The Ladies’ Secrets: A Historical Regency Romance Box Set

by Ayles, Abby

  John could not help but feel protective of his sister. He certainly did not appreciate Miss Natalie attempting to talk her up to Mr. Cleary.

  Aside from the vulgarity of matchmaking in the first place, Mr. Cleary was not the kind of man that John wanted his younger sister marrying. Emma wished for a gentle man, and it was nothing less than she deserved.

  To pair Emma with a man like Cleary, one who longed for the spotlight and wanted to be engaged constantly in battles of wit, would be a most ill-thought-out match.

  It was clear to him what Miss Natalie was doing and he could not allow that behavior any longer. He would have to see to it that he spoke with her tomorrow morning.

  It was a rare privilege that, as her fiancé, he might take a turn about the garden with her with her elder sister giving them some space. It meant he could have a more private conversation with her.

  He would simply take her out for a turn about the garden and explain matters to her. He was not going to have his poor sister set up in such a fashion. Nor would he have his future wife accidentally putting herself in the path of Cleary.

  If, of course, Cleary was behaving the way that John feared he was and John was not simply overreacting.

  “That is a fine young lady to whom you are engaged,” Cleary said, as if he was reading John’s mind.

  John set down his card and indicated to Edward that it was his turn.

  “She has a great wit and beauty, does she not?” Cleary continued.

  Edward raised an eyebrow at John as if to ask him if he was going to continue to tolerate such words. John sighed inwardly. Edward could have a temper when he wished. Rather like John himself.

  “I should hope she has both,” John said, “Else I would not have proposed to her.”

  “I am surprised she had not already been engaged,” Cleary continued.

  “Really, sir, is this the best subject of conversation?” Edward asked.

  Mr. Hunsford looked across the table at John, a sympathetic look on his face. No doubt he had been subject to similarly frustrating and possibly embarrassing conversations with Cleary over the time that John had been away.

  “I am merely making conversation,” Cleary replied. “You know we had all wondered if your brother would ever find himself a bride. And here he strolls in with this radiant flower.

  “Tell me, my lord, where did you meet her?”

  “At the Morrisons,” John replied, leaving out that it was at the masquerade ball. Even those who were not invited to attend heard of the annual masquerade ball. Cleary would know when it was and therefore would know that John and Miss Natalie had only just met a few days ago.

  “Ah. They are a fine couple, are they not?”

  From there Edward quickly steered the conversation towards safer topics. John, however, could not completely erase the pounding of his heart.

  Whether it made sense or not, he felt protective of Miss Natalie. Jealous at the idea that another man should try to take her from him. He wanted to shake Cleary and ask him to speak plain and just admit that he wanted Miss Natalie for himself, and then drag him outside where they could settle this properly.

  Ridiculous of him, he knew. To feel so possessive over a woman he hardly knew, his future wife or no, and to want to start a fight with another man over it.

  Cleary was harmless in the end, John knew. But he must warn Miss Natalie not to encourage him and certainly not in the direction of Emma. Not when Emma would be unhappy with such a man and her affections already lay elsewhere.

  Not to mention that her behavior at the dinner had not been that of a proper lady. He had felt Edward’s eyes on him the entire time, as if his brother was questioning him about his choice of her.

  It was clear that Miss Natalie had little patience for Mrs. Hapson. She was a woman who could talk the ear off a mule but she was good-hearted and alone, with no one. Why begrudge her conversation or excitement over a new person to meet?

  There was of course the matchmaking. Completely out of line. And then her behavior with Cleary which, although John suspected was so that she might gain his confidence and advise him better in pursuing Emma, could also be seen as flirtatious.

  Also—and perhaps this was splitting hairs but—she talked altogether too much. She spoke of London and the fashions and all the balls that she had attended. She gossiped about people, skirting the edge of polite conversation.

  When someone else was speaking, it was obvious that Miss Natalie was only waiting for them to end so that she might speak up once again. Her eyes were glazed as she listened, suggesting that she was spending the time formulating her own next comment.

  It was most unfortunate behavior.

  He must speak with her in the morning. Put an end to all of this. He would not have a wife who behaved in such a manner. It was going to reflect badly on him. Especially to Father.

  No, this all must be nipped in the bud. Miss Natalie had to learn to grow up or this entire affair would end in disaster.

  Chapter 21

  Natalie rose the next morning planning fully on lying in bed until the bell rang for breakfast.

  Unlike Bridget or Louisa who were up in the morning sending letters, Natalie detested the morning. She always slept in as long as she could.

  This morning, however, when she woke up Louisa was all but standing over her waiting.

  “What is it?” Natalie asked.

  “Lord Ridgecleff has asked that you walk with him about the grounds,” Louisa said. “We have both been awake for some time waiting for you.”

  Oh, dear. It wouldn’t do to keep Lord Ridgecleff waiting, not if she wanted to stay on his good side.

  “I’ll be up in a moment.”

  Natalie glanced at the clock. Honestly, who was up before nine in the morning anyhow? The milkmaids, those were the only people who should be up and about.

  She dressed quickly in a simple frock and hurried downstairs. Louisa was talking quietly with Lord Ridgecleff in the library.

