The Guarded Widow

by K M Gaffney

  “I, well, I,” she stammered.

  Annoyed by getting caught and feeling guilty about it, she stubbornly raised her chin. “This is my house, Gavin. I was looking for the safe Jeff told me about. I just found it, but I can’t believe it, it’s empty,” she said, looking up at him in exasperation.

  Gavin yanked her out of the closet and walked her over to the edge of the bed.

  “Sit down,” he instructed.

  She glared at him, but complied. As she watched him walk over to the dresser and wrench open the top drawer, she realized why the safe was empty.

  Gavin had gained access to it first.

  “Masters spilled his guts after I threatened to knock the teeth out of his head. I found them last night,” he told her, lifting a thick overstuffed manila folder out of the drawer. “This is what your attacker wanted, Olivia. There are numerous copies of the fake insurance policies your late husband and his accomplice were selling. They must’ve been collecting the premiums from these policies and then sharing the proceeds for a number of years based on the dates recorded. I was planning on telling you about them today and then turning it all over to Ron, for processing.”

  He cupped her face within his hand and rubbed his thumb over the lone tear which escaped down her cheek. “I’ll leave you alone to look over these by yourself.”

  Olivia stopped his retreat by firmly placing her hand over his.

  “Please wait to hand them over,” she pleaded in a devastated tone of voice. “Please wait until after the holidays and the anniversary of Tom’s death. This is going to turn our entire lives upside down again.”

  Thoughtfully studying her, Gavin gazed into wide, pleading green eyes and knew instantly, that he’d never be able to deny her this request.

  “Alright Olivia, we’ll deliver them to Ron on January first, together.” Tears fell silently as she shook her head in agreement and then opened the folder to peruse its contents.

  Chapter Twelve

  The final two weeks prior to Christmas literally flew by. As the boys were preparing for their last day of school before Christmas break, they were practically bouncing off the walls in anticipation.

  Gavin loved it, their enthusiasm was contagious.

  He returned from dropping them off at the bus stop, humming a Christmas carol, and had just closed the back door when the Olivia’s home telephone started ringing.

  “Can you please answer the phone?” she called down from the second floor.

  “Hello, this is the Jones’ residence,” he said, immediately recognizing the female caller and responding with affection clearly warming his voice.

  “Mom, it’s so good to hear from you. How did you know where to reach me?” Surprised to hear his own mother on the line, Gavin didn’t notice Olivia approach and ask him who it was.

  Noticing his pleased expression, she paused to listen curiously and was relieved to find out it was his mother. Funny, she’d never considered herself to be a jealous woman, but at the thought of another female seeking his attention she’d definitely recognized the ugly sensation. Feeling relief, Olivia smiled as he apologized for not calling for so long, then valiantly tried interrupting him when he’d informed his mother that he wouldn’t be home for Christmas this year. Not comfortable with his decision, Olivia tried to continue to verbally protest his choice not to return home until Gavin eventually lifted a finger to her lips and promptly pushed her out of the kitchen.

  “We’ll discuss this later,” she grumbled to herself, and then angrily marched up to the boys’ bedrooms to finish putting away the laundry.

  Upon hearing Gavin coming up the stairs, Olivia arched a brow as she hung up the last shirt. After shutting Luke and James’s closet door, she turned around and noticed him leaning against the doorway, watching her.

  “That was my Mom on the phone,” he explained with the hint of a smile.

  “I realized who it was when you called her Mom,” she sarcastically huffed out, trying to pass by him to leave the twins’ bedroom.

  “I’m sorry I scooted you out of the kitchen. I could tell you were upset.”

  He smothered a smile as he recalled the loud exaggerated sounds of her footsteps going up the staircase. There was never any second guessing if Olivia was angry.

  Angling her chin, she looked him directly in the eyes.

  “Please let me pass by you, Gavin. I’m not mad. I guess my feelings were just hurt. But as I put away the wash, I thought it over and realized I have no right to these feelings.”

  He studied her, his expression now puzzled.

  “I really don’t understand what it is you’re trying to say, Olivia.”

  “I don’t want to talk about it, now please move out of my way,” she demanded and used both hands to give him a hard shove against his chest.

  Gavin arched an eyebrow at her and grinned.

  “Sorry Olivia, you’ll have to do better than that,” he said, taking her by the arm to bring her up against the rock hard wall of his chest.

  I always have trouble thinking when he pulls me in like this, she thought as Gavin ran a hand up through her hair to gently tug her head back. His gaze never wavered as he lowered his lips down to meet hers.

  Heady warmth flooded her body. And then just as she was prepared to offer him more, he pulled his mouth away but held her where she was, curved comfortably against him, his hand still entangled in her hair.

  “Olivia, I want to know what in the world you were talking about. Right now!”

  Sighing, she gave in.

  Since she didn’t feel comfortable looking directly at him as she divulged the true reason for her feelings, she stared at the buttons on his shirt.

  “I guess I just thought that maybe you didn’t want your mother to know about me and the kids. I realize you decided to stay here because you’re a police officer and I know you made this decision because it’s part of your job…”

  The remainder of her sentence was cut off by Gavin’s mouth. It was rough and demanding as he allowed his pent up frustrations to ravage her.

