Tear Down These Walls

by Carter, Sarah

“Oh no,” Teagan says. “That’s not it at all. This side of you is great!”

  “How great?” Trent inquires, grabbing at her.

  She crosses her arms and retorts, “What would you do if I said fine and came onto you?”

  “You won’t, so I’m not worried,” Trent sighs happily, grinning.

  Teagan starts to slowly back up, “See, that’s the thing. I’m calling your bluff.”

  “Where are you going?” Trent asks, looking confused.

  “To the locker room,” Teagan murmurs. She stares at him as she continues to back up.

  “Bullshit,” Trent laughs.

  Turning Teagan casually walks away from him. When she gets to the door, she turns around. “Are you coming?”

  “You are so full of shit!” Trent laughs. With a smirk, Teagan walks through the doorway and turns to the right. Giggling to herself, she takes off her hoodie and holds it into the doorway. She throws it to the ground. “Oh my gosh, you took of your sweatshirt. How daring!”

  Teagan scowls. She takes in a deep breath and takes off her shirt. Nervously, Teagan holds it in the doorway, waves it and throws it on the ground. There is nothing but silence. Now she knows she has him. Teagan takes off each shoe and throws them on the pile of clothes. Then her socks come off and take their place on the pile. Still, Trent doesn’t say anything. “What in the hell?” She whispers ever so quietly. Leaning forward, Teagan listens and can’t hear anything. “What is he doing?” Suddenly, a pair of pants comes flying into the room and lands on her pile of clothes. “Holy shit,” Teagan squeals. “Trent!” There is still no sound. “Trent! What are you doing!?”

  “The question is….what are you doing?” She hears from right outside the door.

  “I didn’t take my pants off!” Teagan shouts in shock.

  “Yeah, I know,” Trent replies. “But I did. Now what are you going to do?”

  She stomps her foot and giggles, “Put your pants back on!”

  “I will have to come and get them,” Trent chuckles.

  Turning around Teagan says, “Fine, I’m not looking.” She covers her eyes with her hand. After a few seconds, Teagan senses Trent behind her. “Are you putting your pants on?” Teagan asks hotly.

  “No,” Trent whispers from behind her. He brushes her hair away from her neck and kisses her shoulder. “You said you were calling my bluff,” he breathes out against her skin.

  Everything in Teagan tightens, and desire starts to grow. She can’t even talk. Trent slides his hand around and places it on her stomach with his fingertips tracing along the top of her jeans. Teagan gulps and backs up into him. Trent starts to kiss up her neck. “Trent,” she exhales.

  “Mmmmmm,” he hums in reply, as he traces his other fingers down her arm.

  “What are you doing?” She asks quietly.

  “Calling your bluff,” he murmurs against her skin.

  There is a moment of hesitation, and then Teagan whispers, “And if I don’t want you to stop?”

  Trent pauses and then says, “Then I don’t stop.”

  Teagan’s head starts to spin. There is a deep ache in her, and she just wants to let go. “Trent,” she exhales.

  “Yes.”

  “What are we doing?”

  “Getting in the shower,” Trent exhales as he unbuttons her jeans. Teagan’s breath hitches in her throat. “Do you have a problem with that?”

  She waits a few seconds and then whispers, “No.”

  “Good.” He sweeps her up in his arms. Trent carries Teagan into one of the shower stalls. He pulls the curtain shut and then sets her down.

  “Are we really doing this?” Teagan squeaks.

  A wicked smile passes over Trent’s face. “I’m still waiting for you to chicken out.”

  Teagan’s jaw drops, “Whatever!”

  “Oh come on,” Trent whispers, as he slowly pulls down her zipper. “When are you going to make me stop?” Her breath quickens from anticipation, and she stares at him. Trent only smiles back, as he starts to push her jeans down. He gets them past her butt and raises an eyebrow. “Should I stop?” Teagan barely shrugs her shoulders. Trent’s eyes light up, and he completely pulls her pants off. Teagan steps out of them. “Wow babe, you really are calling my bluff, huh?” Trent laughs, as he stands back up. “How far are we taking this?”

  “I don’t know,” Teagan barely breathes out.

