His Secret Love-Child

by Marion Lennox

  But she didn’t need to.

  Cal was out of the chopper and running toward them. He was climbing down into the boat, oblivious of the Americans climbing upward onto the jetty, oblivious of Bruce.

  He was gathering her into his arms. He was gathering his son into his arms, and by the way he held her she knew that this man would never let her go again.

  ‘I thought I’d lost you,’ he murmured.

  ‘It was CJ who fell.’

  ‘It makes no difference which,’ he told her, pressing his lips into her hair. ‘You and CJ. My loves. My two loves. I thought I’d lost my family.’

  The nursery lights were dim when they returned.

  Equanimity restored, CJ had headed to the hospital kitchen to tell Rudolph and Mrs Grubb all about the very exciting adventures of his hat. Hamish and Mike had disappeared to tell everyone the good news-though the radio call to Charles would have done the same thing. Cal and Gina fell behind, but somehow, because it seemed the right thing to do, the obvious thing to do, for this was who had brought them together in the first place, Cal and Gina ended up beside Lucky’s crib.

  Lucky was the only baby in the nursery, and he certainly had medical attention. Em, Mike, Hamish, Charles, Jill, and now Cal and Gina. They were all there.

  ‘There’s nothing wrong?’ Gina asked, startled at the mass medical gathering.

  ‘No,’ Jill said, and tried to look busy. ‘I was just checking Lucky’s obs had been done.’

  ‘And I was doing the obs,’ Em said.

  ‘And I was checking that Jill had checked that the obs had been done,’ Charles said, and grinned.

  ‘Hey, I’m the paediatrician,’ Hamish said. ‘I’m in charge of all of this. You can’t trust underlings these days.’

  ‘And I’m here in a paramedic capacity,’ Mike told them, also smiling. ‘When there’s so many people packed into a small room, there’s a risk of crush injuries and fainting. Especially when emotions are running high.’ He smiled across at his friends, his brows rising as he noted their linked hands. ‘And emotions seem suddenly to be running a notch higher. Well, well.’

  Gina blushed and tried to haul her hand away. Cal held it tighter.

  ‘But the baby’s OK?’

  ‘Lucky’s great,’ Jill said, smiling across at the pair of them. ‘He’s…lucky. And we were just talking…’

  ‘You were talking,’ Charles said. ‘Well, bossing, more like.’

  ‘I do not boss.’

  ‘Tell me what you were talking about,’ Gina said, taking pity on her.

  ‘We thought, seeing as this hospital has been so miserable…’

  ‘We’re not miserable,’ Cal said, and Gina gave her love a quelling look.

  ‘Shut up, Cal. You were saying?’

  ‘Tonight’s been declared a fire night.’

  ‘A fire night?’

  ‘We do it often,’ Cal told her, and there was such a smile in his voice that everyone heard it. Everyone saw it. Gina saw every one of their friends register his happiness, and her own joy increased because of it. ‘When we need to celebrate or commiserate or patch up a misunderstanding or whatever, we plan a fire night. We gather all the driftwood we can find on the beach and light it, like some sort of great tribal ceremony.’

  ‘Um,’ Gina said faintly. ‘Don’t tell me. You make sacrificial offerings and dance to the sound of didgeridoos, naked apart from three stripes of ochre on each cheek.’

  ‘Hey, I never thought of that,’ Hamish said, brightening.

  ‘We barbecue sausages,’ Jill said, quelling him with a look. ‘Much more civilised.’

  ‘Or prawns,’ Mike said, smiling down at their linked hands, ‘In times of high celebration we give sausages a miss and we barbecue prawns.’

  ‘I guess we are celebrating tonight,’ Em said softly. She put her finger through the access port in the incubator and stroked Lucky’s face. ‘We’ve had these awful deaths. We’ve had such awful…’ She paused for a moment. ‘Such awful things. But life goes on. CJ’s safe, and Lucky’s obs are completely normal. He’s wonderful. He really has been… Lucky.’

  ‘For more than just himself,’ Cal murmured, and Gina looked at her love and smiled.

  ‘He has.’

  ‘He’ll be loved to bits,’ Em said stoutly. ‘We’ll find his mum. I know we will. This little one was born to be loved. He’s just fine.

  ‘Everything’s fine,’ Cal said. ‘Everything and everything and everything.’

  Megan woke, unsure for a moment where she was. Moonlight was streaming in over her coverlet. The shivering had stopped. Her bed was warm and soft, and for just a moment she felt safe and secure, as if everything was OK.

  She’d been dreaming. And what a dream…

  She’d been holding her baby. Her little son. She’d leaned down and let her face rest against the soft down of his cheek and she’d smelt the new-baby smell of him. It had been so real it was with her still, a reality in a world that had gone mad.

  A reality.

  It was real. She could see him clearly, and she could sense that he was loved and cared for and at peace.

  Her baby was OK.

  She was no true believer. Somewhere along the way Megan had lost what religion she’s had, had lost it in despair and bleakness and the sheer desperate grind for survival.

  But now…

  Her baby was dead, she thought, but her arms still cradled him, her heart still held him.

  Her baby was loved.

  Her little son…

  He was waiting for her. Her tiny boy.

  Her baby.

  Away from the fire the beach was deserted. The last of the barbecued prawns had been eaten. Hamish was sitting on a mass of driftwood, strumming a guitar and humming something soft and sweet. Maybe dreaming of a girl back in Scotland? CJ and Rudolph had fallen asleep at his feet, a warm and contented bundle of small boy and dog, and when Cal looked queryingly at his friend, Hamish grinned and paused in his strumming long enough to indicate that his friend should go ahead. He’d take over child-and dog-minding duties.

