Filthy Commitments: A Submissives’ Secrets Novel

by Michelle Love

  ‘Tilt your hips up, baby,’ he whispered and she complied, moaning as he slid into her, oh-so-slowly.

  ‘Christ, you make me so hard when you make that sound, beautiful…’ He thrust deep, rubbing her clit as he did, feeling her damp thighs quiver, her body damp with sweat. So turned on were they both, that they came quickly and collapsed together, dragging great lungfuls of air into their exhausted bodies.

  Jess grinned at him. ‘Man, you’re really good at that.’

  Theo laughed. ‘I’m only good ‘because you make me good, woman.’

  Jess rolled onto her side and looked down at him. ‘I have a confession.’ She tried to keep her voice light but Theo could see something else in her eyes. He reached up to cup her cheek in his palm.

  ‘You can tell me anything.’

  Jess hesitated. ‘I wasn’t a virgin when we met but… I’ve never had sex with a man I loved… before you.’

  That floored and horrified him at the same time. She was telling him what Jules had done to her. She was confirming it. His chest began to hurt.

  ‘I wasn’t sure I would ever want to be physical with someone… until that day at Commencement. As soon as I saw you, I got this rush of feelings I never knew I was capable of.’

  He studied her face. ‘Are you okay?’

  She nodded. ‘Yeah. I think I am.’

  ‘Don’t be scared, baby.’

  She smiled at him. ‘I’m not. I’m mad. I’m pissed that I was denied this for so long.’

  He grinned. ‘Good.’ He moved his body onto her hers. ‘Gotta tell ya, woman, you’re hot when you’re angry. Sorta like the anti-Hulk.’

  ‘Smooth.’

  He laughed and starting kissing her neck. She ran her hands over his arms, down his back, over his buttocks. She tightened her arms around him, wrapped her legs around his hips.

  ‘Theo?’

  ‘Yeah, darlin’?’

  In the moonlight he looked so much younger, his big green eyes on hers, his easy smile. She thought he had never been so handsome as he was this night. She smoothed his cheeks with her thumbs.

  ‘I love you.’

  He kissed her, crushing his mouth against his. ‘I love you too, baby. Just me and you now. For all time.’

  She smiled but her eyes were sad. ‘Make the world go away, Theo.’

  He pressed his lips to her forehead, kissing away the crease and ran his hand down her stomach. ‘Anything for you, darlin’. Anything.’

  He gathered her to him and they made love for the rest of the night.

  The girl he’d picked up at the club unzipped his pants and bent over him.

  Jules leaned back and relaxed while she worked on him, touched her red hair as her mouth enveloped his cock. He closed his eyes and imagined darker hair, darker skin, a sweeter touch. When he was almost there, he pushed the girl back to the floor and thrust into her, ignoring her little cry of pain. She had Jessica’s face and he was fucking her hard, punishing, a raging hatred and lust inside him. He wanted to kill her for sharing their little secret with that fucker. Scratch that, he just wanted to kill her, period.

  But an idea had come to him earlier, as he drank one drink after another, and now he was certain it hadn’t been Jessica who blabbed to Storm or Max Zeigler. It was someone else, someone who he’d thought would never betray him or the memory of his father. Someone who should know better.

  Jules had gotten drunker when he realised what he had to do and now, fucking this girl whose name he hadn’t bothered to learn, he forgot about that and instead imagined he was Theo, with Jessica in his arms, and as he imagined her skin against his, he came, grunting and sobbing until he was exhausted.

  ‘I refuse to go. I say to thee, sir, I refuse.’

  Theo started laughing as Jess pouted on as Theo started to pack. It was their last full day before flying back to Seattle at an ungodly hour the next morning. He leaned over and kissed her.

  ‘Beautiful, nothing would make me happier than to stay here forever with you. However, to pay for this haven, I have to work. We still have tonight to enjoy.’

  Jess sighed and dragged her case over to the bed. ‘And I have to look for another job.’

  They packed in silence for a while before Theo, with uncharacteristic shyness, spoke.

  ‘You don’t have to. Work, I mean. I’m not trying to be… but, you know, you could finish your Ph.D., concentrate on that, take some time to figure out what you want to do next. You have a big brain, you could do anything.’