  Trent looks at her mischievously. “All right.” He turns on the shower, and it hits them both. Teagan gasps. “Holy crap that’s cold!” Trent laughs.

  “Turn it off!” Teagan yells, as she backs away from the water.

  “Nope,” Trent chirps, grabbing her. “It will get hot in a second.”

  “Trent!”

  He only laughs and holds her against him. Finally, the water does get hot. “See….not so bad,” he murmurs.

  Looking up at him, Teagan declares softly, “I have never been in a shower with a guy before.”

  “Hmmmm,” Trent hums. “There is a lot you haven’t done.” He bends down and brushes his lips against hers. “Are you ready to give in yet because I am going to kiss you in about a second.” Teagan stares at him. He studies her for a moment and then bends down, placing his lips on hers. Something inside of Teagan unfurls. She wraps her arms around his neck and pulls him tight against her. For the first time, Trent parts her lips with his and gently grazes his tongue against hers. Teagan moans into his mouth. He lifts her up and puts her against the wall. Teagan wraps her legs around him tightly. They kiss each other madly, passionately. Every wall she has built up comes crashing down. She feels like she could get lost him in forever.

  Suddenly they hear, “Trent! Are you in the shower!?”

  They quickly pull away from each other, and Teagan looks at Trent in horror. He puts his finger up to his lips. Teagan freezes, and Trent yells, “Yeah! Meet you out front in a second!”

  “All right man!” The voice responds.

  “Trent,” Teagan whimpers. “My clothes are out there! Whoever that is will know!”

  “Shhhhh baby,” he murmurs. “It’s fine.” He turns off the shower and says, “Stay here.” With that, Trent disappears around the corner. He comes back with Teagan’s clothes and a towel. “Get dried off and dressed. I will distract Kirk.”

  “Who is that!?” Teagan hisses.

  “One of my sparring partners,” Trent replies. “He must have seen my truck. I will try to get him to leave. Don’t worry.”

  Teagan jerkily nods. Trent bends over and kisses her forehead. Then he walks out of the shower and disappears around the corner. Teagan listens for a second and then hears Trent talking to someone outside the locker room. Their voices grow fainter. She quickly dries herself off in record time. Not so gracefully, Teagan pulls her clothes on. It’s hard with a wet bra and underwear. When she is finally dressed, she sits down on one of the benches.

  A single tear falls down her cheek. Teagan wipes it away and realizes someone almost walked in on her. Someone almost saw. There is an instant burning and pain in her chest. More tears start to fall. She scrambles and feels the pockets of her hoodie. Her keys and cell phone are in them. Teagan quickly stands up. “There has to be a back door,” she gasps in between sharp breathes.

  She heads to the farthest corner of the building and finds a metal door. Looking around, there doesn’t seem to be an alarm on it. Teagan pushes the bar, and the door opens to the alley in back. She steps out into the brisk air and lets the door close behind her.

  Her car is parked on the side of the building. She quickly gets into it and pulls out of the dojo parking lot. She turns down the opposite way on the street from the front of the building. With painful gasps, Teagan cries all the way back to her apartment. When she is only a few blocks away her cell phone rings. Teagan looks at it and sees that it’s Trent. She presses end, ignoring the call.

  When Teagan parks her car, she puts her face in her hands and cries, “Why did I do that? We aren’t even together! What is he going
to think of me now!?”

  Again, her cell phone starts ringing. It’s Trent. She shakes her head and presses ignore. Quickly, she gets out of the car and runs to her building. When she gets into her apartment, she slams the door and locks it.

  The alarm starts beeping and she yells, “Crap!” She starts to push the buttons on the pad. The code doesn’t work and it continues to beep. “Crap! Work, damn it!”

  There is a ping on her phone saying there is a voicemail. As soon as it’s quiet, it’s starts ringing again. Teagan smacks the control box and swears to herself. “Pound 6-9-4-3-2-7 Pound.” It still beeps. “DAMN IT, WORK!” She presses it again, and it finally works and stops. “Stupid alarm!” She cries, smacking it.

  Again her cell phone starts ringing. She answers and yells, “What!?”

  “What do you mean what!?” Trent shouts back. “Where in the hell are you!?”

