Fools Who Dream

by Alex Pitt

  As her dad opened the door and I greeted him formerly, I was the happiest I could ever have been. If only that feeling had lasted.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Daisy’s mum didn’t look good at all. She was deathly pale and her lips were blue, but they managed to stretch to a thin smile when she opened her eyes and saw her daughter approaching. She still had most of her hair attached to her scalp but, heartbreakingly, it wouldn’t last forever.

  Mr Mulligan had placed the flowers in a vase, and I put them on the table next to his wife. He hated seeing her like this, but he’d tried to keep it together when answering the door. Mrs Mulligan looked at the flowers, and then at me.

  “Mum, this is Jack. My boyfriend,” Daisy introduced me.

  “Hey, Jack,” she whispered. Her voice was dry.

  “Here, drink some of this,” and Daisy lifted a glass of water to her lips. She gulped once, twice, three times, then she’d had enough.

  “Thanks sweetheart,” she smiled. “It’s nice to meet you at last, Jack. Daisy speaks very highly of you.”

  “Does she?” I asked, looking at Daisy, who’d flushed a bright red colour.

  “I’m going to marry him one day, were her exact words, I believe.”

  I looked bewildered at Daisy for a moment, thinking this was a big step already, we’d only got together last night, and then I caught both of their faces and I realised she was joking. Laughing, partly at the joke and partly at my own stupidity, I knelt down next to Daisy and patted her mum’s hand.

  “I’m sorry to hear about your condition. It’s nice to meet you though,” I told her, with complete sincerity.

  “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.”

  She smiled as she said this, and Daisy smiled back. It was then that I realised where she got her charm from. Her looks, too. Both of her parents were good looking folks, and I felt awfully sorry for them all.

  “I’ll refill your water, Mum,” Daisy announced, picking the glass back up and heading to the door. “Why don’t you two get to know each other?” She grinned one last time, and then left the room.

  “Are you happy with Daisy?” Mrs Mulligan asked, after a minute of complete silence.

  “Of course. I’ve never been happier. She’s amazing.”

  “She is. She really is. But Jack, there’s something I want you to promise me,” Mrs Mulligan whispered, and I leant in close.

  “What’s that?” I asked, scared of what her demands would be.

  “Look after my girl, will you? She’s been through the shitter recently. I hope you don’t mind me using that word,” and I waved a hand, brushing it away. “Good, because she really has. She needs someone in her life, someone like you, someone her own age who can look after her. Me and her father are doing what we can, but it’s not enough. She needs you.”

  “What happened to her?” I questioned simply, praying that she’d tell me.

  I wasn’t sure if Daisy would be happy knowing that her mum had told me the big secret, but I absolutely had to know. Daisy would tell me when she was ready, be it a year, or two years, or even three years, and I respected Daisy, but I had to know. It was important to me, so I could be there for her.

  “If she hasn’t told you, I don’t think I can. She will when she’s ready though,” and it was already the same crap I’d heard coming out of her daughter’s mouth.

  Daisy came back a minute later, holding the water, not sure whether she should come in or not. I’m sure we looked like we were having a deep conversation, but we weren’t. I wanted to know what her secret was, Mrs Mulligan wouldn’t tell me. It was as simple as that.

  Lifting one hand off the sofa, she beckoned Daisy forward.

  “It’s nice that you’re getting along,” Daisy told us both, placing a hand on my shoulder and handing the water to her mother.

  “We are, sweetie. I’m sorry if you had plans today. I didn’t want you to change them for me.”

  “Mum, coming and seeing you was my concern. I couldn’t have gone out knowing you were like this. Besides, we were only going to the shops. I’ve got Jack here, which means a lot.”

  I squeezed her hand when she said that, and kissed it. I loved it when she spoke about me in that way. Looking back, I don’t know how things didn’t pan out differently. It makes no sense. She was happy, and I was happy, and everything should have been perfect.

  “Alright, well I’m OK, sweetie. Go out if you want to. Or stay here and take Jack to your room.”

  “Yeah, shall we do that?” Daisy looked quizzically at me, and I shrugged.