  “I’m afraid Natalie doesn’t read much,” Louisa was saying.

  Natalie paused just outside the doorframe, pressing herself against the wall. They were talking about her.

  “I’m sure I read enough for the both of us,” Lord Ridgecleff replied. “It is not so much our differing habits that I fear.

  “I know that I can go on walks on my own. I can read and enjoy books on my own. I can find other people to discuss those books with that are not my wife.”

  “That does not mean that you should not wish to share these things with her.”

  It sounded as though Louisa was reassuring Lord Ridgecleff. Natalie felt her stomach drop. Was she failing so much already that her sister had to reassure a man she barely knew?

  She didn’t know how to feel. Angry. Self-righteous, even. If Lord Ridgecleff didn’t want a wife who was energetic and sociable then he shouldn’t have chosen her.

  But she also felt…small. Shriveled up inside. Inadequate. Was she not enough for him? Just as she was? Did she not enchant him?

  Could it have been that all this time she was nothing more than a shell? Men fell for her pretty face and then saw what was in her heart and head and walked away.

  The thought terrified her. She wanted to be more than that.

  If only they were still in London. If only she wasn’t stuck here in this boring place with boring people for company.

  She had to matchmake Miss Ridgecleff with Mr. Cleary. And the earl had seemed to like her. If she could continue to see him and stay in his good graces that would go a long way with Lord Ridgecleff as well.

  She had to prove herself. She had to. She would not be forced to break off this engagement and become a laughingstock.

  Louisa and Lord Ridgecleff’s voices faded and Natalie realized their conversation must be winding down.

  She entered the room, acting as though she had not been there and had not heard a thing. “I apologize for keeping you waiting,” she said. “Shall we?”

  Lord Rid
gecleff stood upon her entrance, bowing. Louisa stood as well, but more in preparation to go outside than anything else.

  Natalie gave a small curtsy. “My lord, I am ready to go out if you are.”

  Lord Ridgecleff nodded curtly. “Let us, then.”

  He walked past her, and Natale could already feel the anger radiating off of him. She did not know him as well as she should, not yet, but she wasn’t an idiot. She knew when someone was repressing rage.

  She followed him out into the grounds. Louisa, she could sense, was a bit behind them, giving them space while still technically being there as Natalie’s escort.

  “You’re displeased with me,” Natalie said. Honesty, she thought, was probably the best option in this situation.

  “How could I not be?” Lord Ridgecleff replied. He looked around as if to make sure that no one else was about.

  Natalie looked around as well. The grounds were lovely. Flower beds here, a hedge maze there. But none of it was something she cared to pay attention to right now. It might as well be a howling heath for all that it mattered.

  “Your behavior last night was deplorable,” Lord Ridgecleff said. “I am not—I do not wish to be the sort of man who scolds his wife like a child. But when you insist on behaving as you did—”

  “And what, pray tell, was wrong with my behavior?” Natalie replied, feeling anger bubble up inside of her. She had never taken kindly to being chastised, especially when she did not feel there was anything she ought to be chastised for.

  “Where shall I even begin?” Lord Ridgecleff said.

  “First, there is the way that you treated Mrs. Hapson. I know that she talks to no end but she is a lonely and sweet-tempered woman. It costs you nothing to feign an interest in her conversation. In time you might even grow to genuinely appreciate it.”

  “Appreciate what that woman had to say? She was most improper. You are telling me to watch how I behave and yet you ignore how she nattered on about subjects that were quite personal—”

  “She is a lonely older lady. Someday you will be just like her, alone with nothing to amuse you or pass the time except for the comings and goings of those younger than yourself. You might want to have some compassion for her if only for the sake of someone having compassion for you when you are her age.”

  Lord Ridgecleff was impressive when he was angry. Commanding, he seemed to tower over her. Natalie squared her shoulders. She was not to be intimidated by him.

  And yet… what he said rang uncomfortably true. She did not like to think on it, the idea of her growing old and irrelevant. But then, who did? It was a fact of life.

  Someday she, too, would be like Mrs. Hapson. Her husband might still be around or he might be gone. But in either case she would have nothing to entertain her except for the business of her neighbors.

  And Mrs. Hapson hadn’t been mean-spirited like some older ladies that Natalie knew. Older women, she had found, could be awful gossips who liked nothing better than to spread rumors about those around them.

  “You judged her too harshly,” Lord Ridgecleff went on. “I am sure that in London or in your own home you are able to avoid the older ladies and only speak to ladies of your own age.

  “But you cannot avoid them forever. Out here you will have to speak with everyone who lives about. You must be a gracious hostess for Mountbank.

  “You lose nothing by being kind. You could lose everything by being dismissive. Your duty as the mistress of this place and as my wife compels you to treat all with respect. I will not have it any other way.

  “As for Mr. Cleary…”

  “Surely you cannot have anything to say against him,” Natalie said. “He was a most charming and educated gentleman. And, I understand it, with a good income and capital.”

  “He possesses all of those things, as you have said. But I will not have you playing with my sister’s heart.”

