The Lost Fallen

by L. C. Mortimer

  The biggest problem was that Wrath looked normal. He didn’t have angelic scarring. He didn’t have scars from horns being cut off his head. He didn’t have anything. He just looked like an ordinary guy who wanted what every good, hardworking person wanted: a normal life.

  “Serenity,” he tried again, and finally he sighed. “I know you’re a lost fallen, okay?”

  She dropped the plate she was washing so suddenly that it landed on top of another dish and cracked. She turned around, her heart pounding in her chest. How could he know? She hadn’t heard that phrase in ages, not since she first realized there were people who hunted her kind. After Oliver’s death, there had been magic users lurking near the church where the funeral was held, and they’d been ready for her.

  She had escaped, but only barely, and she’d learned quickly to hide who – and what – she was.

  “Who sent you?” She asked. Was it the magic users? Were they going to capture her, once and for all? Were they going to hurt her? She didn’t have any power! There was nothing special left in her blood. The only thing that ran through Serenity’s veins was normal, average, ordinary, run-of-the-mill human A Positive.

  That was it.

  “Nobody,” he shook his head. “Look, I’m exactly who I said I was. I’m just a normal guy. I’m a cook, okay?”

  “But you weren’t always a cook.”

  “No.”

  “What were you?”

  “A demon.”

  She gasped. It wasn’t possible. Wrath couldn’t have been a demon. It was impossible.

  “You don’t have scars on your head,” she pointed out the obvious, but he just shrugged.

  “I do. They’re small. See?” He tilted his head forward and shifted some of his hair out of the way. Sure enough, two small, round scars were visible beneath a mop of brown hair.

  “How are they so tiny? Why are you human now? Where did you come from?”

  “I came from the demon realm,” he said. “And if we’re going to have this conversation, then I’m going to need some ice cream.”

  Chapter 9

  He took the bowl of chocolate ice cream from Serenity’s outstretched palms. Cold. It was still a sensation he wasn’t used to. When winter hit, it was really going to kill him. That much was for sure.

  “You have your ice cream. Now dish. What are you? Where are you from? Why are you here? And what do you want from me?”

  “That’s a lot of questions.”

  She just stared at him. It was perfect: her stare. She didn’t realize how cute she looked when she was staring at someone. Maybe she thought she was scary, but Serenity couldn’t be scary if she tried. She was much too sweet, too innocent. There was too much about her that she wore on her sleeve.

  “I turned human six months ago,” he finally said. “And I ended up here. On Earth. There’s not much more to the story.”

  “It wasn’t by choice, then. You didn’t want to be human.”

  “Does anyone?”

  She raised an eyebrow, obviously implying he was insane. She wanted to be human, after all. She had cut off her wings. For angels, becoming a human was a voluntary process. Demons didn’t have that luxury. If they pissed off enough of the otherworld, they could be converted to humans that day. They didn’t get a choice in much of anything.

  Yet another thing Wrath liked about Earth.

  Here he could be who he wanted, go where he wanted, do what he wanted. There weren’t limitations. There was nothing holding him back from being strong or wild or free. He could hunt or fish or jog. He could live anywhere. He could just be.

  And right now, what he wanted, more than anything else he could imagine, was to be with Serenity.

  “Why did they turn you, Wrath?” She dipped her spoon into her bowl of vanilla. It was pale and sweet, like her, but even vanilla ice cream wasn’t boring. Not the way Serenity seemed to eat it. She had sprinkled chocolate chips, sprinkles, and bits of nuts in her ice cream. Talk about bursts of flavor.

  “Because I was angry.”

  “About what?”

  “About everything.”

  “Not to stereotype,” Serenity said carefully. “But isn’t that one of the primary hallmarks of a demon? You guys are angry and vicious and mean?”

  “Isn’t a hallmark of an angel being sweet and demure?”

  “All right,” she rolled her eyes. “So not all stereotypes are true. Still, it’s not like demons are supposed to be friendly.”

