Witch Me Luck (Wicked Witches of the Midwest Book 6)

by Amanda M. Lee

  “At the rate you were going, it would’ve been Christmas before you got it out,” Chief Terry replied. “I was just helping you along.”

  That’s not how it felt. I risked a glance at Landon. “Are you going to yell at me?”

  “Do you want me to yell at you?”

  “Not particularly.”

  “Then I’m not going to yell at you,” Landon said.

  There had to be a catch. He was never this easygoing when I was involved in trouble. “Why?”

  “Because I think you already know that what you did was stupid,” Landon said. “Yelling at you isn’t going to make that any clearer. So, I’m not going to yell.”

  “See, you say you’re not going to yell, but you look like you really want to yell,” I said. “You have that pinched look you get right before you go after Aunt Tillie’s wine.”

  “I don’t have a pinched look,” Landon shot back.

  I pointed at his forehead. “You really do.”

  “Don’t push me right now, Bay. I’m trying really hard to control my temper. If you push me, I’m going to lose it, and we’re both going to regret it.”

  I lowered my finger. “I’m sorry.”

  “Oh, how can you stay mad at her when she makes that face?” Chief Terry asked, grabbing my chin and tipping my head up. “She looks so cute and miserable. She’s like a puppy.”

  Landon rolled his eyes. “That must be why I want to swat her with a rolled-up newspaper.”

  “Just let it go,” Chief Terry said. “She’s got enough problems.”

  “What problems?” Landon asked, curious.

  “Criminy, and here comes one of them now,” Chief Terry said, turning swiftly. “I do not want to talk to that viper, so … I’m going to question some more people who were in the bank. Whatever she wants, it’s up to you to deal with her.”

  Landon shifted his head to study the woman heading in our direction. “Who is that?”

  “The worst person ever,” I grumbled.

  “Do you want to be more specific?”

  “Um, excuse me, are you a police officer?” Lila asked, sidling up to Landon with a pretty smile.

  “I’m with the FBI,” Landon said.

  If Lila was posturing before, she positively preened now. A police officer might be fun to flirt with, but a handsome FBI agent was a catch. “Wow,” Lila said, her voice breathy. “That’s impressive. Do you have an office around here?”

  I made a sound in the back of my throat, something akin to a growl, and then forced my attention from Lila. If I looked at her for too long, I was going to claw her eyes out. I knew exactly what she was doing, and I already didn’t like it.

  “I work out of the office in Traverse City,” Landon said. “Do you need help with something?”

  “Well, one of the other police officers said I had to stay close because I was a witness to the terrible tragedy that occurred here earlier today,” Lila said. “I was just wondering how long I would have to stay.”

  “I’m not sure yet,” Landon said. “I’ll get a uniform to take your statement as soon as possible.”

  “I’d much rather give you my … statement,” Lila said, touching his wrist lightly. “You’re a professional, after all.”

  “Every law enforcement official present here today is a professional,” Landon said. “I’m sure I can get someone to take your statement in the next few minutes. Then you can be on your way, ma’am.”

  “Oh, call me Lila. Ma’am makes me turn around and look for my mother.”

  “Sure. Lila.” Landon turned back to me. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “I’m fine.”

  “We’re going to talk about this later,” he said. “I mean talk, not yell.”

  “I can’t wait.”

  “You can talk to me later,” Lila offered helpfully. “I’m staying at the Dragonfly Inn.”

  Well, that was just a punch in the gut. The Dragonfly was the inn my father and uncles opened a few weeks before. That meant, if I wanted to see my father this week I was going to have to risk seeing Lila, too. “What?”

  “No one is talking to you, Bay,” Lila said. “Just sit there and look … however it is you usually look.”

  Landon shifted his gaze between Lila and me, confused. “Is something going on here?”

  “She’s the Devil,” I said.

  “Oh, don’t listen to her,” Lila said, rubbing her hand along Landon’s forearm. I wanted to rip her arm off and beat her to death with it. “She’s always been jealous of me. It goes back to high school.”

