by TJWEST
His eyebrows furrowed together, looking confused. “Why does he want to meet me? He doesn’t’ know me.” He asked innocently.
“You’re right, he doesn’t, but he’s known about you for a very long time, and is now very much interested. You understand?”
Here’s the question that broke my fuckin’ heart. “Why didn’t he want to know me when I was a baby?” Joey’s innocent expressions kill me. He’s got no fuckin’ clue as to why a douche like Barbie would abandon him and his mother. Explaining in detail cannot happen - he’d never understand.
“That’s a very good question.” Sandy sternly agreed. “Unfortunately I can’t explain that. What I can explain is…is Blaine wants a chance to know you now…. and he hopes you want the same thing.” I can see on Sandy’s face that this was crushing her. She’s being as brave and strong as she can for her son. She’s amazing.
With a puzzled, worrisome look, Joey asks me, “Does this mean you can’t be my dad?”
Fucking hell.
I immediately move to Joey’s side. “No...no of course not bud. I’ll still be your dad - that won’t ever change. It’s really complicated to explain. When you become an adult you’ll understand a lot better. When that time comes we can discuss it again.” I try as I hard as I can to reassure him that I’ll always be a part of his life, whether “Barbie” was there or not. “Adoption is sometimes just paperwork - I’ll still be your father even if it’s not on paper. I’ll still love you the same.” My voice strained on those last few words. I almost choked, but felt Sandy’s warm arms gather around my middle.
Thank God Joey didn’t catch my weakness because he smiled at me again. “Maybe after I meet him you can adopt me?” He had such hopefulness in his voice it was hard not to be hopeful with him.
I slightly chuckle, “Maybe so. Maybe so son, but look at it this way, you’ll have two dads instead one. It’s not often when someone goes from havin’ no dads to two in a matter of a few months. You’re a lucky kid, bud……. we okay?” I hear Sandy’s breathing on my back. She sniffed, but not wanting Joey to see her cry, she kept her face hidden.
“Yep!” Joey happily says.
I raise my hand and grin. “High five, little man.” He slaps my hand and keeps on smiling. If only I were as positive as he was.
Sandy unwraps herself from my waist and hugs Joey. “Love you so much. You’re such a good boy and I’m so proud of you.”
“Thanks mom. Thanks. I love you too.” The innocence this kid has is mindboggling. I’d hate to see that go away, but for now it’s something I won’t take for granted. “So...can I go back to my show now?”
Sandy and I chuckle. Joey made this too easy and was ready to move on. Fuck, he was a great kid.
Chapter 25
Sandy
My son is my hero, through and through; Joey may not fully understand what is going on, but he has a positive outlook with even the worst case scenarios - I couldn’t be more proud. Watching my two guys develop a bond brought me to tears. It didn’t matter if Quinn adopted Joey or not - as long as they had each other that was the important thing. I was still wanting Joey to take Quinn’s last name, but I’m sure Blaine will have something to say about that. I’m not sure how things are going to go down once he and Joey become more acquainted, but there was only one way to find out - I had to call him.
Quinn handled the situation so much better than I ever thought - I shouldn’t be surprised, but I was; being so angry and lethal yesterday, I wasn’t sure if he could talk about Blaine with Joey. Instead he was my rock, my better half. He is such a good man, father, lover, partner - what more could I ask for in one person?
Joey and Quinn are in the frontyard working on Quinn’s motorcycle; he’s showing Joey how to fix something that looks completely foreign to me. They are making me smile, they look so cute together; they both have smears of grease on their cheeks and hands - it’s too adorable for words.
While watching them work from the living room window, my cell phone is tightly held in my grasp; I’m dreading the phone call to Blaine. I stare down at the blank screen, hesitant to contact him; not wanting to hear his voice again. Shit. I scroll through my contact list until I find his number - I click send and the ringing takes effect.
Blaine picks up after the second ring. “Hello.” He answers earnestly.
“Come by at eleven.” I say, not even bothering to repeat hello back.
I hear him exhale on the other end. “Good. Yeah, okay. What’s your address?”
