Sisters in White

by Melissa Foster

  “So, Lacy, do you work?” She must have felt Danica’s eyes on her, because a second later Danica felt the side of Kaylie’s shoe impale her calf.

  Blake put his hand on Danica’s thigh and squeezed. Between the kick and the squeeze, she realized that she hadn’t been dreaming. Kaylie had really spoken to Lacy.

  “Oh, me?” Lacy patted her mouth with a napkin. “I’m in advertising. I work for World Geographic as a senior advertising exec.” She lowered her eyes, and Danica found herself warming toward Lacy’s humble demeanor more and more.

  “Wow, senior, huh? How old are you again?”

  It was a loaded question, and Danica’s body went stiff. Blake took his hand from her thigh and brought it up to her shoulder, pulling her closer. How could he possibly know she needed his strength?

  “Twenty-six,” Lacy said, her eyes darting to their father.

  Madeline set down her fork and watched Kaylie’s reaction, as did Danica and Chaz; there was a quick nod, a clenching of her jaw.

  “Your father and I have known each other since before you girls were born. We grew up together,” Madeline said softly, while looking directly at Kaylie.

  Danica dropped her hand beneath the table and took Kaylie’s hand in her own, silently hoping the knowledge that she was there would center Kaylie the way Blake centered her.

  Madeline continued. “We dated briefly when we were in high school, before he met your mother.” She looked at their father, whose unwavering gaze remained on his half-empty wineglass. “When your grandfather died and your father came to settle his estate, we...reconnected.”

  Grandpa died when I was four. Kaylie was two. I don’t even really remember him. Oh God. We were just babies. Dad, how could you?

  “Maddy,” their father pleaded.

  “No, Don, they have a right to know, and if you can’t communicate with your daughters, then I will.”

  “You don’t have to, really—”

  Madeline cut Danica off with a firm shake of her head. “Yes, yes, I do. Kaylie.” It was a soft demand for attention, not a request. “I’m not going to pretend this isn’t awkward, or that what we did was right. It wasn’t.”

  “Mom,” Lacy whispered a harsh warning.

  “No, baby, it’s okay. It has to be said.”

  Danica watched Kaylie eyeing their father as he took Lacy’s hand, his gaze locking on Lacy with a silent apology. Kaylie’s eyes narrowed.

  Shit. We deserve that apology as much as she does.

  Kaylie dug her nails in to the back of Danica’s hand beneath the table.

  “We hurt your family, and your mother—”

  Kaylie cut Madeline off with a shaky, firm voice. “Don’t you talk about my mother.”

  Madeline nodded. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean anything bad. I just mean that I know there was a lot of hurt doled out, and it wasn’t our intent—”

  Danica squeezed Kaylie’s hand as her sister began to rise from her seat. Kaylie settled back down, and Chaz put his arm around Kaylie and pulled her closer, just as Blake had done to Danica. Thank God. What the hell is Madeline doing? Why now?

  No sooner had she asked herself the question than Madeline answered. “Okay, look.” She sat up taller, laced her shaking hands together and set them on the table.

  Please have the grace and tact of Blythe Danner. Please, please. Danica had a momentary vision of Kaylie jumping across the table with a wild scream, clawing at Madeline’s eyes. She shook the image from her head and tried to hear past the rush of adrenaline coursing through her veins.

  “What happened, happened. We can’t change that. No matter how much we wish the circumstances could have been different, they weren’t. Your father was married, and he and I broke his vows.”

  Kaylie’s nostrils flared, and Danica held her hand even tighter, hoping to sway her attention toward her for just a second, but Kaylie had Madeline in her sights, and there’d be no distracting her from her prey.

  “Lacy is not, and I repeat not, responsible for any of this,” Madeline continued.

  “I get that you’re protecting your child. I’d do the same for my two children.” Kaylie’s voice was thick with self-control that Danica did not recognize. “But whatever happened didn’t just happen. You had a choice. He had a choice.” Spears shot from her eyes to her father’s. “Everyone had a frickin’ choice in this matter except for me and Danica.” She pushed her chair out from the table and threw her napkin down. “And Lacy,” she added before storming out of the restaurant.