  Landon’s face was unreadable. “I see.”

  “I was popular,” Lila continued. “Bay was … well … Bay was special. She had imaginary friends.”

  Understanding washed across Landon’s face. He was well aware of my witchy abilities, and he was also aware of the trouble I’d had in school thanks to them. “Well, I guess it’s good for her that I happen to like people with imaginary friends.” He shot me a small wink, immediately making me feel better.

  Lila shifted. “What?”

  “I had an imaginary friend growing up, too,” Landon said. “His name was Gordon, and he was a magic goat.”

  I knew he was making it up, but the idea was so surreal I couldn’t help but smile.

  “Well, Bay’s imaginary friend hung around until she was in high school,” Lila said. “She was a total loser.”

  “My imaginary friend still hangs around,” Landon said. “Am I a loser, too?”

  “Of course not,” Lila said. “You’re too cute to be a loser.”

  Landon kept his face placid, but I could tell Lila’s machinations were starting to wear on him. “Ma’am, if you just have a seat over there I’ll have a uniform come and get your statement in a few minutes.”

  “Why are you taking her statement and not mine?” Lila asked, her lower lip jutting out. “She’s a nobody.”

  “First, I’m not taking her statement,” Landon said. “It’s already been taken. Second, I’m not taking any statements. I’m here to help the police with their investigation. I’m not in charge.”

  “I’d still rather give my statement to you,” Lila said. “Perhaps we could do it over dinner? I was on the sidewalk when the bank robber ran out of the building. I could have pertinent information for your investigation.”

  “You dropped to the ground and covered your face,” I said. “You didn’t see anything. You were too busy whimpering like a little … .”

  “You should have dropped to the ground and covered your face,” Landon snapped.

  Lila shot me a triumphant look. “So, how about that dinner?”

  “I already have plans for dinner,” Landon said.

  “Oh, now, come on,” Lila prodded. “I’m sure dinner with me will be much more stimulating than whatever else you’ve got planned.”

  “I seriously doubt that,” Landon said, refusing to play Lila’s game. He extended his hand to me. “Come on, Bay. I’m starving, and you and I need to have a talk.”

  I sheepishly placed my uninjured hand in his and let him tug me to my feet. “We’re just going to talk, right? You said there won’t be any yelling, and I’m holding you to that.”

  “Please, we’re having dinner with your family,” Landon said. “There’s going to be yelling. I just plan on holding off until I see Aunt Tillie.”

  “She hasn’t done anything to you yet,” I protested.

  “She will,” Landon said.

  “How do you know that?”

  “Because she always does.” Landon turned back to the paramedic. “There’s nothing wrong with her hand other than the obvious, right?”

  The paramedic shook his head. “Her wrist might be a little sore because she landed on it, but it’s not broken and she didn’t sprain it. She should be fine.”

  “Good,” Landon said, slipping his arm around my waist. “I have plans for her tonight, and she can’t be hobbled.”

  Lila’s face was a mask of anger and resent
ment as she glared at us. “What is going on here?”

  “I’m sure someone will take your statement directly,” Landon said. “Bay is done here, though. We’re going to dinner at the inn, and then we’re going to bed early because I haven’t seen her in three days and I’ve missed her. I have no idea what you’re doing.”

  Landon linked his fingers with mine and dragged me from the bank steps. I could feel Lila’s eyes on my back as we walked down the sidewalk. Once we were out of her earshot, I couldn’t contain myself. “I know you’re mad at me, but that was the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”

  Landon shook his head, annoyed. “I don’t like her.”

  “Join the club.”

  “I’m still angry with you.”

  “I know,” I said, sighing.

  Landon leaned over and gave me a quick kiss. “I wouldn’t worry about me being angry,” he said. “It probably won’t last very long.”

  “Just until you see Aunt Tillie,” I said.

  He smirked. “Just until we’re alone and you’re naked. I really did miss you.”

  I was a member of that club too.

