Haunted by Your Touch

by Frost, Jeaniene; Kohler, Sharie

  Raiden paced the airy room. “You went to the hospital before he took you to the office?” At her nod, he went on. “We must find that building. Perhaps he left something there.”

  “But what?” She shrugged. “Why would Mathias have a sudden interest in a human baby girl born over twenty-five years ago?”

  “I don’t know. But if there’s a connection, I’m going to find it. And deal with it. Mathias isn’t coming near you ever again.”

  Chapter Five

  Raiden made a call to Bram in low, secretive tones that infuriated her. This was about her family and her future. Did he really think he was going to keep her in the dark?

  When he rang off and turned to leave, she grabbed him by the shirt. “I’m going with you.”

  He shook his head. “Too dangerous.”

  “That’s what you’ve decided?” she asked tartly.

  Raiden sent her a wary glance. “I have.”

  “Too bad for you, then. You’re not my mate.” She shrugged. “You’ve no right to decide anything for me.”

  His icy blue eyes narrowed. “The child you carry is mine. I have every right to care about your well-being.”

  “Care, yes. Decide, no. Either I go with you or I resume this search alone. If Bram Rion knew that easily how to find the office my father most likely visited, then someone else will as well. Unlike you, I’m more likely to have privileges to enter, given that I’m his next of kin. What reason will you use to access his paperwork?”

  Raiden clenched his jaw. “Bram is a member of the Council. I’m sure he can pull a few strings for me.”

  He was right, Tabitha realized. In fact, they both were. Between his connections and her familial relation, they should have no trouble viewing whatever her father might have kept in the building.

  “Should we be wasting time arguing about this, or should we be working together? What could happen, really? It’s a Council building in the middle of the day. Others should be there. We’re doing nothing wrong.”

  Raiden hesitated, looking like he was about to refuse.

  “Hello?” Nathanial Wolvesey called.

  Tabitha shivered. Raiden’s father had looked at her all too sexually, given that she carried his son’s child.

  Raiden watched her with an unblinking gaze. “What’s the matter? Did my father say something to you that made you uncomfortable?”

  A ginger brow rose. “Merely that he understood why you desired me so much. Then he assured me the two of you had passed a woman or two between you over the decades.”

  He winced. “Bloody hell.”

  Tabitha didn’t ask if Nathanial had been lying. The truth was all over Raiden’s face, and pain bulldozed her. He had treated women like interchangeable playthings. Convenient energy sources. Likely still did.

  “He said that you wouldn’t mind if I allowed him to—”

  “I mind. A great deal.” He clenched his teeth but met her gaze without flinching. “I’m sorry.”

  Sorry for the behavior or sorry his father had revealed the truth to her? She shoved the thought away. “I politely refused, in case you’re wondering. But I won’t be alone with him again.”

  “Hello?” Nathanial’s footsteps across the gleaming hardwood floors came closer.

  Raiden didn’t hesitate. He grabbed her hand. “Let’s go.”

  As always with teleporting, a loud sucking noise filled her ears. Then eerie silence. Suddenly, she lost her balance, and a sense of tumbling through air overwhelmed her. The weightlessness, the not knowing which way was up and which was down, made her slightly ill.

  A moment later, they stood outside a neo-modern office building. Built in the 1960s and topping off at about five stories, the concrete structure had been carved with magical runes between each tier of white-draped windows. There wasn’t a soul in sight.

  “It looks abandoned.” Eerily so, in fact.

  He frowned, grabbing her hand tighter. “Indeed. Bram speculated that the Council ministries no longer use this building. Apparently, it’s been the source of human speculation, particularly the meaning of the runes.”

  “I recognize some of the symbols. Magic, mastery, truth, Fate. Death.”

  Raiden shrugged, his wide shoulders looking almost menacing in a dark trench. “We don’t have time to decipher it now. I have an uneasy feeling. Let’s move quickly. I don’t want you out in the open where you’re vulnerable to Mathias or any eyes he might have watching.”

