Cody was still hugging me when Digs placed his hand on his shoulder. “Dude, do you mind. You’re encroaching on my hugging time.” Cody smirked and let me go as Digs swooped in for a hug. “Excellent gig baby girl.” He patted my hair down and away from my face. Digs was always looking after me.
That first gig we played was an incredible buzz. I’ll never forget the feeling of walking out there to a crowd that was actually there to see us play. Our own fans. I still couldn’t believe I was actually doing all of this, and I had the four guys in the band to thank for letting me be part of it.
Alfie stood with his arms folded, looking like he might punch Cody or Digs, but I was secretly pleased that he wasn’t immune to the fact that guys could hit on me just as women were doing with him all the time.
If he needed further evidence of that, it was to come after the show. We had been fairly fortunate these past couple of weeks when we went out. There hadn’t been that much opportunity for his fans to interfere with our private lives, apart from a few times at the club, but we dealt with that.
We were set up for a ‘meet and greet’ session with some of the fans backstage. There were a few that had won contests at a local radio station, and there were some that had been selected from our newly formed fan club.
My camp of fans seemed to be split into two groups; the high school or first year college kids on one hand and some very muscular guys about my age on the other.
The fans were mainly polite and wanted to talk about our music, but two of the older guys passed me CDs to sign. Both had written notes with their telephone numbers on it. When I opened one of them to sign the paper inside, he had put a naked picture of him inside and winked at me when I looked up at him.
Unnerved, I politely signed the CD paper and drew pants on the photo before handing it back. When he saw me do this and hand it back he said in a low voice, “You don’t know what you’re missing, baby.”
Smiling sweetly, I nodded for him to take it back saying, “Yeah, I do, I’ve seen you now remember? And from what I saw, I’m not missing much. Sorry but I prefer a bit of mystery in my men. Maybe you shouldn’t have been so…out there with the picture.”
Lennon’s sixth sense kicked in, and he appeared at my side. “Sorry honey, it’s taking too long we need to move it along a little.” Ever the diplomat, Lennon came to my rescue. When we talked about it later, they all shrieked with laughter at what I’d done. Even Alfie thought it was funny, after a few minutes of cussing about the naked-picture-cd guy.
Chapter 25 – Cubbie
Alfie traveled on the bus with us to Virginia, and he had booked us into a hotel. We didn’t arrive there until 5am, but we weren’t needed at the venue until 3pm.
I would have been happy sleeping on the bus, because it was still a novelty for me. Alfie was much less enthusiastic about doing that due to his years of traveling like this.
“It’s bad enough when I have to do this. Plus, I haven’t seen you in a week. I’m not getting laid in a bunk bed our first night together again. I’d definitely pull a muscle, and it’s fucking impossible to change position in those things. What if I wanted to stand?” He smirked.
I stared back at him completely deadpan. “Who said anything about getting laid? Is that why you made the effort?”
Alfie chuckled. “I knew I should have taken that blow job from that butch looking security chick.”
I snickered. “I meant that it would have been you who would have giving the blow job to security had I not given you the backstage pass.”
I bunched my brows at him, and he looked straight at me. “Ah, but that was you assuming that it would be a dude I’d have to get past. She actually looked disappointed that I had a pass because she definitely wanted to blow me, being famous an’ all.” My jaw dropped. Alfie was way too quick for me.
Settling into bed, it felt amazing to be in Alfie’s arms again. We were exhausted by the time we finally got off the bus but still managed two rounds of lovemaking.
We had this intensively intimate but awkward moment when Alfie was lying on top of me. We were getting carried away, and he rolled completely over me, settling between my legs and taking his weight on his forearms.
He leaned back to look at me and dropped his head onto my forehead again, just like he had so many times before. “I just want you to love me for the rest of my life.” I smiled, and we continued to stare into each other’s souls.