  Then he jerked her free and gave her a small shake. Narrowly restrained fury caused his words to rush out as he let his temper flare.

  “You don’t get it do you? I’m here because I want to be here. I need to be here, Olivia. My decision to stay with you, at your house, has absolutely nothing to do with my job as a police officer. I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you. I need to know you’re safe. I…”

  Then he bit down hard on his own tongue, stunned.

  I just nearly blurted out that I love her. What was I thinking? I’ve only known her for about six weeks and here I am about to profess my love to her. Do I love her? Gavin wondered as he looked down at the woman he held in his arms and studied her face. How does she feel about me?

  Olivia smiled as she lifted her eyes back up to his and wrapped her arms around him, wanting to hold onto him.

  “I don’t even know anything about you or your family. I was afraid you didn’t want to share them with me.”

  Tenderly, he brushed the hair away from her face and gently took her by the hand, leading her down the stairs.

  As Olivia followed him, she berated herself. What am I doing? I’ve always said I didn’t want to become involved in any relationship until my boys were grown and on their own. What’s he expecting from me? What the heck am I doing?

  Gavin guided her into the family room and took a seat directly beside her on the couch, all the while continuing to hold her hand. With a disarming grin, he lifted her hand to his lips to kiss each one of the tips of her fingers.

  “You’re right, Olivia. You really know nothing about me. So I’ll start by telling you, I was born and raised in Pittsburgh. I moved here to Liberty, a little over three years ago when I accepted my position with the police force. My parents, Frank and Elsa Rafferty, they’ve just recently celebrated their forty third wedding anniversary. They’re best friends and still happily married, I might add. I have one
brother who’s three years younger than I am, his name is Ahron. And to be honest, I haven’t seen him in over four years. He’s never actually disclosed to us what his career is so I guess I’ve always assumed whatever he does is illegal and since I’m a cop that’s why his job has always been a secret. I’m sorry my Mom called me here, at your house. Ron was apparently compelled to share your home phone number with her. When I asked you to be quiet during my conversation, it wasn’t to hide you. It was because I wanted to break it to her, as quickly and painlessly as possible, that I wouldn’t be home for Christmas this year. I knew she was going to be really disappointed and I just wanted to get the conversation over and done with,” he said, sheepishly.

  His warm expression became a look of concern as Olivia’s eyes began filling with tears.

  “Oh Gavin, you can’t stay here now that you’ve told me all this. It’s breaking my heart. I fast forward my life twenty years and place myself in your mother’s shoes. I know without a doubt I’d want my children to come home and visit me. Please, you need to go call her and tell her you’ll be there.”

  She’d no sooner uttered her last word when his eyes turned violently dark. His words were spoken in a dangerously low voice.

  “Olivia, I can’t do that. I won’t do that. There’s no way on earth I could walk away and leave you alone at this point in time. You need to get that through your thick head.”

  He stood up and walked over to the fireplace located on the far wall of the family room. As he spoke with his back to her, he fiddled with a pewter candle stick on the mantel.

  “You don’t understand. I’ll never forget finding you, half naked, huddled in a corner on your kitchen floor. I can never erase the image of your face swollen and bruised, or your skin clawed open and bleeding.”

  He spun around to stare at her in disbelief, vehemently spewing out his words. “I will see this through to the end. The man threatened to kill you.”

  Olivia rose from the sofa and went to him. Lifting her hands, she placed them alongside Gavin’s face and cradled his fierce expression as she searched his eyes.

  “I know he did. But I’m feeling guilty because in my heart, I want you here with us. I feel safe with you.”

  She slid up on her tip toes to lightly kiss him.

  “I can’t thank you enough for the peace of mind you’ve given me these last few weeks.”

  Gathering her close he rested his chin on her hair thinking to himself, it eases my mind too.

  Suddenly she pulled away and narrowed her eyes, studying him.

  “Gavin, do your parents travel at all?”

  She didn’t even give him a chance to answer before excitedly relaying her idea.

  “They can come here. I’d love to have your parents come out for Christmas. They can stay the week if they’d like. Oh, please say you’ll give them a call. Actually, you know what? If you won’t call them, then I will.”

  Adding a slight pout to her lips, she began to lightly trail her fingers up and down his arm. He dropped his gaze down to enjoy the sight of her pretty pouting mouth and contemplated withholding his acceptance of the idea for a few more minutes.

  His greedy side won.

  “Olivia, it’s not possible. Yes, they do travel but where would they stay? I thought your Dad was arriving on Christmas Eve?” Gavin asked, hoping she wouldn’t see through his slightly over exaggerated tone of voice.

  She didn’t.

  And since Olivia was intent on having her way, she played right into his hands by easing her curvy body a little closer to his.

  “My Dad is coming,” she purred. “But he could sleep in the guest room and your parents could sleep in my room. It’s not a problem. It’s Christmas and families should be together.”

  It was then Gavin realized that even if he hadn’t already planned to agree with her suggestion from the start, he’d never have been able to argue with her now. Not when she was gazing up at him with a come and get it look in her eyes.

