone who heard her laughed.

  Claudia went red with anger. And then she did something dreadful.

  She picked up her paintbrush and deliberately flicked it at Bella and Magda’s picture.

  And Hetty, who was just as bad, copied her.

  Bright blue and bright yellow paint splattered all over their beautiful picture.

  Everyone who saw it gasped. Magda picked up the pot of black paint but, before she could empty it over their heads, the Famous Artist rushed over.

  “What’s going on?” she demanded, her hands on her hips.

  “It was an accident,” said Claudia, wide-eyed and innocent. “Sorry, Magda.”

  “We tripped,” said Hetty, looking like butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth. “Sorry, Bella.”

  The whole class knew that they were lying – except for the Famous Artist.

  “Oh dear,” she said sadly. “These things happen.”

  Magda glared at Claudia and Hetty. “This is sabotage,” she said out of the corner of her mouth. “You’re not going to get away with it.”

  But Magda was no sneak. When she turned to the Famous Artist, she didn’t tell her what had really happened.

  Instead, to Bella’s surprise, she asked in a meek little voice, “Please, Miss, can we stay in at lunchtime to do it again?”