The Color of Love

by Julianne MacLean

  o0o

  Though it was early summer, the blooms were out in full color. I pulled to a stop in the yard, removed my sunglasses and leaned forward over the steering wheel to peruse the property, which was located on the banks of a large, private lake.

  The house was rustic-looking with pale gray cedar shakes and white trim. The yard had been lovingly landscaped with a wide green lawn that appeared freshly cut, classic evergreen shrubs, plenty of colorful flowers and a screened-in gazebo.

  I opened the door and got out. A tremendous and unexpected feeling of joy flowed through me at the peacefulness—except of course for the sounds of the birds chirping and the insects buzzing in the trees.

  The screen door on the house opened and slammed shut. Aaron was coming to greet us.

  My whole body came alive with a zap of electricity at the sight of him, so different from how he’d looked when we last parted.

  He appeared strong, healthy and robust, and there was color in his cheeks. He’d gained back the weight he’d lost during his time on the island, but still looked slender and fit. I could barely think or move as he crossed the lawn toward us, approaching with a smile and a wave.

  Kaleigh was the first to run toward him and throw her arms around his waist. I was shocked by this—that she would feel so at ease with him.

  “I can’t believe it’s really you!” she said. “You don’t look the same at all!”

  “I certainly feel better,” he cheerfully replied, never taking his eyes off mine.

  Those penetrating, smiling blue eyes… They still knocked me over, just like before.

  No. Even more so now.

  “Hi Aaron,” I said warmly, and walked toward him.

  Kaleigh stepped aside and I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, felt him take me by the waist and pull me close. His lips touched my neck and he whispered in my ear, “It’s so good to see you.”

  “You, too,” I replied as I forced myself to draw back and look him in the eye, so that I could introduce him to someone else.

  “This is Malcolm,” I said.

  Malcolm, dressed in his usual Gothic black ensemble, with lip ring and tattoo on fine display, strode forward reservedly.

  “Malcolm, this is Aaron Cameron,” I added.

  They shook hands.

  “It’s nice to meet you, Malcolm,” Aaron said. “Do you all want to come inside? I don’t know if you’re hungry. I was thinking of boiling some mussels.”

  “I love mussels,” Kaleigh replied, and we followed Aaron into the house.

  o0o

  The interior was cozy and cottagey, like something out of a dream, with large French windows overlooking the lake, and floor-to-ceiling bookcases along the far wall. Soft upholstered sofas and chairs sat on a wide plank floor of aged pine, with plenty of nicks and stress marks under our feet.

  “It’s so peaceful,” I said, moving closer to the windows to look out. There was a small wharf with a shed and a single Adirondack chair facing the water. “Do you fish?”

  “All the time,” he replied. “It’s funny, I was so sick of eating fish on the island. I thought if I ever made it home, I’d never eat fish again, but now I crave it. And I can’t seem to go more than a few days without casting a line.”

  “Looks like they’re jumping,” I said, pointing to the circular ripples on the water.

  “They’re catching insects.” He moved to the kitchen area and dumped a bowl of live mussels into a large pot on the stove.

  “Malcolm, do you like to fish?” Aaron asked.

  I turned to see Malcolm perusing the bookshelves, and was eager, myself, to go and see what Aaron liked to read.

  Malcolm turned. “I don’t know. I’ve never tried it.”

  “We could give it a go today if you want?” Aaron replied. “Sometimes I sit out on the dock, but I have the best luck when I take the rowboat out to the center of the lake where it’s deep.”

  “I’ve never been in a rowboat before either,” Malcolm quietly said, then he spotted Aaron’s guitar on a stand in the corner of the room and approached it. “Do you play?” he asked with interest.

  “Yes,” Aaron replied, moving toward him. “I used to give lessons, but now I just play for fun.”

  Malcolm squatted down before the guitar to look at it more closely. “It’s a Gibson J-29. That’s a fine instrument.”

  “I just bought it last month,” Aaron replied, “because I had to get everything new after being presumed dead. You can give it a try if you like.”