  Narrowing his gaze, he asked in a gravelly voice, “Where are we going to sleep, Olivia?”

  She offered him a dazzling, flirtatious smile.

  “Why right down here of course. There’s a sofa in the living room, I can sleep in there. You’ll sleep in here because this couch is much bigger. It’s a perfect idea! I’m sure you can behave yourself, Gavin. After all, my father and your parents will be right upstairs.”

  A low growl sounded in his throat as he dragged her against him again.

  “They aren’t here right now though, are they?”

  She started to laugh, pushing half heartedly against his shoulders.

  “Gavin, you need to go call your parents. I have too…”

  He’d withstood enough flirting and now wanted, no needed, to taste more. His hands which had been slowly encircling her waist began to explore the soft inviting line of her body. He leaned forward, his words spoken in a rough voice.

  “I want some of what you just offered me in exchange for my agreement.”

  Then he crushed his mouth to hers, allowing his hands free reign.

  Olivia responded by pulling him closer. She lightly nipped his lower lip, delighting in the taste of him.

  Gavin groaned as his lips followed the line of her jaw before traveling down to the hollow of her neck, tasting the sweet hollow of her throat.

  Why am I doing this to myself? He briefly wondered as he began sliding his hands under her shirt, lightly caressing her. Then decided he didn’t care if he was torturing himself. I finally know how her skin feels, became the one and only thought that raced through his mind.

  An intense flash of desire began entwining with searing heat, flaming and twisting, deliciously inside her, making Olivia realize sexual need can actually become quite painful. A gratifying moan escaped her parted lips as his hand closed over her breast and his fingertips began a sensual run over her, making her want him now.

  Regrettably, drawing as much willpower as she could muster, Olivia withdrew her mouth from his.

  “Gavin,” she barely rasped out. “Gavin, we need to stop. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

  He roughly gripped both her upper arms to further enable her retreat and fixed his smoldering gaze on hers.

  “Olivia, I want you. There’s no doubt in either of our minds about that. I don’t know how much more of this I can take.”

  Quite frankly, she wasn’t sure how much more she’d be able to take either.

  “I think it’ll best if we just don’t touch each other. Each time we do it becomes harder for me to back away,” she said and ran her tongue over her lips, still tasting him. “I’m starting to get scared that I won’t be able to turn away from you. I feel it, Gavin. I feel the intense heat between us. I really do. I know how frustrated you must be feeling.”

  As Gavin stared at her, he tried to compose his thoughts. When he finally did, he gave her a searing look from head to toe.

  “I believe you do understand this frustration, Olivia. But don’t worry , I can’t touch you like that again. I don’t know how much more self control I have left either.”

  He flashed a disarming grin.

  “I’ll go give my parents a call right now. I think it will be best if we have extra people in the house.” A wicked gleam flickered in his eyes. “Don’t you?”

  She only nodded in agreement.

  “I think we should do the tree hike today after the boys get home from their half day of school,” he said. “Knowing my mother, she’ll probably show up here by nine o’clock tomorrow morning.”

  Olivia smiled and started to reach for him, but then thought better of it and decided it was best to drop her hand.

  “I like that idea, Gavin. We’ll all go today.”

  Excited to tell the boys about the hike, they drove down to the bus stop, together. As they waited for the bus, Olivia slid out to retrieve the mail. Shivering, she jumped back into the car and began ripping open Christmas cards.

  “We’re really going to have to b
undle up this afternoon,” she absently commented.

  Gavin sat beside her, looking out the window, lost in his own thoughts.

  He was seriously considering asking Olivia to marry him. But was it for the right reasons? He asked himself silently. I mean it’s not only based on my desire for her. What I feel for her and the kids is already so much more than I’ve ever experienced in the past for anyone else. So why not? My own parents have been married for over forty years and they only knew each other for three months prior to their wedding.

  Olivia’s sharp inhalation of breath caused Gavin’s head to snap toward her as he asked, “What is it?”

  Her face, now pale, looked stricken as she stared at a jovial Santa Claus which was smiling on the front of one of the Christmas cards she was holding. Her hands were trembling, uncontrollably.

  Gavin, seeing her distress, promptly reached over and took it from her. From the outside it looked like a traditional holiday greeting card.

  However, the inside of the card menacingly read, I will see you very soon, Mrs. Jones.

  “It’s from him. I know it’s from him,” she stammered before turning her face away as she tried to compose herself. Not arguing with her, Gavin immediately started searching through the numerous cards and torn envelopes lying upon her lap.

  “Which envelope did this card arrive in?” he impatiently demanded.

  Olivia glanced over at him.

  “I don’t know,” she snapped. “I was just tearing them open and enjoying them when I happened to rip open this one. Give me a minute to gather my wits again. There are only five cards here. Let me figure out which envelope doesn’t have a familiar address.”

  Nervously biting her lower lip, she began scanning the torn envelopes.

  “Oh Gavin,” she gasped. “This one doesn’t have a return address or any post office markings at all. This means he probably placed it in the mailbox himself.”