  That was more than fine with me, but I wanted her and her mum to be happy.

  “Go on, don’t mind me. And Jack,” she called back as we were leaving. “Thanks for the flowers.”

  “You’re welcome,” I smiled, and then we were heading upstairs.

  Daisy’s house was big, but not overly massive. There was just enough space for the three of them. There were paintings on the wall leading up the stairs, mostly of nice countryside, some of the sea and a lighthouse. The lighting was soft and there was an overall warm feeling to the house. It was obviously owned by people who cared for it, and people who cared for each other.

  “This is my room,” Daisy announced, as she opened a door upstairs and let me in. “Mum and Dad’s room is at the end, and the toilet is on the right.”

  Daisy’s bedroom was as cosy as the rest of the house. It was neat and tidy, with a double bed in the middle, a wardrobe the other side of it, and a desk to the left as we entered. College books were piled on there, obviously for the subjects she’d decided to take, and a lava lamp was behind them. She flicked the switch on the lamp, turning it on, and I picked up one of the books.

  “You’ve decided to take English?”

  “Yes,” she nodded. “It seems interesting. I think I’ll like it.”

  I smiled at that, but it didn’t make much difference to me. I was glad she found enjoyment in English, but she’d be in the year below me when we went back to college in September, so I’d never see her in class anyway.

  “Thank you for being so sweet to my mum,” Daisy said, sitting on the bed and kicking off her shoes.

  “No problem. Your folks seem lovely.”

  I sat down next to her and took my shoes off as well. Daisy removed her socks, releasing the pink nails, and I brushed my foot along hers.

  “Jack, that tickles,” she giggled, and I placed a hand over my mouth in shock.

  “Does it really, Miss Mulligan?” and then we were kissing.

  Every time I tasted her lips, I always wanted more. This was only our fourth kiss, not that I was counting or anything, but it was so perfect. There was a spark between us and, as she slipped her tongue in my mouth, I pushed her backwards, so we were lying down.

  “Excuse me, sir, but where do you think you’re taking this?” Daisy teased, flicking the tip of my nose.

  “Nowhere,” I grinned, but she looked disappointed.

  Sliding a hand under my top, she traced my skin. It tickled a little, but I let her do it anyway. Then she kissed my neck, and moved back to my lips.

  “I hate to break this up, but I need a pee,” I grimaced, pushing her lightly off me and standing to my feet.

  “Hurry back, mister,” Daisy flirted.

  I jogged along the landing to the end, and pushed open the door. The only problem was, I couldn’t remember which she’d said the toilet was. I’d been too busy staring at her legs poking out of the blue skirt she was wearing. The first room I’d opened wasn’t right. It was her mum and dad’s room and I closed it immediately, not wanting to intrude.

  Looking left and right, deciding which to go for, I pushed open the door on the left and entered.

  This definitely wasn’t the bathroom either. I was about to head into the room opposite, but something stopped me. It was the feeling in the room. It was the only part of the house that didn’t feel warm and cosy. It was cold, like no one had been in here for some time, and there w
as dust everywhere.

  “Maybe the maid forgot to clean this room,” I muttered, then chuckled to myself. As far as I’m aware, they did all the cleaning themselves. But why leave this room out?

  There was a cot in the far corner and I moved over to it, torn between intrigue and a guilty conscience for snooping. I rested a hand on the mobile and spun it manually, watching it twirl. Why was this even in here? Daisy had never mentioned any siblings.

  The room belonged to a girl, as far as I could tell. The pink wallpaper, fairy books, and cuddly ponies made this a worthy assessment. I was so confused.

  I walked over to the little desk in the corner and brushed dust off the picture book. This was no ordinary picture book though. It was a family photo album. Turning the page, I saw a much younger Daisy. She was probably twelve or thirteen in the photo, and she was holding a baby. Not her own, I hoped, so it must have been a family member. Not a sibling though, so who?

  Her mum and dad were standing next to them looking happy, so much happier than they’d been today. Her dad had one arm around his wife, the other resting on Daisy’s shoulder. As I turned the pages, this same sort of picture kept reappearing; her dad holding onto her mum, one hand on Daisy’s shoulder.

