Shay’s lips pressed together for just a moment before he nodded. “I’ve never wanted to kiss anyone more.”
No one had ever had to think so hard before deciding to kiss her, but she didn’t take his hesitation personally. Lack of want wasn’t what held him back. It was something else. His past. His incredibly long past. She didn’t doubt a man could round up a whole lot of personal demons in a life that long.
Well, maybe she could ease some of them now.
She lifted herself up on tiptoes and pressed her body against his. The moment she did, heat like nothing she’d ever felt before rushed through her like a wave. It nearly toppled her over. Instinctively, she wrapped her arm around his neck to steady herself. She closed her eyes and lifted her chin, soaking in the sensation of his hard body against hers.
His arms folded around her, enveloping her…and it was a good thing too, because suddenly Nicole wasn’t so sure that she could even stand anymore. She felt like she’d been swallowed up by a storm of lush desire, more profound and seductive than anything she’d ever imagined.
She felt like the Heavens. Pressed flush against him, the full force of her desire sang out to him. It stirred him in ways he hadn’t even known were possible.
He’d been with women before. Plenty of them. Like most creatures that spent a good deal of their time in taverns, Shay didn’t have too much trouble finding company. After all, what was a tavern but a place that a traveller could slake all of his thirsts?
But there was nothing base or common about the sensations pouring out of the woman in his arms.
She wanted him, yes. Just like he wanted her. But the difference was all the emotions she held inside. They were strong and powerful…and foreign to him.
All he knew was that he wanted to experience them for himself.
Her tongue swept inside his mouth, and he was lost. The sweet taste of her. The soft feel of her body. The hum of her gorgeous soul pulsing in his veins.
He’d never kissed anyone the way he kissed her now. Fully. Completely. And yet he still wanted more. More of her brightness. More optimism. More passion. He wanted to drink in the feel of her until she’d filled every last bit of emptiness inside him.
He wanted to take a step forward until her legs hit the side of his bed. He wanted to lay her down. To lose himself in her completely.
But that wasn’t what she asked for.
She’d asked for a kiss. A single kiss. Not to be ravished on his bed.
And so with all the strength he could muster, Shay pulled away while he still could.
A little sound of protest fell from Nicole’s lips the moment his mouth left hers. She kept her eyes closed as a hint of a smile played at the corners of her lips. Satisfaction glowed brightly in her cheeks and in the tiny crinkles that radiated out from her eyes.
“Now that was a kiss,” she said after a long moment had passed. Another few seconds went by before she opened her deep brown eyes. The irises shone like dark, polished amber.
She untangled her arms from around him and took a step back. Her gaze darted down to the floor as her smile slowly changed. She didn’t look embarrassed exactly, just…aware.
Aware of how their bodies had felt together. How warm and right. Aware of the mattress behind her and all the potential that their kiss had promised. Aware of how easily they could fall on the bed and bring all that promise to life.
But this time she didn’t reach out for him.
She didn’t ask for another kiss.
She just glanced down at his shirt on the bed.
“I should change my clothes,” she said.
There was nothing overly seductive about the tone of her voice. There didn’t need to be. Just the thought of Nicole stripping off her dress to drape herself in his shirt was enough to keep the fire inside him burning bright.
“And you would rather be alone to do that?” he asked.
If she could be bold, so could he.
“I think it would be…” She bit into her lower lip. “Wise.”
Shay smiled at her careful choice of words.
She was right. It would be ridiculous to pretend that there was no spark of desire between them. A kiss was one thing—a distinctly dangerous thing, sure, but something on a level that both of them could handle.
But if they gave in to those more fiery urges…
That would be a different story.
Right now, it was better to keep whatever was between them in the realm of playful. Of manageable.
“Agreed.” He couldn’t help raising his hand to trace his fingers down her soft cheek as he spoke. “But I would like to give you something before I go take up my post for the night.”
“What’s that?” she asked.
“Let me help you sleep,” he said.
Nicole shook her head. “I told you—“
“You told me not to use magic on you without your consent. That’s why I’m asking.” He raised a finger to her lips before she could say a word. “And before you argue, remember, I can feel everything that you’re feeling.”
Her eyes grew wide at his boldness. For the first time a real hint of embarrassment flashed over her features.
“Don’t worry. My emotions are equally…raised.” It was the truth, and a little of her tension faded. “I know that if I were to try to fall sleep right now, I’d toss and turn for hours. And you can’t fight Marrow if you’re exhausted.”
She eyed him skeptically for a moment, but he could already feel the worst of her resistance slipping away. After a long moment, she finally nodded.
“All right.” She raised her hand. “But only if you promise to wake me when it’s my turn to keep watch.”
He nodded. “I promise.”
She didn’t flinch as he raised his hand and brushed the pad of his thumb against her forehead. Her eyelids immediately fluttered. Tension swept out of her body in waves, and she sat down on the mattress.
“I’ll leave you to change,” he said, forcing himself to turn from her and walk out the door. She wasn’t going to remain awake very long, and she needed to change before she fell into a deep, restful sleep.