  Chapter Ten

  Danica caught up to Kaylie and Chaz out on the veranda. Kaylie’s head rested on Chaz’s chest, her hands clasped together beneath her chin as she nestled within his arms like a frightened child. Her sobs could be heard from the doorway, where Danica stood, contemplating her place in the intimate scene.

  Chaz spotted her, and his worried eyes drew her closer.

  “Kaylie,” she said softly.

  Kaylie turned her face away from Danica, and Danica felt a fissure form across her heart. She stepped closer and touched her sister’s back. The rattle of her lungs as she sobbed vibrated beneath her fingertips. Danica rested her cheek against Kaylie’s back and wrapped her arms around her. There were no words that needed to be said, no fixing of something that had been broken for far too long. Kaylie had a right to feel every emotion that tore at her soul, and Danica wondered why she wasn’t feeling each one just as strongly. Had her years of being a therapist hardened her? Had she simply had more time to digest it all during the last year and a half of long phone calls and intimate letters passed between her and Lacy? Had she felt all those things when she first reached out to Lacy? Or was she repressing every nasty feeling she didn’t want to deal with? That notion scared the daylights out of her and she pulled back. As she stood there watching the pain that her sister was dealing with, she couldn’t deny that she’d brought this to Nassau with them. Danica had been the one to push for her father’s invitation. The idea that she’d made an irreversible mistake burned in the pit of her stomach.

  It was Kaylie’s hand on her own that pulled her back into the embrace. Kaylie untangled herself from Chaz and looked up at him with sad eyes. She laid her palm gently on his chin and whispered through her tears, “Can you give us a second? Please?”

  That one little touch from Kaylie unleashed a ripple of guilt and pain that Danica hadn’t realized she’d been holding back. Kaylie wrapped her arms around her and held on tight. The lump that had formed in Danica’s throat was quickly replaced with quick gasps of breaths as the pain and guilt combined into a rush of heartache. They were the sisters that had been left behind, and no matter how much Danica tried to forget it, Kaylie’s pain brought it home.

  Chaz leaned down and kissed her trembling lips. “I’ll be right here.” He pointed to a chair on the other end of the veranda. Blake came onto the porch and Chaz intercepted him.

  Kaylie clung to Danica like a lifeline while they cried, their tears falling relentlessly, both powerless to stop the years of repressed hurt and anger from pouring out of their souls.

  “It’s okay,” Danica soothed her, stroking the back of her hair. “We’ll be okay.” She felt Kaylie exhale; the tension she’d been holding on to since their father had arrived began to ease from her shoulders.

  “I hate this,” Kaylie sobbed.

  “I know. I know, baby. It’s okay.” Each tear brought with it a painful memory. The phone call from her mother. I shouldn’t admit this, but I feel lost without him. Kaylie’s frantic, angry call later that night. Dad’s such a dick! Danica’s own repression of her feelings. Who can I tell? In the end, she hadn’t told a soul. Kaylie had been graduating from college and Danica was embarking on her career as a therapist. The years between then and now seemed to have disappeared, and she relived the anguish anew.

  Kaylie squeezed her tighter as she inhaled deeply and exhaled again.

  “I know, Kay. Just let it out.” Let it out, Danica. Let it out. Danica felt the
lump in her throat expand and then burst into loud, pain-filled sobs, convoluting her thoughts and stealing her resolve to be strong for her sister. Knowing she was falling apart and unable to help Kaylie, she tightened her muscles, and slowly, as if pieces of a puzzle were sifting from space down into her body, she began to gather her determination piece by piece, layer by layer. Creating the strength to clear the tears that brought the unwanted emotions. The strength that guided her hand to Kaylie’s chin and gave her the courage to look into her red-rimmed eyes.

  “You’re okay. We’re okay,” Danica assured her. They were the words she’d said to her so long ago, when Kaylie lashed out at everyone except her. When Kaylie began lashing out at herself, Danica realized. She searched her sister for the understanding of what Danica was only just then realizing and came back empty.

  “Let it go, Kay. Let this go.”