  “He likely has no idea where I am.”

  He hustled her under the building’s portico, deep in shadow, and pinned her with a glare. “Do you really think it would take Mathias very long to figure out that your father had a daughter he hadn’t managed to kill in the attack? And that the daughter carried my child? Once he pieces all the information together, he’s going to be but a breath behind us.”

  Dear God, she’d never thought of that before, but her father would have recorded her own birth. There would be no mating listed in The Peers and People of Magickind because she’d never mated. The fact that she carried Raiden’s child wouldn’t be listed until the youngling’s birth, but even so, a wizard with Mathias’s cunning and resources could find that information. After all, he hadn’t managed to outwit most of the Council and stay a step ahead of the Doomsday Brethren by being a half-wit.

  “Fuck.” Raiden ran a hand through his long, pale hair. “And once he starts pursuing us, I know where he’ll look first. We can’t go back to your house. Or mine.”

  “You’re right.”

  “I’ll tell Ronan to warn my father away until this is settled. He won’t be happy, but if we can find what we’re looking for now, then I can set all back to rights soon.”

  “Meaning your father can go home, and you can wash your hands of me by dumping me on Sean Blackbourne’s doorstep?”

  His face tightened, darkened. Raiden’s temper wasn’t a small thing, and she wondered if she’d crossed some line.

  He cursed and turned away. “That would be for the best.”

  “For whom?” she challenged, furious to the bone with his oblique answers. “It would certainly be easiest for you. Then you could rid yourself of me, guilt-free and—”

  Raiden grabbed her and pulled her close. “Listen to me. I have tried every way I know to spare you more heartache. I was a bastard to you, yes. I seduced you with every intention of walking out the door. I don’t mate. I am my father’s son.”

  “I refuse to believe that.” Tabitha shook her head.

  “I’m trying to do the right thing now. Instead of seducing you again, I’m warning you away. Which do you think I’d rather do?” He raised a golden brow, his hot gaze wandering down her body.

  She flushed hot and tingly. “You held me with such tenderness. The way you made me feel so secure and whispered to me when we were together was—”

  “Designed to separate a pretty female from her knickers.” He forced himself to be brutally honest. “It’s a skill I’ve spent decades perfecting. Your parents knew this when they threatened me out of your life.”

  She blinked, her hazel green eyes wide and astounded. “Threatened you?”

  “To step aside or have the Council elder, your mate-to-be’s uncle, censure and incarcerate me until you were happily mated.”

  That would have left the Doomsday Brethren fighting with one less warrior. Had Raiden allowed that to happen, he might as well have signed his own twin’s death warrant—along with those of the other Doomsday Brethren. They’d already been woefully outmanned. He hadn’t wanted to leave Tabby, though he hadn’t believed for one moment that he would have made a genteel witch like her happy. His desires ran deep, dark. He’d barely begun to unleash his wants on her. Eventually, he would have shocked her, and she would have realized what her parents already knew: he wasn’t good enough for her.

  “You didn’t fight for me at all.” She didn’t ask because she knew the answer, but the hurt in her voice made Raiden bleed inside.

  “No.�
�� In good conscience, how could he?

  Tabby stepped back, a protective hand over the gentle swell of her belly. Shielding their baby from him. Pain at that realization gouged his chest and nearly took him to his knees. Raiden forced himself to swallow and send her a stare of cold challenge.

  “Why are you helping me now? Because of the baby?” she asked.

  God, she looked ready to break into a thousand pieces, and Raiden couldn’t stand to heap more pain on her. His gaze softened. “I’m not cruel. You and the baby matter. It would devastate me to see Mathias hurt you. And if you remain near me, he’d certainly try. Besides, I’m simply not built for commitment. The sooner you accept that, the happier you’ll be.”

  She stared at him as if he were a stranger, her eyes wary and tear-filled. “Then you’re right. We should find whatever is in this building quickly so we can part ways.”

  Without another word, she tried the door. It didn’t budge.

  “Drat!”