  “Miss Ridgecleff could hardly be unhappy with such a match—”

  “Her affections are already bestowed upon another,” Lord Ridgecleff said. “Which you would know had you taken the time to get to know her and win her confidence before blundering about trying to sell her off like cattle.”

  “Is that not what you did?” Natalie shot back. Her temper was rising, as was her shame. “You were quick enough to snap me up without a care for your heart or mine.”

  “That is different. Our circumstances forced us together.”

  “You cannot blame me for wishing a good match upon your sister.”

  “Do not pretend that you did this for my sister. You did it for yourself, for your own amusement. Your behavior is nothing but selfish, Miss Natalie. How are you supposed to please anyone, least of all yourself, when you think of nothing but what will amuse you and only you?”

  “And are you not just as selfish?” Natalie asked. “You who ran off to the Continent and abandoned your family because of a simple series of quarrels? Who waited until the last moment to wed and so now must bind yourself and a lady together when it’s obvious that we can hardly stand one another?”

  Lord Ridgecleff looked surprised, as though he was not used to being called out in such a fashion. Perhaps he wasn’t. But he must get used to it, for Natalie would never simply allow him to run roughshod over her.

  “Do you then deny you did anything wrong?” Lord Ridgecleff asked when he had sufficiently recovered.

  “I do not,” Natalie admitted. For perhaps—yes, indeed, she had been acting selfishly. Thinking only of what she wanted and what would amuse her. “I acted out of turn.”

  “And dangerously so. Mr. Cleary…” Lord Ridgecleff sighed. He honestly looked concerned for her. “I have all but grown up with him and he has his charms. But he has his faults as well. Grave ones.

  “Your speaking with him last night did not arouse in him an affection for my sister. It rather aroused an affection for you.”

  “For me?” Natalie could hardly believe her ears. “But I am engaged to you. Surely he cannot—”

  “He can, and will, and has.” Lord Ridgecleff moved his hand, as though to reach out for her, but then arrested the movement. His voice gentled. “I know that you did not mean anything untoward.”

  “My matchmaking might be seen as untoward.”

  “It was selfish. That I do not contest. But it was not…” Lord Ridgecleff sighed. “Many women, and men, matchmake. It is understandable. I know that you did not mean to seem improper, is what I aim to say. You did not wish to give him the impression that you did.”

  “That I am an improper lady?” Natalie asked. She felt quite sick, her stomach all but heaving. “That I would—that I am so base—I am engaged to you. I know that we have our quarrels, clearly. We hardly know one another. But I would never break off from you. I would never try to disgrace you like that.”

  “I know,” Lord Ridgecleff said. His voice was so gentle and reassuring. Completely unlike how he had been a moment ago.

  “If you spoke to me in such a gentle manner all the time you might receive more affection from me,” Natalie could not help but say.

  “And if you thought more of your position at Mountbank you might receive more affection from me,” Lord Ridgecleff replied, a trace of his frustration returning. “You have a duty—”

  “I understand that I have a duty,” Natalie replied. Her eyes stung, and she blinked rapidly to dispel any tears. She would not cry in front of him. She would not.

  “Is this all because of my position as your wife? Or do you care nothing for who I am as a person? If you did not like who I am, then you should have chosen someone else.

  “Chastise me as you like. Perhaps I deserve it. In fact, as I stand here I am certain that I do deserve it. But do not chastise me like I am a dog who has disobeyed you. You should at least try to care about me for my own sake because I am a person that you care for.

  “I would take all of this with a better grace if I only knew that you were saying it because you cared for my wellbeing.”

&nbs
p; Lord Ridgecleff, to his credit, looked suitably chastened. For a moment or two they walked in silence.

  Natalie could not guess as to how he was feeling. He looked quite thunderstruck by the entire thing. She herself felt nothing but shame.

  She had been rude to a kind woman, put another girl’s heart on the line for her own amusement, and what was worst, had nearly encouraged a man to help ruin her.

  How could she have been so foolish, so awful? This was what Bridget and Louisa had been warning her about.

  This was why she needed to hold her tongue. This was why she needed to think more before she acted.

  “You make a good point,” Lord Ridgecleff said at last. “I have thought only of saving myself in this. I have not truly thought about what you might need.

  “I should be a more attentive husband to you. And I shall do that, from now on. I know that this is not the life you prefer. But perhaps…if we might go on walks or riding or such, we might at least come to understand one another’s character better.”

  Natalie nodded. She felt like bursting, although whether in tears or anger she did not know.

  “I will strive to do better as well,” she said, her voice a whisper. She dared not raise her tone higher for fear her voice would break and betray her emotions. “I have acted out of turn.

  “I feel the fool. My sisters are all engaged to be married for love except for me. How I used to laugh at them and their ways. Now I am the one marrying out of necessity and the shame of my husband.”

  Lord Ridgecleff stopped walking. “You are not my shame,” he said, his voice firm but not unkind. “You are—the moment I saw you—” he shook his head. “You are a clever and witty girl. Do not put yourself down that way.

  “You have your faults but then, so do we all. It seems that I have my own faults I should have been examining more closely.

  “Perhaps it is that your quieter sisters—Miss Louisa and Miss Regina, is that right?”