  She wiped Kaylie’s tears with the pad of her thumb. Kaylie drew away from her, her hands still clinging to Danica’s upper arms. She sniffled and hiccupped as she tried to quell her tears and take control of her trembling body. Danica watched determination work its way back into her sister’s eyes. She saw straight into her soul, and what she saw, she felt within the energy of her own body: a hurt so deep that nothing would ever take it away. Danica’s years as a therapist had better prepared her for cataloging away the hurt and moving forward, but as she looked at Kaylie, she knew nothing would fill the void of knowing they were not the chosen ones. Nothing would fix the hurt they saw, felt, and tried to fix in their mother’s heart. Nothing could take away the image of their mother holding herself together for their sake after their father had moved away to begin a new life with Madeline and Lacy, leaving her behind with nothing more than two grown daughters and an empty house. Danica also saw, as she stared into the well of Kaylie’s eyes, a tenderness and strength that vied to come alive once again but was restrained by something Danica did not feel in her own body. Something Kaylie seemed to be contemplating as well, as she pulled her hands away from Danica, using her forearms to swipe angrily at her remaining tears. Contemplating as she pulled her shoulders back and grit her teeth, seething in such a way that Danica feared what Kaylie might do next.

  She shot a worried look at Chaz and Blake, who stood from their seats, ready for flight or fight. Desire to protect their women’s hearts was written in their flexing muscles and clenched jaws.

  “She doesn’t deserve this,” Kaylie spat, then stomped from the room and marched right back into the restaurant—Danica, Blake, and Chaz on her heels.

  “Kaylie, don’t.” Danica had no idea what Kaylie was intent on doing, but she knew her little sister well enough to know that if Kaylie wanted to take down the entire resort, she could do it with very few words, perfectly timed, with expert inflection.

  Kaylie stalked across the restaurant and grabbed Lacy’s arm, yanking her to her feet, ignoring the tears streaming down Lacy’s cheeks. Kaylie hooked her arm through Lacy’s, giving her no chance to escape.

  “We’re outta here,” Kaylie said. She dragged Lacy out of the restaurant, leaving their stunned father and Madeline alone to wonder what the hell had just happened.

  Chapter Eleven

  The night sky was clear, but Danica felt the angst of the evening weighing her down like a wet, woolen shawl. She was torn between remaining with her sisters, Chaz, and Blake, sitting around a picnic-style table on the patio of a little bar down the street from the hotel, and returning to the hotel to make sure her father was okay. The hell with it. She downed another tropical drink.

  An hour later, and three sheets to the wind, she looked across the table as the ocean breeze kicked up and blew both Lacy’s and Kaylie’s hair across their faces. They laughed at something Chaz said, and Kaylie reached up and moved the hair from Lacy’s cheek. Danica realized that there was no place else she’d rather be, even if she wasn’t really sure what was going on. Her sister had all but abducted Lacy.

  She sighed as she took another sip of her drink. Even if she had invited him to the wedding, her father had made his own bed years ago. Let him lie in it, swallowed by guilt and strangled by the knowledge that he hurt us. He didn’t ruin us—not any of us.

  “I’m telling you, you didn’t do it. He did,” Kaylie said.

  Uh-oh, maybe he did.

  “No. No, no, no.” Lacy swayed from too much alcohol. “I was a mistake. If I hadn’t come along, then who knows? Your parents might still be together.”

  Kaylie put her arm around Lacy’s shoulder. “Honey, you were a product of what fucked up our life. You are not what fucked it up.”

  “Awww,” Lacy said, resting her forehead against Kaylie’s cheek.

  “Even if you hadn’t been born, they’d still have been together.” Kaylie gulped down the remainder of her drink. “Behind my mother’s back.” She threw her head back and took another swig, dribbling it down her chin. “And we were so stupid. We thought he was on business trips, ’cause he’d bring us chocolate and shit.” She lifted her glass in Danica’s direction. “Remember that? Ghirardelli? Oh yeah, like he’d been to San Francisco. Right. Fuckin’ San Francisco.” She didn’t wait for Danica to answer. Kaylie slammed her glass down on the table. “They fucked us all up. Every one of us.” Kaylie drew a circle in the air with her glass, spilling her drink on the table with a giggle.