The tip of his cock was lined up with my trickling wet, swollen folds. I ached for him to be inside. He nudged me there several times, teasing me, almost entering me. It felt amazing, his hard, bulbous head with the smooth, silky skin, and the metal of his apa, almost breaching me.
My legs instinctively widened, and he nudged forward just a little more. The head of his cock was being hugged by my entrance. “Fuck. That feels so fucking perfect. You’re so ready for me,” he said huskily, his voice soft and thick with sexual tension.
“I just want to slide myself so deep inside you right now, Lily. All it would take is one little push of my hips, and I’d be balls deep, filling you completely and your sweet pussy, hugging my skin.” He swallowed hard, staring at me.
I knew what he was asking. He wanted permission not to use the condom. He wanted to be with me, skin to skin, but I had no idea if he had been protecting himself with Zoe. Apart from that, the last time this happened, I had a pregnancy scare. So I shook my head. “Don’t. Get the condom, Alfie.” He breathed deeply, closed his eyes and nodded, not stopping to argue. I was worried that rejecting his request was going to ruin the moment, but it didn’t.
The pleasure we gave each other was incredible, and we were so in tune with each other, it took me to new heights. He told me that no other woman has ever made him feel how he did when he was with me. This made me feel so lucky, because it was the same for me.
After he put the condom on, there was much less restraint. He was more like the Alfie I knew in the beginning, but I guess it was the first time we’ve been able to have sex without someone else within earshot. Obviously, any people next door in a hotel room didn’t count for that purpose.
Playful and adventurous in his lovemaking, it turned me on so much to have my sexy, sensual, drop-dead gorgeous Alfie back. I have never forgotten what it felt like when Alfie touched me. The chemistry between us was always electric and when he was inside me, I couldn’t describe what he did to me.
Sometimes the sex between us bordered both ecstasy and agony. For me anyway, it was the ecstasy of the release and the agony of the tease leading up to it. His strength and stamina made me delirious at times.
It used to terrify me that I would never have the connection we have with anyone else. When I said this to Alfie, his feelings were the same.
It was the reason he had never dated anyone since me until he met Zoe. I couldn’t stop myself from asking when he said that, I had to know, but I wasn’t sure that I wanted the answer either.
“So you felt the same chemistry as we had with Zoe?” I was lying with my head on Alfie’s chest, drawing lazily on his torso with my index finger and trying to pretend I was being casual about my question.
“Hell no, Lily, I told you, I never even came close to the feelings I have for you with anyone else.” He adjusted my head in the crook of his arm so that he could look at me. “Are we being honest here?” I nodded.
“I wouldn’t have asked. I’m curious,” I squeaked, but inside my heart was beating two beats for one, not wanting him to tell me about some of his conquests, which I was sure was coming next.
“Every fucking night women threw themselves at me. Some did crazy things with no shame, just to try to get my attention. I hated it, because all it did was make me miss you more.”
“Then there was Zoe,” I pointed out, expecting a proclamation of how she made him feel. Alfie had a high sexual appetite, but I sensed with her it was more than just
sex; it wasn’t just a physical thing like he’d said. Smiling at me, he took my hand, lacing our fingers together, and looking at them when he did it. When he glanced back at me, he exhaled.
“Zoe…she came into my life at a low point. Until her, I hadn’t had sex with anyone else since you. Almost fifteen months I waited, thinking you would find me again, Lily.”
My jaw gaped, and I moved my head up lying eye to eye with him. He really did feel the same as me back then. Even, in the beginning, when he was denying his own feelings.
I bunched my brows thinking that all the while I had expected Alfie to be out there lapping up the fame and excess, he was miserable inside because of me and my dreams.
Staring straight at me, I waited for him to continue. “Zoe was working in a truck stop we were having breakfast in one morning. It was quiet, and we were the only people around. She poured herself a coffee and, without being invited, sat beside us saying she was “bored shitless here.” She knew who I was but wasn’t impressed by fame.”