I cringe as I tell him our home address; I couldn’t believe this was actually going to happen - my son was going to meet his biological father!
“Sandy...Thank you.” He kindly expresses.
Sounding tense I tell him, “Don’t know why you’re thanking me. Didn’t have much of a choice.”
“We always have choices, and I’m thanking you because you made the right one.”
I snap at him. “Don’t screw this up, Blaine, or there will be hell to pay, believe me.”
“Why would I screw this up? I want to be in Joey’s life; I’m not a junkie, or some con, Sandy, I’m just a regular guy, with a regular job who wants a second chance. Don’t you think we all deserve second chances?”
He got me there. I was dumbfounded and felt guilty for being snarky and judgemental. I needed to get my act together before tomorrow. I exhale, “Sorry. You’re right.” Before we hung up I decided to inform Blaine about Joey’s Autism. “You must know what that is.”
“Yes, I do.” Sounding surprised. “The spectrum is huge, but is he severe?”
“No. In fact he’s very high functioning.” I explained more of Joey’s qualities and personality. I was beginning to feel more at ease once I gave Blaine all the facts.
“I’m really glad you told me. I teach a lot kids who have Aspergers so I know what I’m getting myself into.”
Starting to get uncomfortable with how easily it was to talk with Blaine, I quickly end the call. “Okay….so…see you at eleven?”
“Yeah, see you then.”
Once we hung up, I plopped myself onto the couch, and closed my eyes. Thank God that’s over,
I thought to myself. But in truth, it wasn’t over - it won’t ever be over - it was just beginning.
After I gave myself some time to let everything sink in, I joined my boys outside.
“Yeah, good job, my man!” Quinn praised Joey, patting him on the shoulder.
“Thanks!” Joey proudly exclaimed.
I didn’t want to interrupt them, but I was hungry and wanted to get out of the house. Quinn saw me approach and winked at me. “Hey, Shorty.” Even with his dirty face, I wanted to kiss the hell out of him. I came up to him and gave him a sweet peck. He smelled of grease and sweat, but man he was gorgeous.
“Mom! I’m learning how to rebuild a vintage husky engine!” Joey said, as he was showing me the part.
I chuckle, “A vintage what? - ya know what, nevermind, I won’t understand anyway. I’m just glad to see you’re enjoying yourself.”
“It’s fun, and I am!”
“So, who’s hungry?”
Joey and Quinn both say, “Me!”
I laugh at their unison. “Good. Go get cleaned up so we can go get lunch, alright?”
“Yeah, because my hands are filthy!” Joey placed the tools back in the toolbox and ran into the house.
When Joey was out of sight, Quinn grabbed me by my waist, with his blackened hands, sinking his ever so hot mouth onto mine and explored my tongue - making me go weak in the knees.
“You wanna help me clean up?” Quinn asked in a very persuading tone - sexy tone that is.
Clearing my throat I whisper, “God you are too sexy for words right now, but if I agreed to help, I’d never want to leave, so no, you better clean up by yourself.” Still breathing heavily.
He chuckles, “You’re loss, Shorty.”
I playfully slap him on the shoulder, smirking. “Go get cleaned up, mister!”
&n
bsp; Quinn chuckles, as he smacks me on my behind, and slowly jogs into the house. Sexy.
After we went out for lunch we came home and watched “The Hunger Games” movie; Quinn surprised me by buying the blu-ray version, since I had just finished the book and was anxious to see it. All three of us mounted in front of the new flat screen tv and dove into the film, munching on popcorn and M&M’s.
“That was so much fun! Loved it!” I exclaimed. “What’d you think Joey?”
“Awesome, except for the part where that little girl died.” Joey had cried during a scene where one of the characters got killed. He’s my sensitive, sweet boy.
Nudging Quinn’s ribs, I asked, “What about you, big guy, what’d you think?”
Shrugging, he replied, “Good, I guess.”
“Oh you. It was so good! Next time we’ll watch something you like.” I gave him a peck. “But thank you for buying it for me.”
“Anything to make you happy, Shorty.” He muttered.