It didn’t matter that he wanted to stay and watch over her. He needed to be sharp. Focused. For himself. For the exiles. And for Nicole.
He couldn’t lose sight of the big picture. That was the thought he forced himself to hold in his mind as he clicked the door closed behind him.
Chapter Eleven
Nicole’s eyes fluttered open as she was gently rocked from the depths of sleep. She blinked slowly, wanting nothing more than to close her eyes again and nestle even deeper into the warm blankets surrounding her.
She’d been lost in the most beautiful dream. At least, that’s what she thought it was. It’s what it had to be. What else could it be? She’d been asleep, after all.
Except the thing was, it hadn’t felt like any dream she’d had before. Everything had felt startlingly and profoundly real.
She’d been walking through an open field, but everything there was slightly different. The sky was bluer. The sun brighter. Even the ground felt softer under her feet.
When she reached out and felt the petal of a flower, the delicate and silky texture teased the tips of her fingers. The little hairs along her arms had moved when the breeze blew over the plain. Even now as she was pulled back into harsh reality, the memory was as real as any other in her mind. As if she hadn’t just been dreaming. As if she’d really been there.
But she couldn’t have been.
Nicole looked around the room. At least she tried. Her eyes should have been accustomed to the dark of the room—her eyes had been closed, after all—but she couldn’t see anything but darkness and shadows. Just as if she’d stepped into the dark bedroom from the bright noonday sun.
Just like the full sun of the meadow.
Sleepily, she sat up in bed, and tried to focus in on Shay sitting on the mattress beside her, but she couldn’t make out anything other than his shadowy shape.
“I was having the most amazing dream,” she said as she stretched. “I was in a place I’d never been before. A wild place. It was all bright and beautiful, but kind of strange. Like a…” She struggled to find the right word. “A fantasy, I guess. The grass was tall, but a little too green. When I brushed my hands over their tops, golden sparkles came off and floated around me in the air.”
His hand tightened just a touch around the curve of her shoulder.
“Then there were birds flying above my head. Their wings shimmered all different colors depending on how the light hit their feathers. And off in the distance I could see an ocean. Except the water wasn’t blue. It was—”
“Silver,” Shay finished for her. “The ocean was filled with waves of liquid silver.”
A strange note filled his low voice—wistfulness and…longing, maybe?
She cocked her head to the side. “How did you know that?”
He didn’t answer right away, and Nicole could have sworn that she felt his whole body stiffen on the bed. She leaned in closer, still trying to make out his expression. But it was no good. She couldn’t see in the dark, so she reached over and clicked on the bedside lamp.
Light flooded the room, illuminating his features. But his face wasn’t the hard mask she expected to find. If anything, his expression was openly reflective and vulnerable.
“Is everything okay?” she asked.
“Of course.”
“Really?” She arched a brow. It obviously wasn’t. “How did you know what I dreamed?”
“That meadow you dreamed about…” He paused. Nicole could tell that whatever he was about to say, it was hard for him. “It’s Elysium.”
“The ancient Greek heaven?”
Funny. A week ago, this conversation would have seemed absurd, but right now it was just par for the course.
“No. The real one,” he said. “The place that I was born.”
Nicole’s eyes widened. Suddenly, she didn’t feel sleepy anymore. “I dreamed about a real place in the Realm?”
“From your description, you didn’t just dream about Elysium,” he said. “It sounds like you actually saw it.”
“How is that possible?”
“I don’t know.” He ran his fingers through his dark hair. “It shouldn’t be.”
There had to be a rational explanation. “I probably just heard you talking about it at some point over the last couple days.”
“I’ve never spoken of Elysium to anyone.” He sounded certain.
“Well, then maybe my dad or grandfather told me the story.”
Again, he shook his head. “Even if they had, you still wouldn’t know what it looked like. Not with the detail that you just described it.”
“Why not?”
“Because no one but a jinni has ever seen it,” he said. “No other creature can cross its boundary.”
“So, how did I get to go there in a dream?”
Shay focused his gaze on the wall across from the bed and breathed out a long sigh. “My guess is that the sliver of your soul saw it inside mine and somehow relayed the vision back to you in a dream.”
Cool. At least, she thought it sounded cool. Shay didn’t look like he shared the sentiment. “Does that happen often?”
“It doesn’t happen ever.”
“I guess the connection between us is stronger than we thought.”
“You think we’re growing closer?”
Nicole rolled her eyes. She pulled at the shirt draped over her chest. "Shay, I’m wearing your clothes. I just woke up in your bed, and the last thing I did before falling asleep was kiss you for like two minutes straight. So, yeah, I’d say we’re not exactly the strangers we were forty-eight hours ago.”
Shay’s gaze intensified. For a moment Nicole couldn’t read his expression at all. She wasn’t sure if the thought pleased him or only added to his upset.
Either way, she couldn’t blame him. She wasn’t sure how the thought affected her either. Wanting to jump each other’s bones was one thing. But being actual soul mates…
Well, she wasn’t sure she was ready for that level of commitment.