  “I’m at home,” Teagan sniffles. “I couldn’t get my alarm to turn off!”

  “I know,” Trent replies. “It was sent to my phone. I was ready to call the stupid police! Damn it, Teagan!”

  She scowls, “I was doing it right. Pound, the number and then pound.”

  Trent groans. “No baby, it’s pound and then the number, no second pound.”

  “Well, I didn’t know that!” Teagan snaps. “God!”

  “Whatever, that’s not important. Why in the hell did you leave?” Instantly, Teagan starts crying again. “Oh god Teagan, what did I do? Did I go too far? I’m so, so sorry. I got lost in it. I should have known better. You aren’t ready for any of that. I am sorry I pushed it.” Teagan falls to her knees and cries. “Damn it, what did I do?” Trent groans. “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah,” Teagan gasps. “It’s just……”

  “You didn’t want to do that, and I pushed you. I’m sorry,” Trent states, “So sorry.”

  Teagan shakes her head, taking a seat on her couch. “It’s not that I didn’t want it, but……it’s not like that with us. You said you didn’t want us to be together like that.”

  “Because you don’t want anything,” Trent sighs. “I get that, I’m sorry.”

  “I don’t want anything?” Teagan whispers.

  “Yeah,” Trent replies. “I promise. I will never try anything like that again. Never. Do you forgive me?”

  She starts to fiddle with the bottom of her hoodie. “It’s not something to forgive you for. I wanted it.”

  “You did?”

  “Of course, I was kissing you back. I would probably have gone all the way. I was ready to.”

  “Okay….” Trent draws out cautiously.

  “But, it’s not like that with us,” Teagan moans. “It would just complicate things.”

  Trent pauses and then says, “I won’t try anything again. No kissing, I promise. What about touching you?”

  “Trent,” Teagan sighs. “You can touch me anytime you want, and you can kiss me, just no tongue.”

  He laughs, “All right, deal. Are you okay?”

  “Yeah,” Teagan sniffles. “I’m sorry I freaked. It’s just….someone almost walked in on us.”

  “Sorry,” Trent mumbles. “Sort of has been a fantasy of mine.”

  “Doing it in the shower?” Teagan giggles. “You have never done that before, really?”

  “No…” Trent starts. “More like public places.”

  “Really?” Teagan giggles even more.

  Trent laughs softly, “Yes, most pointedly my office.”

  “Interesting. The naughty secretary thing?”

  “Sure, why not,” Trent laughs. “I just need to find a girl that will go for it.”

  “After hours I take it?”

  “Hell no, during the day,” Trent declares.

  “What if someone walks in!?” Teagan exclaims.

  Trent sighs, “I have a lock on the door.”

  “Well then, make sure you tell your future girlfriend about that,” Teagan snorts.

  “I don’t know if I would share that right away,” Trent chuckles. “I need to make sure she is pretty damn special before I risk my reputation.”

  Teagan gets quiet. “Well, you let me know when a girl like that comes around.”

  He quietly whispers, “Okay.”

  She frowns, “You know, we aren’t going to be able to be like this forever.”

  “Why not?” Trent asks.

  “Because, you will meet someone, and…..well……we won’t be this close anymore.”

  With a heavy sigh, Trent says, “You will find someone too, but that won’t change how I feel about you. You are the closest thing I have to a best friend right now. I don’t think you quite understand that I don’t let people into my life, especially girls.”

  “Why not?” Teagan inquires quietly.

  “Give me……a little more time. I promise I will tell you why. I’m just not ready yet.”

  “You know my darkest secret,” Teagan whispers.

  “My not telling you is protecting someone else, Teagan. Someone that I hold very dear,” Trent assures her calmly. “One day, I will tell you my secret, but….just….not yet.”

  Cautiously, Teagan says, “You are in love with someone.”

  He bursts out laughing. “Ummmm, no, I’m not in love with someone, not in the way that you are thinking.”

  “Oh. So, there isn’t another woman?”

  “No, there isn’t another woman,” Trent chuckles. “Can we please get off the subject? I will tell you someday when I am ready.”

  “Sure,” Teagan exhales.

  In a soft voice Trent says, “Teagan, I will tell you. I promise.”