I sighed from his comment. He knew just how to make a girl happy. I hated to break our happy moment, but I had to tell him I talked with Blaine. “Joey, can you take the popcorn bowl into the kitchen for me? Put it in the sink?”
“Sure mom, sure!”
When he was out of earshot I turned to Quinn. “I talked with Blaine today. -” I wasn’t surprised when his grip tightened upon my knee. “ - I’ve allowed him to come here tomorrow at eleven.”
I could tell he was trying to stay calm about what I had just confessed. He closed his eyes, breathing heavily through his nose, gritting his teeth. He nodded, responding with a tight edge to his voice, “Yeah. Got it.”
“Are you going to be here when he shows up?”
He scoffed. “Of course! Not gonna storm off this time. Promise you that, babe.”
I leaned in and kissed him deeply when Joey came back to the living room, crying out, “Ew! Gross!”
Quinn and I got a good chuckle at his reaction. “Hey, mister…. need to talk to you.” I patted the couch.
“What is it?” He asked.
“Uh….well….Blaine and I talked earlier today. He’s here in San Diego and wants to visit tomorrow.”
“Already?”
“Yes.... Are you okay with that?”
He shrugged. “I guess so.”
“You sure?”
“Will you and Quinn be here?”
Quinn stepped in. “Wouldn’t be anywhere else, bud.”
“Then I’m sure.”
“Come here.” I opened my arms and held my son. “Love you so much.”
“Love you too, mom.”
After a few hours of tossing and turning, and finally falling asleep, my cell vibrated, waking me up. I glanced at Quinn - he didn’t budge, thank goodness, but what the hell? Who was calling at three in the morning? I didn’t recognize the number - wasn’t from our area, so I didn’t answer. Aggravated from being woken up I curled my body against Quinn’s - feeling his husky, muscular back warming my front - and slowly fell back to sleep.
Three hours later I felt the scratchy surface of Quinn’s stubble, tickling my stomach. From the crappy way I slept last night I was so glad to be woken up by the hottest man ever.
“Mornin’, Shorty.” Quinn said, huskily.
“Morning.” I whisper.
“I wanna fuck you before the cyclone hits today.”
Oh my God, I love when he talks dirty. “I’m all yours. Take me.”
Lord have mercy, it was a great morning.
While Quinn was in the shower I prepared waffles for breakfast. I truly was not hungry enough to eat anything; my stomach had butterflies attacking my appetite, which was not a pleasant feeling. Coffee was about as much as I could handle. Joey seemed in great spirits, though. He woke up happy, and I hate to say it, he seemed excited; he was humming to himself the minute he stepped out of his room, with a big grin on his face.
“Ready to eat, mister?” I asked.
“Yep!”
I gave him a kiss on top of his head and proceeded with making his waffles. Quinn appeared just as I had placed the batter in the waffle maker. He lightly kissed my lips and got himself a cup of coffee.
“Breakfast?”
“Not hungry, but thanks, babe.” He replied glumly, sipping his hot coffee.
“Yeah, same here.” I said in a low voice. I finished the last drop of my coffee and told Quinn I was going to take a shower.
I stayed in the hot water longer than usual, not wanting to get out, but the water started turning cold so I had no choice, but end my shower. A knock at the door startled me, making me almost lose my balance. I yelped, hanging on the side of the shower door.
“Shorty, you okay?” Quinn asked as he stepped inside the bathroom.
I chuckled. “Yes, you just scared me, that’s all.”
Quinn grabbed a towel from the rack and wrapped me tightly, lifting my chin to kiss me.
“Sorry. Got worried about you.”
Sighing, I said, “I’m okay. Just needed some time alone; drain my thoughts.”
“Yeah, know what you mean.”
There was such melancholy between us, that all I wanted to do was hide underneath the covers all day and make Blaine disappear, hoping that he was just a bad dream and none of this was really happening. Unfortunately, I knew deep down that this was the right thing. I didn’t want Quinn to know this because he wanted so much to give Joey his last name, and claim him as his own. Hopefully things will go smoothly and it won’t be as bad as we had imagined.
Eleven came around pretty quickly once I had gotten dressed and tidied up the house, because that doorbell rang annoyingly loud, reminding me that Blaine was here on time.
