The Widow of Papina

by Katie Hamstead

  “Because, I’m not. Maybe you should just remember that.” I turned back to the dinner. He compared me to his ex? The one who, according to Megan, laughed in his face when he asked her to marry him? That made me angry, so I hacked at the chicken to vent it. “Why don’t you just fix the dishwasher and hold back on being sympathetic or whatever it is you’re trying to do?”

  He groaned and leaned over the dishwasher. “We’ll never get along, will we?”

  “Not with you comparing me to your ex, no,” I snapped, slamming the knife down on the chicken. “This is a small town, don’t think I haven’t been told what happened.”

  He flinched. “Sarah or Megan?”

  “Does it matter?”

  “Not really, no.” He clunked at the dishwasher. “I’m sure everyone thinks I’m a complete idiot for not seeing it. I’m sure Sarah saw it when I brought her here because she was horrible to her. I should have paid more attention.”

  “You can’t give up because of one bad experience,” I said, dumping the chicken into the fry pan. “I never would have met Forrest if that were the case. My boyfriend before him did not like me for me, he just thought I was pretty and wanted a trophy bride to take home and please his parents. I was lucky I got out when I did, and a few months later, I met Forrest who gave me everything he hadn’t.”

  The noise of him working stopped. I looked across and saw him staring off.

  “Maybe you could give Sarah a chance.”

  His eyes shot to me. “What?”

  “Sarah. I know she asked you on a date but it didn’t happen.”

  He flushed. “I . . . well, things came up.”

  “There’s nothing stopping you now.”

  “Mmm.” He returned his focus back to the dishwasher.

  We worked in silence until I started serving, and I reached for the plates. I paused, debating whether to ask him to stay or not. He’d been working hard, and he didn’t expect to be paid, so it was the least I could do. “Um, Sheriff?”

  “Paul,” he muttered.

  “Do you want to have dinner with us?”

  He looked up from the dishwasher. “You want me to stay for dinner?”

  “Well, it’s the least I can do for helping me out.”

  He leaned back, resting his hands on the floor and leaning against them. “If I get dinner for helping, I think I’ll come every night to fix something.”

  I rolled my eyes. “You could have just said no.”

  “Ah, no, I meant yes, I was just saying a good meal every day would be—”

  “Don’t expect to show up, fix something, and be fed.”

  He moaned. “You’re so obnoxious.”

  “I just . . . ugh!” I pulled out four plates and set them down with a crash. “Fine, come every day and fix something and I’ll feed you. Your ever-so-charming company would be a pleasure to host.”

  He chuckled. “You’re welcome.”

  “Ugh!” I dumped a spoon of pasta on the first plate. “Sarah can have you if it will get you out from under my skin.”

  He chuckled again.

  I spun and hurried to the stairs. “Dinner’s ready!” I bellowed angrily. When I returned to the kitchen, he smirked.

  “Wash your hands,” I snapped.

  “Yes ma’am.” He jumped to his feet and rushed to the kitchen sink.

  I growled and stepped up beside him to finish serving. “So, are you really going to come every night?”

  “Unless I’m busy. I go home by myself and eat by myself. Having a real meal with people would be nice. Plus, after that man harassed you back in August, I promised Forrest I’d look out for you, and I keep my promises.”

  I sighed. “Forrest always did worry about me too much.”

  “Bray . . . ”

  Nova shoved between us and grabbed her plate. I lifted one for Mom and myself and walked to the table. Mom set Jackson in the highchair and gave him a couple of toys. “He needs to be fed after you eat,” she said to me.

  “Thanks, Mom.”

  Mom dominated the conversation at the table, which I appreciated. I didn’t want to talk to the Sheriff anymore, and I could tell by the filthy looks Nova kept giving him, she didn’t even want him in the house. So, once we finished dinner, I handed Nova the plates so she could start her chore washing the dishes.

  “One moment.” The Sheriff leapt up and jiggled with the dishwasher for a moment, before he reattached the hose. “Load her up and see if she works.”

  Nova glared at him before looking to me. I nodded. She snorted and started loading it. He tried to help her but she shoved him away. She filled it, and hit the buttons to start it up. It whirred to life and Mom let out a cheer.

  “I’m glad I earned my keep,” he said, before scanning the kitchen. “I’ll fix the shingles on the weekend, but what can I do tomorrow?”

  “You can replace all the broken light bulbs,” Mom said before I had a chance to open my mouth. “And, some wood needs to be chopped for the fireplace.”

  “Mom,” I moaned, seeing Nova’s wide startled eyes.

  He shrugged. “I can do those, no problem.”

  I frowned at him. “Fine. Is there anything in particular you like to eat?”

  He grinned as his eyes locked with mine. “I believe you have a slab of elk in your freezer.”

  I scowled. “You talk to too many people.” I stood and plucked up Jackson. “Elk it is. I just hope I don’t ruin it.”

  “Cut it into stakes.”

  I paused, gritting my teeth. “Fine.”

  “Okay, what else can I do before I go?”

  Nova growled and hurried up the stairs.

