by Kim Miller
Between the saplings and the wet rock-face and the boggy mud at the bottom it sure made us concentrate. I suppose that’s why we finished that first day so worn out. And being worn out can make some people vulnerable, like what happened to Hamish.
We got a fire going and put the billy on and started to change our wet socks. Everyone was talking about the buzz of the abseiling and Hamish made this funny grunting noise that stopped us straight up. We looked around and he’s gone all white and staring into the ground. Actually, staring at his foot. His sock is bright red. A whole lot of it. And the blood is starting to flow up over his boot which he’s got half undone.
We all sat there staring and Mr Sykes said, ‘Let’s look at what you’ve got there.’ Hamish was starting to sag a bit. Mr Sykes slowly pulled off the boot. The sock was red with blood from top to toe. Mr Sykes tipped that boot up and more blood just ran from it. There must have been half a coke can of blood in there. Hamish started to fall forward and we had to hold him up. ‘Get him a cup of tea, somebody,’ said Mr Sykes. ‘Hamish, put your head down between your knees. You’ll be OK in a minute.’
Pete got him some tea and Hamish sat up again. Mr Sykes said, ‘OK, my little beauty, where are you?’ and he slowly peeled Hamish’s sock off his foot. Sitting inside that sock was the biggest leech I have ever seen. It was fat as the abseil rope and must have been sucking Hamish’s blood for half the afternoon.
‘You must have picked him up in the boggy stuff at the bottom of the cliff,’ said Mr Sykes. ‘He’s had a good feed and you’ve been bleeding into that sock for a long while. Clean your foot up and we’ll see where he got stuck into you.’ So Hamish got cleaned up and patched and Mr Sykes chucked the leech into the bushes and the rest of us were very careful about pulling our boots off I can tell you.
Hamish was still pretty white, but at least all that blood had an answer that didn’t require stitches. We stirred Hamish up a bit about nearly fainting, but he wasn’t up to it and just gave us the evil eye.
Then Mr Sykes said, ‘You know the difference between a leech and a lawyer?’ Quick as anything Jacko says, ‘A leech stops sucking you dry after you’re dead.’ We all look at him and he says, ‘My dad’s favourite joke after the divorce.’ Mostly he has this quiet smile when he does this, but this time it was a different story. So now we had two people under their own little cloud and that hot abseiling talk was fading fast.
We cooked up our tea and then it was time to get the campfire going. I had the dog food tin in my backpack, waiting for the right moment. Just enough light, just enough dark, just enough Brian. I couldn’t believe it when he took the dare, but it was another story when he realised what I was eating. So then we had three people under their own little cloud, and I was wondering what was really happening out there. Sleep didn’t come easy after all that.
The next day we were to abseil for the morning and walk back after lunch. We got to the cliff and things were different. I reckon it was partly the dog food, and partly the leech, and partly the lawyer joke.
We did normal abseiling the day before, but this time Mr Sykes said he was going to get us rap-running. Rap-running means face-forward down that cliff and we’ve done it on smaller drops. The Ridgy Didge has got lots of reasons for not rap-running, like those saplings and the water running down the rock.
We got set up and first to go was Hamish. He was off down that cliff like nobody’s business and we just watched him go for it. Jacko was belaying and he was cheering him down the cliff like crazy and trying to keep up with the belay rope. Hamish unclipped at the bottom and then Pete charged off. Nowhere near as reckless. Brian clipped on and he was out to break something, either a record or his neck. He made it quick to the bottom and Hamish and Pete were cheering him on. I set off and was madaz nervous but this was a test of dog food and I was not about to lose. And all the way they cheered me down, even Brian. Jacko had started out belaying and he went to the top and clipped on. Watching him come racing through those saplings was amazing and suddenly he was standing beside us amongst the noise.
Mr Sykes was checking our set-up at the top and we were taking turns belaying from the bottom. That rap-running was the adrenalin rush of the decade and we kept up the speed for most of the morning. We were like the SAS on secret training out there in the bush. The worst part was running back to the top coz that track up around the cliff was getting longer each time. We spent two hours rap-running that cliff and by the time we finished up we’d cheered equal to a footy final.
We packed up at lunchtime and the walk down out of the mountains was a bit quicker coz we were still so hyped up. So it proves that all you need is one boot full of blood, an old lawyer joke, and a can of dog food and you can do anything you set your mind to do. They never taught me that in my old school.
Loving it here,
Clem.
FRIDAY, JULY 3
SUDDEN DEATH
Dear Gram
I can’t believe it. The Rev’s bike has gone. The Aprilia. The 1000R. Gone. Up in smoke. We watched it. All of us. We just stood there and watched it burn away.
My mind keeps going back to the camp and the rap-running and there’s a teacher up the front going on about something and suddenly there’s all this happening.
We were in maths or English or something. Just before lunchtime. There was a noise and somebody yelling and it got pretty frantic real quick. We rushed out and could smell the fire and there in the car park was the 1000R. Burning like mad with smoke rising black and twisted.
The Rev already had the fire extinguisher and he was hot to trot with that thing, but it did no good. That bike was fibreglass and plastic and petrol and it was too late to save it. We all stood watching and then it really went up.