Joey came running out into the living room, asking me if he could open the door. I hesitated, looking at Quinn for approval, but he just had his arms crossed, with uncertainty on his face - the doorbell rang again. Shit! I put my hand on Joey’s shoulder and stood by him as we both opened the door.
There he was, face to face with my child - eyes wide open, lips slightly parted - apparently stunned to see the boy he abandoned looking at him like he was a rock star. I could feel he didn’t expect Joey to be standing right next to me; he was nervous. He had the tips of his hands snug into his front jeans pockets, looking down at him, then glancing in my direction. It was such an awkward, intense moment, but Joey was certainly giddy on his arrival - that was no surprise to me; Joey is the happiest little boy I have ever known.
The silence was killing me so I made the first move. “Please, come in.” I said, with a low, shaky tone.
He nodded, saying, “Thanks,” making his way inside the front entryway. I saw him notice Quinn from across the room - he stiffened. How could I blame the guy? Quinn looked like a bodyguard, ready to attack if anyone stepped out of bounds. I wanted to tell him to back down, but he had every right to feel threatened. No matter how uncomfortable things may have been, Blaine still acknowledged Quinn’s presence and said, “Quinn.”
Through a clenched jaw, Quinn responded, “Blaine.”
Still holding on to Joey’s shoulders, I took the lead and initiated the introduction. “Blaine, this is Joey - Joey, this is Blaine Sullivan.”
Joey stuck out his hand happily and said, “Hi!”
Blaine was in awe of him, from what I saw in his expression. Taking Joey’s smaller hand into his, Blaine finally said, “Nice to meet you, Joey.”
With a smile on his face, Joey replied, “You too!” Separating their hands, but still looking at one another, Joey continued, “You have blue eyes too! That must be why mine are blue because we share the same genes! Just like my hair; it’s blonde like yours!”
Blaine lightly chuckled, “Yes, that definitely is true.”
“I have a question.” Joey said with a small scowl. “How come you didn’t want to meet me when I was a baby?”
Oh, my God, what a way to break the ice, Joey! I shouldn’t be surprised my son would abruptly ask this sort of thing, but I w
as. Blaine looked almost as shocked as I was, Quinn, however, wasn’t; he was still standing in his is power stance, staying silent and reserved. “Uh, Joey, honey, - “ Blaine interrupted me.
“No, it’s okay, it’s a fair question. Can we sit down?”
How Blaine was ever going to explain this to a ten year old, I had no idea. Maybe he had it planned out in his head, ready for anything unexpected? No matter what, I definitely did not want to be in his shoes.
I led us over to the couch and offered him a glass of water - he said no and took a moment to rehash his thoughts. I looked over at Quinn - he was still in his spot. He made eye contact with my pleading ones; I jerked my head at him to get his ass over by mine. He sighed, uncrossed his arms and sat very, very close to me on the loveseat. I gripped his hand with mine and held firmly. His other arm made it around my shoulders, dragging me even closer.
Even though the couches were close together, I felt so remote from my little boy, who was inches away from this total stranger. What was he thinking right now? - If only I could be inside his head at this moment. He was so much stronger than I ever was at his age - he amazed me.
Blaine cleared his throat and began revealing his absence.
Good luck, bub, I was thinking.
“I played football in highschool - you like football?”
Joey shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, but Quinn and I have played before, right Quinn?”
“That we did, little man.” Quinn replied with a smirk.
Blaine continued, “Well, in school it was a big part of my life. My goal was to play in the NFL, to play professionally. I received a scholarship for college so I could continue playing the game. Your mom and I were together for a short while, so unfortunately we didn’t know each other very well. I was caught up in school and football that my life wasn’t prepared for a baby…”
And I was ready? I silently scoffed. Joey didn’t have a comeback even though I was secretly hoping he would.
“....I was young, selfish and made some stupid decisions back then. I didn’t care about anything but myself, and that, Joey, was wrong. I was wrong to ignore your mom, to ignore you. I would give anything to take it back……..to see you as a baby, and to help your mom take care of you…...”