  The key differences were the backgrounds and the child. The child kept getting older and, by the time I’d got to the last photo, she must have been four or five. The locations were always changing, too. Some were outside a restaurant, some outside shops, and the last one was even taken at the top of a ski slope, with them dressed in winter clothes and woolly hats.

  I slammed the album closed. I was completely confused, but I didn’t think I should be. Daisy must have had a relative they spent time with. So what? But it wasn’t that. There was more to it.

  I looked back at the cot, the mobile, the wallpaper, the books, the ponies, and then at the cover of the album. I’d told myself that it didn’t make sense, but then I was sure that it did. This was Daisy’s secret, the one she’d kept from me.

  “You shouldn’t be in here, Jack,” her soft voice whispered from behind.

  “You had a sister?” I asked, refusing to turn around.

  I could feel the anger bristling off of her. She had let me into her house, and I’d betrayed her trust by snooping. It wasn’t intentional, though. I was only looking for the bathroom.

  I was half-expecting a slap across the back of my head but, as she came up to me, she kissed me and buried her face in my top.

  “Yes, Jack. I had a sister,” she revealed at last, confirming my suspicions.

  But then, what she said next, shook me right down to the core, right down to the bone, and I couldn’t believe it. I wouldn’t believe it, but I had to.

  “I had a sister, Jack. But she died two years ago. And the whole thing, all of it, was entirely my fault.”

  And then she began to cry.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  “Did you murder her?”

  The question was sharp and to the point, direct, but harsh.

  “No. For fuck’s sake, Jack, who do you take me for?”

  Daisy had tears streaming down her face and she slammed the door behind her as she stormed out. I was surprised her parents didn’t come to investigate, but maybe they knew the situation. Perhaps they knew I’d find out the truth that today.

  “Daisy, hey, come here,” I said, opening her bedroom door to find her bundled in a pile on the bed.

  “Fuck off, Jack,” her voice was harsh, and I didn’t blame her at all.

  “Daisy, listen,” I sat on the bed next to her and wrapped my arms around her. “Whatever happened, you can talk to me. I’m here for you, you know that, right?”

  “You thought I’d killed my own sister. How could you even think that?”

  She looked up at me a second, yesterday’s make up completely smeared down her cheeks. Surprisingly, it kind of suited her. I flicked the end of the nose, just as she’d done to me, but she didn’t take it in a playful manner.

  “Leave me alone,” and she rested her head on the bed.

  “You want me to go?” I asked, praying she’d say no. I wasn’t ready to leave. Not yet.

  “No,” she said quickly, and my breath steadied. “Don’t go. Stay with me.”

  “Always.”

  She sat up on the bed, wiped her nose on her arm, and sniffed. I passed the box of tissues from the floor to her, she nodded appreciatively, took one, and dabbed at her eyes.

  “Alright, Jack. I’ll tell you what happened. I just hope you don’t think any less of me.”

  “I will never think less of you, baby,” I said, and she smiled at the pet name.

  I guess I’d got back in her good books again, despite my horrible accusation. I still couldn’t believe I’d even suggested it.

  “I had a baby sister. She was five when she died, and it was completely my fault. Well, I blame myself but everyone says I shouldn’t. They say there was nothing I could have done to save her.”

  “Just tell me, Daisy,” I encouraged, a hand on her arm.

  “It was June 2015. I had just finished year ten and we went on holiday. Ibiza. It was hot, way too hot. My mum and dad went out for the day and they left us in the apartment.”

  “They left you alone?” I asked.

  “Yes, me and Ruby. That was my sister, obviously.”

  “OK,” I nodded, waiting for the rest.

  “We decided to go to the beach,” and the words had only just flushed from her mouth when a new wave of tears came on. This time, she was sobbing even harder. “I told her she could go swimming, Jack. I fucking told her it was OK. Why the fuck would I do that?” she screamed, picking up the box of tissues and throwing them at the door.

  I knew where this story was going. “Did she drown?” I questioned, knowing the answer.