He snickered at the memory. “She has a good heart, and she needed to be rescued from that place. Before I knew what I was doing, I told her to come along with us for the ride. She took off her apron and climbed on the bus. She took a chance, that’s how desperate she was for change. She just hung out with us guys, and we developed a friendship.”
I rubbed my hand lazily over the smooth skin on his hard chest, and traced it over the ink on his arm, continuing to listen. “I was drinking a little too much after that and one night I told her all about you. Not your name. I didn’t want her using your name when she spoke to me about you. It just didn’t seem right for some reason. She listened and gradually, I began to put the pieces of my life back together.”
He swallowed audibly. “It was after Mandy sent me the video of you… it set me back. When I saw you play in the club, I thought I had lost you for sure.”
Alfie snickered. “She wasn’t stupid, and I was honest from the start with Zoe.” I was listening to him talk and remembered that he’d been the same way with me, telling me that he couldn’t get involved with me.
“We both knew that what we were doing wouldn’t last, that’s why I insisted on setting her up with her own place and gave her some money. That way she could walk when she got “bored shitless” with us.” He chuckled.
He cleared his throat. “Anyway, she listened, and I think I would have gone into a free fall if she hadn’t been there for me at the time.
“Gradually, I began to put the pieces of my life back together, and that’s when my relationship with Zoe became physical.” I found it hard to swallow when he voiced that.
“Neither one of us made a play for each other, we were just drunk one night, and it happened. She was a temporary substitute for you, Lily.”
As Alfie had been honest, I wanted to be honest with him as well. “It makes me insanely jealous that she had you, even for a short time,” I whispered.
“She never had me, Lily. We had sex, but I think my heart has belonged to you since the day I met you, even if I didn’t know it at the time.” He smiled.
“Luca…” I began to tell him about Luca, but his body tensed, and he cut me off. “I don’t want you to tell me about him, Lily. I could see that feelings were involved.” Alfie’s jaw muscle ticked.
“What Zoe and I had was just friendship and sex. I had nothing to offer her. With you and that guy…like you said, you didn’t want to be with someone just for the physical side of a relationship. You’re with me now, and whatever shit happened between you in the past is done, right?” I nodded and raised myself onto my elbow to see his face.
“You are all I’ve ever truly wanted, Alfie.” I smiled at him and gazed lovingly into his eyes.
“Yeah. Me and music,” he corrected. I lay back and placed my forearm over my head, ignoring the blunt way he said it.
“We’ll make it this time, Alfie. Look at us we’re talking about what really matters. Maybe we’d have been together for a short while before, but now, we’re going into this wiser, and I’m ready now. We know what we have to do.”
He turned his body to face me. “C’mere.” I turned my body inwards to meet his. Sliding one arm under my neck, his other pulling me flush against his warm, hard body. His scent and his warm arms were around me, his hand splayed on my back, holding me tightly to him. It felt perfect.
Alfie’s breath disturbed the air over my face. “No one and nothing is taking you away from me again.” He swallowed noisily. “Nothing.”
Another watershed, here we were, able to talk openly and get our feelings out there. We were both desperate for things to work out with us this time, and it was a great that we were both still able to follow our dreams. We lay in bed as long as we could, just wrapped up in each other, fully content to just be together.
Will came to see me when we were in Ohio, after Alfie had gone back. I was thrilled that he made the effort. It was great to catch up on all his news. It was brilliant to hear he was in a relationship, and I felt really happy for him. I was so glad to hear that; he really was a fantastic person.
I never arranged to see him again. I figured we’d just keep in touch like we have been doing. Besides, if I had, I doubt whether Alfie would be too keen on Will and me making plans. He’d made his position about Will very clear in the past. Alfie saw Will as a threat despite my constant reassurances. He had nothing to worry about on that score.
