Sold to the Alpha

by Cara Wylde

  “Is that what you want? For me to be angry at you? To yell at you?”

  “I… I…” She hung her head defeated, realizing how wrong everything sounded. If he had lashed out on her, then she could have taken the verbal blows and then felt better about herself. Doing something bad and then not being punished for it was a terrible thing to bear.

  “Avelyn, of course I’m angry, but I’m also aware that it won’t do us any good if I start throwing a tantrum. When I went up to check on you during the party and you weren’t in the bedroom, nor in the Crescent tower, I was furious. But then, the moment I saw you lying there, on the ground, blood everywhere, your hair full of leaves and pine needles, all that anger flew out the window. You’re alive and you’re healthy, that’s all that matters.”

  “Healthy…”

  “I am angry at Sabine for having done this to you, but… I can’t hate her. I’m sorry, maybe I should. I can’t.”

  Avelyn lifted her head and looked into his eyes. There was something in his voice, a hint of deep regret, of something unsolved and so painful that most people couldn’t have lived with it.

  “Sabine lost everything once. I don’t know how much she told you and how much of it she altered. I am angry that she hurt you trying to get to me, but the more I think of it, the more I turn this whole mess on all sides, the more I realize that none of you two is really to blame. Your running away, her betrayal and revenge… they were reactions. You were both reacting to things I did in the past. If anything, I should be angry at myself.”

  Avelyn studied him wearily, trying to take in his words and make sense of them, trying to see how they fit in the picture.

  “But there’s enough time for anger and regret,” he continued. “Right now, we have to focus on what we can do to make things better. I need you to tell me everything, Avelyn. Everything from the moment you came to the Schloss to the moment you and Sabine ended up face to face in the woods and she bit you. I need to know. We must find her as soon as possible, and you might have information that can be useful to us. There can be clues in what Sabine told you. We have to know how she thinks, what she wants, what her endgame is.”

  Avelyn sighed. This was the moment she had dreaded, the moment when she had to let down her guard, break down the walls, and let him in, let him see her as she was. It was the moment of truth, and she was determined to spare no details even if it made her heart bleed and there was a fair chance he wouldn’t want to be with her anymore. There was only so much love could take and forgive. She ran her hands through her red curls, pulling at the knots and trying to smooth it down. He was waiting for her to start, and she bit her lip, inhaled, exhaled, tried to put her thoughts in order and decide where to start. It would be his turn later, after she’d have finished. He would have to tell her the real story behind Sabine’s imprisonment, but, until then, she knew she had to be the one to break the ice. Catching Sabine before she hurt anyone else depended on what she could remember of their long conversations through her cell door. So, Avelyn arranged her pillow and made herself comfortable. She tried to look into Max’s eyes as she spoke, but when she’d reach a particularly delicate issue, she’d avert her gaze and make long pauses. He listened to her patiently, smiled encouragingly, and squeezed her fingers from time to time. The sunset bathed the room in a warm, red light, but they paid it no mind. For them, time stood still.

  After telling Max how she had decided to seduce him to gain his trust so he’d let her out of the room, Avelyn made a short pause and got up to pour herself a glass of water. It was getting more and more difficult. She could see in his eyes that every word she said hurt him deeply. She drank greedily and asked him if he was thirsty.

  “No, thanks. I want to hear the rest of the story.”

  Avelyn massaged her temples, unsure how to phrase her thoughts. “You have to know that I’ve never lied to you about my feelings. The moment I told you I loved you, I meant it.”

  “I remember it took you some time to say the words,” he said with a weak, sad smile.

  “But when I did, I was sure of it.”

  “In that case, young lady, it sounds like you fell into your own trap, am I right?”

  Avelyn laughed and her shoulders relaxed. “It’s what I do best, apparently.” She filled the glass again and set it on the nightstand, within reach. She sat down in front of him and looked him in the eyes, determined to hold his gaze as she told him the next part. He deserved that much. “Earlier, you wanted to know why I was so angry at Christine.”

