Living With Him

by J. L. Ostle

  “Welcome to Alpha Tote,” a voice booms out when the song ends, making me jump. I look at the stage and the band pauses. “Thank you all for coming. Remember the only rule we follow at this house.” People whisper and giggle. “The rule is to have fun,” the voice shouts over the microphone that must be attached to the sound system as I can’t tell who the voice is from.

  The band starts up their next song and Kendra and I continue dancing. Every now and then, Jayce will leave to come back with more drinks. My body feels looser and relaxed and I laugh and joke with Kendra.

  “I am having such a good time.” I hug her.

  “I knew you would. You seem to be liking your cocktails too.” She smiles at me.

  Wait, I’m drinking alcohol? I thought it was juice. “You gave me alcohol?” My happy mood is evaporating.

  “I thought you knew. You were there when I first poured the drinks.” Kendra stops dancing.

  “I wasn’t watching you. I can’t believe you gave me alcohol, especially after everything I went through.” I feel tears brim my eyes.

  “You are allowed to drink. You aren’t going to turn into him by enjoying yourself. I saw no harm, and plus, Jayce isn’t drinking, remember? He is driving us home and he is here to look after us.” She holds my hand. “You know I would never bring harm to you.”

  I nod, looking at the floor. “I just don’t like the thought of what alcohol can do to some people.”

  She nods in understanding. She witnessed what that asshole was like when he had alcohol in him. He was mean and harsh. “I know, but people drink to socialize and have fun too. You aren’t going to drink every day, now are you?”

  I shake my head.

  “So just have fun, and if you don’t want to drink anymore, that’s fine.”

  I know I went over the top but alcohol is a sore subject for me. “Okay, but I think I’ve had enough for tonight.”

  She nods. “That’s fine. So let’s just dance and we will go home soon.” We dance again but her hands stay in mine.

  “Everyone, we are taking a little break,” Devon says into the mic, and Jackson jumps down and heads towards us.

  “What did you guys think?” He puts his arm around my shoulders.

  “You were okay,” Kendra teases.

  “Ha ha, very funny. What about you, kitten? You enjoy it?”

  I nod enthusiastically. “I thought you guys were brilliant.”

  He beams at me. “Glad you liked it.” He kisses the top of my head and he starts talking to Jayce when some blonde saunters over and presses her body against his chest.

  “Hey, Jackson, I need a hand with something. You got a minute or two?” She bats her eyelashes at him.

  “Sure, see you guys in a moment.” The girl links her arm in his as they walk away and Jayce whispers something in Kendra’s ear, smiling.

  “You are gross.” Kendra hits him but Jayce laughs.

  “Hey, Riley.” I turn to see Devon walking towards us. “I saw you dancing away. You enjoying our music?”

  “Yeah, I loved it. You really have a great voice. No wonder you are so popular.”

  He smiles at me. “What made you think we are popular?”

  “Apart from the screaming girls and a few of them throwing their underwear on the stage? Just a guess.”

  He throws his head back and laughs. “I like you.” He points at me.

  “Glad you do.” It was meant to sound friendly, but hearing it out loud, it sounded flirtatious and I didn’t mean it to. Devon is very attractive but he is just a goofball, and I wouldn’t be able to take him seriously. But from the look he is giving me, I know he caught the flirtatious tone.

  “Sorry to break up this love connection but I really need the bathroom. Come with me.” Kendra guides us both upstairs. “Do you want to come in with me?”

  “I love you but I don’t want to watch you pee,” I laugh.

  “Okay, but stay right here and don’t move.”

  I nod. I lean against the wall as I wait for her when I hear a bang down the corridor, and see a very drunk guy swaying and banging into the wall and doors. I wish I’d never looked as his eyes connect with mine and he gives me a smile, but I look away.

  “Hey, beautiful,” he slurs. “Want to dance?” He walks closer to me.