  “Maybe later.” Malcolm rose to his feet.

  Meanwhile, Kaleigh had plunked herself down on the sofa and was examining a brain teaser on the coffee table.

  As I watched Aaron return to the kitchen and set a stack of four plates on the counter, I marveled at the fact that this situation could have been dreadfully awkward, but everything seemed effortless and relaxed. I didn’t know what it was about Aaron Cameron that made everyone feel so at ease. He must be a fantastic therapist, I thought.

  “Can I do anything to help?” I asked, strolling into the kitchen.

  “Sure. Why don’t we get the kids to help us take everything out to the gazebo? There’s a picnic table out there. It’s screened in, no bugs. These mussels will only take a few minutes to open up. Would you like a glass of wine?”

  “I’d love one.”

  He opened the fridge and withdrew a bottle of white and opened it with a cork screw. Then he poured us each a glass and said to Kaleigh and Malcolm: “Why don’t you two make yourselves useful and carry the plates and bread outside?”

  Kaleigh leaped off the sofa to help, while Malcolm sauntered over casually.

  “Do you like to swim?” Kaleigh asked Malcolm as she backed out the door.

  “Yeah,” he replied, following with the cutlery. “Especially when it’s hot.”

  “I wonder if it’s deep enough to jump off the dock,” she added.

  As soon as they left the house, I turned to Aaron. “I hope this is okay,” I said. “I wasn’t sure how to handle it.”

  “You handled it perfectly,” he said. “Let’s just have a nice time. Maybe I’ll take him out in the boat later.”

  “So you can talk, and figure out how to handle things from here?” I added, and he nodded at me.

  o0o

  We had a nice time in the gazebo eating mussels and dipping bread in the creamy broth. Malcolm was curious about Aaron’s experiences on the island, and Aaron regaled us with tales of the plane crash and stories of how he caught hares and lit fires without matches.

  Malcolm was utterly fascinated and I was pleased to see how they interacted with each other, without awkwardness or resentment.

  There were moments, however, when I found myself thinking of what the nurse had told me about Aaron’s first night in the hospital when he’d become agitated and had required a sedative. I wondered how he was coping since his return to normal life. He seemed fine, but I wasn’t sure if some of that was just for show. Or maybe he really was fully recovered, now that he was home again and living in a spot like this.

  After we polished off the mussels, Malcolm and Kaleigh went outside to explore the yard and dock. The gazebo door swung shut behind them, and Aaron and I found ourselves sitting alone with the bottle of wine between us.

  He poured me a second glass and refilled his own.

  “I don’t know how I can ever thank you,” he said as he leaned forward over the table, regarding me intently. “Sometimes I wonder if you’re some kind of angel from heaven. I feel like you keep saving me.”

  I shook my head. “You saved yourself on that island. How are you coping, by the way?”

  He took a deep breath and let it out. “I still have nightmares sometimes, and occasionally I can get a bit emotional, but I’m working through it. Each day is better than the last, and this particular day… This is the best by far.”

  I smiled. “Well, the fact that we found Malcolm…” I shook my head in disbelief. “It’s crazy, isn
’t it? Maybe there is some element of fate at work here. What are the odds that Kaleigh would end up in a guitar class with your son? And that they would figure out the connection?”

  “How did they figure it out?” he asked.

  I sighed heavily. “It’s a long story and I’m not even sure where to begin.” I reached for a piece of bread and tugged it apart with my fingers. “I can’t lie. He had a rough childhood, Aaron, and from what I understand his mother never told him the truth about you, not until she saw news about the plane crash over a year ago. That’s when she told Malcolm that his father had been killed in the crash. Kaleigh happened to ask him what happened to his dad, and when he told her about that, she immediately put two and two together. I should also mention that she had a bit of a crush on Malcolm. That’s why they got to talking about personal stuff.”

  Aaron frowned. “She’s only thirteen.”

  I ran a hand through my hair. “I know, and believe me, I wasn’t happy about it when I found out, but I think it’s okay now. He didn’t even know how old she was because she lied about that. When he found out, he was pretty angry with her.”