Alfie came to see me a couple more times during the last week of the tour. Once we did have to sleep on the bus and Alfie was right about the ‘bunk bed sex’. It was an experience. A hot, sweaty, claustrophobic one and we thought we had been quiet until Shawn’s frustrated voice bellowed from two beds down.
“Are you all done back there now? I put my headphones on, but the side of the fucking bus was shaking, so you were both a bit hard to ignore down there, and I need to get some sleep.”
Alfie chuckled and winked, calling out, “Yeah, Lennon, put that dirty magazine down, we’re all trying to sleep here, dude.”
I was mortified, but I knew I would have to learn to accept that this way of life meant that there were very few secrets between us, either that or everyone’s sex lives was going to be severely curtailed. Anyway, I think that Shawn was just jealous. This was the first night in a week he hadn’t dragged some groupie on the bus with him.
The rest of the XrAid tour went brilliantly. Each concert performance was better than the last, and we couldn’t believe the following we were beginning to have. We met hundreds of fans, and Keiron was impressed with the numbers.
He began bringing in extra security as we were becoming recognizable. This made me nervous, but hell, I was dating one of the most popular guys on the planet, so either way, I wasn’t going to be allowed to fade into the background much longer.
By the time we arrived home in Miami, Alfie was in meetings arranging Crakt Soundzz’s upcoming tour. Alfie’s band had just recorded a new album before we got back together, and their tour dates had been arranged months ahead of that.
Supporting for Crakt Soundzz and Cobham Street was a daunting prospect, and we had twenty-two dates over a four week period. At least I was going along with Alfie this time, and we’d actually spend every day together when XrAid was supporting them for some of the tour anyway.
Alfie and I would wake up together at the very least. We were both on a natural high about this and about spending time with Elle and Drew as well. This was beyond anything I could ever have imagined. Best of all, traveling by bus, we’d have nothing else to do but be together.
XrAid had a ten day hiatus before we went on tour again, so I used the time to catch up with my ‘non band’ friends. I saw my bandmates for rehearsals, but we didn’t socialize.
Three weeks on a bus on the road, and we were sick of the sight of each other. We needed to recharge and regroup before we began living and breathing life on
the road again together.
Cody had turned into a bit of a drunken man-whore during the three weeks away. He was like a horny teenager with some of the women that threw themselves at him.
Most shocking from the tour was when I opened the dressing room door and felt like I’d stumbled onto a porn set. Three naked girls were getting down with Shawn.
One had her ass in the air, folded over the sink. Shawn was giving her a vaginal examination with his tongue. Another was rubbing her breasts near his face, and his junk was in the mouth of a third. When he’d heard the door open, he lifted his head, looked me in the eye, and smirked. Just smirked. Before turning his attention back on with what he was doing, like it was nothing. Guess Shawn must have taken my advice on the glitter.
After that display, I really didn’t worry that he may occasionally hear Alfie and me, we were in a normal relationship, unlike the less-than-natural stuff that seemed be going on in his sex life.
We all worked on our tans by sitting by the pool to catch some last minute sunshine. Being the middle of February and freezing in Europe, we were stocking up on vitamin D to carry us through the rest of the winter.
Tour demands meant we had to stay fit and healthy. That, and we had to be image conscious for the pictures that would be taken of us during the next month.
Chapter 26 – Bareback
Cobham Street’s tour had started three days ago. XrAid was performing at twelve dates with Crakt Soundzz and ten afterwards with Cobham Street. Their support act, Bubble Card, was to join Crakt Soundzz when we swapped over in Hamburg.
Alfie’s band was due to finish the tour a few days before Cobham Street, and we’d planned to meet up in London to see my parents.
XrAid, apart from me, was so excited to be going to Europe and acted like a bunch of kids. On stage it was a completely different matter, their dedication as musicians was never in question. Apart from their musical ability, all of them had shown me brotherly love and provided protection ever since I’ve known them.
Everything I want: Will Alfie and Lily's love survive?... Page 21