  Jess’s face was blank. ‘Theo, I have to pay my way. I love you but unless it is occasional treats like this place, I wouldn’t feel right. It’s my responsibility, not yours.’

  Theo felt stung. ‘Jess, I never want you to think I’m trying to run your life for you. I’m not Jules.’

  Distress crossed her lovely face and tears sprung to her eyes. She dashed them away impatiently. ‘I know that.’ Her voice was thick and he wanted to reach for her, but her body had tensed and he felt the distance between them.

  ‘Jess… I’m just saying, take some breathing space. You deserve it.’

  ‘Can we talk about this later?’

  Theo sighed inwardly. God, the damage Jules had done to her that she couldn’t accept any kindness. ‘Sure.’

  They packed a little more, in silence, then Jess slipped from the room.

  He found her looking out at the ocean. He slid his arms around her, relieved when she leaned into his embrace.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ she said softly, ‘I’m an idiot. I know you were trying to help and it’s incredibly generous. I just don’t want to be one of ‘those’ women.’

  He turned her to him and took her face in his hands. ‘You will never be that kind of woman, you will never be the type of woman who sees men like me as a meal ticket. It’s not in you. I do get it, you know, I really do. Can we talk about this seriously, as a business venture for both of us, when we get back?’

  Jess hesitated then nodded.

  ‘Good.’ He pressed his lips to hers. ‘Now…let’s change the subject.’ He dropped to his knees and pushed her dress up to her waist, bunching the fabric at her hip with one hand, pulling her panties down with the other. He lifted one of her golden brown legs over his shoulder and began to kiss her belly, moving down to her sex. Jess leaned back against the wall and sighed, knotting her fingers in his hair.

  He made her come twice before standing, and she reached for him immediately, freeing his cock and dropping gently to her knees. She smiled up at him.

  ‘My turn…and Theo?’

  ‘Yes, baby?’

  ‘I need some dirty talk…’ Theo chuckled at her wicked grin and as she took him into her mouth, the lush velvety softness of her hot mouth, her gentle lips around his cock felt so good that he had no trouble telling her what he wanted.

  ‘You feel so good baby, your beautiful mouth on me, you make me want to come and come, to fill you with my cock….’

  She began to stroke her hands up and down his shaft, pulling gently down on the skin so her tongue could get to all the sensitive points on his cock. Theo’s eyes closed, experiencing every second of pleasure.

  ‘After I’ve come, beautiful, I’m going to take you into my bed and fuck you for hours and hours until you’re so exhausted, you’ll beg me to stop. I’ll fuck your angel mouth, your heavenly cunt, so juicy and wet for me…’

  He could tell by her breathing that she was hot for him, her breasts heaving. ‘God, I want to taste you so bad right now…’

  Jess sucked him, her hands on his buttocks, her nails digging into him and he came, shouting his love for her as he pumped into her eager mouth. He scooped her into his arms as he struggled to catch his breath and she kissed him, her eyes wild with arousal.

  ‘Fuck me against the wall… from behind… hard,’ she ordered and he almost slammed her against the wall, parting her legs with his foot and thrusting into her ready, sodden cunt, pressing her hands above her against the wall.

  ‘
You wanna be fucked all night, pretty girl?’ he murmured in her ear as he screwed her almost violently and she nodded, her skin glowing with sweat. His hand reached around to rub her clit, feeling it harden and pulse against his fingertips. ‘You’re all mine tonight, and I’m going to fuck you mercilessly.’

  She came quickly, moaning breathlessly. ‘Fuck me in the ass, Theo, please…’

  Pushing into her soft, tight ass, Theo struggled to control his own orgasm. His free hand circled her belly. He knew that drove her wild. God, this woman. They were made for each other, he knew that without a shadow of a doubt. She was his and he was hers…

  ‘This is forever, Jessie… you and me…’

  Shuddering and vibrating with pleasure they made love for the rest of the day into the early hours of the morning, falling asleep sated and delirious with happiness, and with the certainty that nothing, nothing would touch them now.