  “I agree,” I muttered as I followed her up and Mom showed him something to do, and I didn’t actually care what. I nursed Jackson as I stared at the picture of Forrest I’d hung on his wall so he wouldn’t forget his Dad. Everyone believed he was dead now, and I began to believe it, too. My heart ached, and I silently let the tears fall. How could I move on? How could I let go of the hope that he was still out there?

  I needed to get Nova to talk. She had to know what happened, and I needed her to tell me. I decided right then I’d look into counseling for her first thing in the morning. I also needed to get serious about home schooling. The problem was, I had no idea how to teach most subjects. As an editor I could do English, but history, science, math, and any extracurricular she might choose, would be beyond me. I needed to get in contact with some of the teachers around town.

  Looking down at Jackson, I found him asleep. So, I rested him in his crib and tip toed out. As I turned, I jumped, finding Nova stood behind me. She pointed downstairs and pursed her lips.

  “What’s wrong?”

  She pointed again and stomped her foot.

  “Nova, I don’t understand.”

  She huffed and drew a star on her chest.

  “The sheriff?”

  She nodded and pointed to the door.

  “Why can’t you just tell me?”

  She shook her head.

  “Nova, why won’t you speak?”

  She pursed her lips and pointed at the door again.

  “Why don’t you like the sheriff?”

  She rolled her eyes.

  “Really? You expect me to know what that means?”

  “Urgh!” She threw her hands in the air then pretended to point a gun at me.

  “He pointed a gun at you?”

  She nodded, resting her hands on her hips.

  “When?”

  She twitched her nose, and by the pain in her eyes it had to be one of the times she’d done something wrong.

  “Was it the armed robbery incident?”

  Several emotions flashed in her eyes at
once; anger, sadness, fear.

  “Did anyone get shot?”

  She patted her chest and pulled her jeans down enough to show me a scar on her hip.

  “Oh.”

  She grabbed my hand and gestured at the door again.

  “Okay, I’ll send him away, but I will warn you he’ll be coming back frequently to fix things.” I sighed and rubbed my eyes. “To be completely honest, it’s a relief because I can’t afford a handyman. Without Forrest’s income . . . ”

  She grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at her. She touched her chest, then mine.

  “Ah . . . are you saying you’ll take care of me?”

  She nodded and smiled.

  “Oh, Nova.” I stroked her cheek. “Honey, you’re fourteen. You should be thinking about boys and school assignments, not taking care of me. I’ll work something out, don’t you worry.”

  She shook her head and touched her chest, then mine again.

  “No, Nova. I’m going to get you enrolled in a home schooling program and you’re going to work your butt off so you can go to college like Forrest wanted.”

  Her eyes flashed with frustration. She shook her head and hurried back into her room where her music turned on and blasted around the house. I knocked on the door and bellowed, “Jackson’s sleeping.”

  The music instantly turned down.

  “Thank you.”

  I walked down the stairs and found Mom and the sheriff in the front room getting the fire going. I collapsed on the couch and moaned. My whole body ached, while my mind just wanted to switch off.

  “Did you put Jackson down?” Mom asked.

  “Yeah, it’s after eight so . . . ”

  “You didn’t bathe him?”

  “No.”

  “Bray.”

  “Mom, I’m tired.”

  She sighed and sat beside me. “Why don’t you go to bed?”

  “Maybe in a few.” I rested my arm across my forehead. But, I heard the sheriff shuffle and I sat up. “You didn’t tell me you shot Nova.”

  Mom gasped.

  He didn’t even flinch. “She would have shot me if I didn’t.”

  “What happened?”

  He shrugged and prodded the fire. “She and her mother were holding up a gas station up on the highway, so I was called in with a few others to end it. I went in and she turned her gun on me, yelling that if I came any closer she’d shoot. I froze, but she shot at me anyway. So, I shot to disarm her. She fell and her mother split. I hurried to remove the gun from her and stop the bleeding, but we haven’t seen her mother since.”

  “No wonder she wants me to kick you out.”

  He looked at me. “She spoke?”

  I shook my head. “Lots of gestures.”

  “Oh.” He stood. “I should go anyway.”

  “Wait!” Mom shot to her feet. “We have some muffins I baked earlier you can take with you for breakfast.” She hurried out of the room.

  I stood and walked him to the door.

  He paused and turned to me. “I’m going to take Sarah out, like you said.”

  I smiled. “She’d like that.”

  “I think it’s time to move on.” He smirked. “It’s long overdue.” He opened the door.

  “Paul, here.” Mom bustled back into the room and handed him several muffins inside a Tupperware container.

  He grasped his hat off the hook and pulled it on. “Thank you, ladies, for all the food.” He turned and stepped out, and I shut the door as he walked to his truck.

  Chapter 9

  “Nova, get up.”

  Nova groaned and tried to hit me with her pillow.

  I snatched it away. “Get up. I don’t want to be late.”

  She moaned and sat up.

  “Make sure you wear something nice. No jeans and no sweaters.”

  She scoffed.

  I turned to her, pressing my hands against my hips. “I just bought you some nice clothes so don’t give me that.”

  She stood and shoved me out the door.

  “You have half an hour.”

  She grunted and shut the door.