  “No, thank you, I’m waiting for my friend.” I feel his hand glide up my arm and my whole body tenses up, red alert screaming in my head. I try to knock on the door to tell Kendra to hurry, but the guy grabs me, pulling me into him, smelling my neck.

  “You smell so good.”

  I try to release myself but he’s too strong.

  “Want to make out?”

  I shake my head.

  “Yo, Danny, Trixie is asking for you,” a guy calls and Danny lets go.

  “Your loss.” He sways towards the guy, heading down the stairs.

  I put my hand on my chest, feeling relieved. God, I hate men who are drunk.

  I am looking at my nails so I look busy, when I hear groaning down the hall. I ignore it as I don’t want to hear people going at it, but then I hear a crash. What if there’s a guy who isn’t taking no for an answer? Against better judgment, I walk slowly towards the noise and then I hear another crash and I jump. I get to the door and it’s ajar so I look in, and I wish I hadn’t as I see Jackson with the blonde.

  The blonde is bent over the bed, leaning on her arms as Jackson is thrusting inside her. I see a lamp and books on the floor, so I guess those were the noises I heard. I need to look away. Jackson has his jeans around his ankles and I hate that his legs look all muscular as well.

  He really is all man.

  “Please, harder,” she begs. “Please, Jackson.” And his thrusts change rhythm.

  “I like girls that beg,” he says in her ear.

  I am still watching, when Kendra grabs my arm and pulls me away. “What are you doing?” she says once we are away from the room.

  I have never felt more embarrassed than now. “I didn’t mean … I just heard …” I stutter over my words.

  “Take a deep breath.” She holds onto my shoulder and I do. “You were curious?”

  It’s not really a question, but I nod. “I am such a perv. I didn’t mean to, honestly. I heard a crash and thought maybe a guy was taking it too far.”

  She nods in understanding. “I get it, I do. Let’s just take you away before they realize you were catching their show,” she chuckles.

  “Can we please forget this happened?”

  “We can, after tonight.” She winks at me and I push her.

  “You are mean.”

  “I know.”

  We go outside for some fresh air, when a drunk guy walks towards me and pulls my arm. “Come on, sexy, dance with me.”

  My body tenses and I can smell the alcohol all over him and there’s no music being played.

  “Let go of her, asshole.” Kendra tries to pull me away, but the guy holds on tighter and pulls me away to his side.

  “She’s with me, bitch,” he hiccups.

  I try to release his hold on me but his fingers grip onto my arm. Kendra stomps over to him and grabs my arm, the guy pushes her so hard that she falls to the ground.

  “Kendra,” I shout and the guy laughs. No one is helping. “Jackson,” I scream. I know he’s upstairs but it’s the first name that popped out of my mouth but it is like my wish comes true. He appears and looks at the guy holding me and at Kendra on the floor, glaring at the drunk guy.

  “You motherfucker,” Jackson growls and heads towards us, grabbing the guy and punching him in the stomach and then across the face as the guy falls to the ground.

  Kendra runs to my side and holds me. “I am so sorry. Are you okay?”

  I nod. “This is why I hate alcohol.” I shake my head.

  “What a dickhead.”

  “What the fuck, man?” the guy groans standing back up.

  “You are going to pay for what you were about to do.” Jackson punches him again.

/>   “She wanted it.” Is this guy delusional? He is trying to defend his actions.

  “Yeah, it looks like it. Didn’t your mother ever teach you to never hurt a woman?” Jackson knees him hard in the chest causing the guy to fall to the ground again.

  “Are you okay?” Jayce asks, looking at us both.

  “This asshole grabbed our girl here. I think Jackson, though, is taking it a little too far.” Kendra nods towards Jackson, and Jayce walks up to him, pulling him away.

  “I just want to go home now.”

  Kendra nods. “Let’s go. This guy ruined the party for us.”

  “Jackson, leave it, man.”

  Jackson takes a few steps back. “Get this fucker out of here.”

  On cue, a few guys come over and pick up the guy and I see the blood dripping from his lip and nose, the guy staggers away. What he did was wrong, but I feel Jackson was hurting him more than he needed to, just because of me.