“If it makes you feel any better, the place I saw was insanely beautiful,” she said, trying to make him feel better. “I can see why you like it so much.”
“I never said I liked it.”
“You didn’t have to,” she said. “While I was there I felt this amazing sense of peace. It sure wasn’t coming from me. If you threw me into a place that unusual, I’d be weirded out. So, that peaceful, content feeling had to be coming from the same place as everything I was touching and seeing. You.”
Shay looked up at the ceiling. Worry and frustration pulled at his features. “This shouldn’t be possible.”
Nicole tried to hold back her laugh, but a tiny giggle found its way out.
“Sorry,” she said, covering his hand with her own. “It’s just that’s the same thought that’s been running through my head for the last two days straight. So, welcome to the party.”
“I’ve just never had anyone in my head before.”
“It’s a trip, isn’t it?”
A hint of smile lifted his lips. “That’s an understatement.”
True enough.
“You said you’d never taken a mortal soul,” she said. “Maybe this is just a side effect of dealing wishes on Earth.”
“No.” He spoke without hesitation, without doubt. “You were right the first time. It’s because we’re growing closer.”
“Have you ever held the soul of someone you’ve been close to before?”
“Of course not,” he said. “I’ve never been close to anyone.”
Nicole’s brows shot up. “No one? You’ve never been close to anybody? Not in your whole life?”
“No one,” he repeated.
That was hard to believe. “Not even your parents?”
“Jinn don’t have parents,” he said. “Not the way you know them anyway.”
“But you said that Elysium was where you were born.”
“It was,” he said. “But I didn’t have a mom or a dad. I was born from the primal force of creation itself.”
What?
What did that mean? What did it even look like? Her imagination whirled, but came up short. “That’s a thing?”
Now it was his turn to laugh. “It is.”
“Okay…” She paused again, trying to work it out in her mind. “So, when was your birthday?”
“A long time ago.” The look he gave her hinted that she didn’t really want to know the answer.
She asked anyway. “Hundred of years ago? Thousands?”
“Hundreds of thousands.”
Whoa.
Nicole blinked. She knew jinni could be old, but she’d never really thought about just how old. And why would she when Shay looked like he had just started cruising through his thirties?
Her baffled expression must have amused him, because his smile only grew. “My guess is that I was born around the same time that humans came into existence.”
“Oh my God,” she said, choking on laughter. “You’re literally as old as Adam.”
“I suppose I am.” Shay smiled back. “Is that a problem?”
“No.” Nicole shook her head. “I mean, it makes me a hypocrite for getting creeped out by guys who are in relationships with girls that are twenty years younger.”
“So, we’re in a relationship?” He arched a brow.
“I don’t know what we are.” It was the truth. “You’re an ancient creature that was breathed into existence, and I’m a geeky book historian. If we started fighting crime, they’d give us a TV show.”
The corners of his eyes narrowed slightly. “I don’t know what that means.”
Nicole patted his hand and laughed to herself. He had to be the cutest thing she’d ever seen.
“That’s okay,” she said. “I almost forgot. It’s my turn to keep watch now.”
Nicole looked around the room t
o check the time, but didn’t see a clock. The lucky bastard probably didn’t need one. He probably magically knew what time it was. Either that or he didn’t need to worry about such mundane things.
So, she looked over at the window instead. A pale sliver of light shone through a crack in draped jeweled-tone fabric. It was close to dawn. Nice. As long as she was able to make herself a cup of coffee, she would probably be able to keep herself awake until the sun was fully up.
She pulled back the sheet and swung her feet down onto the floor. “Here you go. The bed’s nice and warm for you.”
“Are you sure you want to get up?” Shay asked as she stood up from the bed.
Nicole wasn’t sure if he was asking if she was sure she wanted to take her turn watching for Marrow, or if she was sure she didn’t want to join him in bed.
Either way, the answer was the same.
“I’m sure,” she said.
God knew, she’d like nothing better than to dive back under those covers and snuggle up at Shay’s side, but she couldn’t. She had responsibilities. He’d already looked after her. Now it was time for her to return the favor.
She walked across the room, but something stopped her before she reached for the doorknob. Somehow it didn’t feel quite right leaving him this way. Not yet.
There was something weighing on her mind. She had a feeling it was weighing on his. Nicole wasn’t exactly sure how to say it, but when had that ever stopped her before?
“I’m not going to do anything weird in your head,” she said. “I mean I don’t plan on diving into any secret corners, or stirring up any long settled dust. I don’t know why I’m there, but I know I’m a guest. And I promise I plan on acting like a good one.”
A strange look came into his eyes. The look intensified. A couple of sparks floated up. “I know.”
She nodded, told him good night, and shut the door. She stood there for a minute after it had clicked closed. She could still feel the warm embrace of his gaze wrapped around her.
She could still feel him. Near her. Around her. Inside her.
Nicole let out a breath and then another. And one more. Only then did she turn and go into the kitchen to try to find some coffee.
Jinn: Exiles of the Realm Page 11