  “I’m glad,” Aaron replied, still frowning with concern as he turned to look out the screened windows. Malcolm and Kaleigh were skipping stones on the pebbly beach. “I’ll talk to him,” he said.

  “Don’t make a big deal about it,” I replied. “I don’t want him to feel like he screwed everything up. It wasn’t his fault, it was Kaleigh’s, and he hasn’t had much luck in life so far.”

  “Him and me, both.” Aaron turned to face me again and took another sip of wine. A small breeze blew a part in his brown hair and I felt a funny little sensation in my belly at how handsome he looked.

  “So are you still seeing What’s-His-Name?” Aaron asked.

  “Josh?” I replied with a chuckle. “Yes.”

  Aaron bowed his head. “I hope he’s a good guy. No wait… No I don’t.” His eyes lifted and he gave me a heated look. “I’d prefer it if he was an ass, if you really must know.”

  I laughed and raised an eyebrow. “Are you flirting with me, Dr. Cameron?”

  He recognized the question as a replay from a moment we’d shared many months ago, but this time he answered differently.

  “Yes, I am, Ms. Matthews. And it’s a good thing Officer Josh isn’t here. He might slap a set of cuffs on me.”

  I took another bite of bread. “So you know he’s a cop. Did I tell you that before?”

  “No, but I did a little research on my own. Kaleigh’s on Twitter you know. She posts hints about things every once in a while. You’re following her I hope.”

  “Of course. And you are as well?”

  “Yeah, I couldn’t help it. I wanted to stay in touch with the two of you somehow, but I didn’t want to come off like a stalker.”

  “So you followed my daughter on Twitter? That’s not stalkerish at all.”

  We shared a laugh and sipped some more wine.

  Aaron slowly spun his wineglass around by the stem. “Can I ask…?” He hesitated a moment, then gazed at me with interest. “Is it serious between you and this illustrious law enforcement officer?”

  Feeling warm all of a sudden, I shrugged out of my white sweater, folded it and set it on the picnic table bench beside me.

  “I’m supposed to have dinner with him tonight,” I replied. “I think he might want to propose.”

  Something flashed in Aaron’s eyes, then his shoulders rose and fell with a deep intake of breath. “Damn,” he softly said. “Will you say yes?”

  I felt no desire to be cryptic. “I don’t know. I’m not positive he’s the one.” I gazed out at the lake. “You’d think it would be easier to know these things. Especially the second time around.”

  “If you have doubts,” Aaron said, “you shouldn’t rush into anything.”

  “That’s what I think, but there are a lot of women out there—good friends of mine—who think I’d be a total nut to say no.”

  “It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks,” Aaron said. “You’re the only one whose opinion matters in this.”

  “Thank you, doctor. I appreciate the vote of confidence. I need to remember that there are choices. The sun won’t rise and fall forever on this one decision. It will rise again tomorrow, just like it always does, regardless.”

  I felt caught suddenly in the striking color of his eyes and couldn’t help but admire the broad cut of his shoulders in the shaded light of the gazebo. His masculine appeal caused a commotion in me.

  He stared at me for a long while and I felt completely beguiled. I should have looked away, but I couldn’t bring myself to leave the spell I was under. It was like some kind of drug.

  The door to the gazebo swung open just then and Kaleigh peeked her head in to ask a question. “Can we go fishing off the dock?”

  Aaron grinned at me as if to say we’d continue this later, then he rose from his place at the table.

  “Sure. How about you guys help us clear away the mess? Then I’ll get out the rods.”

  “You’ll have to show us how,” she said, moving to gather up the plates. “Neither of us has ever fished before.”

  “No problem,” he replied. “It’s not hard. You’ll love it.”

  Malcolm came in to help as well, but it took me a moment to reboot my brain before I could join them.

  o0o

  When no one experienced even the smallest nibble after about twenty minutes, and the idea was presented that the rowboat should be launched, Kaleigh and I offered to remain on shore while the men rowed out to the center of the lake where the fish were jumping.