  Bram had given him the heads-up on accessing these buildings, once used by Council officials and their ministers. Raiden closed his eyes and chanted the spell Bram had provided, then coupled it with his own ability to sense other beings near.

  Seconds later, the latch in Tabby’s hand clicked. She blinked and pushed the door open. “How did you do that?”

  He shook his head, sensing they weren’t the only people here and praying Mathias wasn’t already hot on their tails.

  “Quiet. We’re not alone,” he whispered. “Let’s go.”

  Raiden led them away from the nearby encroachers, tiptoeing up the stairs with Tabby’s hand in his. Once they’d started up the stairs, she squeezed his hand. He turned to her.

  “This is familiar,” she whispered with an unblinking stare. “I remember being here.”

  He took her shoulders in his grasp. “Do you remember exactly how to reach your father’s office?”

  She frowned, as if trying to sort through her memories. “I’ll try. I know we walked up several flights of stairs, through a big brown door. There was a reception area with lots of colorful tiles…”

  For all he knew, every floor looked that way, but he smiled encouragingly. “We’ll keep going and see if anything looks right to you.”

  They ascended another flight of stairs. When they peered out the door from the stairwell to the offices, she shook her head. They repeated the process with the same results. On the fourth floor, she nodded emphatically.

  “My father’s office was on the other side of the fountain, near the tiles shaped like the rune for Truth, a giant Y-looking symbol.”

  She raced across the floor before he could stop her. Thankfully, the building’s other occupants, whoever they were, hadn’t come this way—yet. Raiden prayed it remained thus. He needed to keep Tabitha safe, help her protect the tree her father had been willing to die for, then get her out of his life. Because God help him, with every moment he stayed near her, Raiden wanted nothing more than to grab her, kiss her, remember every perfect, lush curve, retrace them with his hands, his mouth. Keep her close always.

  She tiptoed across the tiled floor quietly, then reached for the door. Raiden closed the space between them with a blink and clapped his hand over hers, staying her.

  “Let me,” he demanded. He sensed no one inside… but he couldn’t be too careful where Tabby was concerned.

  She stepped aside. “Be careful. Please.”

  And just like that, she undid his good intentions of keeping his distance. Even when he was a bastard to her, she goddamn cared. How was a man who’d never known genuine feelings supposed to do without them once he’d found them? It would be like living without sunlight.

  Was he doing the right thing in letting her go?

  For a moment, Raiden closed his eyes and sorted through the cacophony in his head, which was clashing with all the clatter in his heart. But at the end of the day, he still didn’t know if he was capable of caring for one woman for the rest of his life. Was it fair to risk her to try and learn to love? No. He’d be putting his own desire for her above her safety. Mathias or the Anarki could kill him tomorrow and leave her mateless and mourning. Or she could become a target in her own right.

  He would have to accept that as much as he desired Tabby above all others, he would be doing her a disservice to let her believe they had a future.

  “Is something wrong?” she asked. “Is someone inside?”

  Her questions brought him out of his reverie. “No.”

  Raiden shoved the door open to reveal a fairly standard, if outdated, office. A clunky desk with a fake wood-grain top and chrome legs. A phone. Empty file folders. A picture frame. A plant, curiously alive.

  “Does this look familiar?” he asked her.

  But when he turned, she was rushing into the room and lifting the picture frame. Tears filled her eyes, ran down her cheeks. “Daddy and Mum. Winston and James. I can’t believe they’re truly gone.”

  Looking so lost and alone, Tabby met his gaze across the room. Raiden couldn’t stand it; he closed the distance between them and grabbed her up in his arms.

  Chapter Six

  Tabitha felt Raiden’s strong arms encircle her protectively. Like a life preserver in a sea of drowning grief, he alone kept her afloat.

  She shoved aside the ugly thought that he’d soon leave her.

  Wiping her tears away with impatient hands, she pushed out of his embrace. “Sorry. I know we don’t have time for this now. We should look in the desk—”

  Raiden didn’t let her move more than a meter away. “You’ve suffered an incredible loss, Tabby.”