That petrol tank must’ve got so it couldn’t take any more coz there was a loud rush and serious flames started shooting everywhere. The bike turned itself into something very angry and everyone ran for cover.
The hissing and roaring of it was awesome. It was like it was never going to stop and we could feel the heat through our clothes from the edge of the car park. The office wall is all blistered paint, and my face will be scorched for days, I reckon.
Some of the kids were saying things like, ‘Burn, baby, burn,’ and, ‘You could do some hot laps now, Rev.’ But they got shut up by the rest of us. Even Bundy. I’ve never seen Bundy get shut up before. But this time he took it. Outnumbered.
When the fire truck arrived there was not much for them to do except hose down the wreckage. The whole school smells of smoke and the car park looks like a war zone.
That Aprilia has got me thinking some serious stuff this year and I don’t know what I’ll do without it sitting out there in the car park.
Clem.
SATURDAY, JULY 4
TWO-UPPED
Dear Gram
I was out riding and this strange thing happened. There was this noise and when I looked around there were two people following me. I didn’t recognise them but they were bigger than me and were trailing me by fifty metres.
I was fully nervous when I realised what was going on. Sometimes on weekends there are other riders in the national park, but this was just in the bush away from the race track and there are hardly ever other people in that part. I started to speed up to get away from them but they kept the same distance on my tail and I was starting to worry about whether they were trying to give me a bit of a scare or something.
Some people are like that and we get kids who come into the tracks to find someone from the school and pick a fight for no reason. That sucks but it is how some knuckle-draggers do it.
Then I thought that I could ride to where the track gets worse or even ride down the gully and shake them off. Trouble is I didn’t know if they could ride me out or not.
Then I did a really strange thing. I just stopped and let them catch up to me. I guess I figured that if they were going to do something then I probably couldn’t get away anyway. So I just stood there as the
y kept coming closer. And they both watched me and they slowed down a bit but they kept on riding past.
So I don’t know if I spooked them or what was going on. Anyway, I watched them ride on a bit and one of them turned around to look behind and I got on the bike and raced through the bush until I got closer to school.
I still haven’t got around to speaking with Dad about a new bike. Hydraulic disc brakes would be good, and lock-out shocks. And what about XTR shifters? I can’t figure out what’s hardest, asking Dad about another bike, or watching the Rev’s Aprilia burn, or those guys shadowing me today.
Your loving grandson,
Clem the Undecided.
SUNDAY, JULY 5
FOLLOWING ME IN HIS MIND
Dear Gram
Those guys following me yesterday still have me spooked. And you know what I think about whenever I see those two in my memory? I think about that teacher in primary school again.
I reckon that man used to follow me in his mind and I could feel it. He used to say, ‘Show me your muscles,’ and then he flunked me and I had to repeat that year. I didn’t even have muscles, and he followed me in his mind and did things to me that I can’t tell you about and that even Dad wouldn’t believe. Two years running he followed me in his mind.
And those two guys keep putting that teacher and his two years into my head.
Clem.
TUESDAY, JULY 7
SURVIVING BUNDY
Dear Gram
I’m a bit on the mend, but my head still hurts. I reckon I’ve got a broken head but the doctor calls it concussion. Whatever it is, I don’t like it. And my eyes don’t like it especially. And it’s all coz of that burning of the 1000R.
The coppers reckon somebody burnt it deliberately. After the fireys came the cops turned up, and guess what they found? A Trangia burner. Inside the bike somewhere. Tucked away. Somebody set that burner going. An hour later, bomb dot com.
The story about that burner has gone viral. There was a bunch of us out at the paddock talking about it. Bundy stuck his finger into his other fist and said, ‘When you know where to put your thing, mate, that baby’s banjaxed. Nobody’s going to want to ride her any more.’ Everybody laughed but I looked at him for a bit and suddenly I got it. So I went for him.
I must have got in a couple of good punches, but when I woke up it was all over. My head got the worst of it. Don’t know how long it took. Mr Sykes was looking at me there on the ground.
‘He fell off the fence, Mr Sykes,’ somebody said.
‘There was a bunch of us sitting there and he started laughing at something and went over backwards, Mr Sykes.’
‘Clem the Clumsy, that’s what happened, Mr Sykes.’
I tried to sit up and I was going to have it out with whoever said that stupid thing but sitting up didn’t work and Mr Sykes took their story. They got me inside and somebody thought it would be a good idea to take me to the hospital to check me out.
From Clem.
WEDNESDAY, JULY 8
ONE BANANA SMOOTHIE AND FOUR STRAWS
Dear Gram
I just spoke with Violet on Dad’s phone. I didn’t say anything about the thing with Bundy. Some things are different these days. Even over the phone I can feel her beside me, her long hair on the breeze, eyes dark and deep. She is so incredible.
Dad’s real pleased about Violet and you bet that makes me glad. He hasn’t mentioned Lyndal for ages but I’m OK about that. She works in the same place as him and perhaps they weren’t all that serious and I got it wrong.
I am in the zone with Violet. Her mum and dad want us all to go to lunch sometime. Maybe I’ll take them to the smoothie bar and we can all share the smoothie this time.