  “Yes, Jack, she drowned. I was eating a sandwich on the beach, keeping an eye on her. I wanted to make sure she was safe, so I wasn’t even reading my book for once. The next thing I knew, she was gone. Dragged underneath. She must have been quite far out. I mean, I could see her, of course and she looked fine, but there’s no other explanation. She looked quite close to shore, but there was a strong current and she was gone.”

  “So, it wasn’t your fault,” I comforted. “Not at all.”

  “Yes, it was, Jack.”

  “How was it?”

  “I was supposed to be keeping an eye on her, and I let her drown. I was so stupid. I should have gone in with her. She was a child, for God’s sake.”

  “You did everything you could, OK. You kept an eye on her, it wasn’t your fault.”

  “I know,” Daisy sniffed, and I was glad. “But I swam out there as soon as I knew she’d gone under. Ruby never was a strong swimmer, but I thought she’d be alright. I thought she’d be fine. There were other people in the sea but none near where she was, and no one would notice a little girl anyway. I screamed and ran and jumped in and swam after her, but she was further away than I’d thought. It took a few minutes to get to her. I was a few minutes too late.”

  “Oh, God,” I cried, holding my hands to my mouth. I couldn’t ever imagine what Daisy had been though. It must have been awful.

  “She had drowned before I got there. I pulled her up, but it was tough. She was weak and the current was strong. She’d gone, and do you know what the worst part was?”

  I shook my head, tears in my eyes.

  “The worst part were my parents. I dragged Ruby back to shore and someone called my parents. It was so hard, seeing their heartbroken faces. I’ve never been able to get it off my mind. Even now, I hear them crying sometimes at night. She was their little girl, and she died because of me.”

  Both of us had tears streaming down our faces, but I was there for her. I held her in my arms, kissed her forehead, felt her heavy breathing against my chest.

  I never imagined Daisy had been through something like that. I knew she had secrets, but that was something else. It was heart-breaking, and I didn’t blame her
for not telling me until now.

  In fact, I was feeling so guilty for having found the room on my own. I hadn’t intended to snoop, but she’d been forced to tell me in the end and I didn’t know if I could forgive myself for that. Still, I thought it was better to have the truth out in the open. Daisy needed me, and I was there for her.

  “I’ll get you a cuppa,” I said to her. She smiled. It was a sad smile, but she didn’t say anything.

  “Is Daisy alright?” her mum called to me from the living room, as I plodded down the stairs.

  I really didn’t want to discuss it with her, but I had to. I had to let her know how sorry I was, that I would always be there for them, that I couldn’t imagine what they’d been through. I expressed all of this, and then I regretted it. I could see that I’d brought back old memories, ones she didn’t want to revisit.

  “We’ve had time to move on,” Mrs Mulligan told me with a sigh. “It’s hard and it still hurts. It will do for a long time, but Daisy’s suffered the most. She still feels guilty for what happened. It wasn’t her fault.”

  I nodded, patted her on the arm, and then made that tea. While I was brewing the cuppa, my mind was racing and my head was spinning. It was so much that I had to take in. So much that I never expected. What else was Daisy hiding? I couldn’t think about that now.

  Losing a child and a sister was awful, especially in such circumstances. I could imagine her underwater, thrashing about, helpless, weak, tiny, fighting for breath. In the final moments before she died, I wondered what she thought about. Her family, probably. Her mum and dad, and her sister, who was sitting just a short distance away. Her sister who had failed her, who hadn’t come to the rescue.

  “Knock, knock. The tea fairy’s here,” I chuckled, trying to lighten the mood as I entered Daisy’s room.

  She looked slightly better, at least. She still had watery eyes, but she was in the process of wiping the makeup off her cheeks, and that was a big improvement.

  “Thank you, Jack,” she smiled, and gave me a hug.

  We looked at each other for a second, an uncomfortable silence hanging in the air, and then we were kissing. It took me completely by surprise because I knew she was still upset, but I guess she was glad for the support. She bit my lip gently, and gave me a look. A look that told me everything I needed to know, without her having to say it.