  “They aren’t supposed to be so angry they’re completely out of control.”

  “What did you get angry about, Wrath? Surely there was something.” She watched him, carefully seeing how he would respond. She wasn’t judging him, though, which Wrath found quite interesting.

  “There are people who hurt fallen angels.”

  “I’m aware.”

  “I hunted them.”

  That did seem to surprise sweet Serenity. Her mouth formed a tiny “o” as she watched Wrath.

  “I had other jobs before I discovered what really happened to angels after a fall,” he said. “Other things brought me to Earth, but I always returned to my own realm. When I met a fallen, though, when I discovered what happened to make one of them a lost fallen, well, I knew I had to do something about it.

  “You’re quite the go-getter.”

  “I was mad, Serenity, and disappointed.”

  “In the humans.”

  “In everyone. Here I was, a demon, and I couldn’t even stop something as simple as someone killing a fallen angel. Angels already have a difficult enough time adjusting to their new lives on Earth without having to throw getting murdered into the mix. They don’t exactly warn you guys about this stuff, either.”

  “How did you know?”

  “How did I know what?”

  “How did you know they didn’t warn us? I mean…” She shrugged, looking helplessly around the room. He noticed how tiny her space was, how discreet it was. Serenity didn’t believe in “go big or go home.” Her entire apartment was small and although she had obviously lived there for a long time, there wasn’t much to see.

  She was ready to leave at a moment’s notice, he realized, and she must be constantly scared.

  How terrible it must be to live that way, to endure that way.

  “I met a woman.”

  “You?”

  He raised an eyebrow. “Surprised?”

  “You don’t seem the type to fall in love. No offense, Wrath, but you’re a bit rough around the edges.”

  “I wasn’t always this way,” he said quietly. “Someone changed me.”

  “An angel?”

  “A lost fallen.”

  “Oh.” Serenity fidgeted with her hands and then held them firmly on either side of her bowl of ice cream. “Tell me.”

  “She was beautiful, of course, but then, so are you. All angels are. It’s why humans are so fascinated with your kind.”

  “You aren’t exactly hard on the eyes, either, demon.”

  “I’m not a demon anymore.”

  “I call ‘em like I see ‘em.”

  “She wasn’t just pretty, though. She was sweet. Kind. She was lovely, Serenity, and she was delicate.”

  “She didn’t know she was being hunted.”

  “She didn’t know she was being hunted.”

  He took a bite of his ice cream, but he didn’t taste it. Not now. Not while he was thinking of the woman he had loved and the pain he had felt when she perished. No one could understand that pain until they experienced it themselves, and it was something he hoped no one ever had to.

  “Wrath?” Serenity placed her hand on his. He looked at it, confused. “Tell me what happened to her.”

  “Harmony,” he choked out. “Her name was Harmony.”

  “It’s a beautiful name,” Serenity agreed.

  “We were happy together. She had left the city. Said she didn’t feel comfortable around churches or temples, but neither one of us really knew why. She was drawn to t
hose special places, the holy places, but there was always something under the surface. She felt like she was being watched there. She decided she could pray on her own, that she didn’t have to be around a building just to worship.”

  “So you left.”

  “We left together. I wasn’t supposed to be away from my realm for that long, but I was a young demon. Headstrong. Didn’t really care what they did to me. So I didn’t have my powers for a little while? When I was with Harmony, I didn’t need them. And then one night, they came for her.”

  “How did they find her?”

  “It was stupid,” he shook his head. “A woman in the neighborhood was getting married. Asked us to come to the ceremony. Neither one of us wanted to, but we both figured we were overreacting. After all, what kind of angel feels uncomfortable around a church?”

  “One that isn’t an angel anymore.”

  “Harmony was all human at that point. She kept her scars covered, of course, because she didn’t like attention, but that day…that day was different.”

  It had been hot.

  Summer.