‘One banana smoothie and four straws please.’ Ha, ha.
I’m signing off.
Clem.
THURSDAY, JULY 9
THE SESSION OF SECRETS
Dear Gram
Session with the Rev.
‘Clem, I’ve got something important to discuss. Do you mind if I come straight out with it?’
‘OK,’ I said. He was very straight up this time.
‘Of all the people you could have picked a fight with, why Bundy?’
Out of nowhere I said, ‘Sometimes you have to dance on the battlefield.’
He looked at me with that raised eyebrow thing and I said, ‘I don’t get it either, but it’s the truth. And anyway, that bike owed me something and if anyone was going to burn it down it should have been me.’
The Rev just looked at me and said, ‘Uh huh.’
Then I looked at him and said, ‘How did you know about Bundy and the fight?’
And he looked at me and said, ‘How did you know about Bundy and the fire?’
And I said, ‘I reckon the coppers have got a bit of fingerprinting to do among the Trangias and I’ve seen Bundy’s hands close up and I reckon I’ve probably got those same fingerprints on my skull.’
The Rev had this secret smile that he sometimes gets like when something is going down in class but he already knows about it.
Then I said, ‘What do I do if Violet finds out?’
And he said, ‘I’d also be a bit worried about Mrs H if I were you.’
Short. Sharp. Session over.
Anyway, my eyes are looking in the same direction as each other so the concussion must have eased up.
Holidays next week so I’d better be looking straight. Extra time with Violet and I don’t want to miss a single blink.
Love from visionary Clem.
SATURDAY, JULY 25
THE CLAM OPENS UP
Dear Gram
Violet and me have spent a lot of time together on these holidays. This week we went out with her mum and dad. They are really nice. But I was still a bit nervous about the Bundy fight and what if I say something stupid. Needn’t have worried.
We met at the smoothie bar and I ordered ‘one banana smoothie and four straws’. Even the guy behind the smoothie bar broke up and I didn’t even get to Mars on that one but I was on fire on the inside like the old redskin days.
So we had our smoothies and I ordered Wild Berry coz I remembered the yoghurt and my question about how to hold on to a girlfriend. Violet had my favourite, banana, which was really excepto of her, so I sneaked in another straw and we laughed about that. And her dad even paid for them all.
They don’t know my dad but they know the place where he works coz the head office is right there in the main street and I said that he goes away for work a lot, but not much since Gram died. Then what I just said caught up to my ears and I had to stop talking and so they stopped talking too.
And now I can start writing again coz I had to stop writing for a bit there. I was up front about school because it is such a madaz place and I said that normal school found me hard to handle but this one is OK. And I told them about the bike track and the races and Violet’s dad said that it all sounded very positive.
Violet’s mum really likes that I bought her the bracelet. And Violet was wearing it, which made me smile inside as well as outside.
Then something mad happened. We finished the smoothies and Violet’s dad said, ‘How about we go out for a nice lunch?’ And I was OK about that and thought we’d get a sub, but we went to this place where they put menus on the table for you. Mr Carter said, ‘Let’s just order a bunch of stuff and share it around.’ and that’s what we did. So we had prawns and fish pieces and spring rolls and little bowls of sauce to dip it all in and they had the coldest Coke I have ever had. And even though it was only lunch we didn’t leave there for ages and we were talking through it all.
And they asked me more about school and so I went in headfirst. And I told them that we learned about lots of things apart from bike racing like metaphors and onomatopoeia and rap-running and things that normal school never taught me.
When I was talking Violet’s mum and dad were smiling and sometimes they would give each other a quick look with a grin. I didn’t like the
quick looks so much but I liked it when they smiled. My dad could take a lesson from them.
It was like ‘Clem the Clam Opens at The Opera House’ which is a visual joke, Gram, can you see it? I’ve never spoken so much even in group, but Violet was there and when she smiles I just open up. Still, I hope her mum and dad didn’t think I was off or anything.
That bracelet must be the smartest thing I’ve ever done.
Love from Redskin Ready Clem.
WEDNESDAY, JULY 29
SOME THINGS YOU HAVE TO FIND OUT FOR YOURSELF
Dear Gram
Time to get high. We did the high ropes course again. It’s the best fun but when we started out I was nervous as. We have to climb up rope ladders to get to the walk rope, and have you ever tried to climb a rope ladder? It’s madaz coz they keep twisting and running away from your feet.
We’ve been asking for ages how high the ropes are but Mr Sykes won’t tell us.
‘One day we’ll have to get to that,’ is what he keeps saying. So this time we were asking him again and somebody said, ‘Why don’t we measure it?’
Mr Sykes said, ‘That’s a good idea, how are you going to do it?’
Nobody could think of anything straight up until Pete said, ‘Why not get a bit of string and let it down from the ropes to the ground and then we can run the string along the ground and step it out?’
Mr Sykes smiled at Pete and said, ‘You know? You could give that a go.’
But Jacko, being Jacko, looked straight at Mr Sykes and said, ‘That won’t work.’
Mr Sykes said, ‘Why not?’
Whacko Jacko said, ‘Because we want to know how high it is, not how long it is.’