  Five

  “I have to ask, did you recognize the guy who ran into you outside of the bank?”

  Landon was mostly quiet, contemplative, during the drive to The Overlook. He didn’t appear angry, but he wasn’t overly friendly either.

  I shook my head. “It happened really fast.”

  “When you heard the gunshots, what did you think they were?” Landon’s gaze was focused on the winding driveway, but there was an edge to his voice.

  “I didn’t really have time to process it,” I said. “In my head, I think I knew what it was. I just … nothing like that has ever happened here before. Well, Mel Dixon once tried to rob the bank, but he did it with a water pistol filled with scented doe urine. I just … I didn’t think.”

  Landon’s jaw clenched as he parked. “That’s what I figured.” He killed the engine, exhaled heavily, and then turned to me. “I don’t want to fight.”

  “We’re going to, though, aren’t we?”

  “No. It’s just … every time I think you’re starting to get it and think things out, you do something like this.”

  “I didn’t mean … .”

  “You never mean to do it,” Landon said. “Your intentions are always good. Well, they’re always good in situations like this. Sometimes I wonder what you’re thinking when you’re dealing with your family, but that’s a whole other issue – and one that’s entertaining, so I let it go. This is important, though.

  “You need to think before you do stuff like this,” he continued. “You need to think about what would happen to the people who would still be here if you died. You need to think about me occasionally.”

  I faltered, surprised by his admission. “I … .”

  “Just think about it, Bay,” Landon said, pushing the door of the Explorer open and hopping out. “You have a lot of people who would miss you.”

  I sat in the Explorer a full minute after the door shut. When I finally regained my faculties and glanced through the windshield, I found Landon waiting for me. Once I joined him in front of the Explorer, I searched for the words to somehow make this better. “I really am sorry.”

  “I know you are,” Landon said, grabbing my hand. “Just … think. That’s all I ask. Now, come on. If this parking lot is any indication, we’re going to be dealing with a full house tonight, and that means Aunt Tillie is going to put on a show.”

  “Are you sure you want to deal with this?” I asked. “We could go back to the guesthouse and order a pizza or something.”

  “Pizza? Your mother is one of the best cooks in the state. I don’t want pizza.”

  “Okay,” I said. “Just … we’re okay, right?”

  Landon leaned over and gave me a soft kiss. “We’re fine. I’m sure I’ll have nightmares about you being killed by a bank robber tonight, but you’ll just have to distract me when I wake up in a cold sweat.”

  “How do you want me to distract you?”

  “I find that nudity and bacon are always good ways to start.”

  I pursed my lips, fighting the urge to laugh, but finally giving in. “I’ll give it some thought.”

  “Thought? Woman, you should know you’re getting bacon-scented perfume for Christmas this year.”

  “Oh, well, that sounds … nice.”

  Landon grinned. “Don’t worry. I’ll get you an outfit to match.”

  “OH, GOOD, you’re here.”

  My mother was aflutter behind the big desk in the lobby of The Overlook. Her face was flushed with excitement, but she also looked overwhelmed. When my mother and aunts opted to renovate the old family homestead and turn it into a bed and breakfast, I’d initially doubted they could pull it off. While they were all master cooks, and fussy enough to keep the inn clean, they weren’t exactly known for their organizational skills.

  To my surprise, they pulled it off, and The Overlook was the most successful inn in the area. That didn’t mean my mother and aunts lacked the propensity to freak out when the mood struck. My mother appeared to be in the mood.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “We’re completely booked,” Mom said.

  “I thought that was a good thing.”

  “It is. We’ve just got a lot going on. It’s good you’re here. Someone needs to … rein in your aunt.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Which one?”

  “Which one do you think?”

  Aunt Tillie. Crap. “What did she do now?”

  “She’s just being … a pain in the-you-know-what.”

  “Ass?” Landon asked, raising an eyebrow.

  “Don’t be a smart mouth,” Mom warned. “I can only take so much this week. We have a lot going on, and you adding your special blend of sarcasm to the mix won’t help.”

