I hurried down the steps. This was the same building I’d climbed what felt like years before.
Finding activity, I raised my hands to the men in black who had appeared.
“Can you take me to Lady Hel, please?” I asked.
Instead of Lady Hel, Harley materialized. “Sif,” he said and gave me a hug. “I am so sorry for this.”
“You need not apologize. This is all my fault.” I moved from his embrace and steeled myself against what was to come.
“Come. Everything will be fine. I trust that you are returning the orb?”
I nodded. I didn’t trust my voice.
The way to where Lady Hel waited was a labyrinth, and before she heard us coming, I saw her regret and understood. To her, this was all collateral damage.
“We have company,” Verdandi said and swung around in her chair. I’d known her as a friend, but now she didn’t appear as such.
“Sif,” Lady Hel said, “did the gods send you?”
I shook my head. “I’ve come of my own free will to return to you that which I took.”
“I’m not the villain here,” Hel said. “You are one of the faithful, and the ways of the gods you just don’t understand.”
How was it possible? I’d never expected Hel to be so rational.
“What do you plan to do?” I asked.
“I will restore the city and free my brother.” She reached out and grabbed my hands in her own. “I am not the monster they’ve taught you I am. I only wish to free my family from this yoke, and this is the beginning of that.”
“You will free who now?” I asked.
Mythology taught that all of her family was bat-shit crazy, but if it’d lied about her, maybe it’d lied about them, too.
“I need you, and then we can begin the ritual which will unlock my brother’s door. Your blood will combine with the orb, serving as a sacrifice, but you will not die. It is only part of the ritual. Because you are the key, both symbolically and also physically, both the orb and your blood are required.”
“Whoa, I don’t know about all of that. I mean—”
“I will not let any harm come to you,” Harley said and placed his hand on my shoulder.
“Come,” Hel glanced toward the sky, “we must begin.”
They led me to a back room that reminded me of what it must be like to go to a spa and have a great massage. The room was decorated with calming pastel colors, candles flickered, and a soothing chant drifted on the air.
“I’d hoped you come,” Harley said. It was his friendship that placed me at ease and I tried not to think of being led to the gallows, of pending doom and gloom, or even just death.
He pulled back the curtain and behind it was a large open terrace, and there in its middle, an altar with runes carved into it.
The rain had ceased. Instead, the sky appeared peaceful.
Verdandi approached. “Sif, listen carefully. I wish to bless you with one piece of knowledge.”
“What?” I asked.
“The only reason you have been able to enjoy this life is because Lady Hel has helped you.”
“My faith is my choice,” I said.
“Yes, but know that just as faith is a choice, it is also a weapon, and one day you might be called to choose sides.”
“Enough of that, Verdandi.” Hel shooed her away. “She loves speaking in riddles, but that is what the Norns have always done. Now, where were we? This will be a rebirth, Sif. Your masquerade will cease and you will walk as all that you are. It will be as if you are flying from the dark cave, no longer afraid but free. We will all be free.”
“Will this hurt?”
“It is like birth from the womb. You will be compressed and mis-shaped, but when you emerge and take your first breath, all the shackles that surround you now will no longer bind you.” She took my hands in hers. “And these wounds that have healed on the outside will finally heal within. Place the orb on the pedestal, please.”
I followed her directions, conceding that this—my being tied down to a sacred stone, and the raising of the knife to my skin—would end the plight of us all.
A bright light grew and the building shook, and lightning sizzled across the sky.
“Let me up, let me up,” I said. Panic filled me, and I struggled against my bindings.
Thor appeared, and in slow motion, I watched him move toward Hel with his hammer in his hand. Harley must have seen the same thing, for he jumped before Hel to protect her from the hammer’s blow.
“No,” I screamed.
But Thor struck and Harley crumbled to the floor.
The wail that escaped Hel’s lips tore at me.
She dropped her blade. The metal clanged against the floor. She fell to her knees and pulled Harley onto her lap and cradled him to her, and all I could do was watch.
My body violently shook remembering my dear friend. My eyes began to well, blurring my vision.
But nothing blocked out Hel’s pain.
She rocked back and forth, cocooning him.
“No, no,” she cried. “Don’t leave me again!” Her shoulders slumped and for a brief moment the world stopped. It was just them. “Don’t leave me.”
All her plans seemed to have come to nothing. One moment his smiling face was there, and the next his light was simply gone.
Her pain was as real as gravity.
His light was gone. His brilliance snuffed away. And it was my fault.
I don’t know how long I stood there watching them.
There was no way Harley could have survived such blunt force. I should have stayed in Asgard and none of this would have happened.
Thor gripped my arm and pulled me back against him. “We must leave now.”
“I’m so sorry, Lady Hel,” I rambled.
“Sorry? What a word to use at a time like this. Will your apology resurrect him?”
She turned to face Thor. “What have you done?” Her body began to shift and change, until purple smoke formed around her, and the glamour she’d been wearing shifted away.
The stars that had previously twinkled disappeared under another wave of thick dark clouds.
She barely raised her index finger and the lights again began to flicker, and the darkness grew thicker. My breathing quickened.