  “I know.”

  “So, are you coming back for class?”

  She frowns again, “No.”

  “Teagan!” Trent retorts sharply.

  “I’m not in the mood,” Teagan whispers. “I’m embarrassed as hell.”

  “You need to know this stuff! And nobody saw us, I promise.” He exclaims.

  Teagan cops a bit of an attitude. “You know, since I am so close to the instructor that I nearly had sex with him in the shower, you would think that he would give me private lessons.”

  Trent pauses a moment before replying, “You know….that’s a really good point.”

  “Yeah,” Teagan snips. “You should be giving me private tutoring, so to speak.”

  “And I will,” Trent replies. “When?”

  “This week isn’t good,” Teagan sighs. “I have to cram so much together before Thursday. Plus, I work Tuesday and Wednesday evening.”

  “Are you staying at my house on Wednesday night, after you get off of work? Our plane leaves at 9 am. That means we have to be at the airport at 7, which means we have to leave early.”

  Rolling her eyes, Teagan groans, “Only you would book a flight in the morning.”

  “I figured you would want to spend as much time with your family and friends as possible.”.

  “That’s true,” Teagan says. “I don’t know if I am going to be able to afford to go home for Christmas.”

  “Well, see, then it’s a good thing we will be there early. We are also coming back Sunday night, on a late flight,” Trent states. “So, you can do the gift opening and everything.”

  “Have this all set up do you?” Teagan laughs. She heads into her bedroom to straighten up while they talk on the phone.

  With a snort, Trent says, “I’m always prepared.”

  “Are you one of those guys that always carries a condom in his pocket?” Teagan inquires slyly. “Always hoping for the unexpected tryst?” Trent doesn’t say anything. “Oh my god!” Teagan exclaims. “You do!”

  “Can we please not talk about this?” Trent moans.

  “Is it in your wallet?” Teagan giggles laying back on her bed. More silence. Teagan laughs harder. “If you haven’t had sex in two years, why do you carry around a condom, especially if you don’t get drunk at the bars and bring home random women!?”

  “Teagan, I’m not talking abo
ut this,” Trent warns.

  Now, she can’t help it. “What are you expecting to happen? Have you had the same condom in there for two years?”

  “Listen,” Trent starts. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Tell me,” Teagan pleads as she props herself up on her elbows. “Come on, you know so much crap about me. Open up Trent.”

  He whispers, “Call me by my name.”

  “Trent? I just did,” Teagan retorts, totally confused.

  “No, Kellen, call me Kellen. It feels weird when you call me Trent. That really isn’t my name.”

  “But isn’t that what you go by?” Teagan asks.

  He sighs. “To everyone else, but not to the people that are close to me.”

  “Okay…..Kellen,” Teagan murmurs. “That feels weird. You are Trent!”

  “No, I’m Kellen. I am Kellen Grayson. The people that matter don’t call me Trent.”

  “Okay….Kellen,” Teagan replies. “Am I supposed to introduce you to people with that name?”

  After a second, he says, “Yes.”

  “So, Kellen….”

  “Yes, Kellen….does that bother you?”

  “No,” Teagan replies, though she thinks it is a little weird.

  He laughs, “It’s weird for you.”

  “No, Kellen, I get it,” Teagan replies. “Kellen Grayson. I can do that.” She starts to twirl a piece of her hair between her fingers.

  “Good, it sounds good coming from you.”

  “So, Kellen…..”

  “Yes Teagan?” He laughs.

  “Why do you have a condom in your wallet?” She inquires.

  Groaning, he exclaims, “Will you get off of it!?”

  “NO!” Teagan says. “TELL ME! Just why, come on. Has it been the same condom for the last two years?”

  In a rather irritated tone, Kellen says, “Just drop it.”

  “What are you hiding?” Teagan teases. “Are you really having sex on the side? Come on, you can tell me!” She heads into the kitchen, propping the phone against her ear with her shoulder.

  “No, this I can’t tell you,” he barely mumbles.

  “Why?” Teagan quips, taking a can of soda out of the fridge. “It’s me!”

  “EXACTLY,” Kellen exclaims.

  “Huh?” Teagan retorts, taking a sip.