  Mom tugged her suitcase out the door of the office. She frowned at me as she looked me over. “I wish I could stay longer.”

  “Me, too.” I glanced at the nursery as Jackson started fussing. “But, Dad needs you, too.”

  She wrapped her arms around me. “I’m so proud of you. You’re being so strong.”

  What else am I going to do? “Thanks, Mom.”

  Hammering started on the roof and both our eyes shot up. “This is the third Saturday in a row,” Mom said. “Doesn’t he have anything better to do?”

  “I guess not.”

  “Didn’t he have a date last night?”

  I grinned. “Oh yeah. I’m going to have to find Sarah later.”

  Nova plodded out, her arms full of clothes. She looked up at me and huffed.

  “Yes, you don’t like him, I know. But, he’s out there and you’re in here. You don’t have to see him. Now go get in the shower.”

  She turned and slammed the door behind her.

  Mom frowned and lifted her bag. “It’s someone else’s third Saturday in a row, but she’s not progressing as well as him.”

  “Mom.” I hurried in to Jackson to change him and she followed. “She’ll need time.”

  “I know.” She handed me a new diaper. “He just turned six months.”

  I paused. That meant Forrest had been missing for three months. He’d missed Christmas and New Year’s several months earlier and I’d hid in my room and cried on and off. But, I’d done everything I could to be happy for Jackson’s first Christmas, and with Sarah living with us at the time, she’d really lifted me up.

  I took a deep breath and slipped Jackson’s onesie on him. “I can’t believe it’s been six months.”

  “It’s coming back into summer,” she said. “It was beautiful here when you first arrived. All this snow has been terribly depressing. I wish I could stay and see spring.”

  I smiled, grateful for her not mentioning Forrest, but focusing on something beautiful. I had to admit, the winter did drag, especially because I wasn’t used to snow . . . and with Forrest gone.

  I finished dressing Jackson and lifted him up. “Hi, handsome.”

  He grinned.

  I snuggled him against my shoulder, wishing so much that Forrest could see how much he’d grown. I sat in the rocking chair and set up to nurse. Mom hurried downstairs and brought me some breakfast to eat. “Thanks, Mom. I’m going to miss you.”

  She kissed my head. “Don’t get me started, Bray.”

  Finally, we headed outside to get in the car. Mom went out to put her suitcase in the back, while I started the heater and buckled in Jackson. “Nova, hurry up,” I called.

  The sheriff waved to us and climbed down. “Off to Bearville again?”

  I nodded. “It’s a weekly appointment.”

  “But, this time you’re leaving us.” He smiled at Mom and offered her his hand. “It’s been a pleasure.”

  Beaming, she shook his hand. “You, too, Paul. It makes it easier for me to leave knowing the town is looking out for my daughter.”

  “We’re a tight knit community.” He turned to me. “Do you need someone to move back in with you?”

  I shook my head. “I’ve had someone with me for three months. I think it’s time I start doing this on my own.”

  “But, with Jackson and Nova . . . ”

  “I’ll be fine, really. Nova has been great the past few weeks.”

  “I could just—”

  “Sheriff, please—”

  “I’m off duty, Bray.”

  “I’m a
grown woman. I can take care of myself and Nova and Jackson. We’ll be fine.”

  He raised his eyebrow. “I guess I’ll keep coming to fix things so I can check on you regularly.”

  “There you go.” I shut Jackson’s door, and noticed Nova scowl when she saw the sheriff beside me. “We need to get going.”

  He walked around the car, checking the chains on the tires. “I really wish you’d trade this in for a four-wheel drive.”

  “Sheriff—”

  “It’s Paul, Bray.”

  “I don’t need a four-wheel drive. I drive on the roads and barely have enough money to cover the cost of gas as it is.”

  “I’m sure one of the ranchers—”

  I pressed my fist against my hip. “I’m fine. Would you stop worrying? You’re worse than Forrest.”

  His brow twitched. “Okay. Just be careful. The snow is melting which makes for slick roads.”

  “Thank you, and I will.” I walked around and opened the driver’s door.

  He caught my elbow. “I should finish on the shingles today, and I’ve noticed your insulation needs to be redone. Would you like me to—”

  “Go ahead.” I didn’t want to talk to him anymore, the clock was ticking. “I left the house unlocked, so help yourself if you’re hungry.”

  He stepped back and tipped his hat. “Much obliged.”

  I rolled my eyes. “You’re so backward.” I slipped into the car and started the engine. As we drove off, he gave us a wave.

  We sat silently for the first few minutes, just listening to Jackson babble away. In the rear-view mirror, I caught Nova holding a toy out for him. I smiled.

  Mom cleared her throat. “So, Paul seems rather preoccupied with your safety.”

  I snorted. “Yes, he’s taking his promise to Forrest to keep me safe much too seriously.”

  “I think it’s more than that.” She leaned closer with a sly smile. “I think he likes you.”

  I glanced in the mirror again and saw Nova staring at me. “No, he doesn’t. I’m married, and he took Sarah out last night.”

  “Because you told him to.”

  “Mom!”

  She sighed. “I’m just saying.”