“Have you forgotten that a piece of you remains with me? You betrayed me, us.” She whispered it, and tears I’d barely been holding back fell.
“For betrayal, there are repercussions.”
I knew what she meant. The gates of Hel were always open.
I yanked away and shook my head. The room began to spin around and I closed my eyes. She forced the memory on me: the feel of the sharp razor blade against my skin; the warm water around me; the sob that barely left. I was stuck in it, muddled in the panic that sought to claw its way out of me. I couldn’t escape it.
“You’re worthless,” she whispered. “You don’t deserve this gift Harley wished for you to have.”
“Stop it, Hel,” Thor ordered.
“But I am just getting started.” She blew a blast of air, and the once rushing water quickly turned into blocks of ice, as thick and cold as found in the extreme Norselands. “Helheim is not made of fire but of bone-crushing ice.”
She clapped her hands and the thick cloud of blue wafted and dispersed.
“Do you really wish to go to war with me?” Thor threatened. He puffed out his chest.
“No, I don’t want war. I want your death. I want you to feel the depth of this betrayal. It is just like you all to not want any of us monsters to be happy,” Lady Hel sneered.
I fell to my knees. Jagged pieces within me didn’t fit together. My shoulders bowed under the weight of the war within my mind.
“Are you going to cry about it now? Will that make it all better? I’m the one who saved you, and instead you rally against me.”
I raised my palms skyward. My heart hiccupped. My skin felt foreign. The pain too real again. Drowning in my own tears, I couldn�
�t breathe, feel, live. Gods were supposed to help, not damn.
My body began to shake as everything began to crumble.
Hel palmed the orb, which glowed. She pushed her hand into my torso, and I felt the cold hand of a December death grip freezing me from inside. Fear lapped at me, closing in around my mind. No words escaped my sealed lips, as if glue had rolled across them like a new shade of lipstick. I fought to breathe, to stay coherent.
“Where is your heart? Your compassion?” Thor asked.
“You just killed him,” she whispered. It was louder and fiercer than anything she’d said until this point. “Now, Thor, let me show you how real gods decimate.”
With her batons of glowing purple and blue, she approached Thor and they squared off. The hammer was primed against her batons. With realization and something akin to determination etched onto her face, she began to transform. Her shoulders widened, and more purple and blue batons appeared in her hands.
With each swing of Thor’s Hammer, she matched it blow for blow. His super-strength was well matched by her deadly blows.
“Only light can defeat darkness,” Thor said, and lightning sizzled down from the sky, lighting up Mjölnir, and with one last swing, he struck.
Chapter 30
Sif, Richmond
“Enough,” I screamed and raised the orb, which was mixed with my blood, high above my head. But instead of the clouds parting and the Midgard Serpent rising, a flash of light sparked and Brynhildr appeared. Standing behind her were Ola, Kristen, Emili, and Chi. Her sword was ready to assist Thor.
“Hel, it is time that you concede,” Thor said. “For what you have done and are doing makes you appear like a spoiled child; a child who needs to be punished.”
“She’s just grieving,” I said. “Please, this is all just one big misunderstanding.” I watched Brynhildr’s every movement. For some reason, I didn’t trust her to not jump into the fight and attempt to square off with one lone woman, Hel, who grieved the loss of her love.
“This was all a trick!” Hel cast her scathing gaze on me. I shook my head.
She’d never had the power to free Jörmungandr, and since my return from Asgard, I hadn’t had the power to help her, either.
She pushed Thor away. The kindness that had once rested in his eyes quickly disappeared.
Freyja knew that I’d take the orb and had switched it out. I don’t know what made me rip away from Thor’s grasp and shove him out of the way. Hel had lost everything, but she would not lose me.
Harley had been my friend, and I would not let his memory die because of this injustice.
Love had power to make us do the damnedest things.
“I will not remain silent or leave your side, my lady Hel. My faith, and Harley’s friendship, compel me to act.”
“Today we shall perish,” she whispered.
“What are you doing, Sif?” Chi called out to me. “Come, leave her side. You don’t know what you are doing. We won’t hurt you, we want to save you from her. Look what she’s already done.”
I shook my head. “There are no good guys here. Only pain and punishment. The absence of good does not make her evil, and your compass is broken.” My heart flip-flopped between an overwhelming anger and an all-consuming sadness. I turned my back on them. “What is the plan?”
“The plan, my child, is for you to drop your weapons,” Loki called out. “I do not wish for anything to happen to you that hasn’t already happened.”
Brynhildr moved my friends farther back away from the action. “Stay inside until I call and tell you it is safe,” I heard her say. They obeyed and left the terrace.
“But they must pay for what they have done to us. How long shall we be bound, beaten, and bruised as they declare us a nuisance?” Lady Hel asked.
“But you are proving to them that you should not be trusted,” Loki said.
“I have walked the earth as I was cursed to do, heartbroken, and now they have taken it back. What Thor did was personal. My love’s blood still drips from his hammer and he makes no claims of sorrow. Instead, he acts as though it was a necessary evil.”