  “Yes…” His eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

  “Before…” Her voice cracked, so she swallowed heavily and started again. “Before we went all the way for the first time, I wanted to make sure I didn’t get pregnant. I was completely focused on my plan to escape the Schloss, and I couldn’t risk having your baby and changing my mind.” She saw how all the blood drained from Max’s face. He was livid, and his eyes had lost their usual sparkle. “I asked Christine to help me. She was the only friend I had, so I tried to convince her that I wasn’t ready to have a baby… that I wasn’t prepared… the idea of becoming a mother scared me… She seemed to understand. She gave me an herbal mixture that was supposed to take care of this problem, and I had to take three drops with my tea every day. Silly me, right? It probably did nothing, and Christine only wanted me to take my mind off it and let go.”

  Max tried to swallow past the lump that had risen in his throat, but didn’t have much success. He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t trust his voice. Avelyn was still holding his gaze, and she seemed sincere. Ruthlessly sincere.

  “Now you know. That’s why I was so shocked this morning when you and the doctor gave me the news. The more I think of it, though, the more I realize that, deep down, I had known all along. I wanted to believe that what Christine had given me could protect me from a pregnancy, but it was because I had no other option. Somehow, I knew it wouldn’t work, but staying away from you was awfully tiring and frustrating. I wanted you. Yes, I guess that’s it. I wanted you more than I wanted my plan to work. It’s stupid. It was like I was sabotaging myself. Anyway, by the Seed Moon, I had changed my mind and didn’t want to leave anymore. The morning right before the full moon ceremony I woke up and saw you next to me, and that was the happiest moment of my life. For the first time, I didn’t feel alone. I felt like I belonged. With you. I couldn’t deny that I had fallen in love with you and the month we spent together had made me change my dreams, my hopes for the future. I didn’t see myself in Italy anymore, on foreign streets, surrounded by strangers, trying to start over and make it on my own two feet. Instead, I saw myself with you, and the realization that I didn’t want to run away anymore came as a relief.”

  “What happened?”

  Avelyn gave a short, sinister chuckle. “I lost your mother’s bracelet in the dungeons.”

  Max flinched.

  “After Christine left for the party, I went down there to retrieve it, and as I was coming back, I heard a girl crying.”

  He sighed and hung his head in defeat. From that point on he could, more or less, guess what had happened. For a split second, he couldn’t stop himself from wondering how different everything would have been if she hadn’t lost her bracelet in the dungeons, or if he hadn’t given it to her in the first place. Such tiny details. Change one of them, and life takes a whole different turn. None of this would have happened, and it would have given him time to see his mistake and tell her the truth. Avelyn continued her story, insisting on the smallest things she could remember, on every word Sabine had told her. She knew she was missing things, but she was doing her best. Max listened to her carefully, conflicting emotions flickering in his eyes from time to time. Curiosity, rage, bewilderment… he even smiled once or twice. She couldn’t help feeling like a naïve fool. Now that she was going over all her discussions with Sabine, she could see the gaps in the girl’s story, the things that didn’t quite fit, the red flags she should have seen if only she had trie
d to think straight and not let herself blinded by that deceiving, crippling feeling of utter injustice which had clouded her judgment. She talked and talked, getting it all out of her system. By the time she finished, it was already dark and her stomach rumbled in protest, reminding her she hadn’t eaten all day.

  When silence fell, Max rested his head in his palms and rubbed at his eyes. He was sitting crossed legged across from her, and he hadn’t touched her or squeezed her hand in reassurance in over an hour. Avelyn bit her lower lip and fought the tears which were stinging the back of her eyes. She had no right to cry. He finally looked up at her, but she couldn’t read his face. It was an impenetrable mask, and trying to guess what was hiding behind it would have been a failed attempt.