  “Tabitha,” she reminded him through gritted teeth.

  He stifled a curse. “And you’ve been so strong since the attack. If you need to lean on me, do.”

  And what, he would be here for her? She studied him, trying to discern the answer. But she couldn’t. His face appeared like granite, ungiving. Yet his blue eyes radiated warmth, life. The picture of compassion. Would he be here for her today? If today, why not tomorrow?

  Because he pitied her, not loved her. God, what a bitter pill to swallow.

  “I’ll be fine.”

  But she lied. Her hands shook as she set the picture down on the desk. She didn’t quite manage to balance it, and the metal frame clattered onto the desktop. Sadness and frustration crashed down on her as the loss struck her all over again. Angry tears flooded her eyes, poured onto her cheeks.

  Raiden cursed, grabbing her by the shoulders. “That’s it. I admit that I’ve been a bastard, and I’m probably the last person in the world you want comforting you. But I’ll be damned if I’m going to watch you bleed inside and do nothing. Don’t shut me out if you need to cry.”

  She did need it. Tabitha hated to admit it, but shoving all her shock and grief down for the past day had finally caught up with her. But if she burdened him more, he’d only leave faster. He wanted nothing to do with emotion or commitment, and taking advantage of his momentary compassion would only hurt more when he left.

  She looked down, tried to hide her crumbling expression from him. Raiden was having none of that.

  As the first sob wracked her, he lifted her chin and stared into her tear-filled eyes. Tabitha averted her gaze, but she knew he saw right through her.

  Raiden knew her so damn well. Knew her… and simply didn’t love her the way she loved him.

  With a curse, Raiden crushed her against his chest. The steady beat of his heart under her ear was both a joy and a sorrow. Needing Raiden too much to push him away, Tabitha clung to him, throwing her arms around his neck and burrowing closer.

  “Raiden…”

  A moment later, he brushed the tears from her face and cupped her cheeks, his blue gaze penetrating hers, open and full of a thousand emotions.

  Tabitha caught her breath. She’d seen Raiden with many expressions, but in nearly every one, the windows to his soul had been closed to her. Hot, challenging, alluring, yes. But never revealing, stark. Haunted.
Like now.

  He lowered his head, slowly, so that she could stop him at any time. But stopping him was the last thing she wanted. Her heart thumped so hard that it threatened to beat out of her chest.

  Raiden did this every time he touched her. She couldn’t absorb the rush of feelings and sensations quickly enough. He always took her to a new place, and she knew, even without a wizard’s mating instinct, that he was the mate of her heart.

  Too bad that he lacked the instinct—or love—to believe she was his mate as well.

  The first brush of his lips over hers pushed those thoughts aside. He lingered, breathed, urged her to open. Then he waited until she was breathless, on her tiptoes, silently begging as she grabbed his shoulders and pressed closer. Suddenly, he was deep inside her mouth, stealing her sanity, reclaiming her soul. That familiar taste of his haunted her, so male. So Raiden. So irresistible.

  With a moan, she opened more to his kiss, and he sampled gently… yet took in that subtly commanding way of his.

  Unable to remember why she shouldn’t, Tabitha ran her fingers over the hard breadth of his shoulders, caressed her way across his chest. Raiden gripped her hips and pressed closer, demanding. He was so solid—in every way. He was her something to hang on to. Her safe harbor in a raging sea.

  “I’m here, Tabby,” he murmured against her lips. “I’ll help you. I’ll keep you safe.”

  Before she could object, his lips lowered to her neck. She gasped at the electric sensation of his breath feathering over her sensitive skin, his lips claiming the flesh he’d claimed so many times before… but with a new urgency she’d never sensed. A new possessiveness. She rolled her head to the side, allowing him all the access to her that he craved.

  One hand left her hip to caress its way up her waist, her rib cage, the sensitive side of her breast. When she gasped into his ear, he murmured, “That’s it, Tabby. Don’t do anything but feel me. Let me take your pain and give you pleasure.”