“This will not change your heart if you don’t let it,” Loki said and closed the gap between them. “You are not weak, but strong.” He placed a rune stone in her hand. “You have got your key back and can return home.”
“If you put down your weapons and leave this nonsense, you can then return to Helheim,” Loki said.
“Is that what Odin has declared?” Lady Hel asked. She nodded as if considering it, and it looked as though she was about to agree.
“Dear Thor, let us toss down our weapons,” Lady Hel said and approached him. “Let us shake on it.”
“You really mean to leave this behind? No more havoc?” Thor asked.
Lady Hel nodded and Thor took her outstretched hand.
I saw a small fiery blade in her other hand only shortly before she struck him. “I will only return to Helheim with an honored guest.”
Just as quickly as it began, Thor disappeared with Lady Hel.
“Oh, this will not be good,” Brynhildr said. “What did you say to her, you traitor,” she screamed at Loki.
“I did only as I was told, and tried to talk her down from causing war.”
“You pushed her to do more,” Brynhildr snapped.
“She is only after what she thinks is hers, and mine, all of ours—freedom,” Loki remarked in an even tone.
“Freedom is not a commodity. No one is free! It is illogical to think that we all don’t serve something. Odin will be pissed.”
“No, he will be more than pissed, and I think he will also declare that you are at fault.”
Brynhildr looked dismayed. “Me? I’ve done nothing but try to help.”
“But since when is the All-Father logical?” Loki asked.
“This is your doing!”
“How so? I did not ask to come here. I did nothing but hide deep in the forest in a pond, but even by hiding there, it wasn’t far enough, right?”
“Dear Sif, what will you do now that you have allied yourself to the Queen of Helheim?” Brynhildr asked.
I hadn’t meant for Thor to fall victim to her anger and rage. “Will she hurt him?”
“She will use him as a bargaining tool, but you must also remember, time here in Midgard is different from that in Asgard. Time here can be rewound, unspun, undone. This is only one timeline, so what will the next one be?” Loki said. He stretched out his arms, and I walked into them. He wrapped his arms around me and missed his comforting warmth when the hug ended.
“And what about you?” I asked.
“I think I’ll disappear for a little bit,” Loki said. “The gods will respond soon enough, and it’s better if I am nowhere around. I tend to get blamed for everything that happens to them, even if I’ve done nothing but try to help.”
Chapter 31
Sif
I could barely hold it together. I rocked back and forth, and my legs failed to hold me up. I’d been trying to be strong for so long—had never asked for help, kept my nose to the grindstone, and that had gotten me in all of this trouble.
Harley’s body still lay there, and Hel was no longer able to cradle him to her. Thor was gone to only Hel knew where, while Loki gave a casual wave goodbye, and I was left there standing among the shards that remained of this horrible situation. Everything that happened was my fault.
I’d wanted to be Wonder Woman, make a difference, but instead I found my mortality. I couldn’t catch the light and hold it to my chest. I’d pined so much for Asgard that I’d taken Midgard for granted.
None of this was fair.
“Why are you crying about him?” Brynhildr said. “He was with her, an enemy to the gods.”
“The gods created this mess. Harley was kindness; he was quiet and my friend,” I said. “He helped me.”
“The gods help those who help themselves, Sif. Maybe instead of waiting for them to assist you in this life, you should have b
een trying to find a way to help yourself.”
“Sif, are you okay?” I heard Emili call out.
“Look away Emili, don’t—”
She stumbled out on to the terrace and crumbled next to me. Her sobs were just like those of Hel, like my own.
“This is all on you, Sif,” she said and pushed me. I wanted her to hit me, to wail on my shoulder.
Ola, Kristen, and Chi came and wrapped their arms around Emili and stared at Harley’s broken body.
My hands were just as guilty as Thor’s. I’d brought him here. “I’m sorry, so sorry,” I mumbled.
“That’s not going to change things,” Chi said, “What you’ve done can’t be made right by some half-ass apology. What do you think we can do with that? Not only did you up and leave us during a cataclysmic event to go have your day in Asgard, I guess, but then you continued the bad behavior. I don’t know this Sif, and I don’t think I ever did know you.”
“I can make this right!”
“There is no way to make this right. I hope you had fun, and that it was all worth it. It’s time for you to get your life together, and don’t expect us to be there in the wings to help you with it.”
“This is goodbye?” I asked.
“Bless your heart, Sif,” Emili said. “No, it’s not goodbye—it’s good riddance.” They turned and walked back into the building’s interior, leaving me alone.
If I looked over the building’s edge, I’d still see the chaos left behind, still hear the pleas for help, feel the hopelessness.
“Your destiny has not yet ended, but is just beginning, Sif,” Verdandi said. She sat to the side and whittled on a piece of wood. It was reddish brown, like me.
Now understanding that she was one of the Norn sisters, I understood the wood. “Is that my life you are carving?”
“That is not for you to know. You have been the catalyst for the beginning, but it is just that, a beginning, and your dear friends will need you.”
“You heard what they were saying. They don’t want to deal with me.”
Hellbent Page 11