  They’d both been covered with a thin layer of sweat by the time they reached the church. Elizabeth and Edward were already inside, along with most of the other guests. Only a few remained outside.

  “Wait,” Harmony said. She slid off her jacket that covered her scars. “It’s too hot to wear this inside the church.”

  “Are you sure?” Wrath looked desperately around, but no one was paying them any attention. At least, no one that he noticed.

  “I’m sure,” Harmony smiled. “It’s silly to worry about my scars, isn’t it? I’m sure people won’t notice them as much as I think they do.”

  But she had been wrong.

  They had both been wrong.

  Wrath shook with sadness as he told Serenity how they had left the church after the wedding, laughing, happy. They had been walking home, arm-in-arm, when it happened.

  The footsteps.

  They heard them softly at first, but then louder. The steps grew closer and although Wrath was a large man, he was only one man, and he didn’t have his demon powers. Not on Earth. Not then. Not ever.

  Harmony heard the noises, too.

  “Wrath?” She whispered, but he shook his head. They were going to be fine.

  “Just keep going,” he said. “I’m sure it’s nothing.”

  It wasn’t nothing.

  They made it to her apartment as the group of magic users caught up to them. They tore through the building and into her tiny space. They pushed Wrath out of the way, tied him up, pinned him down.

  And then they hurt her.

  They killed his darling.

  They killed Harmony.

  It wasn’t enough, though. They took her blood, as much as they could, and then they left. His wails woke everyone in the building, everyone on the street. His wails of helplessness, of horror, could be heard for miles.

  He screamed into the darkness until he could scream no more, and then he let the night claim him.

  Chapter 10

  Serenity pushed her ice cream away from her.

  So that’s what happened to angels who stayed around.

  They were hunted down like dogs and tortured, hurt. They were killed. They were destroyed, and apparently, it was painful. She knew there was a reason she had left the area she’d lived with Oliver. She knew there was a reason she didn’t feel okay in crowds.

  She just didn’t know this was it.

  “Why don’t they warn us?” She asked, gasping. Suddenly, the apartment felt small. Too small. She couldn’t breathe, and she reached for her throat.

  “Breathe, Serenity,” Wrath’s deep voice reached to her through the darkness that was spreading through the room. “Take a deep breath. It’s going to be okay.”

  She didn’t listen. She opened her mouth to scream, but nothing came out. She was going to die. That’s what this came down to. She was going to die, to be destroyed, and no one could save her. No one could help her. They were going to destroy her.

  They were going to kill her.

  “Serenity!” Wrath’s voice suddenly was loud, and close, and she looked at him. His hands were on her shoulders, and they were both in the living room. How had they gotten here? She didn’t remember getting up from the table, didn’t remember leaving the kitchen.

  “I can’t, I can’t,” she sputtered, shaking her head. Wrath pulled her into his arms and held her tightly.

  “You can,” he said. “And I will be here, Serenity. I will protect you. I will watch over you.”

  “I need to paint,” she whispered, and he let her go. She went over to her easel and picked up her paintbrush. She cried as she began to work on something new, something she’d never made before. The tears slid down her cheeks silently as she moved the brush over the canvas, over and over and over again.

  “It’s okay to be scared.”

  “I’m not scared.”

  Wrath laughed. “Could’ve fooled me.”

  She glared at the painting, but didn’t turn to see him. She wasn’t scared. She was terrified. She also didn’t want him to know that about her, didn’t want him to realize what an effect this was having on her.

  “It’s okay,” he repeated. “To be scared. We’re all scared sometimes, Serenity. It’s what we choose to do with that fear that matters.”

  “That matters?” She spun around, paintbrush still in hand. She glared at him because right now, he was the one telling her about all of the evil in the world. She didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want it to be true. Right now, Serenity wanted, for the very first time since she’d cut off her wings, to just go home.

  She just wanted to be home.

  “The only thing that matters is that I made a choice, Wrath. I made a choice to be human for a man I loved and he left me.”