  “Where is Aunt Tillie?” I asked, patting Landon’s arm. He seemed surprised by my mother’s admonishment. She usually doted on him, thinking he was her only chance of marrying me off. He wasn’t used to being on the end of her ire stick.

  “She’s in the kitchen,” Mom said. “She’s overseeing dinner preparations.”

  Since Aunt Tillie hadn’t bothered to cook anything that wasn’t related to her wine business since the first President Bush was in office, I knew that had to be a special torture for my aunts. “I’ll go and … distract her.”

  “Good,” Mom said. “Since Annie and Belinda are out of town until next week, your aunt seems bored.”

  Belinda and Annie Martin were a recent addition to our small family. Eight-year-old Annie stumbled upon Thistle and Aunt Tillie after a car accident, and after a close brush with death – and Annie’s father – Belinda recovered from the injuries she sustained in the accident. She worked at The Overlook full time now, but she still had some belongings to claim from Minnesota, and that’s where the duo had traveled for the week. It was a bad time to go, but Belinda’s former landlord was threatening to throw everything out, so they had little choice.

  “Aunt Tillie’s really taken a shine to Annie,” I said.

  “It’s funny, she never liked you, Clove and Thistle when you were kids, but she absolutely adores Annie.”

  “Maybe she’s mellowing,” Landon suggested.

  “Oh, you’re cute,” Mom said, patting his cheek. “She’ll never mellow.”

  “She won’t,” I agreed. “Evil only gets stronger with age.”

  Landon rolled his eyes. “Come on, Trouble. Let’s see what your aunt is up to now. I hate to say it, but I’ve missed her a little these past few days.”

  Mom furrowed her brow. “That’s not funny.”

  “It wasn’t a joke.”

  Mom blinked rapidly, surprise at his admission rolling off of her. “Well, that’s just … .”

  “Don’t worry,” I said, grabbing Landon’s hand and tugging him into the inner sanctum of the bed and breakfast. “It won’t last long. He’s feeling all fuzzy and
nostalgic now, but five minutes with Aunt Tillie will cure him of that.”

  “Oh, I kind of like him when he’s a softy.”

  “I’m never a softy,” Landon challenged. “I’m hard.”

  I shot him a dubious look. “Do you want to rephrase that?”

  Landon realized what he said, but it wasn’t in his nature to back down. “No.” He lowered his voice. “I’ll show you how hard of a man I am later.”

  “I heard that,” Mom called to our retreating backs. “You’re a disgusting man.”

  “That’s what you get for eavesdropping.”

  We found Marnie and Twila buzzing about the kitchen a few minutes later, and instead of resting in her recliner in the corner Aunt Tillie perched on a stool, watching them work. A few months before, we’d removed her old recliner because it smelled – and there was a possibility an errant scorpion was living in it – and she’d been a bear until we bought her a new one. The fact that she was ignoring the chair now was significant – and worrisome.

  “What’s going on?” I asked.

  “We’re cooking a big dinner,” Twila said, her hands busy ornately icing a cake.

  “We’re offering three big desserts because it’s the first night everyone is here,” Marnie added, placing a pie on a trivet to cool.

  “I’m supervising,” Aunt Tillie said, nonplussed.

  “I heard.”

  I’ve always thought Aunt Tillie resembles a hobbit. She’s short, not quite five feet tall, and her face is round. The look she flashed me now gave her an evil quality that was more “deranged Sith lord” than “Shire-loving hobbit.”

  “What did your mother say about me?” she growled, more than asked.

  “She said you were supervising,” I said.

  “Oh, you’re such a bad liar,” Aunt Tillie said. “I know she said something about me. What was it?”

  “She didn’t say anything about you,” I protested.

  “She said you were enthusiastic,” Landon said, studying Marnie’s pie. “What is this? It smells good.”

  “Blackberry.”

  “Well, I know what I’m having,” Landon said.

  “You have to eat your dinner first,” Twila said. “You can’t have dessert until you eat dinner.”