  People watch the scene in front of them. Well, if they didn’t know who I was before, they do now.

  “Asshole,” Jackson grits out and heads over to me. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” He inspects my body and then his eyes go dark when he sees a bruise forming on my arm. I hate that I bruise easily. “That motherfucker,” he growls.

  “Jackson, calm down, we don’t want the police on their way.”

  Jackson pulls at his hair and comes back to me and holds my face. “I promised you would be safe. From now on, I swear I will protect you.” He holds me, stroking my hair. “I got you. I will always have you.” He grabs my face again, looking into my eyes.

  “Hey, man, we have to finish our set if we want to get paid,” Devon says.

  “I am taking her home.” Kendra links her arm with mine. “Go finish, she will be fine.”

  He looks like he wants to argue but he nods. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “I’m fine, really.”

  “Okay, I will be home right after this.” He kisses my forehead.

  I watch him head back inside and I see the girl he just had sex with leaning against the door, watching and when he walks past her, she grabs his arm but he looks at her with disgust and says something and walks off. The girl looks at me and glares.

  “I don’t think she is happy.” Kendra shakes her head and she and Jayce take me home.

  Chapter Eight

  Two weeks have gone by and rumors have spread like the plague. I was once invisible but now people stare and whisper when they see me walk by.

  The main rumors, though, aren’t about what happened, they are about me and Jackson. Everyone saw him comfort me, how he fought that guy for me. We have been inseparable ever since, though. He walks with me to most of my classes, we study together, and he brings me to his band rehearsals, which Devon doesn’t mind at all, as he has chatted me up every chance he gets.

  I know he is only messing around. I have gotten to know each of them a little better and they really are good guys. I sometimes feel like a queen when I’m around them all as they get me drinks and snacks, and they even order me food. I am happy I have men in my life who are happy to look after me.

  Jackson keeps most of the gossip at bay by continuing to hook up with girls, but he does follow my advice and he tells them it’s only a one-night thing. He is even nicer when he boots them out of the house the next day, but the women still act shocked when he doesn’t show them any more interest. I guess being nice is no different than when he acts like an ass and ignores them, until they take the hint.

  Girls who now speak to me, ask what my secret is for him being around me as much as he is, as they are happy enough to tell me that he doesn’t stick with one girl. Since he continues to sit with me at lunch and takes me out to movies and dinner, rumors are that I am his “fuck buddy,” their words, not mine. They are still happy enough to try to get into his bed, even though they think he is sleeping with me also.

  Do I look like the type of girl who lives with a guy and sleeps with him and would still be okay with him sleeping with other women? People just love drama and want to butt their noses in mine and Jackson’s business.

  Kendra and I are in the cafeteria, talking about a movie night when Jackson places a can of Coke and a strawberry muffin in front of me. Kendra has stopped getting me my drinks as Jackson normally beats her to it.

  I have told him he needs to stop buying me food but he says he enjoys watching me eat; he likes the satisfactory look on my face when I enjoy something. I found it weird but he doesn’t take no for an answer.

  “You didn’t need to get me a muffin,” I say lifting it and feel that it’s still warm.

  “But you are my muffin so I had to get a muffin for my muffin.” He smiles at me and I can’t help but giggle.

  “Well, how can I argue with that?”

  “You can’t, so eat up.”

  I take off the wrapper and take a bite and it’s so soft and moist, but I have learned to not make noises as the guys do look at me weirdly.

  “How come I don’t get muffins and treats?” Kendra pouts at him.

  “Because you have a boyfriend, who should be doing that.” He points at Jayce, who is throwing him daggers.

  “Yeah, boyfriend, where is my free cakes? Jackson and Riley aren’t even seeing each other and he is nicer to her than you are to me,” she pouts.

  “Baby, you are a very independent woman. I didn’t think you would want me to. Besides, the joys of us being a couple is the making out and the hot, hot sex.” He winks at her and then his mouth is on hers.