  “Let’s go see what we can find in the kitchen.” He sat up and offered her his hand. Avelyn looked at it for a long moment, then took it. His fingers curled over hers, and he pulled her gently, helping her rise to her feet. He waited for her to slip her shoes on, never letting go of her hand.

  CHAPTER TWO

  A Glimmer of Hope

  Avelyn had slept almost until lunch. She had felt Max leave in the morning, and she remembered the soft touch of his kiss on her forehead and the sleepy smile she gave him without opening her eyes. He had held her close all night, making her feel safe and protected. As she got out of bed and went to pull the heavy curtains away to let the sun invade the room, she thought of his reaction to everything she had told him the other night. She still couldn’t wrap her mind around it. She hadn’t expected him to be so calm and understanding. She stretched her arms above her head and enjoyed the small pops of her bones and how they released the tension in her joints. She wondered if Christine would bring her lunch as she used to before everything went to hell, but she didn’t ponder on it too much. Before anything else, she needed a shower.

  Avelyn stepped into the bathroom and caught her reflection in the mirror. She studied the scar on her neck and traced it with her fingers, shuddering when the sensitive skin tissue tingled. Her gaze went up to the huge bags under her eyes, and she gasped when she realized how clearly she could see every detail of her face when she was still standing near the door. The mirror was on the other side of the room. “Wow…” she whispered. She touched the bridge of her nose, surprised she could see the tiny freckles covering it from such a great distance. Before, she had to get really close to the mirror and almost stuck her nose to the cold glass to see the tiny imperfections on her fair complexion. She smiled, then took off her clothes and turned on the shower only to jump a few feet away, hands flying up to cover her ears. “Shit! That is loud!” The soft spray of water hitting the glass walls of the shower cabin that covered the entire wall behind the crystal bathtub sounded like a raging storm inside her head. She moved as fast as she could and turned it off, but had to catch herself and lean on the shower cabin when the entire bathroom started spinning around her. She closed her eyes and waited for the sudden dizziness to go away. She felt slightly sick to her stomach.

  “Fuck… this isn’t going to be easy, is it?” She rubbed her temples and straightened her back when she felt ready to stand without having to support herself. She looked around, sighed, and decided the shower would have to wait. She wasn’t ready for a second aural adventure with the water spray from hell. She grabbed a bathrobe to cover her naked body, then crossed the bathroom as slowly as possible, unsure how to control her own speed. She knew she had moved at her normal speed from the bedroom to the bathroom, but now that she was aware her body could move way faster than that, she was careful not to give herself another vertigo. “Pfff… so much for reading ‘Twilight’. Stupid fiction. Made me think that moving fast for the first time would be a blast.”

  She heard Christine before the old woman had even reached the landing on the third floor. The soft clink of the porcelain cup when it hit the edge of the plate, and the light sound of Christine’s shoes as they touched the floor rhythmically. Avelyn stood frozen in the middle of the room, focusing on all these small details. When she knew the woman was close, she went to open the door.

  “Good morning, child!” Christine smiled and went past her to place the tray on the glass table. She didn’t seem surprised that Avelyn had heard her before reaching the room.

  “Hey!”

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Dizzy. A bit sick. I couldn’t shower.” She sat down on the sofa, eying the tray of food wearily. She could smell the soup and the steamed vegetables, but she couldn’t decide if she liked it or not.

  “You poor thing.” Christine sat across from her, on a leather chair. She seemed genuinely concerned. “The first few days are going to be a bit difficult as your body starts getting used to the new sensations. The best thing to do is to take it slowly. You should go out, walk around, focus on the new changes and test the waters, so to speak. You have to learn to keep up with your body’s transformation, because it’s going to be an ongoing process until the next full moon. If you think you’re moving fast now, wait till you see how fast you’ll be able to move by the end of the month.”

  “It sounds awfully scary.” Avelyn chewed on her lower lip and reached over to lift the lid off the first plate. She scrunched her nose and let it fall back down.

  “I know, child, but it will get easier. You need to eat, though. You skipped breakfast, and that’s just not acceptable in your condition.”