  A week later and Theo was wondering why Max was avoiding him. He tracked his best friend down to the cafeteria of the Stormfront HQ and cornered him just as Max was attacking a salad and looking very morose about it.

  Theo grinned, pulling a chair out opposite his friend. ‘Josh put you on another diet?’

  Max rolled his eyes. ‘He’s on it too, and making it look easy. He found my stash of Ding-dongs,’ he added with more than a little outrage, ‘and threw them out. Threw them out!’

  Theo laughed and took a long sip of his coffee. ‘Where’ve you been? I’ve hardly seen you since Jess and I got back. She wants to double-date and meet Josh, by the way.’

  Max nodded. ‘Sure, sounds good.’ There was a pause. ‘How is she?’

  Max’s question was obviously loaded and Theo squinted at his friend. ‘She’s good. Why are you asking?’

  ‘Just wondering if she’s had any more trouble with that asshole step-brother?’

  ‘Not that I know of. Max, what are you hiding?’

  Max sighed and shrugged. ‘I wasn’t sure if I should tell you but I met with Gachet.’

  Theo’s eyebrows shot up. ‘What? Max…’

  ‘He’s toxic, Theo, he’s dangerous. I spoke to the housekeeper at the Gachet mansion, the place Jess grew up. She more or less told me that Jules had been molesting Jess from when she was young. Very young. I didn’t want to ruin your holiday or bring up painful memories for Jess so I arrange to meet him.’ The words were flooding out of Max now. ‘Something need to be done, something to try and stop what he’s doing, something to let him know that Jess is protected now.’

  ‘What happened?’

  ‘When?’

  ‘When you met Gachet.’

  Max looked Theo dead in the eye, his gaze confident. ‘I threatened him. Told him if he knew what was good for him, he’d renounce all claim on Jess and her rightful inheritance. Told him his manipulation and bullying of her stops now or we would go to the authorities.’

  Theo got the feeling Max wasn’t telling him everything but instead of being angry, he was grateful for his friend. Unbelievably moved that his very best friend would go to bat for the woman he loved. Theo nodded, smiled and could see the relief in Max’s eyes.

  ‘Thank you, buddy,’ Theo said softly, ‘I mean it. Well, we’ll see what his next move is. He won’t get near Jess again, that’s for damn sure.’

  ‘How is she, really?’

  Theo hesitated. ‘Best if we don’t tell her about this. For now. Keep this between the two of us.’

  Max nodded. ‘Deal.’ The two men silent for a long moment then Max shook his head. ‘Man, the things men do to women.’

  Theo had no answer to that.

  Camilla tugged her coat around her as the Seattle skies opened with a vengeance. The car was parked all the way over on Fifth and now she wished she’d ordered her clothes from the internet rather than go shopping in this monsoon. The evening had crept up on her, her much-longed-for day off was coming to an end and she was exhausted. She walked quickly to the parking garage and got the lift to her level.

  He grabbed her as soon as she exited the lift. Camilla felt her body being lifted and slammed down to the hard concrete of the floor and a man bent over her. In the dim light and through her fear, she couldn’t make out who it was – until he spoke.

  ‘You shouldn’t have opened your big mouth, Camilla. It won’t save Jessica and it won’t save you.’

  Camilla had no time to scream before her killer cut her throat.

  Jess was waiting for him when he got back to the apartment and Theo realized how much he loved that she was there. She had an old t-shirt on and raggedy jeans and looked about nineteen.

  ‘Hey pretty girl,’ Theo pulled his tie off as she came to him, standing on her tip-toes to kiss him hello.

  ‘Hey, gorgeous. I hope you’re hungry, I’ve been making my signature mac-and-cheese.’

  ‘From the box?’

  ‘You bet your ass,’ and she laughed. Theo tightened his arms around her, nuzzling her neck.

  ‘You smell so good,’ he murmured and felt her chuckle.

  ‘If cheese sauce is your thing,’ she replied but kissed him tenderly. ‘Why don’t you grab a shower, dinner will be about twenty minutes.’

  ‘Twenty minutes huh?’ and she grinned, knowing what he wanted. She pulled her t-shirt over her head.