  “I feel sick now,” I joke and look away.

  “So, Jackson, I heard that Candice girl has been stalking you. Didn’t your niceness the morning after work? I heard rumors that he makes some of them breakfast before they get shown the door. A fuck and then food. I wouldn’t even bother. My motto is bone them and leave them,” Darren jokes.

  “That’s why no woman wants seconds, I heard rumors that you are packing an itsy bitsy. So, they probably can’t wait to walk out the door.” I frown at him. He, Jackson, and Kendra look at me in shock. I would never talk like that but he has been bugging me for weeks and the things that come out of his mouth are just disgusting.

  “Whoa, little Miss Goody-goody is defending the campus player. Don’t you hate that he will sleep with anyone but you?” He winks at me and I stand up.

  “He is my friend and you are just messed up in the head. You need to get a life.” I feel my blood boiling. Jackson stands up and holds my hand.

  “Aww, don’t they look cute holding hands.”

  Jackson leans over and punches him in the face so hard that he falls back onto the floor. “I don’t think you should join us for lunch anymore. We are tired of your shit.”

  Darren stands and straightens up. “You can’t tell me where to sit.”

  “Try me. Does anyone at this table want him to continue eating here?” Jackson looks at each person and no one says anything. “There, see? They are tired of your shit too, so take a hike.”

  “Guys, come on. It was a joke,” he chuckles.

  “Well, I don’t think it was funny and yeah, we get with women but even we show them more respect than what you do,” a guy called Kent says.

  “This table is a joke anyway. We are the star athletes of this school and you want to side with this rocker rather than your fellow teammate?” Everyone stays quiet. “Fine, fuck you.” He grabs his stuff and leaves.

  “Thank you for sticking up for me,” I say as Jackson pulls me into his side. “I couldn’t stand listening to him any longer. He is so crude.”

  “Well thank you, kitten.” He kisses the top of my head and grabs his things and walks out. I see him out the window, talking to a few smokers. I see a few girls close by, each one of them trying to be subtle in getting his attention.

  “What are you looking at?” Kendra nudges my arm.

  “Nothing, why?”

  “Girls at this school are crazy. I don’t know how they have the energy to ac
t all phony just to get a guy. I am old fashioned, if a guy likes you he will ask you out, if not then it wasn’t meant to be. No hair twirling and batting of the eyelashes will make a difference.”

  “Yeah, I walked up to Kendra and just came out and asked her on a date. If a guy really likes a girl, he will make a move.” Kendra kisses Jayce’s cheek.

  “These girls, though, they have no life.” Kendra looks back out the window.

  “Jackson does get tired of girls throwing themselves at him. He doesn’t mind if he is on the prowl but you saw him, he can’t even eat lunch without some girl hitting on him. People think he’s a dickhead but he is polite and tries to be as nice as possible, but if every girl bothered me as much as they bothered him, I don’t think I would be as nice.”

  “You would love to get all that attention,” Kendra scoffs at him.

  I stand and gather my things. “Well, thank you for sharing about the crazy girls on campus but I need to head to class. I’ll catch you later.” I wave to them as they continue talking and when I pass Jackson, he calls out to me, asking me to wait.

  “I hope you weren’t heading to class without me?” He puts his arm around my shoulders.

  I put my hand over my heart. “Me? Never.” We laugh. We are almost at the classroom when a very pretty girl with long, light brown hair in a short skirt walks by, smiling at him. He smiles back and eyes her up.

  “I will meet you in class in just a moment.” I watch him jog after the girl.

  He didn’t come to class and I don’t know why it bothers me so much. I guess I have just gotten used to him sitting next to me and whispering things throughout. I can’t believe he missed class over a girl. .

  Probably still doesn’t.

  Okay, I’m being harsh now.

  It shouldn’t bother me if he misses class or not.

  I’m not his keeper.

  The professor ends class and I feel like my hand has cramped up from writing so much. I leave class and am walking across campus when I hear my name being called. I turn to see Dante smiling at me.