  “My condition…” Avelyn touched her stomach and closed her eyes for a moment. “Why did you do it?” She raised her chin and looked at Christine, her hard eyes and furrowed brows demanding a straight answer.

  The old woman sighed. “I had to.”

  “You lied to me. I thought you were my friend. I trusted you, and you lied to me.”

  “Avelyn…” She hesitated. The young woman’s words had cut like a knife. She felt her chest contract in pain. “I couldn’t let you leave him. The moment you told me you weren’t ready to have a child, I sensed that something was wrong, that your heart was not entirely in the relationship.”

  “How did you know I still wanted to run away?”

  “I didn’t. You’re quite an actress, you know…” Christine gave her a small, mischievous smile. “But I couldn’t take any risks. You see, Max was completely in love with you and he knew that if he wanted to make it work, he had to let his guard down and trust you. The thing that pained me most was that you were kind of underestimating him. Never make the mistake to believe that he wasn’t aware he was taking a huge risk trusting you. He did. Every time he left the Schloss he had to overcome the fear that you might not be there when he came back, but he knew there was no other way. I, on the other hand, couldn’t take the risks he was taking. Avelyn, you are the right one for him. You are his soul mate. The herbal mixture I gave you was actually supposed to help you get pregnant. It increased your period of fertility.”

  Avelyn let herself fall on the sofa, her shoulder blades hitting the backrest with a soft thud. “I can’t believe it…”

  “If you had his child, you wouldn’t have left him, I was sure of that. It would have brought you two together. I know it was unfair to make this decision for you, but I did the right thing at that time. You were so blinded by your shiny dreams of freedom, so unaware of how difficult it would be for you to make it out there on your own, that you completely ignored your feelings for him. You were ready to sacrifice your love for… what? For a child’s dream. Your happiness was right there, staring you in the face, and all you could think of was how to avoid it.”

  “That doesn’t make any sense. Christine, you’re just fantasizing. You don’t know me. You don’t know what I wanted then or what I want now.”

  “Oh, I know you too well, my dear. I know you better than you know yourself. You’re afraid of love. At Alma Venus, you never felt like you belonged. You never felt wanted. So, when Max came along and offered you all those things you’d craved for, you got scared and pulled back. It’s a simple system of self-defense, of self-preservati
on. As much as you wanted to let go and take the love and protection he was giving you, you were also frightened that it wouldn’t last, that it would hurt so much more to have and then lose these things, than to never experience them at all. You stubbornly focused on your initial plan to escape, because that was your comfort zone.”

  Avelyn’s eyes were wide with disbelief. She didn’t know what to do. She felt like laughing, and she would have really liked to laugh in Christine’s face, but, at the same time, the old woman had touched on some things Avelyn had always preferred to keep buried deep down. The insecurities, the painful feeling that no one wanted her… Her mother didn’t want her, since she left her at Alma Venus. Alma Venus didn’t want her either. Monique Delacroix had assessed the situation and decided she was worth buying, but that didn’t count as anything but pure business. The frustration of always having everything thrust upon her: classes, workshops, interviews, a husband. The impossibility of taking control of her own life, of being happy and accomplished on her own terms. Christine was spot on. Avelyn clenched her jaw.

  “Avelyn… It comes from Latin. “Avis” means bird.” The she-wolf gave her a warm, kind smile. “It was the first thing I asked you when you came here, but you didn’t want to answer me. I knew the answer all along, I just wanted to hear it from you.”

  “It would have sounded ironical at that particular moment.” Her voice cracked slightly, but she swallowed her impending tears and willed her mind to stay clear.

  “You’ve always been the only one to trap yourself. No one else. That was the moment to spread your wings and claim your freedom. Running away to some distant country, trying to make it among strangers… you would have forever avoided love, protection, and happiness because they would’ve been states you never knew and understood, and the only one who could teach you how to live with them would have been left behind, here, at the Schloss. But you know now.”