  So Cal was free to lead Gina along the beach, out of the pool of light cast by the fire. Out of earshot of their friends.

  The night was still and warm. The tide was coming in and Gina and Cal were barefoot, soaking up the cool of the sea between their toes. Soaking up the serenity of the evening. The serenity of certainty-the knowledge that from here they’d move forward together.

  ‘I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid,’ Cal said softly. They’d been swinging their hands as they’d wandered toward the headland but now he paused and twisted so he was facing her. ‘What you’ve gone through alone, because of my stupidity…’

  ‘No.’ She took his face between her hands and smiled up at him. ‘Cal, if five years ago you’d wanted me, if you’d begged me to stay, if you’d wanted CJ as your son, there’d still have been Paul. And Paul was my husband. He was my friend. I’ve been thinking about it. If that phone call had come to say he’d been injured, and you’d loved me and wanted me, maybe I still would have had to go. And how much harder would it have been?’

  ‘You’d let me off…’

  ‘There’s no letting off,’ she told him. ‘Five years ago you weren’t ready for loving and I wasn’t free to return that love.’

  He thought about that for a moment and still found it unsatisfactory. ‘OK, then,’ he said, grudgingly. ‘But no matter how you look at it, we’ve still wasted two days.’

  ‘Um…right.’

  ‘I don’t want to waste any more time.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘So will you marry me?’

  She thought about it.

  ‘There’s a few conditions,’ she said at last.

  ‘Like what?’

  She tried to make her face stern. She tried to keep the loving laughter at bay-the joy from showing in her response. This was important.

  ‘You’re never to ask what my insulin levels are,’ she managed. ‘You’d be
my husband, Cal Jamieson, not my doctor. I’ve already asked Charles if he’ll be my physician and he’s agreed.’

  ‘But-’

  ‘No negotiation, Cal. I don’t need you as my doctor. Take it or leave it.’

  ‘I’ll take it.’

  ‘You’re never to sleep on the opposite side of the bed.’

  He grinned. ‘That’s a given.’

  ‘You’re to tell me when you’re worried or when you’re sick or when you’re frightened.’

  ‘So you get to know my insulin levels but I don’t get to know yours?’

  ‘I have the upper hand,’ she said serenely. ‘It may be the last time it happens so I’m making the most of it. Promise me, Cal.’

  ‘You drive a hard bargain.’

  ‘I know,’ she said smugly. ‘But it has to start now. So start. Are you worried about anything now?’

  ‘Um…yes.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘You might not promise to marry me.’

  ‘I have to think up some more conditions.’

  ‘What about loving?’ he said softly. ‘And needing. If I promise to need you every day of my life, every hour of every day, every moment…if I promise to need you…’

  ‘As much as I need you,’ she whispered. ‘I don’t think that’s possible.’

  ‘How can you still need me?’

  ‘My son loves your stupid dog,’ she said, and her hands slipped to his waist and tugged him into her. ‘CJ loves your dopey dog. I love him and the only way I can get this whole crazy family together is to agree to marry you. So you see…’ But she was forced to pause as his lips met hers, and the pause lengthened and lengthened. When finally she managed to speak again her voice had grown breathless. ‘So you see,’ she whispered. ‘I do need you.’

  ‘You’ll be my family?’

  ‘Of course I’ll be your family,’ she said, really, really unsteadily. ‘I think I already am. Maybe I’ve been your family for five long years and you haven’t even realised it. Even Paul…’

  ‘I owe Paul,’ Cal said, and the laughter suddenly disappeared as he tried to speak of what he’d been thinking. ‘Paul was your husband and his death has brought you back to me. But Paul’s decision-to face life, to search for what love truly was-was what brought you to me in the first place. He’ll always be honoured in our home.’

  ‘Oh, Cal…’

  ‘Will we have more kids?’ he asked, and she stared up at him in such astonishment that he leaned back to see what she was thinking.

  ‘What? What’s surprising about that?’

  ‘You want to extend our family?’

  ‘Family’s good,’ he said, tugging her back to him again. ‘Family’s great. Three days ago I was alone. Now I have you, I have my son and I have a dog. And I was wondering…’ He smiled against her hair. ‘Gina, if Lucky’s parents aren’t found…’

  ‘You’d want him?’ She could scarcely speak. This was so much how she’d been feeling herself.

  ‘I guess I’ve learned that love expands to fit all comers,’ he whispered. ‘Lucky brought you back to me. We could love him. Couldn’t we?’

  ‘Of course we could,’ she whispered. ‘Of course. Oh, Cal…’

  ‘And if we do find his parents…’

  ‘Then we’ll just have to work on making our own babies,’ she told him. ‘How about that for a good idea?’

  He didn’t answer. And she didn’t speak. His kiss was all the response she needed and their kiss lasted a very long time.

  ‘So you’ll marry me,’ he said at last into the stillness of the night, and she held him close and felt his heartbeat and wondered how he could ever ask that question.

  ‘Of course I will. My heart.’

  ‘Then I guess we should go back to the fire,’ he told her.

  She glanced along the beach, where their friends, the medics of Crocodile Creek, were clustered together on the warm sand.

  ‘They’re waiting,’ Cal said.

  ‘Waiting? For what?’

  ‘To know whether you’ve said yes.’

  ‘Did they know you were going to propose?’ Gina demanded, prepared to be indignant, but Cal smiled and hugged her to him, and then chuckled out loud.

  ‘Welcome to Crocodile Creek, Dr Lopez,’ he told her. ‘Welcome to our extended family. In this town-in this house-there is no such thing as a secret. There’s life and laughter and loving and…’ He tugged her hard against him and kissed her again, long and sweetly, with the promise of forever in his kiss.

  ‘And the best is yet to come.’

  Marion Lennox

  ***

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