  I was proud of Kaleigh for understanding that Aaron and Malcolm needed time alone to talk.

  Before long, the mosquitoes appeared, so we decided to wait inside the house and watch from the windows.

  I found Aaron’s coffeemaker and filters and started a pot, then wrestled Kaleigh into helping me do the dishes.

  Every few minutes I checked out the window to see how the men were doing. They were still fishing. I hoped Aaron had bug spray in his tackle box.

  After we finished tidying the kitchen, Kaleigh sat down on the sofa to attempt the brain teaser game again, while I poured myself a cup of coffee and watched her. When at last she solved the puzzle, I decided to give it a try, so she got up to go and check out Aaron’s books.

  I was deeply focused on the game when I heard her call out to me. “Mom, look what I found.”

  “Hold on a second,” I said, moving a piece of the puzzle from one spot to another.

  “No, you have to look,” she said. “It’s Dad’s journal.”

  My eyes lifted and everything seemed to happen in slow motion as she stood in front of the bookshelves, opening it to the first page.

  Chapter Sixty-six

  “That’s private.” I rose to my feet. “You shouldn’t look at it.”

  She didn’t appear to have heard me. She was too deeply engrossed in what she was reading.

  “Kaleigh,” I repeated. “Put it away. It’s private.”

  “Wow,” she said, still not hearing me at all. “Mom, you have to read this.”

  “No,” I said, crossing the room and snatching it out of her grasp. “I’m not going to read it and neither should you. How would you feel if someone read your diary?”

  She looked up at me in shock. “I didn’t think of it that way.”

  “Well, that’s the way it is. This is Aaron’s private journal. He was very generous to share certain parts of it with us, and it was nice of him today to tell us all those stories in the gazebo, but we shouldn’t read this.”

  Her eyes were wide. She looked pale.

  “What’s the matter?” I asked. “You look like you saw a ghost.”

  She shook her head. “Not a ghost. It was something else.”

  I wish I could say I told her to keep it to herself, but the temptation was too great. I was entranced by everything to do with Aaron, and to be presented with someth
ing he had written while stranded on the island was too much for me to resist. “What was it?”

  Kaleigh stared at me uncertainly for several seconds, as if she wasn’t quite sure if she should tell me. Then she glanced down at the book in my hands. “The stuff that’s written on top of Dad’s entries… Those are love letters,” she finally confessed.

  I frowned and looked down at the book. “What do you mean?”

  My blood began to race.

  “They’re all written to you.”

  o0o

  A half hour later, I’d read what I could decipher from the vertical writings that crisscrossed over the horizontal lines. At first it was mostly a record of the events that had occurred, similar to the entries written by Seth that Aaron had transcribed and sent to Gladys.

  Towards the end, however, there were no further entries about what Aaron caught for dinner, or how he ran from a bear. Every page was a promise—always something specific and concrete—like a vow to take me to a particular movie or cook me a special dinner, and never to disappoint me.

  The last thing I read, he had promised to buy me the house I wanted by the lake, with purple flowers.

  Eventually I realized that Kaleigh was sitting beside me on the sofa with her hand on my back, asking, “Are you okay, Mom?”

  I stood up and walked to the window, and looked down at the flower boxes full of purple and violet petunias.

  The screen door opened suddenly and I could barely see straight through my blurry wet eyes. Holding the journal in my hands, I turned to face Aaron.

  He stopped just inside the door, fishing rod in one hand, bucket of fish in the other, and all the color drained from his face.

  “You weren’t supposed to see that,” he said.

  Stomach churning, I set it down on the window sill. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

  “Did you read it?”

  Unable to lie to him, I nodded.

  His Adam’s apple bobbed and he bent forward to set down the bucket of fish and lean the rod up against the wall.

  The door swung open and Malcolm followed him in. “Did you guys see what we caught?” he asked. “They were biting like crazy!”

  “You had a good time?” I asked, not wanting to spoil what had been a perfect day for Malcolm.