  Wrath’s eyes widened ever-so-slightly, but he didn’t react. He just stood there, waiting, watching her. His big arms were crossed over his chest, but he just looked at her. He was more patient than anyone Serenity had ever met, and she wasn’t quite sure what to do about that.

  “Tell me,” he said.

  “I loved him. I wasn’t even supposed to be on Earth, but that’s never mattered, has it?”

  Wrath shook his head. Serenity was sure he’d had his own adventures on Earth as a demon. Sneaking onto the planet wasn’t exactly difficult for an otherworldly being.

  “We fell in love and I…I didn’t want to live without him. I didn’t want an eternity without him. I wanted to be on Earth with him, to have babies with him, I-”

  She stopped talking because the sobs boiling in her throat threatened to spill out.

  “I want you to be happy, Serenity. I want you to love again.” Oliver took her hand and squeezed. He was weak, and she was broken.

  “I will never love anyone the way I loved you,” she whispered, crying as she watched him. He looked so small in the giant hospital bed: nothing like the man she’d fallen in love with. Cancer had stolen so much from him, but it was going to steal just a little bit more.

  “You can learn to love in a different way,” Oliver promised, and the smile he offered was full of hope, of joy. “I have loved you so much, Serenity. You have made my life magical. You have made my soul sing.”

  She dropped to the floor. She couldn’t handle these memories. Not right now. For so long, Serenity had kept them locked up, tucked away. For so long, she hadn’t wanted to access those memories. Not because she didn’t miss Oliver, but because missing him hurt so very deeply.

  “He loved you,” Wrath said simply. “And you loved him. That’s how it was with me and Harmony. We were completely in love, and then she was gone, stolen from me. It wasn’t fair. The world isn’t fair, Serenity. The world is dark, but you don’t have to face the darkness alone.”

  Serenity looked back at the painting she had started, at the dark strokes she had made on the canvas. It looked angry, violent: nothing like her usual paintings.


  Then again, there was nothing usual about this day.

  “When I first became human, I didn’t have a choice,” Wrath said. “I didn’t choose to cut off my horns and there was no one waiting here who loved me. When they sent me here, all I could think about was the fact that this was the place where Harmony died. This was the place my darling was stolen from me, swept away. This was the place where she had been, and then she was gone.”

  “What did you do?” Serenity whispered, not looking at him. She kept her eyes focused on her painting. She concentrated on holding her paintbrush tightly, on not letting it fall to the ground because she knew that if she dropped it, she would be done. She wouldn’t be able to pick it up again. She wouldn’t have the energy or the heart, and painting was the only way she could deal with any of this.

  “The only thing I could do. I tried to live.”

  “In her honor?”

  “Yes.”

  “How’s that working out for you?”

  “I met you, didn’t I?”

  Serenity was quiet when he said that. Maybe she’d just never learned how to take a compliment. She wasn’t sure. She did know one thing, though, and that was that Wrath was unlike anyone she’d ever met. He was a mystery, even to her, and that wasn’t necessarily a good thing.

  She turned back to the painting and began to touch the canvas once more. This time, she stared at it with the power of a thousand suns, with the burning sadness of someone who had lost everything.

  Chapter 11

  Wrath watched Serenity paint.

  “You look beautiful when you do this, you know.” He wasn’t hitting on her. He was already at her house, already having dinner. He didn’t have to hit on her to get her attention, but she just shook her head.

  “You think life is easy,” she accused.

  “On the contrary,” he said. “I think it’s very, very hard.”

  “Then how do you do it?” She said quietly.

  “Do what?”

  “Act like this is the first time you’ve been alone with a woman. Act like this is the first time you’ve been vulnerable. You’re opening up to me, Wrath, and I don’t deserve it.”

  Her words surprised him. He didn’t consider himself good with words or with people at all. He certainly didn’t consider himself good with women, but Serenity was different. She wasn’t just some woman he had met at art class.