  ‘Fuck me quick then, soldier,’ and she skipped away from him, laughing. Theo shook his head in mock disapproval.

  ‘I’ve turned you into a wanton woman, Jessica Wood,’ but within seconds they were naked in his shower, and he was lifting her so he could plunge inside her.

  After, they ate their pasta in front the television with Jess in her underwear, Theo in just a pair of jog pants. Theo grinned over at her as she dropped her food.

  ‘You have mac-and-cheese.on your belly,’ he waggled his eyebrows, ‘lucky mac-and-cheese.’ He leaned over and scooped up the food with his mouth, kissing the soft skin of her stomach, making her giggle.

  ‘Loon,’ she swiped her hand at his head then started as her cell-phone rang. She grinned at him as she answered the call.

  ‘Yes? This is she?’

  Theo watched the expression on her lovely face changed from happiness to confusion to horror. Jess drew in a shaky breath and she looked away from Theo. He frowned, wondering if Jules was up to his old tricks again. She’d changed her number but who knew how far Jules would go to hound her.

  ‘When?’ Jess’ voice broke and immediately Theo took her in his arms. Jess was trembling violently.

  ‘Yes. Yes, of course, I’ll be here, please come over as soon as you can.’

  Not Jules then, Theo realized with relief but the look on Jess’s face haunted him. Despair. Disbelief. Grief.

  She ended the call and gazed at him with eyes full of bottomless horror and sorrow.

  ‘What is it, love? What’s wrong?’

  ‘That was the police. They’re coming over to interview me. God, Theo… it’s Camilla… they found her in a parking lot on Fifth an hour ago,’ she said in a broken voice and Theo’s heart broke for her. ‘She’s dead, Theo. She’s been murdered. Oh god, oh god, please, no…’

  Theo held her tightly as she sobbed, aching for her but in his head, a voice repeating the same four words over and over. This is your fault.

  Oh god, he thought, Max, what have we done…?

  Fight With Me Part Five

  Jessica Wood nodded once at the medical examiner’s aide. ‘Yes, that’s Camilla Amotte.’ She couldn’t take her eyes off the dead woman’s face, so peaceful and serene showing no signs of the violence of her death. The coroner had deliberately covered her neck, the deep horrific gash, but Jess could still see bruising. She felt numb. After the past few days when she felt like screaming day and night, now she was exhausted, resigned. Camilla, her beloved, lovely Camilla, was gone and Jess knew, without a doubt, that Jules had killed her.

  The police had told her there was no physical evidence to go on and Jules had provided them with a seemingly watertight alibi.

/>   ‘It’s my fault,’ she’d said to Theo that first night when he’d held her as she sobbed her heart out.

  ‘No, no, no…’ He’d rocked her gently as he reassured her but she would not be told otherwise.

  Now, as she took a waiting Theo’s hand and they walked out of the antiseptic stink of the morgue into bright Seattle sunshine, she turned to him, leaned against him.

  ‘Theo, I feel like I need to go away for a while. Out of the city, clear my head.’

  Theo stroked her face. ‘We can go anywhere you want, sweetheart. Just ask.’

  She pulled away slightly. ‘I meant… on my own. No,’ she added quickly after seeing the hurt on his face, ‘I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be hurtful, just for a few days.’ She gave him a weak smile. ‘I really do need to clear my head and you, Theo Storm, are a big distraction. I need to figure out what to do workwise and how I can go forward. I know you’ve told me not to worry about money but it wouldn’t sit right with me, living off you. It’s just not me.’

  Theo was silent for a moment, his eyes intense on hers then they softened and he smiled slightly. ‘I get it. But look, just so I don’t go crazy wondering if you’re safe, I have a cabin down in Oregon, on the Santiam River. It’s secluded but not isolated. Very chill.’

  Jess nodded gratefully. ‘That would be heaven, thank you. And maybe after a few days, if you can spare the time…?’

  Theo pulled her into his arms. ‘Always for you, Jessie.’

  At breakfast, Jules Gachet looked through the resumes of the new housekeeper candidates. He was bored with this process but hey, he realised, it’s all of your doing. He could imagine Jessica’s grief, her guilt and it made him smile.