  “Fuckers,” Lacy spat, then quickly covered her mouth with her hand. Her eyes grew wide. “Oh my gosh. I didn’t mean to say that. I don’t talk like that.”

  They didn’t fuck us up. We’re just fine, or at least we will be.

  Blake and Chaz looked on with amusement, and Danica’s attention turned to her man. She was compelled to drink more—to drink in every inch of him. His mouth moved slowly, sexily, as he said something to Chaz that Danica could not make out. She caught Blake’s eye and licked her lips seductively. Or at least she thought she did. The right side of his mouth lifted into a playful smile. She dunked her finger in her drink and then sucked the sweet nectar from her skin.

  Kaylie’s voice broke through her drunken reverie. “It’s them. They make you use that foul, disgusting language. They made me, too. Right, Danica?”

  Danica blinked, coming back to the present. Oh God, what did I just do? Why is Blake looking at me like a starved wolf? Did Kaylie just call me foul and disgusting? She tried to shake the alcohol from her head.

  “Right, Danica? It was them who made us use that foul, disgusting language. They fucked us up.”

  Oh, thank God. She lifted her glass. “Damn right, sis,” she said, and eyed Blake, who still had that hungry look in his eyes. Danica put her drink down and felt a cool breeze across her wet finger. She closed her eyes. Oh, Danica. You didn’t. She opened her eyes and looked at Blake. He licked his lips and his socked foot found her leg beneath the table. Oh, yes, I did.

  They stumbled back to their rooms on the arms of their men, Lacy’s arms linked between Danica’s and Kaylie’s. It was well past two o’clock in the morning, and Danica’s head swam. She had to be up to meet her mother, Camille, and the rest of their guests at—she couldn’t remember what time the next day.

  Suddenly they stopped in middle of the hall. “This is me,” Lacy said, dropping the girls’ arms and pointing to a door.

  “No, honey, you’re not a door.” Kaylie bent over, laughing, taking Lacy with her. “A door! You’re not a door; you’re my sister.”

  The hallway silenced, and all eyes focused on Kaylie as she chewed on her own words. Her jaw moving from side to side, her eyebrows drawing together, then relaxing again. She pulled herself upright and put one hand on Lacy’s shoulder. Danica wanted to move to Lacy’s side, but her legs would not obey. Thank God for Blake, who seemed to be the only thing holding her upright at the moment.

  “You’re not a door,” Kaylie repeated. “You’re my sister.”

  Tears streamed silently down Lacy’s cheeks. She wiped them away and dropped her eyes. “You might not feel that way tomorrow,” she said in w
hat sounded to Danica to be a much-too-sober voice for having had as much to drink as they had.

  Kaylie flung her hand around Lacy and tugged her against her chest. “I shall remember, sis.” Her eyes connected with Danica’s, passing a silent acknowledgment between them. “I shall remember.”

  Danica collapsed on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “Please tell me I did not just dream that.”

  Blake lay next to her, the liquor-sweet smell of his breath infiltrating Danica’s senses. “Tell me I did not just dream this.” He took her finger and put it in his mouth, then sucked it as he drew it out slowly.

  “I kinda remember something along those lines,” she admitted. “I think you’re making me into a sex maniac.”

  “Maybe you dreamed that you want to be a sex maniac.” Blake slid off the bed and pulled his shirt off over his head, flinging it across the room.

  Danica licked her lips at the sight of his naked chest.

  He removed her shoes, running his hands along her legs and up her inner thighs. “I seem to remember a certain someone falling off her too-high heels one night.”

  Danica smiled at the memory of one evening shortly after they’d first met. She was stone-cold drunk when they’d left Bar None, he with a girl on each arm, her alone. Danica had fallen off of her high heels and twisted her ankle. Blake appeared out of nowhere, without his two beautiful blondes, sweetly removed her heels and inspected her ankle, and they’d shared a steamy, flirtatious moment. She’d wanted it to be so much more.

  “I see you remember that night, too,” he said, kissing each of her toes and working his way up her left calf. “What do you say we play out what might have happened that night had we not been...”

  Danica had closed her eyes when he was kissing her leg, and now she opened one eye and looked down at him. The hunger in his eyes pulled open her other eye. “What? Not been what?”